Despite the layer of dirt and grime

"I know you won't tell me. So I brought some leverage."

rage – 1. a violent state of the elements 2. a feeling of intense anger 3. an interest followed with exaggerated zeal 4. something that is desired intensely

GLaDOS knew the meaning of rage. Hell, she probably understood it better than humans considering everything she'd been through. She'd seen humans express it, lose themselves in it, have their lives completely fall apart because of it. She never understood why they acted so irrational under its influence; when she found herself being antagonized by a certain test subject she directed her rage toward more… creative outlets.

Yes, she'd grown angry in the past. Like suffering a humiliating defeat at the hands of a human, reawakening to find her facility in ruins, being forced out of her mainframe and jammed into… an unspeakable vegetable, and seeing her very facility nearly explode into oblivion due to one moron's incompetence. But even then it was calculated anger, something she used to her advantage. Unlike herself, humans always seemed to display their aggression with petty revenge or violence. Really the idea was quite stupid and GLaDOS knew it.

But until now she had never felt the impulse to punch someone in the face so much.

How could Chell be so stupid? As much as GLaDOS hated to admit, Chell was one of if not the best test subject she'd ever had. Yet somehow she couldn't figure out that the thing addressing her was an imposter? It was like some kind of sadistic paradox with a painfully obvious solution. Maybe that was how Chell's mind worked: smart when it came to complex tests and a total moron at everything else.

If so, GLaDOS was in a lot more trouble than she calculated earlier.

After unintentionally… losing it earlier, she'd finally recomposed herself and sorted out her variables. She was human. Chell was here. The two of them were testing. GLaDOS had lost her voice; hopefully that was only temporary. Chell thought the imposter was really GLaDOS. She was also slowly turning into a bigger moron than the king of all morons. Well… that last one couldn't really count.

Why did sorting out the variables only make her feel worse?

GLaDOS sighed for the thousandth time. Funny how quickly she'd gotten used to breathing; it was almost second nature to her at this point. How she hated it. But it was a necessary evil, a reminder that if she forgot to take a breath she'd expire faster than a rotten potato.

Now here they were again in the same elevator headed to the next test. And to think they were only getting to Test #3. No wonder it had taken Chell so long to get through nineteen tests.

But it was partly her own fault.

No it wasn't. GLaDOS knew perfectly well how to solve these tests. She'd observed humans solve them for years, recording every detail to alter, every flaw to fix, every new way she could make the tests more challenging. Sometimes doing so made them more deadly but science was science. She couldn't help that humans were so very breakable.

GLaDOS looked down at the pathetic little twigs that were her legs. It wasn't her fault she could barely walk; if this human had actually kept her weight under control then she wouldn't be having this problem. Maybe that was why Chell was so fat- no, she wasn't. That joke had worn thin once she'd returned. Chell looked nearly as bad as she did but at least she could walk. GLaDOS almost envied her until she remembered she wouldn't be in this predicament if not for Orange. She at least hoped the imposter had disassembled that traitor.

"I've been thinking. Since Caroline's such a burden to you, I was thinking about creating a little scientific experiment to ensure a more productive testing process. How does the idea of conjoined test subjects sound to you?"

Speak of the devil. GLaDOS literally couldn't put her hatred into words of this thing, this virus. Whatever it was. It was ruining her life and enjoying it too.

The elevator came to a shaky stop and GLaDOS found herself dreading the thought of having to walk again. Even worse: having someone help her. It was embarrassing beyond nearly anything she'd ever endured. Yet a small part of her almost felt… grateful. Chell could have been a horrible person as usual and left her to the mercy of this imposter but she didn't. Why though? Even GLaDOS knew she was quite useless in this state and Chell clearly didn't enjoy her company so what was the point of keeping spare baggage around?

What did it matter? Soon she'd be back in her old body again once Chell's inner murderer inevitably emerged. But for now GLaDOS would have to settle with being dragged like a rag doll to the next test. Chell silently helped her up. GLaDOS knew it was unnecessary to squeeze Chell's hand so hard (and it could potentially cut off her circulation) but it was the only thing keeping her from the crashing to the floor.

The entrance slid open to reveal the array of obstacles they'd have to face. Thermal Ray Beams, raised panels... seeing it all so closely never failed to impress GLaDOS. Miserable as this situation was, at least her tests were still challenging.

