Warnings: None.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Note: The line breaks mean some passage of time. Thank you for all the reviews and follows!
Many thanks to princesspomegranate who did the BETA work on this for me. Her stories are awesome and should be read as well.
"No, don't!" yelled Jane, jolting up from the bed.
The quick movement made her head swim and the room darken dangerously for a moment. She felt his strong hands steady her and his worried face faded back into view.
"Jane?"
"I'll be okay once the room stops moving," she muttered, holding her head, "Just don't smash breakfast. I might be hungry in a minute."
"You do not feel ill?" he asked, sounding hopeful.
"Not like I have been," Jane replied.
The room finally stopped moving and she could sit up without his help.
"I think I would like to try some food," she said as she looked over at the tray.
Loki stood and quickly retrieved the tray of food, bringing it back over to the bed. He placed it next to her and she was relieved that no nausea or gagging invaded her throat. As starving as she felt, she was far too wary to just start eating, so she took a brown roll and began nibbling on it. Her stomach turned uncomfortably but it didn't seem to want to reject the food.
"You go ahead and eat too. I don't want to over do it today," suggested Jane, gesturing towards the food.
"Eat what you can first," said Loki sitting down on the bed on the opposite side of the tray.
Jane's heart skittered at the memory of a day, some weeks ago, very similar to this, before she found out who he was.
"You know, you can sit closer," she murmured, her lips against the smooth surface of the bread and eyes cast down to the food.
He didn't move and suddenly she was ashamed for suggesting it.
"Never mi-"
He was behind her, right leg tucked up behind her and left leg pressed against the outside of her left leg. Jane yelped in surprise. She felt his chest rumble in a chuckle.
"I will sit as close as you wish me to," he said, his warm breath brushing her neck, sending shivers down her spine.
Jane felt her cheeks heat and quickly stuffed more bread in her mouth.
He stood close to her, as both of them gazed out the narrow window into the night sky.
"It sounds beautiful," she murmured, as he finished describing the realm she could see in the pink and purple nebula over the mountains in the distance, "Can we go there one day?"
Jane leaned back into his chest. She felt his body tense for just a moment before it faded and he slid his arms around her waist, resting his hands on her small baby bump. Her hand joined his and their fingers easily laced together. It was comforting to feel him against her.
"Yes, I will take you there," he replied, gently resting his chin on the top of her head.
Her heart skipped a beat.
She felt her mouth go dry and stomach twist in anxiety. Jane's tongue darted out to try and wet her lips, scolding herself at the same time for being so nervous. Shifting slightly in his arms, she looked up at him. His head tilted down and he quietly looked at her. Jane pushed up on her tiptoes and barely kissed his bottom lip. Loki's eyes snapped open, sucking in a sharp breath. Her teeth caught her bottom lip in worry as she quickly looked away, feeling ridiculously embarrassed.
The room spun. Jane was suddenly sitting on the small stone ledge of the window, level with his eyes. His bright eyes searched her face before settling on her lips. Her tongue darted out again, stomach flipping and heart fluttering. Loki stepped between her parted knees before leaning in and gently pressing his lips to hers. His hand cupped her cheek, gently tilting her head until his mouth fit to hers. Jane's arms wrapped around his neck and pulled him closer. A half-moan, half-sigh, fell from his lips as they barely parted, their lips still brushing each other's. Jane's eyes fluttered open to look at him.
He silently stared at her.
She felt his lips pull into a smile and the skin at the corners of his eyes crinkled.
Her heart leapt in her chest.
She smiled back.
His fingers lightly grazed the raised lines that arched across her stomach - protective runes, they had discovered from the books he could magically pull from the library - before laying his hand flat against her skin. A flutter of movement brought a smile to his lips, his face buried in Jane's sweet smelling long hair, pressing a kiss to the crown of her head.
"He moves more when we are touching," she said quietly, lying on her left side with him flush against her back.
"I can tell," he murmured back.
The pair laid together, quietly, in the darkness of the room having each finished their reading for the night and only wishing to touch and lay in the quiet warmth of their bond. Her hand eventually met his on her stomach and covered it, gently stroking the back of his hand with her thumb.
"Can you tell what the baby will be?" she asked, after a moment.
A sickening feeling shot through his stomach and stilled his hand on her skin.
"Jotun," he managed, his voice thick and muffled, "The child will be Jotun, there-"
"Well yeah, I know that," interrupted Jane, looking over her shoulder at him, "I mean you are Jotun and I am one now so it would only be natural. I was talking about gender. If there is a magical way you know the gender."
"Oh," Loki breathed, the knot in his stomach loosening a touch, "No. While I did study healing, pregnancy was not one of the topics that I was allowed to cover."
"Okay," she answered with a nod, sounding a bit disappointed before turning over onto her back, "Now, why did you sound upset when you said he would be Jotun?"
Loki let out a deep breath. Ruffling her hair, his lips pressed to her temple. She threaded the fingers of her left hand with his right, resting on the swell of her stomach.
"He?" he asked, attempting to deter her.
