Disclaimer: Castiel still loves me and the Winchesters are incredibly fond of me but I still do not own them. Boo hoo. I don't own Gabriel either.

Author's Note: Okay, so this chapter was extremely easy for me to write and I greatly enjoyed doing so (for obvious reasons) and I really hope you guys will like it to.

Kudos to all of you awesome people adding me to both their favorites and story alerts list, I really am flattered and appreciate it greatly. Props to LoverPR-SN-HP, my new Beta for helping me out lately, I am incredibly grateful!

Okay on to the lovely Castiel!

Seems that I have been held in some dreaming state
A tourist in the waking world, never quite awake
No kiss, no gentle word could wake me from this slumber

Till I realize that it was you who held me under
Felt it in my fist, in my feet, in the hollows of my eyelids
Shaking through my skull, through my spine and down through my ribs

It was Castiel's true visage, she knew it; Kallie just knew it. No one else, mortal or not could affect Kallie so, at the mere pure sight of him, the entire last year seemed little more than a nightmare, and that she was finally awake. But something felt wrong. Everything Kallie had gone through, from meeting the Winchesters to the catatonic time she spent with Clara, was far too vivid to have just been some horrid creation of Kallie's overactive imagination. Then again, Castiel had been known to visit her in her dreams when he couldn't be with her physically, but after losing Cas, she wasn't entirely sure that was possible anymore, so she decided to ask the source.

"Castiel," Kallie cleared her throat half from of the raw emotion that coated her throat and half because she was not sure how to start, "are you really here?"

As she watched, the pure light began to take shape to gain a form and when the light faded to the peripheral Castiel in the form of his old vessel Daniel could be seen. As she watched in wonder at the form of the one she'd lost, a look of great confusion crossed his face. She could see him just like he used to appear when she would ask something he could not understand complete with squished up lines on the bridge of his nose while his eyes narrowed in confusion. For just a second it felt just like the old days.

Kallie long knew that this was a sign for her to elaborate so she did, "I mean, am I actually seeing you in your true form though I happen to be sleeping, or is my head making all this up and you will soon be chased away by some lovely pink elephants and their evil army of hairdresser assassins*?"

Though he appeared to Kallie as Daniel he still spoke in his true voice. Then he laughed, and it was a sound that sent wonderful thrills of delight up and down the length of Kallie's body until all of her felt warm and utterly and completely happy. Castiel may not understand all of Earth humor but he understood all of Kallie. She was the only to have ever made him laugh.

"I'm not quite sure, myself." Castiel responded with a classic Castiel answer, he had a tendency to be unintentionally vague.

"Okay then, forget actual answers." Kallie ran a hand through her brown hair that was washed golden before the angel, and tried a new tack, "How are you?"

"That's irrelevant." Castiel answered simply, taking in every detail of Kallie's face.

Kallie sighed, as she still attempted to figure out if she was making up their conversation or not, and Castiel's answers were not helping at all, "Of course it is. If how you are is irrelevant, then what are you doing here? I hardly think it was just to chat."

Castiel sighed, "I came to see you, though I clearly shouldn't have. It was not easy for me to leave you, even if that is what God intended. I'm weaker that I should be, but I can not be ashamed if it lets me see you, again."

Kallie began to become more and more convinced that this was not just a dream she was experiencing and the hope nearly broke her with all of its shining potential and power to change her life. Kallie took a step forward, embracing her angel as Castiel's mere presence comforted her much like a warm blanket would on a cold day, "I've missed you too. You have no idea how much."

"But I do." Castiel's holy powerful voice spoke right in her ear as his presence surrounded his warrior, "I've been forced to watch but not return since my last mistake, and I fear it has cost you greatly."

"It all seems worth it now, just for this moment." Kallie sighed, happier than she'd been in what felt like decades.

"I am sorry." Castiel breathed softly, his magnificent voice full of pain.

"Stop talking like all of the evil in the world is your fault." Kallie responded trying to wipe out all memory beyond this moment.

"Some of it is though, like your pain. I'm afraid I have to leave again." Castiel told her reluctantly.

Kallie pulled out of Castiel's arms with a look of complete distress on her face, "But why?! Why can't you come back and find another vessel? I'm sure there's some other fool who would love to walk around with an angel inside 'em."

"Kallie, it's not that simple. This is just how it has to be for the moment." Castiel said with his eyes full of sadness.

Trying to fight back tears at the thought of Castiel leaving again, Kallie instead asked, "When will I see you again?"

"I don't know, I'll try again soon but Gabriel won't like it." Castiel answered.

"Well forget about him," Kallie demanded, with no humor in her voice, "why does it even matter to him anyway?"

"Because he fears I've changed too much, that I'm not the dauntless angel I once was. That my love for a human has softened me." Castiel paused as if he were trying to decide whether to go on or not, then continued, "But he's right. It has changed me. I used to smite first, ask questions later but I'm just not sure anymore. I get your voice in my head telling me to think about what I am doing and it overrides whatever supreme order I was given. And the other angels have begun to notice, even worse; Gabriel has started to notice. It's become evident that it is highly unlikely that I will ever be approved for another mission on earth."

