Wooop! Cheers for all the magnificent and well spelt reviews lol. Seriously, no errors. :p I love you all!
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters of The Mighty Boosh OR Dora the Explorer. But I will one day ;) (just Dora though lol)
Off we go...

"..You can lead the way! Duh-duh-Dora-Duh-duh-duh-Dora…"

Howard groaned. Vince had gotten bored with most of the toys in the parcel Naboo had left and moaned for a good half an hour until the older man had caved and stuck the telly on, and found… shudder, 'Dora The Explorer'. How any self respecting three year old could watch that Howard had no idea. However, Vince was watching avidly, and joining in with any songs, Spanish or when Dora said something pointless like, 'Say how many sticks you can see!'

There was no point trying to get up and do something constructive, however, as Vince was sat on him. He preened a little that Vince always wanted to be with him, but it got quite tiresome, especially when the guy was shouting out to Dora.

"Can you say, largo?"

"Largo!!"

"Vince, maybe you should shout louder, Dora might not be able to hear you" Howard said sarcastically. Vince turned to look at him and cocked his head to the side.

"Oh. LARGO!!"

"Muy Bein!" Vince looked at Howard and his eyes sparkled.

"Thanks Howard! She said 'well done' in Spanish!" Howard laughed and patted him on the back, not pointing out that Dora would have said 'muy bein' even if Vince had shouted "Dora's a transvestite!".

After another five minutes of torture, during which he got hit in the eye as Vince pretended to row a boat, he had had enough and tipped Vince off him.

"Hey!" A disgruntled cry came up from the floor. Howard simply laughed again and said,

"You hungry?" Vince hurriedly got up and ran towards him

"Yeah! What is there?" Howard rifled through the cupboards and had a little think to himself.

"We could have spaghetti, cheese on toast..." He looked round to see Vince had an apalled look on his face "What?"

"We already had that stuff! We can't have it again!" Howard raised an eyebrow

"Is that so? Why not?" Vince just gave him an angry look that suggested Howard was stupid

"You just can't!!" His voice had almost risen to a shout

"Hey, calm down! If you want, we could go out to get something different". Vince gave him that angry/disgusted look and whined

"But I'm hungry NOW!" God he was being difficult today. What was his problem? Looking down, he saw Vince rubbing his eyes and moaning. Ah.

"I think, you should have a nap" He cringed backwards as Vince's eyes got a fiery look in them

"I'm not tired! I'm hungry!!". He proceeded to sit down cross legged and burst into tears. Gathering him up, Howard rocked him slightly and started humming. He was amazed that a tune came out, rather than scat. Whatever he was doing was calming Vince down. He kept it up as he took Vince into their bedroom and set him down on his (Howard's) bed. Still humming, he combed his hand through Vince's hair. After only three minutes of this, Vince dropped off to sleep, leaving a frazzled Howard to go back into the living room.

--

He sat down tiredly, and started thinking hard. He was sure he could have dealt with this Vince easily. It wasn't as if he didn't act like a child anyway. But then he started thinking harder. Actually, Vince rarely acted like that much of a child anymore. He'd grown much more sarcastic, he wasn't as naive and innocent. Howard was stupid to think that this wouldn't be any different. Of course three year olds are childish, but they weren't that far away from babies. They cry, get cranky after no sleep, hell they probably even still wet the bed. Hell. When was the last time Vince had declared to the room he needed to use the bathroom?

Howard had to move fast. Forgetting how embarrassing it would be to wake his best friend up to use the toilet would be, he literally ran to the bedroom, only to find Vince sitting bolt upright on the bed, twisting the corners of the duvet cover and looking very sheepish. Of dear god, please don't say he has...

"Vince? Are...are you ok?" Vince looked away but Howard saw him biting his lip. "Hey little man, have you...erm...y'know..." His sentance was left hanging as he gazed at Vince. The younger man looked up at Howard apologetically and was bright red.

"I'm sorry Howard!! I was going to go, I swear, but then I fell asleep..." He looked down once more, and Howard started cursing himself. One, because he made Vince go to bed, Two, because Vince felt the need to apologize and Three, Oh God, he'd left Vince on his bed...

He tried to pull himself together. Vince needed him right now, and he couldn't go off one. Oh God, they were his best sheets...

--

Half an hour later he had Vince bathed and changed, the sheets washed and changed (He was getting better at this, straight in the bath, no messing about) and was now patting himself on the back, sat on the sofa. Vince was again sat on the floor, this time playing extremely quietly with some lego. Apparently he wanted to make up for what had happened earlier.

The phone rang and the lego peices that weren't attached yet fell to the floor as Vince gave out a terrified squeak.

"Vince relax, it's just the phone" Howard soothed, and reached over to pick it up.

"Hello?"

"Howard? It's Naboo, look I have to make this quick, because I have to keep tending to this potion"

"I thought you had a week?"

"I found this other potion, that works the same, except he won't remember anything. I thought I'd give you a heads up, we should be back tomorrow, but I need you to get something to make it work properly"

Howard tried to process this information. Vince wouldn't remember anything they'd done together? Still, he mused, at least he wouldn't go through the embarrassment of knowing he'd actually wet himself in front of his best friend.

"Howard? You better still be there..."

"I'm here Naboo, that sounds good. What do you need?"

"Well, don't fly off the handle, but I need some of Vince's blood"

"What?!"

"Not right at this minute, but tomorrow, I'm gonna try to get some of his blood, so I'm just warning you"

"Why did you say you wanted me to get it?"

"Well, you just think of a way to distract him when I do it. Bollo don't put that one in! Look I'm going to have to go, see you tomorrow"

Naboo hung up, leaving Howard feeling more lost than ever. How could he tell his three year old best friend that he needed to take some blood? looking at him, sat there cross legged, giggling quietly as he made some kind of car with the bricks, Howard wanted to cry. His parental instincts were kicking in, and his mind was telling him that he couldn't let Naboo hurt his child.

What? Did he just refer to Vince as HIS child? Relax, he told himself, it's just because you're tired, and he's depending on you alot more... Still, it would be quite hard to just forget about all this, and go back to treating Vince like before...

Oooh! It's getting interesting! (Hopefully lol) Hope y'all checked out my other story, it's just a oneshot though. Reviews are given silk cushions to sit on, and fed jammy dodgers :)
I seriously love you all ;)
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