Okay. I had this worked out in my head, but actually getting it written out was a bit more challenging than I had thought it would be. I think I'm pretty much satisfied with it and hope you are as well. I have greatly appreciated the marvelous feedback I've received. I'm glad you're enjoying my alternative to the, in my opinion, debacle of a finale.

I suppose I should include a trigger warning. This chapter includes discussion of a miscarriage. It's not graphic, but it is mentioned. I did a little research (some very interesting things on my computer search history), but have, fortunately, no personal experience and hope I got it right.

Hope you enjoy and I'd love to know what you thought.

Alternative 6

"I'm so sorry, Robin," Lily told her softly, resting her head on the other woman's shoulder. "I just can't imagine what that was like for you."

Robin grunted quietly in agreement.

"I just wish we had been there for you," Tracy commented.

"We would have been, you know," Lily added. "I don't understand why you didn't tell us."

"I just couldn't," Robin confessed. "It just hurt too much to talk about it. I guess I didn't even realize how much I wanted it until it was gone."

Tracy nodded.

"I felt like such a failure."

"A failure?" Lily asked, confused.

"Women have been doing this since the beginning of time. Teen-aged girls can do it. You had both done it. But I couldn't. I had been told I couldn't and had made my peace with the fact, but then I was told that maybe I could I got my hopes up only to have them dashed again."

She swiped the tears from her eyes. "I had screwed up so many things in my life, maybe I knew I'd screw this up, too. Maybe that's why I couldn't tell anyone when I found out. I figured I'd mess up and everyone would just shake their heads."

"Of course not, Sweetie," Lily protested. "We love you. We would have supported you. Been there for you."

Ted and Tracy both nodded their agreement.

"I know. But I just hurt too much. I couldn't talk about it. I couldn't think about it. If I did, I would have fallen apart."

"And we would have helped you put yourself back together," Lily told her.

But Robin shook her head. "I just couldn't, Lil. It was easier to just keep it bottled up inside."

Lily suddenly sat up straight and looked over at her husband.

"So, why did you tell Marshall?" she asked, sounding slightly offended that he had been entrusted with a secret that had been kept from her.

Robin glanced over at the big man with a tight smile.

"I didn't tell him. He was there when it happened."

She had fallen asleep working on her plan to break the news to Barney. She still couldn't decide between the the maple leaf onsie or the tuxedo one. She woke with a gasp to a sharp pain across her abdomen. Biting her lip, she lay still for a few minutes, trying to convince herself that the pain had been her imagination, the remnant of a bad dream.

Slowly, she sat up, dangling her feet off the side of the bed and waited. After several more moments, she grabbed her phone off the bedside table and rose, slowly making her way across the floor to the bathroom door.

Just as she reached the threshold, another wave of pain hit, doubling her over. When it finally passed, she made her way to the toilet. She closed her eyes against the tears when she discovered the large blood spot in her underwear. Swallowing down her panic, she picked up the phone and placed a call to her doctor.

The nurse sounded sympathetic and instructed her to get someone to bring her in as soon as possible. She pulled up Lily's number and considered as she quickly pulled on loose fitting sweats. Her thumb hovered over the 'connect' button for a few seconds before she sighed and hit 'end' instead.

It was early. Lily would be busy with Marvin and Daisy. Robin knew that mornings at the Erickson household were hectic. Lily had enough to do, especially since she had mentioned Marshall having an early morning meeting at the courthouse.

She slowly made her way downstairs and hailed a cab. The pains continued at irregular intervals, some strong enough to take her breath away, some mere nuisances. But all, worrying.

During the cab ride, she closed her eyes, trying to relax. With a hand resting on her stomach, her mind alternated between trying to bargain with God and with the baby itself.

She made promises, offered deals, fearing all would be for naught.

Arriving at the clinic, she paid her fare and slid from the vehicle, taking a moment to steady herself. She looked up at the sign, knowing that standing there was only delaying the news they would give her, not change it, but she wasn't ready to hear it just yet.

"Robin?" a voice called.

She turned to see Marshall coming down the sidewalk towards her, a broad smile on his face. His morning meeting had gone very well and he had managed to wrap up his case in a very short time. Since he had planned to be there all day, he now had the day free, he explained to her, and he was heading home to surprise Lily and the kids.

"That's great," Robin told him, mentally trying to speed him on his way.

"You're not working today?" he asked, apparently not picking up her message.

She had called the station on her way in, telling them that she wasn't feeling well and would be taking the day off.

"No. I have a few things I needed to take care of," she told him.

Suddenly, another cramp hit and she doubled over, clutching at her stomach. Marshall stepped forward, catching her before she fell to the ground.

