Chapter 6- February 13th
"Geez, you'd think that Shikamaru was a JOUNIN judging by how long his stupid mission has been lasting!" Ino said to Chouji as the two of them walked to the appointed place where the torture would commence on the morning of February 13th. "It's been a week and a half… almost two weeks! No one goes on a mission for THAT long!"
"I think he went all the way to the Sand Village." Chouji said.
"Why?" said Ino. "Why did they have to send Shikamaru to the Sand Village? What's going on over there?"
"I think it was a diplomatic mission." Chouji shrugged.
"So I repeat my question." Said Ino. "Why Shikamaru?"
Chouji shrugged again. "There were a bunch of other people on the mission too. I think Shikamaru was just one of the designated chuunins of the group."
"Hey…" said Ino. "Why do you know all these details of the mission?" Ino demanded. "Shikamaru wouldn't tell me anything even after I bothered him endlessly and even threatened his life!"
"Uh…well…" Chouji started just as they arrived at the training grounds where certainly no training would occur. Chouji didn't have the heart to tell Ino that all he did was ask Shikamaru what his mission was about and Shikamaru easily told him. Chouji guessed that Shikamaru just liked annoying Ino, just like he also guessed that Ino liked telling Shikamaru how lazy he was.
Chouji also didn't have the heart to tell Ino that Shikamaru had gotten back from his mission the night before. When Chouji told Shikamaru that everyone had to make Valentine's Day cards today, Shikamaru just plainly said, "Tell them I'm still on my mission."
Chouji wasn't going to LIE, so he'd just dance around the question and say things like, "I think he went to the Sand Village!" or "I think it was a diplomatic mission!" or "Shikamaru was just one of the designated chuunins in the group!" or some other equally useless piece of information!
"WELCOME students!" said Asuma. "Nice of you to show up! Everyone else has already begun!"
It was quite obvious that the students had separated themselves according to gender. That sort of thing happens naturally, especially when doing something like making Valentines.
"Shikamaru's not back from his mission yet?" Kiba asked as Chouji sat down.
"It was in the Sand Village." Chouji answered.
Akamaru barked and Kiba nodded. "My sister was there when he got back last night." Kiba said.
Chouji swallowed hard.
"Uh…well…last I heard…" Chouji stuttered.
"Less talk!" said Gai as he sprinted over. "More Valentine making!"
Everyone grumbled. It was bad enough that they had to make Valentines, but now that they had the knowledge that Shikamaru was getting out of it, it made it that much worse.
"So, who are you girls making Valentines for?" sang Sakura as she cut out a giant red heart.
"I'm making one for Sasuke!" said Ino.
"I'm making FIVE for Sasuke!" Sakura said.
Ino frowned. "Oh, so it's a competition you want?" she challenged.
"You're on!" Sakura declared. Instantly, both of them started working on their Valentines at top speed.
Tenten sighed at the pathetic sight and then looked at Hinata who was shyly folding some paper so she could cut a symmetrical heart.
"Who's that for?" Tenten asked curiously.
"Oh!" said Hinata as she nearly cut the heart in half. "No one really… our teachers told us we had to make cards so I'm just making them for whoever…"
"No way." Said Tenten.
"What?" Hinata said, turning red.
"When you make a Valentine, you have to have someone specific in mind or else it's just pointless!" Tenten said. "It has to be for a specific person so you can personalize the card to fit that person specifically!"
Hinata looked down at her symmetrical heart. Then she looked at the white piece of paper Tenten had folded in half. "Who is that for?" she questioned.
"I haven't decided yet…" Tenten said dreamily.
Meanwhile, at the table with much more testosterone, there were more problems with making cards than one thought possible. For one, most people didn't even want to make the cards, and others just didn't have feelings for a person in that way… at least not that they were going to admit.
"If we're being forced to make Valentines but are not required to give them out then I'll just make a Valentine for myself." Said Sasuke.
"What's the point?" said Lee. "Every girl in the village is going to give you a Valentine! If anyone should make a Valentine for himself, it should be ME because I've NEVER gotten a Valentine before!"
Everyone was instinctively sad about this.
"I'll just make a Valentine and throw it away as soon as our teachers dismiss us." Neji said.
"Here here!" cheered a few other men.
