Llama #2: Fine day... Sunday.

Disclaimer:

Frank is awkward,

That much is true,

But we don't own him,

So please don't sue.

6:

Stranger Danger

Frank was just getting some milk. That's all. Then he was molested by some strange old man. It could have been some god in disguise, or it could have just been a really pedo-ish man. Either way, he was probably going to have nightmares.

He was minding his own business, you know? He went to the nearest store, got some Homo milk, and headed back home. Left foot in front of the right, he walked along a trail, avoiding certain indentations and rocks so his clumsiness wouldn't cause him to trip and fall.

A couple more minutes and he'd be back in his snug little cottage with Hazel. But he felt his back tingle and he shuddered. Someone was watching him. Years of being a demigod had prepared him for this, but to his surprised he wasn't being stalked by a monster, rather an old man.

He was wearing a grey fedora with a thick black band around it. He was wearing the classic beige Khakis and old man sweater with a plaid shirt tucked in. Frank hated to admit that he looked pretty spiffy.

Hazel was rubbing off on him.

He gave the man a short glance and walked away, pretending that he didn't see anything out of the ordinary or that in no way, no how was that a monster disguised as an old man who's going to kill him.

Frank had a reason to be paranoid, okay? When your whole life basically depended on a freaking stick, it was okay to be paranoid.

When the old man caught up to him again, Frank really wished he had a super cool pen-sword right about then. He figured it would be strange if there was a giant elephant walking around , trying to tackle/crush an elderly man.

He'd prefer not waking up in a zoo then trying to explain himself. And he definitely does not want to call Hazel up and tell her to pick him up at the zoo out of all places. He didn't want Hazel to pick him up period. She wasn't that good of a driver...

The old man got a little bit to close again. This time, he spoke. "Excuse me, do you know where Maple Street is?"

Frank looked around like he was trying to find it himself. "Uh," he said, "you go straight then turn at the traffic lights, then turn right again. It should be on your left."

"Thank you," the old man said. He did something Frank wouldn't have expected. He grabbed Frank's hand then stroked his face like he was petting a kitten. "Thank you..."

And then his hand left his face and moved to his shoulder, he shoved Frank with all his little old man strength. Frank fell. He landed face first in the bush, and he looked up in time to see the old man hobble off, most likely in the direction of Maple Street.

What the heck just happened?

Frank shook his head and sighed. Of course, thing like this would only happen to him. Hey, at least he didn't steal his wallet or something, right? Frank got out of the bush, brushing off stray leaves and bugs off of his shirt. He saw a piece of paper on the ground.

Thanks for the milk, I really needed it.

FML For the Chapter:

Today, I was walking home when an old guy came up to me asking for directions. After I pointed him in the right direction, he held my hand, stroked my face then pushed me into a bush. FML

Llama #2: Beware of old people you guys. And big white vans.

Llama #1: And drug dealers who sing randomly on the road at night... CURSE YOU MICHEAL THE DRUG DEALER!

Llama #2: wat.

The llamas bid you adieu and remind you to review.