Numb
Her fingers gently caressed his hand, smoothing over the fevered flesh in an almost reverent manner. Almost as if, through her touch, she was praying...nay, begging for him to come through this.
Her green eyes lifted, from gazing at their clasped hands, toward Jacen's face. Worry. Pain. A million and one emotions were dancing in the depths of her gaze...but the emotions were tempered, by the numb sense of self she'd pulled up as a shield in the last few days since she'd forced herself out of bed.
Her gaze slowly moved over his facial features. How many times had she looked into his face to find him smiling at her? Scowling? What she wouldn't give to see his eyes open at that moment. To feel her heart do that little flip-flop when he gave her one of his slightly
cocky grins that so much resembled those given by his scoundrel of a father.
Kyrra's brows drew together as a stab of pain shot through her. Han. She'd never have suspected that that roguish vibrant man would be brought low by something like a 'd always assumed the bolt from a blaster would snub out the renowned pilot and hero.
Thinking about her father-in-law, made her thoughts turn naturally onto her mother-in-law, Leia...then onto Luke...and finally Mara.
Grief roiled through her.
A grief so encompassing that she felt as if she was being swallowed down a large black hole. She struggled against that encroaching darkness, until she was able to regain control of her turbulent emotions.
She couldn't lose it now. She had to be strong, she reminded herself silently, continuing to slowly, tenderly caress her husband's hand.
But she'd lost so much. They all had.
She took a deep breath. Wishing she could wake Jacen...but afraid to wake him at the same time. Afraid to see how he would react when he found out...
Because Jacen not only had lost his parents, his aunt and uncle...
They'd lost a child. The virus had claimed their youngest son. So young, not even getting to see his first birthday. No first first word...
Kycen
Kyrra swallowed, pain etching across her face for a heartbeat, before she slammed her shields back more firmly into place.
She'd let herself mourn. Let herself feel the pain later.
But not now.
Now she had to be strong. For their remaining children. For Jacen.
Leaning forward, she gently lifted Jacen's hand up, brushing her lips against his knuckles...letting the side of her face nuzzle against his hand. It was as close to a hug as she could give him at the moment...or he could give her.
"Please, come back to me Jacen." she whispered, her voice cracking under the weight of the emotions battering at her shield. "I need you. Your children need you. Your siblings need you. So open your eyes and come back to us."