Author's Note: Longer than the last chapter. By the way if anyone has any suggestions feel free to mention them and if I use them you of course get credit. This is meant to be a fun story, random as hell and of course unrealistic since people don't change bodies. Pardon typos. I like dialog so hopefully people think its in character.
"Rachel..." the voice cracked and Quinn cursed under her breathe. Of course it would crack, it wasn't her voice, but she cleared her throat anyway and tried again. The name came out a little clearer but still lacked any confidence. The name wasn't spoken loudly, Quinn didn't think yelling would be appropriate and she admitted she had yelled at Rachel Berry enough during high school.
Latching the loft door shut behind her and turned around just in time to catch Rachel less than five inches away from her.
"Jesus Christ!" Quinn almost yelled, her heart rate increasing as she looked at the commanding figure in front of her. Even after college Rachel still managed to be a bit intimidating. Okay, who was she kidding? A lot intimidating. Might as well start with the honesty somewhere.
"I'm Jewish," Rachel said with a frown, without missing a beat.
"I'm not," Quinn replied with a shrug.
"Yes you are, you said your father is very religious," the brunette said factually but didn't miss the flinch from Charlie and added, "but you said you're Jewish so you couldn't be like him, a sort of rebellion, if you will."
"I'm not really any religion," She mumbled, her headache building. Rachel stood there, now with her arms across her chest, looking more confused. Quinn sighed, she felt exhausted. "Jesus Christ, Moses, Budda all hanging out. Better?" The former girl tried an attempt at humor.
"No, let's start with your fall. Did you see a doctor after? Tests should have been done, they could explain this change in behavior."
Quinn closed blue eyes tightly and wished that she could be back in her body. This conversation was one she had been dreading. It wasn't rational and with the headache building she had no desire to stand and be yelled at. Not that Rachel was yelling, she was calm and collected, but she didn't want to see if her diva storm outs were still present. When she opened her eyes Rachel was still staring at her.
"Skip over the fall. You said I walk differently, talk differently, sleep differently and even kiss differently. Can you explain that?" She pleaded. "Everything has changed," she said in a tone that didn't warrant an argument.
"What are you saying?" she asked in confusion.
"I'm saying…I'm not who you think I am..I'm not your friend, I'm not your boyfriend." Quinn finished. She just continued to stare at me.
"Q…"she said finally, looking away to the side. Quinn nodded slowly. "Sam…always calls you Q." Rachel continued aloud, more to herself. The former cheerleader nodded again and this time Rachel looked at Quinn. "What is going on," she asked growing annoyed.
"I honestly don't know. I remember…getting a headache…trying to walk out of the coffee shop and then I fainted. When I woke up I was in…Charlie's body..and I'm freaking you out," she finished softly as Rachel took a small step away from her. "I'll go…Sam can fill you in with anything if you want to talk to her." Quinn said as she made her way to the bedroom. Now was her chance to go back to her apartment. She didn't want to bother Santana and Brittany anymore, there was a perfectly nice apartment, her apartment that was empty; one she could escape to.
"Wait," the singer said in a rush, grabbing Charlie's wrist. Quinn stopped, Rachel's small hand made Quinn's wrist burn. "If you're in…his body…where's Leo?" she asked frowning again.
"I'd assume…in my body. That's why I'm always here…if he comes back…I can stop him, talk to him or something," She said trailing off and then moved her wrist so Rachel would let go and continued to walk to the bedroom again. Anger was starting to build. Of all the things to ask Rachel was worried about her loser boyfriend, not the person who was in the room with her now, about to go insane with the entire situation. A few seconds in the bedroom she gathered a pair of jeans, a shirt, a sweater and put them in a bag, rushed and not bothering to fold them, anger and resentment making her not care. As she packed she felt Rachel behind her. She doesn't say anything but glanced at Charlie, then at the art on the wall.
"This is why you bought this, it makes sense," she said under her breath. Quinn nodded and left the room, careful to not touch Rachel on the way. She put on a pair of shoes that looked fit for a business meeting she had bought while on a shopping spree with Santana. "You don't have to leave, we can figure this out," she said quickly.
"Really? What's there to figure out? If he had wanted to have his life back he would have been here by now, but he's not, so now I'm stuck here in this body and I'm sure mine's by the side of the road in a ditch somewhere, which makes me trapped," She said raising her voice, and rolled her head around, cracking her neck as the headache grew. On instinct Quinn reached out and clutched the wall for a minute trying to catch her breath. She could feel Rachel's intense gaze on her and then felt a wave of coldness hit her body, followed by a wave of heat settling over, coating her, making her feel suffocated.
