A/N: Hi all. I'm still alive and still working on this story too. For all still reading I thank you for your amazing patience! And thanks to all for reviewing and favouriting and all the rest. It's awesome to have that feedback! Hopefully I will be more regular with updating now that I'm back in the swing of things.
This chapter: Rachel tries to help out…this one is a bit lighter on the Pezberry friendship and has a little more Brittana.
-G-
"Hey Brittany. It's Rachel," Rachel said softly.
"Rachel?" Brittany replied sleepily on the other end of the phone. "What's going on?"
"Santana's here again. I'm worried about her," Rachel told her.
"What happened?" Rachel could hear rustling, presumably Brittany's covers as she sat up in bed, suddenly more awake.
"She was dirty and freezing and she had burned herself on something. She was really upset. And sober," Rachel told her, keeping her voice low as she watched the door to the guestroom where Santana was still asleep. She wasn't sure if she should be calling Brittany right now but she was so worried and she just didn't know what else to do.
"What's your address? I'm coming over," Brittany's voice was urgent and Rachel could hear her moving around her room, probably getting dressed. Rachel quickly rattled off her address. "I know where that is, it's just down from Quinn's right?" Brittany verified.
"That's right," Rachel affirmed, nodding despite knowing that Brittany couldn't see her.
"I'll be there really soon ok?" Brittany told her. "Is she still asleep?" she asked.
"Yes she is," Rachel replied, leaning a little to peek through the slightly ajar door to check that in fact Santana was still asleep in the bed.
"Ok, if she wakes before I get there try to keep her there ok?" Brittany instructed.
"Ok," Rachel agreed.
"Great. I'll see you soon Rachel," Brittany hung up and Rachel tucked her phone into her pocket and got up from her seat on the top stair, shifting to sit on her bed instead and wait for Brittany to arrive. She arrived less than ten minutes later, texting Rachel to let her know she was there rather than ringing the doorbell in case Santana was still asleep.
"Hi," Rachel greeted when she opened the door.
"Hey," Brittany gave a tight smile. "Is she still sleeping? Is she ok?" she asked worriedly, her eyes scanning the around looking for the other girl.
"Yeah she's still sleeping. I don't know how she is today. She seemed to be coming right a little last night when she went to bed," Rachel told the other girl.
"Tell me what's been going on? When did she start coming here?" Brittany's voice had become demanding with a worried edge to it and Rachel led her to the living room to explain. She started with finding Santana in her room on the night of Puckerman's party and ended with when she had shown her to the guestroom the previous night. Rachel struggled to keep eye contact with Brittany, not liking the depth of the pain in her eyes. Brittany was quiet a little while, seemingly processing all that Rachel had told her. She opened to mouth to say something but a quiet voice behind them interrupted.
"Brittany?" Santana's still sleepy voice was laced with confusion. "Why are you at Rachel's?"
"I came to see you," Brittany replied simply, leaving out the part where Rachel had called her. As Santana came closer to the couch Brittany visibly flinched at the sight of the scrapes on her hands and chin.
"Oh," Santana had reached the front of the couch now and she seemed to debate for moment before wriggling herself into the small gap between Rachel and the arm of the couch. Rachel was flicking her gaze back and forth between the two of them watching carefully and she didn't miss the hurt look that momentarily flashed on Brittany's face when Santana chose to keep Rachel between them instead of sitting next to her. Santana seemed to not notice and rubbed at her face before squinting at Brittany through sleep-bleary eyes. "Why did you want to see me?" she asked.
"I miss you. I miss my best friend," Brittany replied honestly, her voice a little wobbly.
"You don't have to miss me," Santana said sharply.
"Santana I'm not trying to hurt you!" Brittany's tone was desperate and broken.
"Well you are," Santana kept her eyes locked forward and spat the words out in the same sharp tone as before. "You're hurting me because you are putting unrealistic expectations on me and then punishing me when I can't meet them! That's a pretty horrible thing to do to someone you consider your 'best friend', Brittany." Rachel could see as plain as day that Santana felt hurt and that since Brittany, in her mind, was the cause of the hurt, she was trying to hurt her back. And succeeding. Rachel didn't think she had ever seen someone look as devastated and hurt as Brittany did as Santana's words sunk in.
"Santana that's not fair of you to say. You do that too," Brittany finally replied, visibly struggling to hold herself together. "You know I'm an open person. You know I don't like to hide who I am. And that's what you're making me do. You're making me hide. Like you're ashamed to be with me. I thought when you told me you loved me that you were ready to really be with me. But then you went straight back in the closet and wanted to hide again!" Brittany voice was rising and breaking by the end and Rachel decided to try and mediate the situation a little bit.
"Can I say something? As someone on the outside of all of this?" she asked hesitantly, surprised when both Brittany and Santana nodded, Santana even looking slightly eager.
"I don't think either of you are really listening to one another right now. You are both doing things that are hurting the other. Brittany, what will your family say if you tell them you're in love with Santana?" she asked, picking her words carefully so as not to slap a label on Brittany that she might not be comfortable with.
"They'll be happy for me. My Uncle is gay. They all love him. It'll be fine," Rachel watched Brittany's face carefully as she spoke, and she could see that Brittany fully believed what she was saying.
"So they're very open and accepting?" she verified.
"Yeah," Brittany nodded.
"Santana what about your family? What do you think will happen if you tell them you love Brittany?" Rachel felt Santana flinch violently beside her.