"Robin? What's wrong?" He wrapped an arm around her to keep her upright. "Do you need an ambulance?" His concern was evident.

She shook her head, pointing towards the clinic in front of them. Without another word, he scooped her up and headed to the door. A helpful bystander pulled it opened and he strode into the waiting area.

"Can I get some help here?" he called. "My friend needs a doctor now!"

The nurse behind the desk jumped up and motioned for him to follow her back to an exam room.

"What happened?" the nurse asked as she headed into an empty room, moving quickly to remove the detrius from the last exam and wipe down the table before pulling fresh paper over it.

"I don't know," he told her. "We were talking and she just doubled over in agony."

"Is she a patient of ours?"

Before he could answer, Robin nodded. "Robin Scherbatsky. I called earlier."

As Marshall moved to place her on the table, the nurse asked one more question.

"Are you pregnant?"

"No," Marshall said.

"Yes," she whispered softly. "But not for long, am I?" she asked the other woman.

The nurse spread a blanket over her and smiled in what was supposed to be a reassuring manner as she patted Robin's hand.

"Let's not jump to conclusions, Mrs. Scherbatsky. I'll get your chart and let the doctor know you're here, then be back to help you change." With a nod at Marshall, she exited the room, pulling the door closed behind her.

Pulling the blanket close around her, Robin rolled onto her side and curled into a fetal position. Marshall caught a glimpse of misery in her eyes before she squeezed them shut. Not sure what to say, he stepped close and rested a hand on her arm.

"You want me to call Barney?"

She shook her head. "He's in Korea. In meetings. He can't take calls."

"Lily? Or Tracy?"

Opening her eyes, she sat up and fixed her gaze on him. "No. I don't want to bother either of them."

"They're your friends, Robin. They'd want to be here for you."

"I'm fine, Marshall," she told him. "In fact, you don't need to stay. Go spend the day with your wife and kids."

At that moment, the door opened and the nurse re-entered the room, gown in hand. "Let me give you a hand getting changed, Ms. Scherbatsky,"she said, shaking out the gown.

"I'll just..." Marshall pointed towards the door.

"Thanks, Marshall," Robin told him.

He nodded, not sure how to respond.

"Please don't say anything to anyone,"she pleaded.

"Okay," he agreed reluctantly. "As long as you promise to call me," he added.

After a moment, she nodded agreement and he sidled out of the room. Standing in the hallway, he pulled out his phone. He knew he had promised, but he would certainly want to know if something was going on with his wife. He hit the button to call Barney, but disconnected when it went to voice mail.

He had seen the doctor enter Robin's room and started to head out, only to realize that he was still holding her purse. He was debating whether to wait or to leave it with the nurse when the door to her room opened and the nurse stepped out. When he stepped forward to catch her attention, she motioned him into the room.

"You can go back in with your wife," she told him. "I'll be back in a minute with the ultrasound." Before he could correct her, she was gone.

When he stepped back in the room, Robin looked up at him. "I figured you' d be needing this," he explained, holding up her purse.

"Yeah. Besides, it really doesn't match your outfit," she joked weakly as she wiped at the tears on her face.

Setting her purse in a chair, he grabbed up a box of tissue and held it out to her. While she dabbed at the moisture, the nurse came in with a technician pulling an ultrasound machine. Everyone watched in silence while she set up. When everything was ready, the technician looked at the doctor. At her nod, the nurse bared Robin's stomach and the technician went to work. After several minutes, she looked at the doctor, shaking her head slightly.

"No heartbeat," Robin commented dully.

"I'm sorry," the doctor told her as the tech started packing up and the nurse took a towel to wipe the gel from her stomach. "I'm afraid not."

Robin let her head drop back onto the pillow and closed her eyes. "Now what?"

"You wait," the doctor told her. "Go home. Rest. Your body will take care of things."

With a sympathetic smile, she followed the ultrasound technician out of the room. The nurse finished cleaning Robin and adjusted her gown and the blanket. "I'll get your paperwork together while you rest. After the doctor gives you the 'all clear' I'll go over everything with you and let you go home."

When she left, Marshall stepped over to the bed and took her hand.

"I'm so sorry, Robin."

"Thanks, Marshall," she whispered.

"You sure you don't want to call"

"No," she interrupted. "I don't want to call anyone. I don't want people fussing over me and you know Lily will."

He nodded. His wife was born to nurture and had a determination to take care of the people she cared about, whether they liked it or not.

"I need to deal with this in my own way, Marshall. I was just barely getting used to the idea of being..." She paused, unable to force the word out. "You know...and now I'm not."

Her gaze remained on her hands, nervously twisting at the blanket.

"Okay," he agreed. "I won't say anything. But I'm going to be taking you home."

