OMG! I can't believe how long it has been since I last wrote anything. But I just got a sudden muse today and I really couldn't help it. I had fun writing this. I hope all of you have fun as well. And please do forgive me for not updating for SOOOOO long. I love all my readers. Please review!

It's shout out time! This chapter's shout out goes to: Sepsis, serenbach, Little Patch of Heaven, .stutter, Aveira, Alice001, Beechiki, and TionneDawnstar. You guys are the coolest reviewers ever. Love ya!

Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me. They belong to whomever they belong to. Now on with the story.

Summary: Not exactly a Yuffentine, just a bit suggestive. But it certainly has them in it, and I think the situation is a lot of fun. Tifa eavesdrop on a conversation between Yuffie and Vincent, with disastrous results.

Italics- Yuffie (This applies during their conversation)

Normal- Vincent (This applies during their conversation)

Endless Moments: Eavesdropper

By Snipergal7

Rating: K+

Saturday mornings were not Tifa Lockhart's favorite. Those mornings were usually the most hectic of the week. In between taking care of the kids, who were free from school; prepping up the bar for its noon opening, buying groceries and cleaning the rest of the house; Saturdays were always bound to be a messy affair. This Saturday morning was no different.

After getting up at an ungodly hour, and grumpily noticing that the kids were already up, she had prepared a big breakfast, taking into consideration the few member's of AVALANCHE that were currently visiting. That done, she changed her clothes and went to the local market to take care of the groceries. After dealing with the extremely long and snail-paced lines, she had finally returned to the bar and had gotten to the grueling task of putting the groceries away. Once that was done, she managed to get to the cleaning. And it was during her tackling of the second floor that Tifa's Saturday morning took a turn for the surreal and just plainly bizarre.

"Ah Gawd, I'm so excited I can barely breathe!"

Tifa stopped dead in her tracks with a mop in one hand and a bucket full of water on the other one as she passed Vincent's door. Suffice to say she was rather startled to hear a female voice coming from said gunman's room. After all, this was Vincent. Not only that, but the words were rather…suggestive.

"Well, what are you waiting for? Take it off!"

A small gasp escaped Tifa's pretty lips. That voice! She knew that voice. 'Yuffie?' she thought confusedly. What was she up to in there? And who was she in there with?

"Have patience Yuffie. This will take some time."

Oh my God! That was Vincent. What were they doing in there? She knew she shouldn't, but she simply could not walk away. If she did, the curiosity would drive her insane. She had definitely been spending too much time with Yuffie. Trying to be her quietest, she slightly moved closer to Vincent's door and put her ear to it.

"I don't want to wait, Vinnie. I want it now! Do it!"

Tifa could feel her face gradually warming up as the conversation between the two continued, oblivious of the snooper on the other side of the door.

"There, it's out."

Tifa jumped a little at the gasp that escaped Yuffie's mouth as she saw whatever it was that Vincent had just taken out.

"Whoa. I didn't know it was going to be that big."

"Well, you should've thought of that before."

It was safe to say that by now Tifa's face was sporting a shade of red similar to that of a boiled lobster. She quietly put the mop and bucket down and stepped even closer to the door. She was certain she was hearing wrong.

"Well…put it in already!"

"I would if you could hold still for five seconds"

'I am not hearing this. I am not hearing this'. She wanted to get away, she really did, but the feeling she was having was that similar to what you felt when you watched a train wreck. You didn't want to, but still, you just couldn't stop watching.

"It won't go in. I think it's too big."

"Just hammer it in or something."

"I can't."

"What if I stand like this. Can you get it in?"

"Let me see… (Grunt) There, it's in"

"Oww!"

"Sorry Yuffie."

"Hmm…I don't like it like that. Let's try another position. Take it out." (Bedsprings)

"I can't."

"What do you mean you can't?"

"It's stuck."

"What the hell do you mean it's stuck? Take it out!"

"I told you it was too big."

Tifa could feel the heat of her embarrassment spreading from the roots of her hair all the way down to the tip of her toes. Her face was flushed and red, and if someone were to look at her face, they would be thoroughly startled by her "knock me over with a feather" look.

"Just pull it out already!"

"I can't. I will break it."

'Oh goodness! I really hope I don't have to call an ambulance!' Tifa was unsure of what to do. They certainly sounded like they needed some assistance, but she was so embarrassingly petrified at what she might find in there, she had no idea what to do.

"Well, we can't just leave it like that. Try moving it around a little bit."

"If I do that, it's going to squirt all over the floor."

"Well better the floor that in there!"

"Fine." (Grunt)

(Gasp) "Argh! Vincent, you squirted me! Now I'm all wet and sticky!"

Tifa made a mad dash to the bathroom holding a hand to her nose in order to keep the blood that had spurted from it from staining the floor, her mop and bucket forgotten.

She should've had never listened to that conversation. She would be permanently scarred. She would never be able to look at her friends to the eye, ever again. Why, oh why had she stared at that stupid train wreck? God, how she hated Saturday mornings!

Back in Vincent's room, it would be two more hours before they were finally able to assemble Yuffie's brand new Monster Water Gun, equipped with and adjustable target finder and the all new slime ball thrower.

I really hope you enjoyed this. I will try to update again soon. I really hope to. In the mean time, please review and let me know if you liked this. Reviews are my fuel, and I don't get any, I won't be inspired to write. Love you all. God Bless!