REBEL ROSE: *lies dead on the ground*

SUMMERTIME ROSE (the BertxGee-loving, author-of-first-7-chapters-of-WotWD {read it and understand}, other half of Rebel Rose's schizophrenic brain): *sneaks into scene and prods REBEL ROSE with her pink Converse shoe*

REBEL ROSE: *suddenly, with loud dramatic gasps, comes to life*

SUMMERTIME: Hey. You're not dead!

REBEL ROSE: Why aren't you locked away in my head somewhere writing love stories about Gee and Bert?

SUMMERTIME: Because you're not DOING anything, that's why! So I decided to come out and poke you until you woke up.

REBEL: You're mean.

SUMMERTIME: *hands her coffee*

REBEL: Coffee! *dances gleefully around the beach and finally stops long enough to drink some* You're nice.

SUMMERTIME: You're random.

REBEL: You're randomer.

SUMMERTIME: Don't care. I woke you up and brought you the coffee because your fans miss you, and I'm getting bored without you. Please go write something.

REBEL: I can't. I have the worst case of writer's block ever and I can't write.

SUMMERTIME: Yes. That's why I also brought you some ideas. *pulls out ray gun, puts it to her temple, cocks it, and fires at REBEL's head*

REBEL: *mouth hangs slack, suddenly filled with inspiration* Holy shit, Summertime! All my ideas! They weren't bad, they were good, I can use these! I can use all of these! I can do this! Thaaaaank you!

SUMMERTIME: *congratulates herself, as REBEL has already left the beaches of her stagnant mind and returned to the world of written words, and the living*

Aware

I don't want to tell you what happened that day.

I don't want to tell you because I'd rather just skip ahead. I want you to know how it ends sooo much.

When I woke up that morning with his arms around my waist, I was immediately in a state of cardio hypertension…or something. I tried to be calm, because I didn't want him to wake and realize he was holding me, and let go. But it was so hard when I could feel his entire body pressed up against me, feel his warm breath on the back of my neck. My every sense was completely alert; I could hear every sound in the house, the sounds of my mom making breakfast downstairs, the sound of Gerard's warm, gentle breathing, the sound of my own racing heart.

When he woke up…it was forever before he let go of me. And that made my heart race still faster, and I kept questioning myself; was I certain he was awake, did he realize what he was doing, did he just not care? Did he…. But I didn't dare even think that question. I couldn't think something like that.

"Hey Frank?"

I nearly jumped out of my skin. I had just made up my mind that he was asleep. "What?" I asked, trying to act like that hadn't just happened. Of course he would have felt it, his entire body was against mine.

"We should do something today."

"Like what?" I asked, taking my chances and rolling over carefully in his arms. He let go of me…no. Oh em gee. He almost let go of me, his hands sliding slowly away, but one of them stopped at my waist. I don't think he was aware of what he was doing; he looked lost in thought.

"It's the last day of summer," he said. "So we should just do something. I'll call Mikey."

He propped himself up on one arm and leaned over me to the bedside table, where his phone was resting. I breathed in the sweet scent of him, his stomach inches from my face. I wanted so bad to kiss him…

Then he was lying beside me again, dialing Mikey's number. We slid apart slightly and he set the phone between us, on speaker phone.

"Hullo…?" Mikey sounded so exhausted. I think we woke him up.

"Hey, Mikes, it's Gerard."

"Gerard?" There was a sound of shifting blankets and he responded, "Why don't you go back to kissing Frank in bed and let me sleep."

Oh em gee, I wanted to hide my face, I blushed so hard, trying to laugh away the sound of my racing heart.

"Mikey, you're on speaker phone," Gerard pointed out.

There was an unsteady silence during which he and I exchanged a look of suppressed laughter, waiting for Mikey's brain to reach comprehension.

"Oh. Hey, Frank."

"Hey, Mikey," I said, trying not to let my voice shake.

"So, did you call me for a reason or are you just trying to annoy me?" Mikey asked.

"I have a reason," said Gerard, glancing up at me. "Frank and I think we should do something today, since it's the last day of summer and everything."

"Hey, it was your idea, I'm not in any way responsible for waking Mikey…" I interrupted.

"Oh, my partner in crime is backing out on me!" Gerard exclaimed.

"Hey, I'm a mercenary, I only work for a price. Risk of death by angry, sleep-deprived guy is suddenly outweighing the amount of your deposit."

"I've got…"

"Guys, focus!" shouted Mikey, and we could hear him laughing on the other end of the receiver. "Gee, what is it you wanted to do?"

"I don't know. We should call some friends or something."

I heard the door to our house slam, and I jabbed my thumb in that direction, my eyes on Gerard's. "Mom," I said, and he looked gleeful.

"We'll talk later, ok, Mikey?" he said, grabbing his phone from the bed.

"Wait…you called me to make a decision and then we didn't resolve anything? That means you woke me up for nothing!"

"Sorry, I gotta go now, bye!"

"Ge—"

"He's gonna be so mad when you get home," I laughed.

"So mad," Gerard agreed.