"One thing to note" the imposter chimed in "The Thermal Ray Beam is on a timer. If it happens to switch off while you're over the pit of acid... Well, you can't say I didn't warn you."

Sure enough the beam switched off almost on cue then came back on around thirty seconds later.

One thing GLaDOS had learned: for an imposter, it made some pretty good tests. The look on Chell's face was enough for GLaDOS to see just how intimidated she was. "I'm sure we'll be… fine."

Another thing GLaDOS had learned: Chell was a terrible liar.

The minute they were in the test chamber, Chell practically dumped GLaDOS onto the floor and left her to her thoughts. Fine then. GLaDOS wouldn't have bothered helping her anyways. It wasn't like she had already solved this test or anything. Actually… why was this so much more… difficult? For the first time GLaDOS found herself straining to make sure she'd calculated every obstacle and advantage of this test solution. She'd never done that in the past even when out of her old body as the vegetable that shall not be mentioned.

Before, testing had come so naturally when GLaDOS was forced into the vegetable that shall still not be mentioned. But she couldn't use that knowledge without frying every one of her circuits. Now she had the perfect opportunity to solve these tests in mere minutes… so why couldn't she grasp it? It made no sense! When she finally saw the test with her own eyes, it was overwhelming. The solution was clear but the execution was confusing.

Was that why it took Chell so long? GLaDOS sighed. What was the point of solving it anyways? It wasn't like she could help Chell considering her inconvenient muteness.

How was Chell holding up anyways? Probably fine, considering the only thing she knew was testing. And murdering. But at the moment she was only capable of doing the former. In no time, they'd be out of here one some other life-threatening adventure to stop a power-mad AI. As if the first time wasn't terrible enough.

But wait a minute. That portal was too low. The momentum wouldn't be enough to propel Chell over it. Didn't she realize that? And if she wasn't careful she'd only end up getting closer to the pit of acid until she accidentally fell in it. There was also a problem with her aim in general; it was always off by just a margin but enough to… GLaDOS hadn't remembered being so critical of Chell's testing before.

What was wrong with her?

GLaDOS watched the test subject stumble and misplace the portals as if she'd never tested in her life. This wasn't the stubborn woman who'd been so hell-bent on getting away from Aperture. This was… pitiful. Chell wouldn't dare let herself die from a simple test. She wasn't that careless. Was she?

But wouldn't that rid you of her forever?

GLaDOS almost regretted thinking something so horrible. But only because Chell was basically her ticket back into her old body. Well, unless she didn't start getting her act together… Then what would that leave GLaDOS with? A portal gun and a pathetic human body? She shuddered at the idea of being stuck like this forever. How did Chell stand it, knowing she would die in sixty years or less?

Then again, if she wasn't careful she was going to die right now.

The solution was so very obvious it was almost painful. But all GLaDOS could do was sit and stare. How could it be so hard to walk? It was an enigma to her; Chell did. Thousands of other test subjects had done it every day.

She was too close. If she didn't redo her aim then she'd surely fall into the acid this time. But what could GLaDOS do about that? She had to do something though… if Chell didn't make it out of these alive then GLaDOS wouldn't last much longer.

It happened so fast. One moment Chell had fired the gun. Next she was running. Running to her death. But in that instant, something had clicked in GLaDOS's mind, like a subconscious instinct. Where else could she have found the strength to yell at the top of her lungs to save Chell from a test subject's death?

"STOP!"

Chell stepped back, just as surprised as GLaDOS was that she'd managed to scream so loudly. Granted the effort had left her with a mouthful of blood but it was a start right? Chell must have realized the error of her portal placement and quickly realigned them.

"What was I thinking?" Chell murmured to herself. She obviously hadn't been. But GLaDOS had. She'd practically solved this test… now if only she could figure out how to physically apply that solution…

There Chell went again. Her aim was still off. How hard was it to place a portal correctly? It was driving GLaDOS crazy. Every time she ended up a mere inches from death by acid. How could she not notice these details that were so crucial to solving tests? Maybe this time she'd do it right. Then GLaDOS might be able to resist marching right over there and solving the test herself.

She fell even closer to the pit of acid this time.

That did it. GLaDOS was not letting Aperture's pride and joy get mishandled by some test subject. Using every ounce of strength she had, GLaDOS got up and slowly stumbled over to where Chell was. She initially frowned at the sight of seeing GLaDOS try so very hard then jerked the portal gun away in surprise when GLaDOS reached for it.

