Tuesday, July 30, 2002

They were fortunate in three ways. First, it was a slow evening so there weren't many other patrons and they didn't need reservations. Second, they looked like an extremely attractive and well-to-do young couple. Third, they were staying at the hotel in a grand executive suite. For all these reasons they received the doting attention of the wait and service staff. They opted to sit outside since the weather was pleasant and it was empty—they had the whole patio to themselves.

They cleaned off their hands with the provided wet cloths as they waited for their waiter. They declined a starter and asked for water with their tea. Ichigo wound up ordering beef sirloin medium-rare with chimichurri sauce and a side of mashed potatoes. Rukia got beef tenderloin medium-rare with horseradish cream and a side of assorted grilled vegetables. It was as she was finishing her order that Ichigo saw something in her gaze flicker as if she'd reached a decision.

"If it wouldn't be too much trouble, could we also have a table-side bottle of plum wine?" Rukia asked.

"Of course, miss. Would you prefer Yamazaki Umeshu, or Hakkaisan ginjo?"

"Yamazaki Umeshu," she said with a smile. She didn't really know the difference, but it was actually called plum wine and that was good enough for her.

"I'll have the drinks out for you right away," the waiter said, leaving immediately with their orders.

He hadn't even seemed to consider asking for any identification and Rukia felt a little smug at how well she'd read the staff's responses to them. Technically it hadn't been an entirely empty play—Urahara had provided her and Renji with a few different IDs when they'd picked up their gigai. The one she'd picked from the selection had an age of 20 listed. If they'd carded Ichigo, well . . . but she had been sure it wouldn't have come to that.

"What are you doing?" Ichigo asked quietly with more than a little incredulity.

"Ichigo, do you remember how when we first met I told you that I was around ten times your age? That means not only am I legally of age to drink literally everywhere, but also that you should trust me when I tell you to live a little," Rukia said, smiling at him with only a slightly patronizing look.

"And you called me a delinquent for picking a lock," he muttered. "What if he'd called your bluff?"

"Don't be ridiculous," she said, lifting an eyebrow at him approvingly. "What kind of 17-year-old looks like that? They probably think we're fashion models or something, don't worry about it."

He fumed a bit at her hypocrisy but didn't complain further. Her version of high praise of his appearance wasn't lost on him. In any event the waiter was returning with all their drinks.

"Confidence will always take you a long way," Rukia said after the waiter left. She started to open the bottle.

"You know that with how you just said all that you sound like an older woman trying to get me drunk while giving me 'advice', right?" Ichigo said dryly with an up-quirked eyebrow.

Rukia turned bright red at his assertion but continued trying to open the bottle even as she became enormously flustered. "Th—That's not what I meant at all and you know it!" she exclaimed. She would've kicked him but it wasn't the venue and more importantly the table didn't easily permit it with how it was structured. Still, she wasn't willing to cause a big scene over it, not that night.

Ichigo leaned forward and took the bottle out of her hands, opening it easily. "Now who's a fool?" he asked idly, glancing up at her with a small smile.

"Don't push your luck, Ichigo," she hissed.

He took her glass, put some ice cubes into it from the metal pail of them they'd been provided, did the same for his own glass, and poured some of the plum wine into both. He placed her glass in front of her and set the bottle and ice bucket off to one side of the table.

"Are you sure you haven't done this before?" she asked with a hint of skepticism, her blush fading as she watched him.

Ichigo ignored the second opening at mocking her commentary and lifted his glass to a toasting position as he said "Never."

Rukia picked up her glass and clinked it against his. "To reunions."

"To confidence," he replied. "Kampai!"

She looked away from him as she sipped at the wine in mild annoyance at his sudden display of the same in making fun of her.

Ichigo lifted the glass to his lips and took a drink, smelling it as he did so. It was a bit dry but a pleasant mix of sweet and sour and had odd notes of vanilla that contrasted with the plum. He found he actually liked it. Rukia seemed similarly pleased with it. He set the glass aside for awhile, sipping at his water. Even if he indulged her by drinking—and the plum wine wasn't that strong—he knew he should only really start after having something on his stomach.

There wasn't long to wait; their dishes arrived rather quickly. They both began to cut up their steaks and sampled them along with the sides and sauces; they were divine. He motioned that they should try one another's as well, and both found they liked what the other had ordered too. The food was simply too good to converse over and so they wound up dismantling the steaks and digging in silently.

The waiter checked in on them occasionally in a Western fashion only to always catch them with their mouths full, so Ichigo took to just giving him a thumbs-up.

After he'd demolished the steak and potatoes Ichigo sat for a moment savoring the aftertaste. He cleansed his palette with the water and then took a long drink of the plum wine that was distinguishable from a gulp only in how long it took. Somehow, although the ice had diluted it, it tasted much richer. He set the glass down. "That was . . . the best steak ever."

