Until It's Safe to Go 6
Trigger Warnings: Heavy descriptions of child abuse and neglect in the first portion of the chapter. They are not mentioned or alluded to more than vaguely thereafter. Chara also has PTSD, which is a consistent theme.
Chara foresaw issues with their plans. Asriel might have as well, but it was rather obvious he didn't care enough to reconsider and reformat his ideas. If he wasn't worried about the money it would take to buy the materials they wanted in secret, how to sneak away the recorder, how to record without being seen and questioned, or exactly how they'd bake a pie, they supposed they wouldn't be, either.
"Okay, you keep watch," their older brother instructed as they stood outside their parents' room. "If you hear one of them coming, you have to distract them until I can get out. I'll meet you outside as soon as possible, alright?"
"Are we going to be in trouble if we get caught?" Despite their sibling's confidence, the memories of unkind hands, harsh words, and hot flames danced in their memories and tainted the present with anxiety.
Asriel's soft, reassuring laughter made them feel better before he even spoke. "No, of course not! Dad would just say, 'Hey kiddos, if you're going to borrow something of your mother's or mine, be sure to ask!'"
To demonstrate Asgore's reigning kingly presence, he puffed out his chest and lowered his voice as if to imitate their father, and they both burst into a fit of giggles at the end. Now he placed one paw over the opposite wrist, his eyelids batting softly as he lifted his chest at an angle.
"And then Mom would be like, 'Oh, my children! Do be sure to be careful with the recorder, but please, have fun!'"
The fallen human let out a little snort as they continued to laugh quietly with their brother, their arms finding their way around him in a loose hug for support. The two children adored Asgore and Toriel as much as they adored each other, but they were two extremes of a dramatically royal spectrum, so it was impossible not to poke good-humored fun occasionally. Unfortunately, they were not as alone as they'd previously assumed.
"What is all this I hear?" Asgore's massive shadow was suddenly cast over them, but the smile on his face was gentle as he arched an eyebrow. "You two are going to borrow the recorder in secret and you're teasing your mother and I's personalities? I am hurt, truly."
Asriel dissolved into wild giggles now, his arms looking tiny as he wrapped them around his father the best he could, but the human child immediately clammed up. Back on the Surface, Attribe shared their distaste for their selective, superstitious mother, and the two of them would often try and foil her or embarrass her enough to make her avoid them. Occasionally they'd cross her wildly-fluctuating line that meant they'd gone too far, and her discipline was more unforgiving each time. Marks across their back and legs until they could barely stand. Hair ripped away from their scalp. Scratches down their arms, stomach and face. Permanent scars from the time she'd trust their hands in the fire, not Attribe's because he was seen in public more often.
"My child?" Their new father's voice was soft as he knelt down closer; he wanted to be at her level, but he was still humongous compared to his adopted child. "What is on your mind? I am not cross. It is alright to laugh; it was funny."
"N-no..." They fumbled weakly, their resolve and defenses dropping despite their best efforts to just laugh it off. "I...We shouldn't have been me-messing with things we shouldn't have. W-we'll keep away, I-I'll do...I'll do what you need done, just please...please don't punish me..."
Asgore's expression was as soft as it was the day they met, and his eyes were kind and steady enough to set their racing heart at slight ease. "Chara. I understand that life on the Surface was less kind than life down here, and much less forgiving. I understand that because I have seen firsthand what humans are capable of. But we are far from your kind now, and you are safe from those who harmed you for a long, long time now. It will take time to not be afraid, just as it took me many years to not be afraid the war would follow us down here. But it is over, and we will not leave until it's safe to go."
They couldn't help the tears from streaming down their permanently rosy cheeks as they threw their arms around his neck. Asriel immediately scooted closer to his father's head and them, his smaller arm securing across their back before the king enveloped them both in one of his famous cuddles. It was in these moments they felt capable of love, and truly dared to indulge in the thought that they could eventually repay all of the kindness and affection they'd received over the past months being with their new family.
Having one of Dad's famous cuddles fills me with determination.