Before she could protest, he reached over and stilled her hands. "That's the deal."

Finally, she nodded. Rather sluggishly, he thought. Her eyelids drooped.

"Robin?" He started rubbing her hand, surprised by how cold she felt. "Robin?" Her head lolled to one side and he jumped up and ran to the door, hollering for the nurse.

She hurried in, calling to her patient as she reached for her wrist. Looking concerned, she lifted the blanket and glanced underneath it, then dashed to the door.

"I need a doctor in here," she yelled. "She's hemorrhaging."

Moments later, the doctor reappeared. She also checked under the blanket and started barking orders. Marshall stepped back out of the way as a couple of young men rolled in with a gurney.

"Are you taking her to the hospital?" he finally questioned.

"We have a surgery center on the premises.," the nurse assured him. "She'll be fine."

She led him to the day surgery waiting room and told him that someone would let him know as soon as they knew something. Sure enough, a couple of hours later, she stepped into the room to tell him that Robin would be fine. They had stopped the bleeding and given her a transfusion. He could see her as soon as they got her settled in a room.

After another wait, he was shown to the room where she was resting. When he walked in, she opened her eyes and frowned at him.

"Why are you still here?" she asked.

"You don't think I'd leave, do you?"

"No, guess not," she replied. "But it looks like they're going to keep me overnight, so you can salvage the rest of your day with Lily and the kids."

She could read the indecision on his face. "Please, Marshall. I really want to be alone right now. I'll probably be sleeping most of the time anyway," she added, yawning for emphasis.

"Okay," he finally agreed, leaning over to hug her carefully. "But don't hesitate to call me if you need anything at all. Any time."

"I will," she assured him. "And remember, not a word about this to anyone."

"I don't understand, but I'll respect your wishes," he told her.

"That's all I ask."

And he did. Even though it meant fabricating another early morning meeting for the next day so that he could dash to her apartment. She had mentioned once always keeping a bag packed and ready to go in the front closet so that she was prepared no matter how little notice she had to dash off to cover a news story. He figured it would have a change of clothes and basic toiletries.

She looked surprised when he entered her hospital room as she pushed her breakfast around on the tray.

"I thought you might need some stuff," he told her, holding up the bag.

She smiled faintly. "Thanks. You didn't need to do that."

He shrugged. "No trouble. I remembered you mentioning your grab-and-go bag and it really wasn't out of my way to pick it up on my here."

"Why are you here?"

He gave her a puzzled look. "To take you home."

"I'm capable of getting home by myself," she told him

"I know, but then I'd be worrying and wouldn't be able to focus and Lily would be bugging me about what was wrong and I'd I'd end up having to tell her."

"I'm not even sure how long they're going to keep me," she protested.

"That's okay. I brought reading material," he told her, holding up his briefcase. Before she could formulate another protest, he added. "Don't you know better than to argue with a lawyer?"

With a shake of her head, she went back to her breakfast while he settled into a nearby chair and pulled out a sheaf of papers. As it turned out, the doctor arrived soon after and, after a quick review of her vitals, signed off on her release papers. The nurse went over her post release instructions and left her to dress.

After a stop by the pharmacy to pick up her medications, Marshall accompanied her back to her apartment and made sure she was comfortable before heading off to work.

"And that's why Marshall knows," she finished, looking over at the big man. "Did I ever thank you for all you did for me?"

"Several times," he told her.

She turned to Lily. "I'm really sorry that I forced him to not be honest with you," she told the redhead. "He was just respecting my request. Letting me deal with things in my own time and my own way."

"But you didn't deal with it," Lily commented, tucking a strand of Robin's hair behind her ear. "You bottled it up inside and pushed everyone away. You shut us all out. You shut Barney out."

"I know," she responded. "It was just was easier not to talk about it. The longer I kept it all buried, the safer that felt."

"Even when you saw what it was costing you? Your marriage? Your friends?" Lily questioned, her anger and frustration coming through. "None of that was worth opening yourself up for?"

"I'm sorry," Robin tried to explain. "It may sound stupid and simple to you, but it just wasn't so easy for me to admit how much pain I was in. To ask for help. I got belittled for that way too many times."

"You hurt us, Robin. You lost touch. You broke your promise."

"My promise?"

"To be there for the big things," Lily reminded her. "You stopped coming."

"I came when I could."

"Which wasn't often. You missed Marshall's swearing in. You missed Daisy winning the spelling bee. You missed our housewarming and the celebration we had when Tracy got the letter about her book being published."