Rukia was still eating but gave him a look that basically communicated 'tell me about it'.

He let her finish and sipped at the plum wine, continuing to revel in how ridiculous their circumstances were. Compared to how he'd been eating last week the yakitori they'd had after meeting up had been great; their current meal was like being on some other planet. It was almost as if . . . a memory hit him with the force of a train: his father saying You're way too young to be burdened by something cool like sadness. He was suddenly staring into the distance in thought.

"Ichigo?" Rukia asked after a minute. She'd seen his expression turn instantly from celebratory to moody.

He looked back to her and gave a wan smile, saying "I was just thinking of something, that's all." He'd only narrowly avoided putting 'sorry' at the front of it.

She gave him a small assuaging smile before taking a drink of the wine. He saw then that she'd finished her meal. "If you're worried about ruining the mood, don't be," she said, "I didn't ask for the wine to get you drunk . . . 'To confidence', remember?"

Ichigo glanced at the glass in his own hand before looking back to Rukia. "Liquid courage, huh?"

"I thought it might help," she said, "for both of us." Her tone was gentle.

Ichigo looked at her for a moment before lifting the glass and polishing it off in a single swig. He gave himself more ice before pouring another.

"Fool, I just said this wasn't about getting drunk!" Rukia berated as her eyes went a bit wide at his action.

"Don't talk down to me just because I haven't had alcohol before," Ichigo said hotly, "Even if I abided by the law, I'm not the sort of person who has no idea about such things!" He took a sip of the undiluted wine for comparison's sake before setting it aside, switching to water and then nursing his tea for awhile.

She studied him for awhile as he walked himself through whatever it was he'd learned from his peers about knowing one's limits. At the same time she was continuing to gradually work her way through her own glass. She let out a soft exhalation once she was down to the bottom third of the glass and tipped it back. Maybe he had a point. If it was really there to help there was no point in being timid about it.

Ichigo looked up from their seating area. The restaurant was on the 6th floor on the northeast side of the main tower, nestled in between it and the massive Mori Tower next door. There were outdoor seating areas for some of the other restaurants adjoining them, but they were unoccupied. It was oddly intimate for such a large space by virtue of that. It was just him and Rukia. His attention was drawn back to her by the sound of ice on glass; she was pouring herself another drink.

It was then that their waiter returned yet again, asking "May I get anything else for the two of you tonight?" as he collected their plates.

"Yes, if we could have another bottle, a refill of water, and the check, please?" Rukia said with a winning smile. Her tone and the nature of her request made it subtly clear those would be the last things they would need from him and they would afterwards prefer not to be disturbed. The waiter bowed, left, and returned with the requested items. Rukia tendered her card and with only the slightest curious glance at the fact she was the one paying, he disappeared again to return with the receipt before leaving them be. She signed it and set it aside. Tipping wasn't a thing that was done, even at a Western-owned establishment.

They sat quietly with one another for awhile, building and monitoring their individual progressions. At 660 milliliters the bottle was only good for about six thin drinks or four stout ones, and they'd been generous. As they finished their second ones they both had a faint blush; Ichigo was fit enough that even with no previous experience or tolerance he could handle it; Rukia wasn't much of a drinker but it was far below her capabilities even accounting for her size. He topped both of them up again and then they ignored the drinks, regarding one another.

"I really did think it was the end," Ichigo said eventually. He did so without any remorse, like it was just a fact. "Since I've got no reiryoku . . . well, I don't know what'll happen, but I figured . . . I figured I would just have to live out my life trying to manage as best as I could, and eventually I would wind up in Rukongai and take stock then. Either I would have an aptitude again and I could make it into the Seireitei or I would just be out there until one day I wasn't anymore," he said.

Rukia said nothing and watched him.

"All of this . . . gets taken away from us. I mean, that's true even if you don't know about Hollows or Shinigami so it's no excuse not to live, but once you know there's another side, another part to the story, it becomes really easy to think of this as an extended training session. The stakes aren't quite so high anymore. There's not as much of a need to rush or worry about small things," he continued, "The best thing you can do is try not to trouble others too much while preparing yourself." He took a drink of water for a moment, thinking things through before looking her right in the eyes. "You know my dad's a Shinigami, right?"

She glanced down at the table in wordless acknowledgement. She'd suspected something was off about the Kurosaki family since the first day she'd met them. When she and all his other friends had arrived in Karakura after the defeat of Aizen she'd felt Isshin's reiatsu. It'd been incredibly weak and she'd only barely noticed it, but it'd stood out against the others she knew for its very unfamiliarity. When she'd become a fukutaichō, she'd done some digging and . . .