It was a strange way of labeling this memory in their mind, but it seemed appropriate, so they decided to keep it.
Back in their village, they'd often watched the women sew and create quilts and clothes like there was nothing to it. Maybe they just weren't adherent enough to their biological sex, but it was impossible to patch a quilt.
"Any luck with that shirt?" They grunted as they were stabbed in the finger for what felt like the millionth time.
"Yeah!" Asriel, the poor creature, had his albino fur absolutely covered in paint and marker stains, but he was grinning wildly. "I think it just needs a few more doodles and it'll be ready!"
"Remind me why I'm subjecting myself to this torture?"
"Because we're gonna celebrate being a family!" He winked and resettled onto his stomach, lifting the sleeve of the shirt he was decorating for Asgore and beginning a new sketch. "And we need something for everyone!"
Something for everyone. They wanted to give something to Asriel, but not something as pain-inducing as a quilt or as childishly adorable as a shirt. They had no idea what, though, especially because they were rarely apart and therefore could hardly do anything in secret. Despite the circumstances, they had a very strong feeling he'd already managed to get them something, and that thought was doing a very good at setting them on edge. Their celebration was in five days, after all. How would their beloved brother react if he didn't get anything, or got something not meaningful?
"Ow!" They hissed, yanking the thread through the scraps once more. "At least Mom is worth it..."
They were just going to have to find other ways of obtaining the gift.
...
"This is an obscene hour for someone asyoung as you to be out. Does ole Fluffybuns know you're here?"
"That does not concern you. The point is that I need to buy something meaningful for Asriel, and I couldn't go to the Snowdin store because the monsters who run it are gossips."
"It does concern me." The older reptilian monster arched an eyebrow, which only agitated them and made them more anxious. "I've known Fluffybuns for years, and I'm indebted to him by lookin' after his kiddos."
They felt their breath hitch in their throat as disappointment settled in their stomach like a rock. That was it, then. This senile middle-aged monster wasn't going to help them, and was even going to try and get them in trouble with their adoptive father. Everything was ruined.
"But I understand," he continued suddenly with a wide grin. "Have ya a look around! I've got lots of junk to sell."
They sent a collective thanks to every higher force they could think of and began their search. He was right in saying most of it was junk; gloves with holes, ancient magic spells, cheap tourist food. The child was near giving up and trying to find something at least edible and tasty elsewhere before they finally found something that their tender hearted, sentimental sibling would love.
"Gerson," they began, but the shopkeeper's grim expression quickly made them correct themselves. "Mister Gerson. How much for this camera?"
"How much do ya got, Mini Fluff?"
Their rosy cheeks blossomed with a harsh blush at once. "4...45 gold."
"I'll take it for that, then. I'll even throw in this old picture frame since ya were so nice in calling me 'Mister'."
Maybe he wasn't so bad after all.
The day seemed familiar for some reason. April 8th was not a major holiday on the Surface nor Underground, but Asriel seemed absolutely insistent that was the day they were going to rejoice their all being together. When they walked into the den area that morning, it was decorated in various streamers and balloons; they were from all types of holidays due to the shortage of supplies Underground, but the gesture still surprised them. Their adopted family all stood together in front of them, smiles on their faces as Toriel held a cake in her hands. It had to be a cake, because there was white icing covering the top with letters written in pink.
Happy Anniversary, Chara!
"A-Anniversary?" They sputtered at once, the unfamiliarity of the situation and shock manifesting into mild panic. "W-what anniversary? I...I'm not married...It's not my birthday, I-I don't understand..."
"The anniversary of your falling down, my child," Toriel clarified soothingly. "It is one of the most special days of our lives, so we wanted to do something special to rejoice."
"B-but this is about our family, not me..." Their mind felt hazy now, their vision blurring with tears of distress. Had they been lied to by the monster they trusted the most? Had their efforts in buying and making presents been futile, just meant to be a distraction and nothing more?
"Of course it's about our family!" Asriel chirped, but his expression grew more gentle as he looked in their ruby eyes. "Hey...It's not just about you. It's because of you."
