Im back again everyone. Sorry for the wait, i actually wanted to surprise you with a double update (two in one day) but my day fell a little off track and now...its a little late. heheh. Anyway, i felt that the last chapter was way too short so thats why i wanted to give you the next part much faster. WARNING: Gin/Hitsu kisses, nuzzling and over all fluffiness with that borderline craziness only Gin can provide. [sidenote: to all those who simply read and dont review, lord knows i love you! thanks for even reading at all, you dont know how happy I am anyone even cares. but puhlease just once say something? Because thats what loves all about: give and take. lol. I'm so cheesy] Please read my announcement/question at the end of the story. Read, Review, Enjoy!
~~ Blue Skies part 2 ~~
A few days later, I sitting on the bleachers again during lunch, watching puffy white clouds roll by. Though I appeared to be staring off into space, I was in deep though. That morning I had received the shock of my life, going in to my parents room to say goodbye before heading off for school, only to find my mother curled into the side of a strange man. They were both sleeping so I hadn't woken them and slipped out the front door. Hopefully my father would come home soon enough to catch the my cheating mother in the act. Thoughts like this still depressed me, no matter how much I tried to pretend they didn't. How sweet: a whore for a mother and a workaholic father. What next? Maybe they'd scour up an abusive alcoholic uncle to come live with us and make it one big happy family. The worst part was, they were all content with their lives, everybody had embraced their roles and happily played along; everybody except me. At night there was nothing to comfort me- not thoughts of my money, or beauty, a lover, joy from a successful board room presentation or even a flourishing career. Did they think that I would be satisfied with the fact that I was still young? Youth could never replace that fact that I was indeed all alone in this world and most nights, I cried myself to sleep. A soft thump to my left caught my attention; out of nowhere, Gin had showed up and seated himself next to me, at a respectable distance, and was glancing up at the skies as well.
"Oh, its just you," I mumbled with a sigh. My voice seemed calm enough but I don't think the blush on my cheeks fooled him.
"Were yah expectin' someone else Shiro-chan?" his voice was lighting and happy.
"How many times must I tell you, its Hitsugaya-kun, not Shiro."
He giggled, tilting his head towards me, "Yah know, they call yah the Ice Prince behind yer back. Maybe I should call yah Hime."
"That's a princess you jerk. I'm not a girl," I snarled before I could help myself.
"Ne, ne I've noticed but with that hair and those big eyes, yah sure do look like one. Do I need ta be Prince Charmin' and kiss ya too, like sleeping beauty?" His grinned stretched, and he shook with laughter.
"Did you come out here to piss me off or was there some other purpose?"
"Nah, I didn't really have nothin' planned. Yah just looked so lonely I thought I might come sit with yah. If there's two lonely souls floatin' around, its only right they keep each other company, Hime," his words were soft and I looked over at him curiously. Gin's smile had faded once again but he was looking back at the clouds with a serious face.
"I suppose your right…"
"Mm-hum…now, do yah want ta tell me wats got yah so down? Looks like somebody just killed yer cat."
For a while I was quiet, considering if I should tell him the truth or not "My mother is a whore," I said finally. Maybe it would do some good to get that off my chest.
"Yare, Yare! Those 're some sharp words, Hime. Why would yah say that?"
"Don't call me Hime. And I found her in bed with another man. Its not the first time this month either. What would you call a woman like that?"
He pouted thoughtfully for a minute. "Ambitious?" I couldn't help but smile at that. We both sat there looking at the clouds but I'm sure our minds were far off elsewhere. Trying to be inconspicuous, I shifted closer and closer till our fingers brushed. Gin froze, looking down intently, like he couldn't believe I had touched him, then interlaced them.
"Do you really get lonely, Sensei? Don't you go out like my mother and have fun?"
"Ne, I've always been lonely Hime, since the moment I was born. Its hard ta explain, almost like life is empty fer me, but I'm sure yah know what I'm talkin' about." He smirked again but this time it was cold and I didn't know what to say.
Those words sounded so familiar: didn't I think the same thing all the time? Looking over at me he leaned in and I scooted over once again, our hands still interlaced and hips touching. Gin's breath trickled across my face. He smelt coco-nutty again, mixed with the faint air of peppermint. So intoxicating. "God I hope no one's watching. What am I doing? This is a teacher, this is an adult male almost twice my age…oh God." Of its own accord my neck tilted to the side and out lips almost brushed, hovering millimeters away from each other. I could almost taste him; like a wolf, he dipped lower sniffing along my neckline, grazing his silvery tresses against my cheek and I shook my head to clear my suddenly hazy thoughts.