We left my room and sprinted down the stairs. I smacked him a quick high-five for successfully avoiding my mom, and went into the kitchen.

Gerard remembered, as I was pouring the coffee left in the maker into a mug for him, that he had several job interviews scheduled today. I offered him the coffee anyway; a normal person probably would have said goodbye and run, but Gerard took the coffee with a grateful smile, took a quick but large gulp of the hot coffee, handed me the mug, thanked me, and ran to grab his shoes. I followed him into the living room, still holding his coffee, thanking God that we had kicked our shoes under the couch the night before; Mom would have noticed shoes that weren't my own in her living room.

"If you can come over to our house in less than forty-five minutes," he was saying as he did up his laces, "then we'll figure something out with Mikey, okay?"

"Yeah, sounds good," I agreed.

He stood up and took the coffee mug from my hand, draining half the contents before handing it back with a smile. "Thank you," he said, and moved to the door. I followed him into the hallway. He gave me another quick smile before the door closed, leaving me alone in the hall.

I took a sip of the coffee, carefully placing my lips exactly over where his had been.

I was so filthy. I decided if I was going to see him again in a few minutes, I wanted to be clean. I ran upstairs to the bathroom, trying not to spill my mug of coffee, and turned on the shower. Ten minutes later I was stepping out of it, dripping wet, my hair in my eyes. I sprinted back to my room to find clean clothes. I chose black skinny jeans and a black t-shirt with a red design. I abused my eyes with red powder and descended the stairs for my shoes. Running on coffee…and probably a tiny amount of Gerard's spit…I left the house and sprinted down the street toward the crossroads. I fixed my eyes on Gerard's house then, which kept me running until I reached it. I was gasping as I came up the porch steps and knocked three times on the door. I was considering letting myself in when I heard Gerard's voice, and then Mikey saying something back… "Come on, Mikey!" Gerard shouted, and I giggled a little. Then I heard footsteps approaching, and Gerard pulled the door open.

Holy crap. His hair was dripping wet and he was wearing a towel. I nearly died.

"Ge-Gerard…" I stammered, my mind shattered.

Mikey was laughing and shouting something about revenge and Gerard was stepping aside to let me in while shouting back at Mikey. I stepped carefully in and saw Mikey was sitting on the couch playing videogames, laughing at Gerard.

"He did this because you woke him up this morning, didn't he?" I asked.

Gerard just grimaced. "Excuse me while I change out of this towel," he responded, slamming the front door and hurrying back down the hall.

"Hey, Frank," said Mikey cheerfully, waving to me briefly before refocusing on his videogame.

"That was cruel, Mikey," I teased as I sat down next to him.

"Maybe. He deserved it. I don't even know why he's going to these job interviews today, he doesn't want the jobs he's asking for."

Gerard emerged from down the hall, wearing normal jeans for once and a clean black t-shirt. His hair was still dripping and he looked absolutely gorgeous.

"So," he said, sitting down on Mikey's other side. I wished there had been room for him to sit by me. "What should we do today?"

"When will you be done with your interviews?" Mikey asked.

"Um…like three-ish, maybe. One of them's on the other side of town."

"You're filing for a job on the other side of town?"

"I really need a job, Mikey," Gerard answered, and purposely bumped Mikey's elbow at a critical point in his game.

"Hey!" Mikey shouted as he died a virtual death.

"Revenge," Gerard responded, and hid his face as Mikey dove at him.

I tried not to laugh as they wrestled back and forth, until finally they quit, Gerard pushing Mikey back into a sitting position. Mikey straightened his glasses. "So."

"Activities," said Gerard.

"You're going to be home kind of late, it's not like we can do anything in the afternoon…"

"And it's a week day. Mom and Dad won't be up for a party."

"We could go see that one horror movie we kept missing all summer."

Gerard snapped his fingers. "Yes. Brilliant, Mikey."

Mikey smiled, gratified, as Gerard looked over his shoulder at the clock. "Oh, crap, I've got to go. I'll see you guys later, okay?"

"Sure," said Mikey, his controller back in hand.

The door closed behind Gerard - again. I felt like doors were eternally closing to separate him from me.

Mikey reached across to the coffee table and grabbed another controller. "You wanna play?"

"Sure," I said, surprised.

I was expecting to do nothing today. Instead I sat on the couch killing zombies with Mikey Way. And then Gerard came home at three, looking annoyed and wanting more coffee. We called Bert and Quinn and Gee's friend Ray to see if they were interested in horror movies this evening – all of them were. Ray came to our house and we were introduced – he played guitar too, so we got along well. Bert was grounded – to which Mikey looked very unsurprised – but he was sneaking out, to which Mikey looked even more unsurprised. We all smashed ourselves into Gerard's Subaru…Gee and Toro comfortable up front, the rest of us fighting over space in the back…and went out to dinner before the movie. Dinner was fun…we almost got kicked out. I blame Bert…and the movie was brilliant. The Way brothers have good taste in horror films. Then we drove back to their house at like, ten. My mom called and I had to explain to her where I'd gone and promise I was almost home. She wasn't thrilled about my lack of communication today.