Castiel paused allowing Kallie a moment for all that he said to sink in. And Kallie desperately needed it; she needed time to wrap her head around the fact that so many things were happening to her and to him because Castiel fell for her. She began to feel horrible gut wrenching guilt for getting him removed from Earth over such a simple thing like loving her. She worried the world was suffering for their weakness. But with one look at Castiel's face, she knew it had all been worth it. The five years she had spent being trained by Castiel were by far the best, most challenging, exhilarating years of her life. There was no room for regrets when she realized that, so she couldn't say that she was sorry, to tell him she was sorry for their current situation was to say that she was sorry for loving him, that she was sorry he loved her, that she was sorry they broke the rules. And Kallie St. James was not sorry, not for this.

With all of this in mind, she responded carefully and controlled, "So what are you going to do?"

The angel drew in a deep, hesitant breath then answered with a bombshell, "I'm thinking about falling."

Kallie wasn't sure what she had been expecting, but it had most certainly not been that; for an angel to fall was both like dying and being born at the same time, it was inexact and always led to dangers. It would lead to a hunt like never before, angels and demons both would seek to find the fallen angel to use him to their best advantage. And as nice as the idea of Castiel being completely human and completely hers enthralled Kallie, she could not allow it, "No."

"No?" Castiel asked, his voice colored by bewilderment.

"No." Kallie repeated, "I absolutely forbid it. it's not just the length the process would take that puts a pause in my step but also the fact that you would never be safe and even if I unleashed all the holy potential I had, there is no way I could keep you safe long enough. You can't do this."

Clearly deterred but listening to her wisdom, he said, "I shall remain as I am. I shall not fall."

Kallie breathed out a deep sigh of relief, feeling a weight disappearing as he agreed with her idea. Then another thought crossed her mind that she had to voice, "Will I get to remember this?"

"Would it make you happy?" Castiel asked because that was all that mattered to him.

"Indescribably." Kallie answered her blue eyes flashing.

Without breaking eye contact he responded, "Then it shall be so."

And just with that, Kallie was completely content for the first time in over a year. Then the atmosphere changed.

Kallie's vision began to shift and she felt as though her mind was being shaken, her vision distorted. Castiel's angelic face assumed an expression of worry, apprehension and fear as if he knew something was coming and whispered almost imperceptibly, "Gabriel."

Beginning to panic slightly at the thought of being separated from Castiel so soon she drew closer, asking, "What is it? What's happening?"

"It's Gabriel. He's found me. He's trying to gain access to here." Castiel explained quickly looking around him as if he expected Gabriel to fall from the sky and attack at any moment.

"Where are we, how could he have found us?" Kallie asked, not fully comprehending what was happening but knowing it was bad.

"This place is not supposed to be findable; it's a sanctuary between dimensions, a place I thought we could meet." Castiel answered still on edge.

"What do we do?" Kallie asked, her eyes flashing from place to place, constantly looking back at Castiel for fear he would disappear.

"There's nothing we can do, I have to get you out of here." Castiel said but before he could do anything Kallie cringed, almost falling to the ground before Castiel steadied her. It felt as though white hot hands were scraping and pounding on her mind and on the edges of her consciousness.

Instantly concerned for the girl he supported with his arms, he asked desperately, "Kallie, what is it?"

One single word summed up the terror that faced them, "Gabriel."

As the angel beat even harder on Kallie's poor mind, Castiel made up his mind, "You are leaving."

Kallie looked up from her pain, sheer panic lighting up her eyes, "Castiel."

"I love you, Kallie." Castiel whispered urgently before he placed a hand on her forehead and sent the warrior of God hurtling back to consciousness.

A feeling of weightlessness of both falling and flying took over Kallie as she was pushed from the sanctuary. As she painfully made her journey back to the world of the awake, she could hear heavenly voices shouting as if from a great distance as Gabriel found Kallie's only love. Not knowing whether or not she could be heard in her current state of transition, Kallie prayed, "Lord, please, dear God. Protect Castiel, keep him safe, do him no harm just for loving me. Know that he still loves you..."

The frantic prayer trailed off as things grew fuzzy and hazy in the split second before her spirit reentered her body as Kallie jerked awake to the Winchesters in her room, concern etched on their faces as they stood over her.

"We heard you screaming." Sam explained as he stood over her before asking intently, "Are you okay?"

Kallie sat up, desperately trying to grasp what had just happened and finding difficulty to remembering, feeling as though some unseen hand was attempting to wipe her mind. Tears in her eyes left over from dreaming, she responded in little more than a whisper, "I hardly know."

And I could hear thunder and see the lightning crack
All around the world was waking, I never could go back
'Cause all the walls of dreaming, they were torn wide open
Finally I see, that the spell was broken
Then all my bones began to shake, my eyes flew open
No more dreaming of the dead as if death itself was undone
No more calling like a crow for a boy for a body in the garden
No more dreaming like a girl so in love, so in love

No more dreaming like a girl so in love, so in love

No more dreaming like a girl so in love with the wrong world

*=I actually had that dream once.

AN: Okay, that is it! I really loved writing this!

Please let me know if you have any questions and especially let me know about anything in this story that really tickles you or that you really enjoyed! Reviews are love so please talk to me people!

Remember that reviews make me that much more likely to update quick.

Also if you have a problem with anything in the story, I would actually love to hear that too.

oh and i know it's not relevent these last few chapter but it will come up later that Ruby does not exist in this story. this is where we come to the AU part of it. as much fun as Ruby is, she interferes with my story arc, so you can kind of think of Kallie as a bit of a replacememnt for Ruby even though she's not a demon.

again, i have nothing against Ruby but she just doesn't make sense in this story. it's easier without her. I thought i would throw that out there.

Okay that's it!

REVIEW!

-Fin