"It's a guess," she replied, shrugging one shoulder, "Now tell me, it's the Jotun thing again, isn't it?"
"As always," he huffed.
"I thought we were past this," she said quietly, "I thought you were okay with it."
"I will never be okay with it," Loki replied, wrinkling his nose, "I have… accepted that this is what I am. Very different."
"I need you to be okay with it though. For the sake of our child," she said, "I don't want him or her hating who they are."
"This is easy for you to say, you are Midgardian," he snapped, pulling away from her and leaving the bed, "You did not grow up with tales of the monsters."
"No, I didn't and yes I was born human but I am Jotun now," said Jane pushing herself up so that she was sitting, "I don't think either one of us are monsters."
"I believe you are forgetting what you told me not so long ago," Loki said before turning to the window.
Jane winced.
"That was not because you are Jotun," she insisted.
"But I did cause all of that because I am Jotun," he countered.
"Loki," sighed Jane, her head dropping down to look at their child.
The silence in the room felt near deafening.
"I had hoped, back before I knew," he began, staring out the window into the starry sky, "that my child – my children – would find a place in Asgard where I could not. As a Jotun, she will not find that place."
"She?" asked Jane, her voice betraying excitement.
"Just a guess," he replied, shrugging his shoulders and echoing her words.
"You said Odin could place a glamour on us," she pointed out, "He could–"
"People will know by now that I am Jotun," Loki put in, shaking his head, "Even if a glamour is placed on you before you are seen it will be known that our child has Jotun blood. She will not be accepted."
"Loki-" began Jane again.
"You see this as a beautiful, magical place Jane, and it is," he continued, "but the people–" he paused, looking down and shaking his head again "you do not see the flaws. The ugliness."
Jane sat quietly for several minutes before she carefully climbed out of bed and stepped over to him. She hesitated just a moment before wrapping her arms around his waist the best she could, given her stomach.
"I'm sorry," she whispered, pressing her lips into the hard planes of his back, "You have a lot more experience with all this than I do. We can go to Midgard, if you are allowed, and live there. No one will have to know anything about the Jotun except us and he or she can grow up like a normal child."
He snorted.
"Well, as normal as possible," she corrected, a smile quirking her lips, "But I do want you to know that you are not a monster and our child will not be one either. I –" she hesitated "I love you."
"You cannot – "
"I do. I do love you and our child," confessed Jane, her cheeks flushing and arms holding him tightly.
She heard him swallow hard before gently removing her arms from around him. Her heart sank and suddenly she felt very embarrassed for confessing that to him. She turned her face away as he turned to face her, but his fingertips lifted her chin until she was looking up into his eyes.
"Jane-" he murmured.
"Truly, I do," she whispered back.
He leaned in close, brushing his lips over hers before turning his head, pressing cheek to cheek.
"I love you as well."
Loki gazed out the narrow window into the moonlit and star-marked sky. Any day now, the seven months would be up and Thor would come for him. A worried expression passed over his face. He knew that a change in him could be seen. He was thinking clearly for the first time in centuries.
But
His fingers ran nervously over the smooth stone of the window ledge.
Would the change be believed?
The note that Thor left had said that there would be a point when he was too far gone for even a mate to bring back.
Loki's throat tightened.
He turned slightly to view Jane's sleeping form on the bed.
He had been almost gone when she came to him. His teeth had nearly ripped her throat out. But – thankfully – that hadn't happened and they were full and well bonded.
Loki turned and leaned up against the stone wall, crossing his arms over his bare chest, watching Jane as she quietly slept.
Truthfully, he did not know how he would react to Thor coming into the room with his mate. Just the thought made possessive protectiveness flash through his veins. He shook his head. Hopefully the intensity of those feelings would dissipate some once the child was born. She was a clever woman and would not take well to being hidden away. Though he had been able to ease the boredom by magically pulling books from the library and those he kept in the void, the amount of time that they had spent isolated in this room had worn on her.
No.
The child being born must fix this.
But for now, when Thor came, he would make her stay in the bathroom out of the way. He could not stomach the thought of harm coming to her when - if - he and Thor fought.
A warm and humid breeze blew through the narrow windows. Trepidation twisted his stomach painfully and his eyes darted out the window. The horizon was darker than the rest of the sky. The rolling clouds coming over the mountains were slowly extinguishing the stars. Lightning flashed deep in the clouds, lighting them up deep purple and blue. He caught the scent of crisp rain on the wind.
Loki swallowed hard.
Swiftly, he pushed away from the wall, arriving at the bed in two long strides and slipping in beside his mate.
"Loki?" she murmured, half-asleep.
"Shh, go back to sleep," he said quietly, pulling her as close as possible with her rounded stomach.
A deep breath blew out between her parted lips. Her small hand rested on his waist and forehead leaned into his collarbone. The quiet, steady breath of sleep quickly returned. The thick, heavy rumble of thunder came from a distance and rolled over the room.
His hand tightened against her back.
Lips pressed into her dark hair.
Thor was returning and if he could not convince him that he was no longer the threat that he once was then he would die.
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