"Ichimaru, stop it," I said hasily, pulling back to look into his piercing red eyes "This is wrong, so, so wrong. You're my teacher."
"Call me Gin, Toshiro. I think were past those formalities now."
"I'm fourteen years old Ichimaru, what are you doing? We could get into a lot of trouble."
"Did I ever tell you that you have the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen? So deep and blue, though I wonder if they've always been that icy."
Twisting away and screwing my eyes shut, I tried to stand but he easily slid me back to him, pressing our sides together gently. His change in grammar had frightened me, he seemed so much more intense and less playful now. We had gone too far.
"Let me go!" I huffed, turning my face away, making him grip my chin tightly "Ichimaru we cant do this. I'm a minor and you're a man. They'd put you in jail. You don't really want me, right? What's special about me?"
He continued as though I never spoke "But I can melt that ice, Toshiro, I can set your whole world on fire and you'll wonder how you ever survived out in the cold. All you have to do is let me and you'll never be lonely again."
"NO! Why me, why are you chasing me? You cant keep looking at me like that, with those eyes like you can peer into my soul! You cant follow me, or talk to me like this, touch me like this ever again! What's so special about me?" I shouted in confusion.
"Everything," he breathed, like I had asked the world's dumbest question. "I see so much of myself in you, and even more. I was never as pure and innocent as you are Toshiro, but I know how it feels to lived caged in your own misery, wishing someone would come and save you. So I will be the one to save you…whenever you're ready"
And then, he stood, straightening himself and plastering that eerie smile back on his face, closing his eyes and looked down on me as I kept shaking my head no. None of this could be happening; there was no way that he could expect me to fall in love with a man, 14 years older than me. No matter how intriguing his proposition was.
"No Ichimaru, I'll never be ready for this, for you… so please, just stop before whatever you're doing gets out of hand…"
"Ahh, Hime its no good ta beg with that kind of lost expression. It makes me want ta save yah even more," he sing-songed, walking away coolly, without a care in the world. And I watched him go, wondering how I could want something so much and fear it at the same time.
Despite how pathetic it would look to Gin, I stayed home the next two days, feigning a summer cold. There was no way I could face him after an encounter like that and I was sure he would try something again. While I was alone, I wrestled with what to do about the oddly aggressive man. The logical part of my brain told me to ignore him, continue to deny his claims and worse case scenario, I could report him to the police like any normal child did when harassed by a pedophile. Yet, the other half of me was completely unfazed by the fact that he was 28 years old, possibly crazy, and way too interested in me. Something about him called out to me so deeply that I had to fight the urge to run to him and kiss him right then and there! He was right about me that day on the bleachers; we were quite similar and the idea of a young Gin smiling out at the world even though he felt so abandoned inside seemed like the ying to my yang. Pride made me doubt that I would ever grow up to be that creepy, however. No matter how much he tried (going so far as to keep his eyes constantly squinted) Gin's handsome face would never hide that eeriness about him. He always seemed to know which buttons to push, just what topic he could broach to make me squirm and it was…exhilarating. Not because he got under my skin, but because he had cared enough to even try. Undeterred by the fact that I was just a lonely rich boy with a lot of baggage on my heart, Gin seemed to spend endless energy plotting on ways to make me fall in love with him. Besides, who was I to judge his taste? Didn't my attraction to Gin make me crazy as well?
Back in Gin's bedroom, I couldn't help but chuckle as I remembered all the things I went through before I finally admitted that I loved him. Back then, my ego was unimaginably huge and I didn't want to be swayed by a smooth talking, 6'2" man of 28 years old. It seemed so wrong but felt so right; just like right now. How was it possible that I loved a man so much but knew with every fiber of my being that how we felt about each other was dead wrong? The only difference between then and now was that I had stop caring about how other people would view us, even if it meant I had to leave everything else behind. Closing my eyes and continuing to reminice, I thought to myself "Even then I couldn't see anything else besides Gin's smiling face, like a love sick puppy looking through rose tinted frames. I guess its true that love is blind."
Okay i have a serious issue I've been thinking about. Everytime i split a chapter into two sections, my eye starts to twitch. i hate dividng up something which was written to be read in one go, but I either feel the chapter is too long or too short. So, here is where your opinion comes in: would you all rather faster updates but the chapters are in two parts, or slower updates that give each chapter all at once? Please review and tell me because I dont feel like updating until I've gotten this solved. (P.S: My doctor told me i was malnourished in love, so review and make me all better!)