We went into the Way's house and made the place chaotic. Bert was high on his stolen freedom and got chased through the living room several times. Ray negotiated a guitar from Gerard, and sat on the end of the couch, playing as he watched the insanity unfolding around him. Then Gerard and Mikey's parents…Donald and Donna…came to remind Gerard and Mikey that it was a week night and they had to work tomorrow and some quiet would be nice. Gradually everyone left…there was lots of lingering on the doorstep and in the driveway… Then finally Gerard looked at me. "Do you wanna just walk home?" he asked me.

"Yeah," I agreed. What could be nicer than a walk in the dark on the last night of summer with Gerard Way? Nothing.

I had been telling myself through this whole day that today is the day I should tell him that I…have…these…feelings for him, and every time I see him I want to kiss him, and I think he's beautiful and talented and the greatest person I've ever met, and I love him and want to be with him every second of every day. I wouldn't actually say those things, but I kept telling myself that I had to tell him. 'Cause it was eating me up inside, being with him but unable to kiss him, not having him know what I felt. And I thought…if he didn't…like me back…I mean, I hope that he won't hate me. I don't think he's that kind of person. I think we could still be friends and everything.

But I was so afraid. I tried to build myself up inside as I walked with him, our hands nearly touching as we walked side by side; I tried to prepare and make myself believe that I was going to tell him, that I had to tell him tonight. I had thought about this all day and had been unable to do it, so now was the time…

We were at my house sooner than I ever would have thought possible. The stress was making time seem to race. We stopped before the steps of the porch. Okay, I thought. I can do this. I can say it. It's just a few words, you can do this…

I looked at him in the lamplight, taking a breath to speak, but he caught my eyes and held them with his, and I couldn't say it. He smiled and I smiled back, letting go of my determination, and then cursing myself for doing it. Focus, Frank.

"Thanks for coming with us," Gerard said.

"Thanks for inviting me," I answered. That had been so easy to say, why couldn't everything else I wanted to say be just as easy?

"I…I guess I should go. Mikey probably misses me…"

"Yeah," I said, smiling. "I guess I'll…see you later?"

"Yeah. Tomorrow."

"Okay."

He turned and he was walking away. He was walking away and I hadn't said it. I felt this horrible sinking in my heart, and I wanted to call to him but I couldn't, and I didn't know what to say if I did. "Gerard?" I asked uncertainly, the name bursting from my mouth against my will.

He was at the bottom of the drive, but he looked back at me, and our eyes met in the lamplight, and then he was coming back up the drive, quickly, and he was standing before me, and then…

And then his hands were on my face, and my heart suddenly stopped, and his lips touched gently against my mouth.

It was like…it was like all the world had stopped with the cessation of my heartbeat. Everything seemed to stand absolutely still; nothing was moving, no sounds were heard, my brain wasn't even functioning. All I knew was feeling, the feel of his lips gently kissing mine.

Gerard released me, pulling my lip a little as he drew back. He looked at my eyes with his perfect, glittering, hazel ones, questioning, uncertain, unknowing…

And then suddenly I was awake. I was aware. Suddenly I knew everything, and I knew I wasn't insane, or just now losing my mind. But maybe I was. But if I was, he was too. But it didn't matter any more, none of it mattered, because he…

"Gerard, I love you," I said honestly. I felt weak, uncontrollable even to myself.

Gerard just smiled, and leaned back in to kiss me again. This time I kissed him back, moaning with the need of him, my hands on his shoulder, his on my waist. Gerard's tongue brushed my lower lip and I realized weakly that he wanted me to let him in. I opened my lips a little more and his tongue came into my mouth, brushing against my teeth. My legs were so weak, my knees nearly giving out. I lost balance, stepping backward, and Gerard's hand slid to the small of my back to keep me from falling, never once breaking our kiss. I pressed my lips to his more firmly, feeling his tongue with mine, and then he let me into his mouth, let me do whatever I wanted. And I wanted so much. I took back my one step backward, pressing myself closer to him, needing to feel as much of him against me as I could. His hands slid under my shirt and up my stomach, giving me chills that made me gasp. He kissed the side of my mouth so he could suck on my lip ring, which was uncannily fantastic and made me extremely glad I had chose to get it. And then we stopped, needing to breathe, and Gerard pulled me against him and I rested my head on his shoulder. Our heartbeats gradually slowed in the faded lamplight. My mind was a chaotic mess, but in the center of my whirling thoughts was one that I clung to, one that was strong and that kept me sane, one that I couldn't have forgotten or put aside if I had wanted to.

Gerard loves me. I know this to be true.

"Frank," he said quietly, and I lifted my head so I could look at him. He didn't let go of me, and I didn't let go of him.

"I think maybe I owe you for staying at your house last night," he said.

I knew where Gerard was going, and I was smiling before he asked. "Do you wanna stay in mine?"

"Hellz yes," I responded, and he gave a small, crooked smile that melted my heart.

Together we walked back down the street, his hand in mine, mine in his. I felt warm and safe and uncontrollably happy.

Gerard Way loves me.

:)

Xoxo,

Rebel Rose