Breathing was taxing, Quinn felt panic clamp on her mind until a cool hand was against the side of her face. "You're sick. You need to lie down," in a warm tone, but Quinn shook her head, she wanted out of there, she needed...
"No, I need to get out of here and go home. I can't be here," she said as she grasped the door handle, but Rachel's hand gently covered over Charlie's and said, "let me take care of you and then you can leave, you don't need to go falling down the stairs."
And that tone held so many layers, Rachel cared. She was giving Quinn an easy way out and options. Blue eyes looked at her and Quinn saw the sincerity. She saw her point and let go of the handle to lean against the door trying to breath deeply. She felt light headed and as she took a step towards the bedroom, her knees giving out and she bent towards the floor.
For a split second there was embarrasment but Rachel caught her half way as Quinn fell, but she quickly shifted so Rachel would fall on top of her. Accidently hitting her stomach was an unavoidable side effect and instead of making the smaller girl feel guilty Quinn turned her head to cover up the pain.
"Are you okay? Oh god," she asked, frantic.
"I'm fine," Quinn lied and knew Rachel could tell since she hadn't put much effort into it.
"You're burning up," she said, "do you want to lie down?" The words were offered kindly but Quinn shook her head.
"No…I want to take a shower, it always helps," she said slowly.
"This happens often?" she asked growing scared.
"Sometimes…but not this bad," she said to the floor, her face still tilted but softly removed Rachel from her body. Pushing herself up in a half push up she felt the muscles strain. Rachel was up and tried to help her to her feet as well and then slungs my arm around Charlie's waist as she opened the bathroom door after they had taken a few steps together. Her head felt like it was twenty pounds and so Quinn leaned against the bathroom wall as Rachel started to take off her sweater. Closing her eyes was so easy but she didn't want to open them. It was a pathetic attempt to make the pain in her head go away and the nausea of her stomach that sometimes came with it. Small hands kept moving over Charlie's body and Quinn realized Rachel was about to take off the t-shirt when her hand grasped Rachel's tan ones.
"Stop," she whispered with eyes still closed.
"You need to take a shower, you said you wanted to take a shower," she replied in a commanding tone but still managed to be soft. Quinn's body relaxed and she let her take of the shirt. Warm hands slidding up her sides. If she didn't feel knotted in the stomach she would have acknowledged that it tickled. Once it was off Rachel moved forward, arms wrapping around shoulders in a hug me and Quinn was surprised by the action, completely thrown as her arms stayed off to the side and said in a dull tone, "I'm not your boyfriend."
She pulled away but didn't say anything for a brief second and then meet Charlie's eyes and said, "your heart is beating too fast."
A dry chuckle escaped Quinn's throat. In annoyance she replied "lucky me…if I'm stuck in this body at least it won't be long if it's killing me,"she finished and stared at the ground. Rachel just shook her head, out of pity or irritation Quinn couldn't tell as she started to undue the button to the pants. Quickly Quinn moved away from her.
"Woah, I can handle this," she said as her voice rose, "I've undressed myself and taken showers before," she continued, trying to joke, an attempt to make the situation less awkward as the foreigh hands and arms started to shake.
"Stop joking, you're shaking, and this isn't helping anything," she said raising her voice a little.
"I'm fine," Quinn tried again to be convincing in a more controlled tone but lacked conviction.
"No, you can barely stand," she said growing exasperated. "This is ridiculous and stupid," she amost spat out. And then she does something unexpected. Quinn watched with widened eyes as Rachel took off her shirt and stood in a black tank top and small shorts. She moved gracefully and turned on the water. Quinn's brain halted, misfired and crashed a little as she stared at her, eyes going wide. Again Rachel moved her hands closer to the shaking figure to try to help undressing. Quinn turned away abruptly, head spinning for a brief moment in response.
"Just let me do it," she said with her back turned to her. Rachel waited patiently but Quinn could feel the smaller girl's tension. "You don't have to be here," she told her gently.
"Do you want me to leave?" she asked matching the calm tone. Quinn thought it over. I could pass out or I may not but either way I shouldn't be here with his girlfriend. Against her will she took off the pants slowly, realizing she needed to take a shower and relax or the headache was going to get worse. Once the pants were removed and she was left standing in the the boxer briefs she got with an owl on it and noticed the small smile on Rachel's lips.
"I shouldn't be here with you," she said as she wrapped her arms around her midsection while the shaking continued.
"Because you're not my boyfriend?" she asked seriously.
"It's complicated," Quinn admitted as she looked at Rachel who seemed perfectly fine, she wasn't shaking and a light sheen of mist or sweat was forming on her upper chest, but Quinn noticed she glistened and almost cursed Santana that she was right.
