Chapter 6: Switch (PruAus)
They called him a fool a thousand times already.
They said he was a fool for denying the offers of big shot companies who wanted to hire him for his services. He simply chose to serve on the local hospital of his childhood town. They said he was a fool for turning down the love of a certain Hungarian woman with a rich background. They called him a fool for burying his musical talent under the pretense of studying and work.
Roderich Edelstein didn't mind being a fool in their eyes though, not one bit at all.
Yes, indeed, it's been a long time since he played the piano, which was collecting dust somewhere in his house. Roderich made his decision when he told himself that he needed to be a psychiatrist. Now that he had the right to practice his knowledge he didn't glance to even one of the letters sent to him. No, he had only one place in mind to offer his services. He had returned back from where he came from.
As for the love confession, Roderich never had any romantic feelings towards Elizaveta. For him, she was just a friend. A great friend. His heart already belonged to someone else. One of the things he was still regretting was the fact that he hadn't done anything.
"Good morning, Dr. Edelstein." One of the nurses greeted him as he entered the hospital.
A mental hospital was not really an ideal place for a reunion but this was where Roderich could find the long lost love of his life. It had been a few months when he managed to be the doctor of the patient in room 305.
"Good morning." Roderich answered back and the nurse immediately handed to him a clip board with the list of today's objectives.
"The patient in room 305 refuses to eat his breakfast again, Dr. Edelstein."
"…why?"
"He said he won't eat until we send him back home. Also, he was insisting that he want to see his little brother." There was a hint of sympathy behind the nurse's eyes.
Home. Funny how ironical that sounded in Roderich's ears.
"I'll talk to him, force feeding the patient is never a good impression."
Gilbert Beilschmidt was the name of the patient inside room 305. He was admitted for having Dissociative Identity Disorder and delusions.
Another one of Roderich's regrets was that why he didn't notice anything the signs back then. Everything he always did was too late. It was too late when Roderich received the news that Gilbert's parents were abusive to him and to his little brother, Ludwig. It was too late when helped arrived for the Beilschmidt siblings. Both Gilbert and Ludwig were beaten enough that the younger one died before his brother's eyes. When the little blond was no longer moving was the time the police arrived and captured the people responsible for the hurts.
By that time too, Gilbert's mind already collapsed. The self proclaimed 'awesome' was no more. That was the diagnosis said.
Roderich entered the room 305 and was not surprised to be greeted by a glare from the person sitting on the bed.
"Good morning to you too, Gilbert." Roderich adjusted his glasses to have a better position.
"Tch. How many times will I tell you that my name is 'Prussia' not this human name you keep insisting on calling me? Damn, I can't believe that a time will come where the awesome me would rather have the young master's company. At least Austria calls me by my name. Unlike you, who not only looked like Austria but also acted like him sometimes."
Roderich sighed. He would never understand what kind of fantasy was woven inside Gilbert's mind. From the information he had gathered so far, in Gilbert's perspective everyone he knew was some kind of personified countries. Even people he hadn't meet.
For example, Gilbert believed that he was the nation of Prussia and Roderich was Austria. What made the matter worst, was that Gilbert still believed that Ludwig was still alive. That his little brother was already a full grown man and not some eight year old kid and that Ludwig's name was Germany.
"I'm afraid once more again. Now, the nurse told me that you refused to eat breakfast. You know, you can't skip meals right?"
"Ha! I can survive without eating for a week! I've been through much worse in my life and not eating is just easy as breathing air!"
Roderich didn't know if Gilbert's delusions were speaking right now or if it was the truth. He would not be surprised if it was the latter though. The mind was such a curious place.
"Now I can't allow that to happen, can I? Either you eat or I will force you. And I know you don't want to be treated as a child." Roderich raised an eyebrow and he knew that he had already won the case before him from the way Gilbert scowled but still weighing his options. Despite not knowing the lines between reality and fantasy, Roderich's ways to convince Gilbert in doing something was still working towards the albino patient.
"Fine! Only because I am so awesome you can't let me starve to death!"
A dangerous glint passed Roderich's eyes and he whispered, "I've never planned to allow you to die in the first place."
The day would end with no progress just like any day since Gilbert was admitted in the hospital. Roderich could still not make the love of his life remember the reality. That his name was Gilbert Beilschmidt and not 'Prussia', not a country that did not exist anymore. Why did Gilbert chose a country like 'Prussia' to represent in his fantasy? Did that mean that Gilbert thought it was better if he had not existed at all?
Whenever the night had fallen, Roderich would check up on Gilbert and watched him sleep.
"Why did I never say the most important words to you?" Roderich kneeled beside the sleeping patient and caressed his face, "Gilbert, my love, please…come back to me…I…I love you." And just like any night, Roderich would silently cry beside the one that he loved the most.
In another place, in another world, a piano could be heard.
Playing such a beautiful yet sorrowful tone was none other than Austria himself. Once he finished his latest original piece he looked at his sole audience. Someone who was physically there but mentally not.
"What can you say about the music?"
Austria knew that he would never receive an answer. His companion simply stared into nothingness.
"Is it still not enough, Prussia?"
What happened during the time behind the wall that the strong personification of Prussia was rendered into someone like this?
Prussia didn't move from the couch where he was sitting. The light blue blanket loosely covered his whole body, from head to toe that his face was the only place clearly seen. His eyes remain glassy, as if he had no soul left inside his body.
Austria stood up and kneeled in front of the motionless body. He took Prussia's hands and kissed each fingers one by one.
"Prussia, my love, please come back to me…"
No one would know that Gilbert Beilschmidt was already dead. No one would really know that Prussia was still alive and responsive. All because some higher power was bored enough to play with their lives.