"He's the one who taught me the technique that . . ." he trailed off. He wasn't willing to get into that at the same time. "Anyway," he resumed, "when the battle was transitioning from the fake Karakura to the real one, things looked pretty bad. At one point he asked me 'Will you sit there and cry that you couldn't protect anyone?', and I've been thinking about that ever since." He paused to take a long drink of the plum wine. Explaining everything forced him to wander across subjects and the alcohol both was and wasn't helping.

She found herself mimicking the action, and when she looked at him again he was staring into her eyes as if he could see right through her.

"I never told you about how things were before my mom died, even after everything that happened," he said, "and I didn't tell you how that changed things. The most important thing to know is that she was like the sun, and we were all in her orbit. Without her . . . we had to orbit each other, or we'd have flown apart. And so without ever discussing it, without so much as a word on the subject, we took up roles. My role was to protect. And now . . . I can't do that really. I haven't been able to." He paused again, switching to water once more.

Rukia glanced away so she wouldn't stare at him in sympathy again. She thought back to her feelings in the Senzaikyū, comparing them to how she'd treated him upon her return to Karakura. She'd misjudged him so tremendously, and had resolved to never do it again. To see him like this rekindled that pitying feeling once more, but she wouldn't insult his honor in such a way again after the incident in Shinjuku.

"But," Ichigo said with a sudden shift in attitude, "I thought about what my dad said to me then and I thought about Karin. Karin wasn't handy like Yuzu, or hardy like me, or a joker like dad, so she decided her role was to never make us worry no matter what. She was like the ultimate straight-man, the perfect tsukkomi." He sounded both proud and sort of cocky as he said "I'm not stupid; I know she's been going to see Urahara to help out with Hollows and Pluses. So . . . now I'm the one who's never supposed to make people worry, no matter what!"

Rukia's eyes were drawn back to his at the iron in his voice and she felt them widen a bit at how determined his gaze was.

Ichigo met her look and focused on her as he said "And that's why I resolved . . . it sounds stupid when I say it after something dramatic like that, but I saw this famous martial arts movie sometime after on TV, and the hero, he had this line about 'the art of fighting without fighting', and so that's what I resolved to do! Even if I have no reiryoku, no reiatsu, no zanpakutō, no anything, I will continue on!"

Her mouth fell open a bit at his intensity. It was very much Ichigo as she had always thought of him in her heart. It filled her with pride to see him so. You—you're not even sad at any of this at all, are you, you idiot? If anything you're . . .

He took his wine cup in hand and finished it in a single drink, setting it down firmly on the table as he leaned forward to look at Rukia more closely. "So now you can see why your search and all of that was a problem for me. It makes me happy that Soul Society is concerned about me—maybe that means that someday or somehow I can get my reiryoku back—but I'm already resolved to keep fighting! I'll stand by everyone however I can until both my body and soul die!" he said with a confident grin.

Rukia abruptly jerked her head to the left as if she'd been physically slapped by the memory he invoked. The words and the attitude were yet again all-too-close to something Kaien had once told her and the talk of Isshin's status had primed her with the thought that . . . she'd instinctively turned such that her hair would still hide her eyes and some token errant thought of hers congratulated itself that she'd only pinned one side of it back. She told herself that it was the wine loosening her inhibitions as she squeezed her eyes shut to keep away tears she could feel forming at their corners.

Ichigo blinked at the sudden motion and felt rising concern in his gut. "Hey, Rukia, are you—was it something I—" he began.

"I'm fine," she said, grasping her water glass and taking a drink. Neither her voice nor her hand trembled in the slightest. She turned back to him with an apologetic smile but her eyes still betrayed her. "It was just a sudden stomach cramp. I think the steak was too good; I ate too quickly," she covered with a small laugh.

His expression gradually softened and he sat back up fully. Even so, he knew her well enough to know when she was lying to him. His dad's words echoed in his mind again but with a different emphasis than how he'd actually said them: You're way too young to be burdened by something cool like sadness. His mind turned to the start of dinner as he smiled at her. "Drinking so quickly probably isn't helping, you know," he chastised to cover his thoughtfulness. Rukia . . . what happened to you in the past that's stained you with so much pain . . . and why do I remind you of it?

She drew up an annoyed expression, pointing at him "Like you're one to talk, making drunken declarations like that!"

"I'm not drunk," he said, glowering back at her a bit. He added a "Tch" for theater and finished off what was left of his tea.

