The look in April's eyes as Jay carried her to his bedroom fascinated him so much that he nearly walked into a wall. If this was what Tama saw, no wonder he thought she wanted this. Maybe he was right.
He set her down carefully on the bed. When she started to sit up, he shook his head. She settled back down immediately, gaze still steady on him. "I know what you like. You told me. Anything you want."
"Anything?"
She looked a little tense, but nodded.
"Good." He peeled his shirt off and tossed it aside, then sat beside her. "I want you to touch me."
The moment of startle reflex was something he'd seen from her a lot, usually when she'd touched him inadvertently. "Is that really so awful that it makes you cringe?"
"What? No. Oh god, no. It's just - "
"Shh. I know. But this time I told you to do it. So it can't possibly be the wrong thing to do, can it?"
No hesitation this time, none at all. Her fingers were skittery on him at first, jumpy, but she settled down quickly. He fought to not hold his breath. It felt good, better than he'd been imagining it, even.
Lying down, she could only reach up to his shoulders. Her hands lingered there. "I give a pretty good massage. If you want..."
"I'll keep that in mind. Right now, this is what I want."
"I can't reach any higher."
"Then try lower."
Her hesitation was different this time; he could almost taste the difference of it. Not fear, just working up her nerve. The anticipation - would she take the direct approach, or go shy on him? - was almost unbearable.
In the end, he thought it was simply a matter of her knowing what he wanted, and doing it because she knew. Beyond that, he lost all ability to keep analyzing her motives the moment her fingers found him - stroking, tracing the shape through his jeans, squeezing gently. He bit back most of the groan that rose to his lips when she did that, but enough got away that she heard.
"You like it?"
This time he didn't even try to hide the groan. "Fuck, yes."
"Let me do more?"
"What did you have in mind?"
Her hand didn't stop or even hesitate, but he could see a fretful look cross her face. And it finally clicked: She'd had it ground into her to do what he wanted, and she wasn't past where she needed him to tell her what to do, especially in this. "Stop a moment."
She did immediately. He regretted that bitterly for a second, but there was better to come in exchange for depriving himself. He skinned off his jeans and underwear in a tangle, threw the bundle in the direction his shirt had gone, and stretched out beside her. "All right, then - show me what this more you have in mind is."
She hesitated at that, too, but apparently it was enough of an order. It took her three tries to get him all the way down her throat, but once she did, it was the last problem she had with doing it.
The thought skittered across his mind: It's backwards, me naked and her still full-dressed. But that didn't really matter to him right now. Not nearly as much as warm and wet and tight sliding along the length of him. He felt more than heard her moans as she worked on him; they felt good, too, and they certainly sounded like she liked it.
"Faster." She obeyed instantly. He wasn't sure what felt better - the new rhythm or her obedience. He hated to face up to it, but he had to; no matter what the causes of it were, no matter how horrible they were, her clear desire - need, really - to be given orders was making him hard enough to punch through concrete. A whole new kink kept repeating in his head. To the tune of that song from fucking Aladdin. And even that wasn't cooling him off.
This way first, then. The rest later. Whenever I want it. However I want it. He didn't think it was going to take him very long to be ready again. If she was planning to sleep much tonight, he had a surprise for her.
She paused just long enough to whisper a single word: "Where?" It nearly pushed him over the edge then and there.
"Swallow it. Drink it all."
She did. He felt like every nerve ending in him was on fire in the best possible way. He'd been having dreams like this, almost from the first night. They'd always ended before this, though, before she curled up against his leg, head resting on his thigh, fingers tickling and toying with him.
"I need a bit longer than that. Come here." He considered. "Take your clothes off. Then come here."
She did as he said. There was no strip-tease to it, but then, he hadn't told her to do one. He still enjoyed watching.
When she came back, he turned her and pulled her back against him. He could feel reluctance in every fiber of her, but she let him do as he wanted. "I told you, remember? Relax."
She didn't entirely, but he knew what to do about that. The idea at first was to not let her cool off completely, and this position gave him all kinds of access to her. It wasn't long before she was moving against his hand, wherever he touched her. He focused on her thighs, stroking them open.
"Jay, please..."
Even though he'd told her it was okay, she rarely addressed him by his name, to the point where she'd go and find him rather than call out to him from another room. It said a lot about the state she was in that she was doing it now. It was changing his state, too. Damn, just look at what you do to me.
It was at that moment it occurred to him: She should know. He moved back and turned her onto her stomach. She made a single soft, protesting sound, but didn't fight him, as much as she surely wanted to.
"Pay attention. Are you?"
"Yes."
"Yes, what?"
"Yes...sir?"
"Wrong."
"Yes, Jay."
"I like how you say my name. Scream it while you come." He pushed her legs apart and knelt between, pushing up against her. She was hot and wet against him, utterly ready, and there was no doubt that it was starting to work on him. That was what he wanted her to feel, to know. He ran his fingers over the scarring on her back. She made another distressed sound, and this time tried to pull away from him, but there was nowhere to go.
"No. Stay still. Feel. Just feel."
It became a cycle they were locked into. Controlling her made him harder; so did touching her, the scars themselves and that she was giving him the most vulnerable thing about her. As she felt it happening, confusion came off her like a scent. But that was changing, and he could feel that, too.
He was ready, and she was half a dozen steps beyond ready. He pulled her back onto his thighs, raising her hips to an angle that put her at his use. He paused a last time with the head of his cock just parting her, barely inside, and ran his hands over her back once more. "You are so beautiful. Do you know how much?"
She shook her head, hands clutching the pillow under her upper body.
"About eight inches' worth, baby."
He gave her all of it in one thrust. She was wet and ready enough to take it, and she did, with only a single cry of shock and a moment's struggling against the abrupt invasion. He plunged into her again and again, half-insensible with lust. There wasn't any gentleness or mercy left in him. He wanted to cut her so badly that the need was hurting him the way the blade would hurt her. He saw her put her hands up to keep her head from slamming into the wall, and all he could do was throw his own head back, laugh, and fuck her harder.
The sounds she was making were all about that pain-pleasure place, but she never quite went over the edge. The third time he was certain she would, he felt it: Muscles inside her clenching, and her forcing it back. Of course. Idiot.
"You come for me, baby. And remember what I told you. Now."
She did, and she remembered, too. At least when the neighbors complained, they'd know what name to call him by. He'd been holding back himself, waiting on her; feeling her tighten down on him, and struggle again - this time against a pleasure that was pushing the boundaries of bearable - was all he could take. The sound that tore from him was almost a scream, too. He yanked her back onto him, buried himself in her fully, and let nature take control.
Later, his arms full of trembling woman, her fingers dug into his back, he murmured in her ear, knowing she wasn't quite asleep yet, "Are you all right?"
It took him a while to figure out she was laughing, and he still wasn't sure until he tilted her head up so he could see.
"All right? Yes." She grabbed his hand and pressed her lips to it in a long, slow, motionless kiss. "Very."
She still tried to get up and go back to her own room later. He held her down until she stopped trying and moved back up against him. Sex wasn't going to solve everything, of course, and surely not the first time. But he thought they'd made a good start of it.