"But I was here for your gallery opening, Lily. I was at the game when Marvin's basketball team won the state championships. I wasn't there for your housewarming, but I flew back when it burned down. I helped you find an apartment and get settled in. I saw Ted get that architecture award a few years ago. I was at the launch party when the book was released. Lily, there are 11 of you and only one of me. There was no possible way I could be here for every single event!"

"You weren't here when Ellie was born!"

"No, for some reason, I just couldn't be here for the birth of my ex-husbands child with another woman," Robin retorted.

"Or Violet!"

Robin bit her lip and looked down at her hands. "No, I wasn't. I'm sorry." After a long pause, she shook her head. "I just couldn't be there."

"I had a planned c-section, Robin. It's not like we didn't know exactly when she was arriving."

"I know. I had gotten the time off. I even had the plane tickets purchased, but when the time came, I just couldn't." She finally looked up, her gaze locking on Lily's, her eyes filled with misery.

Lily looked confused and shook her head. "I don't understand."

"The baby," Tracy whispered softly.

Robin nodded, still watching Lily, waiting for realization to dawn.

"Yours would have been due about that same time," Ted commented.

The red-head's eye widened as his statement sunk in. She reached over and pulled the other woman into an embrace. "Of course. That would have been sheer torture." Tracy leaned over, wrapping her arms around the other two.

Finally pulling back, all three women grabbed for tissues and wiped their faces.

"It hurt every time you weren't there, but that one hurt most," Lily confessed.

"I'm sorry. I came when I could. I just couldn't for that. And, like I said, with so many of you, it seemed like there was always something big happening. Besides..." She stopped and shook her head.

"What?" Tracy prompted.

"Nothing."

"Tell us," Lily encouraged.

Robin took a deep breath. "I assumed the 'being there' would work both ways."

"What's that supposed to mean? Is this about the kidnapping? We explained about what happened. I hate that we didn't know about what happened and couldn't be there for you. Someone would have found a way to get there."

"Yeah. Right."

"Spit it out, Robin. Where else did we fail you?" Lily's sarcasm was evident.

"That award," Marshall spoke.

"Really? That was halfway around the world, Robin. I know you offered to fly us all over there and put us up in a hotel, but do you have any idea of the logistics of traveling that far with kids? They had school and sports activities and trying to get off work can be such a hassle."

"I know," the reporter sighed.

"Was it a big award?" James asked.

"One of the biggest in journalism," she confirmed.

"It seems like WWN would have broadcasted one of its reporters receiving such a big award," he commented. "Or at least live streamed it."

There was silence as everyone looked everywhere but at Robin.

"Actually, I think they did," Ted finally admitted.

"But the time difference made it pretty inconvenient," Robin added.

"Yeah," Marshall stated. "Lots of stuff going on."

"So, what was this award for?" James questioned.

"She did a series on the lives of the general populace under the extremist regimes," Tracy piped up.

Robin brightened. "You watched it?"

"Yeah," Ted replied. "Well, Tracy did."

"Well, part of it anyway."

"Oh."

"The one about the women who were widowed or divorced by their husbands and left as outcasts with no means to support themselves or their children. The poverty level was heartbreaking, but your highlighting the situation has really made some changes for them."

"That's good.."

"We do have it stored on the dvr so we can watch it later," Ted contributed.

"Us, too," Marshall added.

Robin shrugged, studying her hands again. "Whatever. It's no big deal."

"Yes, it is," Lily argued. "It was a big deal. And we blew it."

"Hey. At least you sent the roses and scotch," she said.

Silence fell again as the rest of the gang looked at each other questioningly.

"No, we didn't," Marshall finally admitted.

"Barney," everyone voiced in unison.

"You're right," Tracy told Robin reaching for her hand. "We failed you. We expected you to be here for us, but we weren't there for you. Can you forgive us?"

"Don't worry about it," Robin answered, trying to laugh it off.

"But we will," Marshall told her. "You're important to us and we came up short."

"Please, give us another chance," Lily pleaded. "We promise we'll be here for you."

"I share the blame in all this. If I hadn't kept all this so secret, if I had kept the lines of communication open, we could have avoided so many hurt feelings." She looked around at her friends. "I need you all to forgive me, too."

"Done," Lily stated, wrapping her arms around her friend.

"Done," Tracy agreed, once more embracing the other two.

Marshall and Ted came up behind them, sandwiching the trio between them.

"Done," they said in unison.

The group hug was was broken by the sound of an alarm. The speaker suddenly crackled to life.

Code Blue. Cardiac unit to OR 1 STAT!. Code Blue. Cardiac unit to OR 1 STAT!

Robin's eyes went wide.

"Barney?"

Just a bit angsty, wasn't it? As always, thank you so much for reading. I appreciate your time and hope you feel it was well spent. I'd love to know what you thought. Pretty please?