"Then say what you're thinking," she said in a demanding tone though still managed to be soft.
"Can I just take a shower?" Quinn asked, shift her weight from one foot to the other. Rachel slowly moved out of the way allowing Quinn to slid the door open and get in. For a few seconds she stoof there and let the water relax the muscles and relished in the calming sounds of flowing water to break apart the pain. She didn't hear when the door opened again or feel Rachel stand in front of her until Rachel hesitantly placed a hand on Charlie's shoulder.
When the pained girl opened her eyes she immediatly stepped back a little. There were too many thoughts, just building and pounding in her head. One of them being that Rachel looked cold suddenly as she stood away from the warm; cold and vulnerable. Against her better judgement Quinn took a step closer to her and held out her hands a little, barely away from her body, but it was an offering nonetheless. The singer slowly moved towards her, still with hesitation. This was straining for both of them, it couldn't be anymore obvious they were both weary and second guessing eachother if trust was earned, if they should reach out to one another. Quinn made her decision as she gently embraced her. Rachel moved into Charlie to do the same. It was just a hold, but Quinn felt comforted, something settled inside her, and with a sigh, a release of tension she felt Rachel squeeze her tighter to stop her from shaking.
"I'm sorry," Quinn finally said in a whisper as they both moved their bodies a little more so they fit together better.
"For what?" she asked, lifting her head, her lips close to Charlie's jaw making Quinn pause, hesitating with her answer.
"For not being who you want," she finally got out, loosening her grip around a small waist as she exclaimed what she wanted to when they were in high school. There was always that voice in the back of her saying Rachel didn't deserve the torment, that it was void of reason and if she was less of a coward she would treat Rachel with respect, become her friend and treat her how she wanted Finn or Jessie or Puck to treat her.
"You're making this complicated," she replied point blankly.
"No, I'm not…" she said trailing off as her stomach felt another wave of pain rush through it making her knees give out, causing her to crouch down. Thank god or the devil-Sue Sylvester for teaching her how to fall as her hands caught her, but Quinn instinctively wrapped her hands around her knees. There was no desire to stand up again so she remained kneeling. Rachel at that point had let go and kneeled directly in front of her, as though an adult would a child, though it was without any condescention.
"Q," she said softly, "say what you mean," she pleaded. Quinn wanted to, god in hell did she want to but the headache started to come back just as it was beginning to fade away.
"I…like being with you and you…kissed me…I don't have a right…to be with you…if my girlfriend was..." she said unable to finish it as her head got a small lightning storm of pain, it was more akin to a small jab that radiated out and she clench her eyes closed, pinched in between my nose and then look down at the water. A small trace of blood was running down towards the drain. Quinn looked up to see if Rachel was hurt but fear and worry stared back, as she places a hand over her mouth. "What?" Quinn asked.
"Your nose," she said as she rested her hand near Quinn's temple. The former blonde reached up to her nose and pulled back my hand to see a little bit of redness on the fingertops that became pink as the water hit it, only to see it mingle with the water until it isn't there anymore as though it was never there, just an allusion.
"Oh," she said out loud, "that's new" she finished in shock as she leaned her head back, feeling the pressure was too much with her head bent before. Again she closed blue eyes and felt the water hit her face followed by soft fingertips moving gently and smoothly rubbing away the water and blood beneath her nose. Her fingers lingering over Charlie's lips as she brushed away the blood. "Please stop," Quinn just above a whisper. A part of her didn't want Rachel to stop, another part wanted her words to be drowned out by the shower, but when Rachel kept her hand roaming over Charlie's features Quinn moved the small hand away and started to get up, using the wall for support.
"Q," she said with alarm as she gripped Charlie's arm.
"Quinn, that's what the Q is for," she said with barely opened eyes, looking at Rachel through slits to see her face. "This is another...fact that makes it..complicated," she added as the headache started to numb itself again. The light wasn't bothering her as much but she closed her eyes after Rachel hadn't said anything or hit her, something Quinn was expecting, but Rachel didn't do anything.
While her eyes were closed she noticed her body felt better and had stopped shaking, the pain had vanished completely and she could tell her nose had stopped bleeding. To her surprise Rachel put her hands and arms gently on broad shoulders and pulled Quinn closer to her, resting her head on the bare shoulder since she was slouched down. Tense arms were out to her sides, making sure not to touch her after Quinn had gotten over the shock of Rachel leaning in further. If she had thought about it she shouldn't have been shocked. This was Rachel Berry, accepting, eccentric girl that she was, she wasn't about to push someone away...Quinn had been horrible to her throughout high school and Rachel hadn't pushed her away then.