"Not me!" said Naruto. "I'm making a card for my beloved Sakura!"
"I'm making a card for Sakura as well!" said Lee.
"I'm making a card for YOU, Shino!" said Kiba.
Everyone was quiet and then moved away from Kiba… but especially Shino.
"Geez, I was only kidding." Said Kiba.
"Yeah right." Said Naruto.
"I don't sway that way." Kiba said. "I just wanted to throw a pointless comment in since I do that all the time. It's all your fault for not learning to ignore me by now."
"Still, Kiba, don't make me a Valentine." Shino ordered.
"I already said I was kidding." Kiba said as if Shino was being ridiculously persistent about his request.
"Out of sheer curiosity, Shino, who are you going to make a card for?" Sasuke questioned.
"For my secret lover whom I am engaged to." Shino answered.
Pause.
"Okay…" said everyone slowly.
"I was kidding." Shino said. "I'm making one for my bugs."
Pause.
"Okay…" said everyone slowly.
"I was kidding again." Shino said.
"Stop that!" said Kiba. "It's okay for me to be kidding but you kidding is just weird! Especially twice in a row! Tell us what you're REALLY doing because now I really want to know!"
"I'm doing the same as you guys are." Said Shino. "I'm making a random card and throwing it away upon returning home."
"Oh." Said everyone with a satisfied shrugged.
The group then all looked over at the girl table because they had heard some of the ruckus and had began to grow curious over what could be occurring over there. They saw enormously tall piles that reached to the sky of hundreds of Valentines, all of which were personalized and different, while Ino and Sakura worked vigorously on doubling their pile's size. Hinata and Tenten, meanwhile, were busy trying to keep their heads above the mess so they wouldn't drown in the love.
Sasuke turned around and shook his head. "I don't know what they're trying to prove." He said.
"ONE of those has GOT to be for me!" said Naruto ambitiously.
"You know you're rock bottom when you look at a stack of Valentine's that huge and say, 'One of those have got to be for me' when you secretly know deep down in your heart that none of them are for you." Said Kiba. "Ever."
"It's not so secret." Lee agreed.
"HEY!" said Naruto. "I KNOW that many of them are for me! Why, I wouldn't be surprised if they were ALL for me! Hey, Sasuke, what makes you think they're all for you!"
Sasuke looked at Naruto as if he were stupid. "Well," he said finally. "It's a wild guess."
"Damn straight it is." Said Naruto with a confident nod.
Everyone cleared their throats and tried not to look.
Meanwhile, the teachers were lounging about creating their own Valentines.
"I have finished making my Valentine!" said Gai as he held up the most enormous, lacey, and ridiculously glittered and decorated heart Valentine IN THE WORLD. "But none of you can see it until Valentine's Day tomorrow!"
Kurenai secretly KNEW that this Valentine was for her.
"I've made mine too." Said Kakashi.
Kurenai secretly knew this one was for her as well.
"As have I." Asuma finished.
Kurenai knew this one was for her too. Secretly.
As for Kurenai, she was still living in the past. She made Valentines for pretty much everyone she knew and when she got home, she was going to tape a Hershey's Kiss to each one of them so everyone would remember that her Valentines were SPECIAL and made with LOVE!
"I'm finished too!" said Kurenai as she put her Valentines in a bag.
"STUDENTS!" yelled Gai as he stood up on a chair. He figured that since the four of them were done then everyone else was done as well! "You are now dismissed for the day! What you do tomorrow is up to you, though we highly suggest you pass out the Valentines you made today!"
"That's right!" said Kurenai. "We will not make sure you pass out your Valentines! Tomorrow you are free for LOVE!"
"We will be celebrating Random Acts of Kindness Month on February 21st." Kakashi added.
"That's right!" said Asuma. "So bring your kindness with you on that day!"
The students rose from their seats and exited stage left. As they passed the designated trash receptacle, many people just tossed out the piece of garbage they had channeled very little energy into, though there was a small portion of folks who remained hopeful that their secret (or not so secret) crush would receive the Valentines and confess their love right there on the spot.
Which would soon lead into holding hands, then dating, then making love, then marriage, then children and then growing old, and eventually dying together and having their graves next to each other. Which would, OF COURSE, finish with their souls floating together among the cosmos.
All because of a little Valentine.