"Ichigo," Rukia said after awhile to draw his attention, her tone somewhat more serious. He looked to her and she sighed lightly before continuing. "This isn't my turn, it's just some things you deserve to know. First, I only fully knew about your father after the war was over, so please don't think I was concealing that from you from the start. Second, the way that we were keeping tabs on you was your badge. In addition to everything else, it functions as a transmitter: it's constantly relaying information on the user's position and reiatsu. It can also function as a communication device, either one-way or two-way. When you put it away—"

"Don't worry about it," he said, cutting her off.

"Eh?" she asked, her eyes widening a bit in surprise.

"That kind of thing doesn't matter," he said, meeting her gaze. "I don't doubt your intentions and since Soul Society has asked you to be here I don't doubt theirs either."

Rukia's expression became a little softer and she gave him a small but keen smile. She looked almost impressed at his maturity.

"Anyway, that was all kind of heavy for dinner," Ichigo said casually, "so let's just enjoy finishing this wine and get back, yeah?"

"A true romantic," Rukia scoffed, finishing her glass and pouring out the last of the second bottle equally between them.

"You really need to knock it off with that stuff, people will get the wrong idea," Ichigo muttered. They sat with each other largely in silence, enjoying the company of one another over their last drinks.

Ichigo flopped backwards onto his bed, feeling like he was sloshing around a bit at the sudden lack of motion. It had been the second bottle—the second bottle had been the one to watch out for. He'd been drinking far too quickly while giving his speech. Even something weak like plum wine could add up.

"Don't fall asleep in your suit!" Rukia admonished.

"But it's the true salaryman experience," Ichigo said airily as he closed his eyes. He opened them again as it became clear from the motion of the bed that Rukia was sitting down on the edge of it next to him.

She turned her head over her shoulder and pointed at the dress. "Can you help me unzip this?" She could tell from his expression how he'd taken it and swatted him only somewhat less hard than usual in deference to his state. "It wasn't an offer, you fool! It's just that I can't reach the zipper easily!"

Ichigo grumbled and reached up from his position, bringing his hands up to the back of her dress. He found the concealed zipper and pulled it down to where it ended right at the bottom of her lower back. Due to his position and the backless nature of the dress his fingers wound up brushing against her skin and he found himself looking away in embarrassment at how soft and warm she was. She got up the moment he was done and said only "Thank you," as she went to the bathroom to change.

He just lay on the bed and closed his eyes again.

She surprised him by coming out again relatively quickly in her pajamas. "You're not going to be sick, are you?" she asked as she moved to hang the dress up in the closet they'd agreed was hers. There was an unusual note of concern in her voice.

"No," he replied. He was quite sure he wasn't, he was just oddly tired and didn't care to move. "I'm shocked you're not hogging the greatest shower in the world."

"I showered before we left so it's fine, I just had to wash the makeup off," she replied. With that she was once more standing beside his bed and was pulling him up into a sitting position. She was surprisingly strong given her size and weight. "Plus it means you can't fall asleep like this. Come on, you're going to have to get up."

Ichigo pushed himself up mostly to spite her and stood, making his way over to the bathroom door.

"Do you need help getting undressed?" Rukia called after him. It sounded only halfway like she was teasing. The other half was more of that same concern.

"Make up your mind about whether you're propositioning me or not!" he shot back as he got inside and closed the door behind him. He made sure to turn the fan on to obscure any sound he made. It did prove trickier to get undressed than he imagined. "Damn woman gets me drunk illegally and then has the nerve to make fun of me for it," he muttered.

After moderate struggle he managed to hang the suit back up on its hanger properly. He could only assume she'd moved it in there for him because it certainly hadn't been there before. At last he was free to receive the tender mercies of the rain shower. He was sitting beneath it when he heard her call through the door "You better not fall asleep in there either!"

"You wish!" he snapped to be heard above the water. Sometime later he finished, dressed, brushed his teeth, and opened the door. Rukia had all the lights off and was lying on top of her blankets considering the city. He saw she'd pulled back his bed's covers and blankets for him and almost found it endearing. He plotted his course before turning off the bathroom fan and lights, setting off in the dark. "Don't you even dare offer to help me," he warned as he transited in front of her, "The effect started wearing off by the end of the shower." He slipped into bed and pulled the covers over himself.

Rukia said nothing for awhile before asking "Ichigo, it was fun, right?"

What she heard in response sounded like "Yeah; go to sleep."

She watched the lights of Tokyo as she listened to his breathing. Awhile after the sound became regular she slowly got up walked over to his bed, tucking him in properly. She found she couldn't help but smile a little at his sleeping face. He looked peaceful. She then went and closed the blinds in both rooms before returning to her bed, lying back onto it as she had before. She pulled her soul pager out from the sheets and began to write her first report to Ukitake.

Even after she finished, hit send, and crawled under the covers it was a long time before she fell asleep.