"How is it complicated…besides the body switch?" she asked slowly, trying to wrap her head around it. "You're a guy, right? Quinn is a guy's name...though I knew one female Quinn...," the smaller woman trailed off, lost in thoughts. Quinn looked down at the floor for a brief moment and then focused on the wall. She had to admit she liked being with Rachel, she didn't mind the kissing, though it was very brief, but she knew she should mind and on some she did because it wasn't right or fair.
Then she drifted to self-depricating thoughts-I'm unhappy, I'm sure Rachel's unhappy, freaking Charlie hasn't come to the coffee shop and it's been open for a few weeks, my body could be in a morgue without my knowing and she asks how is it complicated.
The former girl hadn't spoken quickly enough it seemed because Rachel looked up at her expecting an answer and then shivered a little. The water had become cold she finally realized and slowly turned the singer around, away from the stream of water to turn it off.
"Would you mind if we…stepped out to get warm," she asked slowly. Rachel nodded and stepped out, leaving Quinn to follow. Almost grumbling she picked up her clothes and threw them into the bedroom just as she grabbed a towel and wrapped it around Rachel's shoulders and grabbed another to wrap around her own waist, still feeling strange that it wasn't around her body higher up.
Quinn smiled crookedly at her, more in embarrassment of being in a towel in front Rachel who gave a small smile back. As a distraction and another hold off of the conversation she picked up their clothes and headed to the bedroom, stopping before the black framed mirror she had hung in the small hallway to see if her nose was bleeding without her knowledge. It wasn't but she glared back at the reflection, noticing the stubble that was forming on the jaw line and chin.
While she was looking the reflection over Rachel went into the bedroom to change into some dry clothes. "What color are your eyes? They're the window to the soul," Rachel said calmly, though her voice carried over the distance.
"Depends on my mood," she admitted.
"Can't you ever give a straight answer?" She heard Rachel groan, her natural projection reaching her from across the room.
"Hazel." Quinn said finally offered with a disconnected tone as she looked at blue eyes. They were nice, a light shade, almost grey, but they weren't hers and somewhere in her heart she knew Rachel was right. They were the windows to the soul. Its why Quinn failed to look at Rachel's eyes when she insulted her, knowing there would be tears or an indication that she had caused her damage.
The smaller woman came back wearing another one of Charlie's sweaters resulting in a frown from Quinn once Rachel stood to the side of her, examining her without any break from her gaze.
"I didn't pack a lot of clothes," she said nonchalantly. Quinn nodded in response, not knowing what to say until her brain caught up.
"If you want we could go shopping or if you feel more comfortable you could go with someone else," She offered and Rachel's eyebrows rose in obvious disbelief.
"You'd like to go shopping with me?" Her frown deepened as she looked at Quinn who finally responded without thinking.
"I am a girl, I can handle shopping," She said somewhat defensively.
"You're a girl? And your name's Quinn?" her eyes widened. And Quinn could swear she could hear Rachel's brain working, the gears clicking into place.
"Middle name," she whispered, knowing it would be the first nail in the coffin as she watched Rachel's eyes enlarge.
"First name?" Rachel asked in a similar tone, voice hushed, both already knowing the answer.
Quinn gulped, it went against her nature to be so forthcoming about information, giving away anything that told about herself. She had overheard Finn say that she played her emotions close to the chest, her ex, very brief girlfriend said she was fed up with how Quinn would always be a damn mystery, her words, not Quinn's.
"Lucy," she mumbled, hating the name, how it was someone else, a person who studdered, had bad skin, was overweight, was at the bottom and the focus of torment, an easy scapegoat for people to feel better about themselves as they probably thought-at least I'm not that girl.
Silence, hard, painful silence. A trait that didn't come with Rachel Berry who took five minutes to explain something that would have taken most thrity seconds. But she was thankful Rachel hadn't run out of the apartment. She just stood there with narrowed eyes, observing Quinn. "Not going to ask my last name?" Quinn asked, breaking the eye contact.
Rachel scoffed, sounding offended. "Why would I have to? Fabray. Quinn freaking Fabray!" She shouted as she got up and moved away from the former girl. Rachel acted like she had just been burned or slapped in the face. Quinn had almost smiled feeling deja vu since weeks ago she had screamed in her head Charlie freaking Fabray, how being a Fabray wasn't all it was cracked up to be, how even after his death her father caused her problems. But instead she flinched from Rachel's words and the rejection she felt.
"Told you it was complicated," she said to the empty room as the bedroom door slammed shut. A flinch crossed over her again as she thought well she still does her diva storm outs...at least that's familiar.