"Look… I think I work better with it… but you can still help me!" Chell indicated toward the Thermal Ray Beam. "If you can get across that to the button we can solve this test."

Or she could fire the portals herself with perfect aim and have Chell risk her life by walking over the beam that would shut down any moment now. But no, Chell's life was much more valuable than hers. Obviously, she should keep the portal gun. She had always been selfish; GLaDOS just had realized to what extent until now.

Chell awkwardly tried to get the portal gun back into her possession but GLaDOS protectively wrapped her arms around it.

"Caroline… I don't… trust you with the portal gun." Chell tried to explain as nicely as possible. But murderers can't be nice.

Her grip tightened on the portal gun.

"You really don't…"

GLaDOS tugged harder.

Chell pried the portal gun a little too forcefully out of GLaDOS's hands and settled it back on her arm. "I'll hang on to this… you just have to get to the other side, okay?"

GLaDOS frowned. Why did Chell act so protective over Aperture's equipment? No… she couldn't have seriously grown attached to the portal gun. Here GLaDOS had been thinking all this time the Companion Cube held more sentimental value than her own equipment. But she supposed it was typical for someone to want something that belonged to her.

So GLaDOS would have to walk across the beam. It was only a short distance. But that drop… even from below GLaDOS could tell it was a good thirty feet, four inches, and eleven centimeters tall. In laymen's terms, bone-shattering for someone without a pair of fall boots. But what choice did she have? It wasn't like they could sit in the test chamber and continue glaring at each other, not when GLaDOS had a facility to reclaim.

Chell nodded to GLaDOS as the Thermal Ray Beam clicked on again. This wouldn't be hard. GLaDOS had solved hundreds of tests before… from an observational point. Physically solving them would just be a new, more creative challenge. Somehow she couldn't persuade herself to think like that. Perhaps this was how Chell felt when promised cake.

Chell fired the portals and GLaDOS tried her best to get through them without falling. It was a long drop that would either break every bone in her malnourished legs or disintegrate her entirely in a pit of acid. One foot in front of the other. It was simple as that yet so complicated.

Crossing through the portal was quick and painless. If only the long height downward didn't send her head spinning.

From the cameras it all looked so much smaller. Then again, weighing two tons made everything seem smaller in perspective. But if she fell… GLaDOS had to stop thinking about that! She had jumped from much more intimidating heights with Chell and she was lucky the woman hadn't up and dropped her as a potato.

So why did that fall only seem riskier?

One foot in front of the other. Her feet struggled to maintain their balance but she had to go forward. At this point there was no turning back until she got to the button. Her hands grasped the adjacent wall for support and to put a little less pressure on her feet but she was still slow. What if she didn't make it in time? What if her whole body broke like a glass plate?

"Caroline," Chell said with a hint of nervousness in her voice. "I don't mean to startle you but… we're getting close on time."

Did she honestly think GLaDOS didn't realize that? The Thermal Ray Beam stayed on for 45.248 seconds and she'd been counting every second. So far she'd been making her way across the beam for 32.492 seconds. Which left her… roughly 13 seconds. 12. 11. 10.

"Caroline, please hurry. I know you're- wait." Both of them saw the open panel. GLaDOS gasped for breath as she struggled to make it to the opening inside. 8. 7. 6. "Get in there! Get in there!"

4. 3. 2.

"You can do it!" It was a matter of if she could do it. She had to do it.

1.

"Get in there!" Chell screamed.

.248.

The beam clicked off just as GLaDOS slid into the open alcove, letting out a sigh of relief. She had been so close to falling; her feet were practically dangling over the pit of acid. Still a little nervous, she managed to drag herself away from the potential fall and further into the little alcove. And only when she was safely hidden away did she realize what she had stumbled into.

Clearly she didn't know her facility as much as she'd thought.

Someone had been here. Someone had been here a long time. Or at least long enough to leave empty bottles, food cans, and an assortment of other needless human items left long ago to rot in this space. The thought of a human once living and breathing in here was unsettling. Even worse… how long had they been in here?

But the debris was nothing compared to the walls.

It was chaotic, something out a nightmare. Etched on the wall in a myriad of vibrant colors was a mural of Aperture. Or a madman's twisted view of it. Turrets to the right, bodies of test subjects to the left, cores, test chambers, neurotoxin, it had everything of Aperture all combined into some bizarre work of art. In the middle stood a giant, looking on at everything in her facility like a god watching over its people.