"My Mami's family will hate me," she said softly. "You should hear them talk about Rachel's Dads," she spoke directly to Brittany now. "They think they are absolute scum and that Rachel should be taken away from them and their 'abhorrent' lifestyle. Sorry Rachel," she said softly at the end. Rachel took it in her stride having grown up hearing a lot of that kind of crap from people in Lima.
"What about your parents?" Rachel pressed.
"I don't know. They always say that Mami's family are ridiculous and hateful and that they don't see how it's their business whether or not two grown men have a loving relationship and a child," she shrugged. "I think they'd be a little shocked. I don't know," she shrugged again.
"Brittany, can you see why Santana is so reluctant to come out now?" Rachel asked. "You have no doubt that your family will accept you. Santana has no doubt that many of her family members wont." Brittany, who was looking at Santana carefully now, her eyes a lot softer and less upset than they had been, nodded in response. "And Santana can you see why Brittany doesn't feel like it's as big a deal as you do?" Santana nodded. "Great! That's a start. Now you can start finding ways to maybe compromise," Rachel said excitedly, proud of what she had achieved with them.
"Like what?" Santana asked carefully. Brittany beamed proudly at her and Santana smiled shyly back.
"Well, why don't you go on a date? Maybe to Breadstix and a movie?" Rachel asked. "No one else has to know it's a date but you two y'know," she said at the look on Santana's face. "Movie theatres are pretty dark, and everyone is too busy watching the movie to notice who is holding whose hand in the audience."
"I think, maybe I could do that," Santana said carefully. Brittany's face could have lit up the whole of Ohio at that.
"Britt," Rachel called her attention to her.
"Yes?" Brittany replied, distracted by Santana folding in on herself and being incredibly adorably shy next to Rachel.
"Look at me Britt," Rachel smiled in exasperation. Brittany pulled her eyes away from Santana to look at Rachel. "You have to stop looking at how far Santana has to go and start seeing how far she's come instead. She sang with you in Glee Club, she told you she loved you, she told me she loved you. That's huge. I bet she wouldn't have even considered doing that a year ago," Rachel guessed.
"And she told Holly she was questioning her sexuality. And she sang me a love song to cheer me up when I was sad. Even if it was only in front of the creepy piano guy," Brittany said softly, staring reverently at Santana as she did. She slowly crept out a hand, reaching over Rachel and holding it out palm up in front of Santana. Santana hesitated before taking it in hers, squeezing gently. Brittany kept her hand stretched out over Rachel for a moment before pulling Santana's hand closer to her with a frown.
"What happened Santana?" she asked gently, stroking her thumb lightly over the dressing on her wrist. Santana promptly pulled her hand away from Brittany's and back into her lap.
"It's stupid," She replied softly.
"That's ok, I have stupid accidents all the time," Brittany said softly, her voice lifting almost into a coo. "Remember when the mousetrap broke my little toe?"
"Yeah," Santana giggled slightly. Brittany cocked her head expectantly. "I was upset. I wanted to make a cup of the chamomile tea you gave me. I was crying and my eyes were blurry and I burned myself on the electric jug when I went to pick it up 'cause I couldn't see properly," She admitted.
Brittany moved to kneel in front of her, picking up her hand again and raising it to her lips to gently place a kiss over the dressing. Rachel watched, entranced, as Santana blushed furiously at Brittany's actions.
"Wanna come over to my house and watch Disney movies? We can watch Despicable Me? I know you love the minions?" Brittany tried to tempt Santana.
"Maybe not today Britt," Santana said gently.
"Aw," Brittany said sadly.
"I just…I don't know Brittany. I need some time Ok?" Santana kept her voice gentle but the strain was evident. Things were better between them but they were far from ok and Santana needed a little time to figure out what she wanted - what she needed – from Brittany.
"Ok," Brittany nodded. Her bottom lip was threatening to slip into a pout but Brittany dutifully controlled it, knowing that that was not what Santana needed from her right now. She needed space and Brittany would give it to her. "Ok. But San, where are you going to go tonight? I don't like it when you're home alone when you're sad," Brittany asked.
"Are your parents away? You can stay here again if you'd like?" Rachel cut in.
"My Mom's away and my Dad is hardly home 'cause of his job," Santana said quietly. "Is it really ok for me to stay?" she asked shyly.
"Sure. My Dad's are away. It'd be nice to have some company, even if you just want to stay in the guest room," Rachel told her.
"Thank you," Santana's voice was still shy and that made Rachel feel weird. It wasn't like Santana to be so quiet.
"I should go home. My Mom will wonder where I've gotten to," Brittany told them, standing and brushing off her knees.
"Bye Britt," Santana said, not making a move to stand or walk Brittany out. It baffled Rachel for a moment until she realised that Santana didn't want to be alone with Brittany.
"Bye Santana," Brittany leaned down and placed a kiss on top of Santana's head. Rachel led Brittany out to the foyer and opened the door for her. Brittany moved to step through it but then stopped and turned to Rachel. "Thank you," she whispered, leaning in to kiss Rachel's cheek. She moved to step through the door again but again she paused and turned back. "I know that you don't eat it, but she likes Kraft macaroni and cheese to eat and apple juice to drink when she's sad," Brittany told her, an edge of pleading in her hushed voice.
"I'll take care of her," Rachel promised keeping her own voice quiet.
"Can you call me once she's sleeping? So I know she's ok? I'm so worried about her. She isn't herself," Brittany asked.
"Sure," Rachel nodded.
"Thank you Rachel," Brittany said again before turning and walking out of the door. Rachel closed it behind her and took a few deep breaths before heading back to the living room, expecting to find a very closed off Santana waiting for her.
-G-
A/N2 More Pezberry friendship action next chapter :-)