Because of them. Everything in their short life that related to them was negative except for Attribe, but even he died of a violent plague. Now their new family was celebrating their arrival, and insisting they were complete because of them. They couldn't understand. They just couldn't understand.
"B-but I'm not worth this..." They wrapped their arms around themselves, the tears now dripping down their cheeks. "I'm sorry...I'm a waste of time. If you needed to be complete, you could have just conceived again...You didn't need me for that. The only reason you took me in was pity for my situation, and because you're decent monster beings who didn't want a kid to find their way alone. Maybe...Maybe you did it for a political statement, because you guys are royal."
"My second child," Asgore said in a soft voice. "Why can you not accept it is simply because we love you?"
Love was an emotion they reserved for their lost brother. What they felt for Asriel and their parents was identical, but until this day, they hadn't been able to put that label on it. They loved them. They loved them more with every particle of their being, and would do anything to maintain what they'd received. They had to know how much their adopted child wanted that, and now was the perfect time.
"I-I love you guys..." They sputtered out through their heavy tears. "I do! I love you! I want t-to protect you! I...I got you and made you these gifts because I think you're all so wonderful! B-but I don't deserve this! I don't! Deserve! You! I'm horrible! I've done terrible things to people...I've never said 'I love you' to anybody but my dead brother before today! I've done nothing but bring you down with my crappy personality and my whiny needs...I'm sorry."
"I do not want to hear that kind of talk any longer." Toriel's voice was firm, but the passion in her words was clear to everyone. "You are our second child. It matters not that you are not related by blood or species. You are ours, and we are yours. You deserve the love you were deprived of for so long on the Surface. Nothing you have ever needed was a burden. We are happy to comply because you make us the happiest we have ever been. Losing you or your brother would destroy radiant lights in our lives, so please, do not speak as though you do not provide something much more meaningful than basic survival needs. We love you."
"Yeah!" Asriel agreed fiercely, his arms embracing them to his chest at once. "I've never had a sibling before and I wouldn't want any one that isn't you! You're my best friend!"
"Y-you're my best friend too," they whispered due to the tears they were shedding rapidly. "I love you. I love you. I love you..."
The family hug they all participated in filled them with determination.
...
The locket was gorgeous. The heart-shaped gold piece reflected against the light so much for it to not be brand new, and it complimented the green of their shirt beautifully. They hugged Asriel fiercely while mumbling their thanks and appreciations, but they refused to let any more tears fall. After all, they weren't a big crybaby like their brother.
"I will use this quilt every night, my child," Toriel decided as she opened up her gift. "It is beautiful. Thank you."
"I love this shirt!" Asgore laughed out immediately after, carefully pulling it on over his robes. "It's too special to wear all the time; besides, it would fade that way. I'll have to frame it!"
"Speaking of frames..." They pulled their camera out of the small bag they'd found to hide it in now, grinning shyly. "I got this and a new frame from Gerson a few days ago so we could have a family picture...That was going to be my gift to Azzy."
"That's perfect! We need an accurate picture now that you're here!" Their brother crowed immediately. "Come on, let's put it up on the shelf! We can set it on a timer so we'll all be in it!"
"I will do that," Toriel offered immediately, but when she was handed the camera, she squinted in confusion. "Oh...Perhaps not..."
They couldn't help but snort a little as both they and the males of the family laughed. "Don't worry, Mom, I've got it."
Once the timer was set for ten seconds, it was a mad rush to figure out a position, and it took a few tries to get one right. On what would be the final attempt, Toriel wrapped her arms around Asgore and hoisted her first born between the two of them in a group hug. Initially, Chara figured they were meant to just stand beside the group embrance, but their father lifted them from behind and secured them into the affection between his shoulder and their mother's upper body. For lack of time to readjust, they flashed a peace sign while throwing their arm around his neck.
"Oh, that's perfect!"
"I love it. It reflects our family perfect."
"I know just where I'm gonna put it!"
Perhaps April 8th was going to be a significant day from now on after all.
FILE SAVED: THE DAY.