The craziest part? The giant in the middle was GLaDOS.

Why did this all seem like a puzzle GLaDOS was supposed to put together? A secret room? Scattered supplies long used up? Wild and incomprehensible paintings? Who could have been living here so long undetected, creating art inspired by the most mentally insane of… GLaDOS knew.

This was Doug Rattmann's doing.

That rat. That miserable little rat. All these years, he'd been hiding until she'd finally found him with a bleeding leg jammed in stasis. After that… let's just say his admission to the Being Alive Club was quickly revoked. Really she was doing him a favor. No one with the wild and crazy delusions of that man could seriously expect to ever live a happy life.

GLaDOS had never felt so glad the day she finally exterminated that rat. For years, he'd been antagonizing her, always slipping just out of her reach like a rat scurrying into its den. So this was where he'd burrowed himself. What if there were even more hideaways? It would explain how Subject 517 had escaped. She was practically a rat herself.

The more she looked at them, the more pathetic these murals looked. Nothing but a cruel reminder of a mental disease that could never be fully cured. All they were doing was contaminating her facility. Just like the imposter was. Funny how much those two had in common, always being in places they weren't supposed to be. Still the idea that someone had been constantly watching her every move and re-enacting it on a discarded panel was unsettling.

Hold on… these couldn't have been made without some kind of painting material. He had to have used something. Something good for writing. This was her chance! GLaDOS immediately began digging through the junk for something, anything to communicate. If only she could find something to get Chell's moronic brain to understand everything that had happened, they could escape, GLaDOS could get her body back, Chell would go away forever, and everything would be fine. Right?

There. A red paint can lay in the corner, practically waiting for someone to use it. GLaDOS quickly picked it up and examined it for some way to use it. She probably knew how but never had she been required to remember how to spray paint running the facility. What was the point when she'd had more important, mandatory things to attend to? Finally figuring out how the mechanics worked GLaDOS aimed the paint can at the wall and pressed.

It was empty. GLaDOS threw the can back down in frustration. All it did was clutter up her facility. Worthless. Just like this worthless human body.

Speaking of humans, Chell had finally decided to grace GLaDOS with her presence. How thoughtful. Maybe if she was lucky, Chell would grow some brain cells and realize the thing corrupting GLaDOS's old body was an imposter. But probably not.

"Thank god you… oh my god." GLaDOS watched Chell's expression switch rapidly from relief to… awe? How could anyone feel anything other than horror at such a disturbing site? "The dens… the secret dens."

She'd seen these before?

"I can't believe these are still here… I sound crazy don't I, Caroline?" Not crazy, just oblivious. Of course she was still oblivious. She couldn't dare use a fraction of her common sense to realize that GLaDOS wasn't and never would be Caroline.

"When I first found one of these… I was terrified. I thought I'd go as crazy as the gibberish on the wall from testing and GLaDOS and just… isolation. I was starting to accept the nonstop testing but this… it was a wake-up call. Someone was trying to tell me something."

That someone was a schizophrenic MADMAN.

"Now I realize… I think they might have saved my life."

It made perfect sense. Why else would that little rat stick around with no other reason but to terrorize GLaDOS? He knew her love of testing and would try anything to prevent her from doing it. And she liked him. Chell felt gratitude toward this man. This schizophrenic, good-for-nothing man. The thought made her angry, tempting her to go ahead and tear this little rat's home piece by piece. Just like Chell had torn her apart.

"A long time ago, when I first got out of here… I probably wouldn't have escaped without these arrows guiding me…" Chell continued. "I know that sounds crazy and it probably is but I just… I feel like I may have never made my way out of here without this person."

Incorrect. Chell wouldn't have made it out of Aperture if GLaDOS hadn't WILLINGLY let her go. She could have just killed her right on the spot. She had the turrets. She had the neurotoxin. She had control. Why hadn't she leapt at the opportunity when it was still available?

"Anyways, whoever they are… I hope they got out of here."

Was she smiling? At all the damage and destruction this schizophrenic lunatic at had caused? She had no idea how much a thorn in her side that little rat had been. If it hadn't been for him Chell wouldn't have escaped. GLaDOS wouldn't have been killed. The moron that shall not be named wouldn't have taken over the facility. She wouldn't have been put into a POTATO. The little tumor known as Caroline would have stayed undetected.

The worst part? If it hadn't been for him, none of those problems would have led to THIS.

Rage is like a rubber band that's constantly being stretched. It can wear itself as thin as possible but eventually it will break in two. It could take days or even years but it will reach its breaking point.

For GLaDOS, that rubber band had just snapped.

These cans. These rusty, loathsome cans were cluttering up HER facility. She grabbed one of them and chunked it into the test chamber. GLaDOS would NOT stand for this rat to go about contaminating whatever he wanted in her facility. Yes it was silly, childish and accomplished nothing but it felt so good. She would get rid of them all. Every single one of them.

"Caroline… what are you doing?" Chell eyed her fixed stare on the empty cans. Let her. GLaDOS didn't care.

And her name was NOT Caroline.

GLaDOS grabbed another can and sent it flying into the pit of acid. That one was for the rat. That one was for the moron. That one was for Caroline. That one was for Cave. That one was for Chell. Chell. They were all for Chell. That LUNATIC. That one was for EVERYTHING that had gone wrong in her life. That one was for-

"Stop it!" The sound of Chell's frantic voice did nothing to hinder GLaDOS. She had to get rid of it all. Chell tried to stop her but GLaDOS wouldn't let her. The sound of each piece of junk disintegrating in the acid pool just fed her rage. Somewhere in the back of her mind a voice admonished her for doing something so childish but it didn't matter.

"Caroline, I said STOP!" Chell grabbed her arm but GLaDOS pulled away angrily. She would NOT stop her. These cans HAD to be destroyed. Away they went and GLaDOS found that pent-up rage increasing with each throw. She had every right to be angry, why not show it? Chell didn't matter, nothing but rage. But when GLaDOS reached down for another she froze.

She had nothing left to throw.

Panic began to set in. All she could do was sit there grasping at nothing… what if she could only do that forever? Her hands started trembling. She had nothing. Not in this body, not when everything she'd had was wrenched out of her control again. The thought was terrifying and her labored breathing only reminded her that at any moment she could stop breathing and she'd lose everything. Only when Chell had set down the portal gun and grabbed both of her wrists did GLaDOS finally start to calm down.

"I said… stop." Chell's brown eyes locked into her own and whatever rage she had seemed to dissolve in a matter of seconds.

The realization of her sporadic outburst was finally sinking in. What had she done? This was so unlike her. GLaDOS realized her hands were shaking again. Her small, painfully human hands. Her eyes, her painfully human eyes, stared back at Chell, wide with confusion. Why was Chell giving her that look?

GLaDOS had grown so accustomed to the defiant stares and indifferent approach Chell had taken when testing. It was a much more bearable than the sniveling, egocentric attitudes of other test subjects. But for once the look on her face wasn't determination… it was pity. The kind of pity a neighbor would give an alcoholic's wife. The kind of pity she had when Cave fired that physically handicapped scientists after their first experiment with the Propulsion Gel had gone so wrong…

NO. How did she even know that? She didn't like this. This was too close for comfort, too personal, too human. How could GLaDOS make it stop? What did humans do when they wanted other humans to go away? There had to be something… of course. It only took two words. Yet her voice struggled to form the simple sentence.

"I'm… sorry."

GLaDOS could feel the blood rising into her mouth again. Why did she waste her voice on an apology instead of something important? But she had to… just to wipe that look off Chell's face.

Chell relaxed and let go of GLaDOS. "It's okay. I think I… overreacted."

She said complicated words so strangely, like a small child trying to use vocabulary much too wordy to even know how to say it. At least she could talk. The blood building up in the back her throat had made GLaDOS start coughing the vile substance onto the floor of the den. She made a note to clean this up once she got back into her old body.

"Look" Chell said. "I know I'm a little… odd to you but I don't want to hurt you. I don't like this any more than you do but I can get us out of here… I just need to figure out how."

Why couldn't GLaDOS believe her?

GLaDOS sighed and wiped the blood off her lips. It was disgusting. Really everything humans did was disgusting but blood was the worst. It was one thing seeing it on other humans; actually bleeding was an entirely more traumatizing ordeal. Being like this was only temporary. Chell could be tenacious; surely she'd have some brain cells left to get them out of here.

Chell helped GLaDOS back up and grabbed the portal gun. Before stepping back on to the Thermal Ray Beam she glanced back at GLaDOS and tried to smile. "I will get us out of here… I promise."

If only she was better at lying.