(A/N: It's been almost a month since I've updated, sorry for that, was busy with a huge exam. I hope you like this, and do review!)
"Ted, aren't you going to pick Robin up from the airport?" Lily didn't look up from the parents' letters she was drafting, she and Ted were early, sitting at their usual booth in MacLaren's. He was reading one of his thick, dry architecture books, a beer in hand, while she had a lone glass of plain water sitting next to her hand. He paused for a moment and flicked through his planner, which was full of neat notes in black ink. A sheepish look started to form across his face, and Lily sighed. "You've forgotten that Robin's four-week posting's over, haven't you."
"Well, I wrote it down... She comes in early tomorrow, so it's fine, though she says there may be some changes in her flight details, so she'll drop me a text or something. But what about Barney?"
Barney hadn't been Barney, or at least, he hadn't been the Barney they'd come to recognise in the years they'd known him. They were used to the inappropriate, gross Barney, whose main purpose was to pick up chicks and have sex with them. They were used to Barney being unfeeling and direct. They were used to Barney brushing off problems with his 'awesomeness'. They weren't used to dull Barney. He wasn't sleeping with any female that moved, he wasn't using his annoying catchphrases with every chance he had, he was punctual for work every single day, he wasn't touching a drop of scotch. It was unhealthy, when compared to what they had grown to know of Barney, but what made it abnormal was how normal it was. He was calmer, more assured, more sane, he paid more attention to what they said. But it wasn't Barney.
"We can't tell Robin. It's for Barney to tell her, and knowing him right now, it's going to take him forever, but it's not our puzzle to put together. They're Barney and Robin. They'll figure things out. Perhaps not in the best ways, but they'll get it right."
"Oh, Robin! How have you been, sweetie?" Lily hugged her friend tightly, noticing that Robin looked radiant, and those 4 weeks in Milan had done her a world of good - her eyebags were gone, and her dark circles had faded. They sat down in the booth, gushing over all the fashions through Robin's exploits and photographed memories, with Ted and Marshall next to them.
"Women, they'll always do this, won't they." Marshall smiled as Lily and Robin engaged in one of the weirdest debates he'd heard about feathers.
Ted glanced at Robin, half-worrying about Barney, but he nodded unconsciously and shrugged. "Yeah. They will."
He walks in the rain with a black golf umbrella he got from his workplace, handed to him by his secretary. He hadn't even noticed that it was pouring, he hadn't been noticing much at all. He'd fallen into a pattern, and it irked him. He wanted to go back to being awesome, to being ridiculous and outrageous and embarrassing and just everything that he was before, before thishappened. He almost walks past MacLaren's again, but he looks up in time, he wasn't even aware that he was looking down.
Robin's the first one he sees, how can he not. Her dark hair falling past her shoulders, that beautiful maroon coat that brings out her skin tone perfectly, and he realises, she's not wearing make-up this time either. She's beautiful, he's always known that. It's just that he hasn't realised that there's something about Robin, something he can't quite place, that makes him feel slightly insecure. In that moment, he forgets about Nora, he forgets how he's been for the past few weeks, and orders a scotch at the bar.
"Barney, hey!" He turns around to see her smiling at him, thatsmile, and it feels like it's been years since he last smiled back at anyone that way.
"Barney's been acting weird tonight." Ted nudges Lily under the table, using his pen to poke her in the knee, causing her to squeak. She shoots him a glare, followed by a knowing look that he can't quite read. "He's acting like he's in love with Robin again, that's what it is."
Both of them observe Robin and Barney intently, he's sitting at the head of the table, with Robin to his right, and they notice that his feet are angled towards her, he's paying attention to her every word, with the occasional chuckle.
"I'm glad you're better now." Robin clinks her scotch glass against his as she declares, with a small smile on her face. Lily can't quite read her smile, is it a relieved smile because it means he's over Nora, or is it a smile that one gives a friend because they're genuinely happy that they're feeling better? She exchanges a glance with Ted, but both of them are anticipating Barney's reaction, they hadn't touched that topic since Robin left, it'd been much too sensitive for any of them to attempt to approach.
"I'm glad I'm better too." His reply is limp, an echo, he regrets it as soon as he says it, Robin's smile fades away quickly as she finishes her glass of scotch. He doesn't know why, he doesn't know why he didn't try to sound more positive that he had broken up with Nora, he doesn't know why she looks preoccupied.
The evening grows darker, and eventually they go off, one by one. Marshall and Lily, then Robin because she's jet-lagged, and soon it's just him and Ted.
"I miss her, Ted." Barney mumbles, it's almost an afterthought, and it stops Ted in mid-drink. He doesn't know if Barney is referring to Nora or Robin, so he just keeps quiet, knowing Barney's had a lot to drink.
"I mean, I said her name in my sleep. When I was having sex. I've never done that, Ted, I'm normally way too awesome for that. I think I'm still in love with Robin, Ted. But she doesn't care. She's got her life, she was the one that told me to pursue Nora, she helped me ask Nora out for a date. She doesn't care, does she?"
Barney finishes the rest of the scotch in his glass, and raises it to signal for more, but Ted shakes his head at the bartender, knowing his friend has had far too much to drink.
"I ruined her date with Josh. I told her she was better than him, that she needs someone better, that she needs legendary. I want to be with Robin, Ted. But I'm not good enough for her, I'm just this stupid guy that sleeps with women and dates the co-worker of the woman he loves, the woman he's never stopped loving when they broke up. I can't be anyone's boyfriend, Ted, I'm just going to hurt everyone that I love."
"You're not, Barney." Ted tries to go on, but he's still struggling with the knowledge that Barney has been so hung up over Nora when now he's claiming that he's been in love with Robin this whole time. "Someday, you'll be good enough for the person you love. But you've got to show it to her, Barney, you've got to tell her that you're trying to be a better person, for her."
Barney sits on his couch, switching on the television. The lights get progressively brighter, just the way he's programmed it so that the brightness doesn't overwhelm him when he turns it on, especially in the dark. He doesn't bother turning on the lamps, he sits in the darkness, with a glass of plain water because he wants to be sober at that moment. He looks at the shows he's recorded, every single one of them is there only because Robin's the anchor and he never deleted those. They're his representation of his feelings for her.
He picks up his phone, he knows what he has to do.
She doesn't answer it, of course, it's 2 in the morning and she doesn't work this late anymore. In a way, he's glad she doesn't answer. It makes it just that little bit easier.
"Robin, hey. It's me, Barney. I know this seems sudden, I've just broke up with Nora, and we've been such a terrible pair in the past. But I miss you. I don't know why, but I get the feeling that whatever happened between us two years ago, it wasn't meant to just end like that. Just between you and me, I think you're the most awesome person in the world. Even more than the person in the mirror. I know I'm not good enough yet, I don't deserve to be given a chance, not right now. But I'm working towards that. I haven't been a good boyfriend in the past, not to you. What I was with Nora, that wasn't the Barney-being-a-boyfriend, it was me being stupid and not realising that the most awesome person in the world was pushing me towards someone else because she thought I'd be happier that way. Anyway, all I really want to say is that I hope you give me a chance to be good enough for you."
He hangs up, a small smile on his face, and he glances at the television set. Her face is serious, but there's this tenderness that he notices. He sits there, watching for another hour or so, the volume turned down low, but her voice is all that matters, not the words she's saying.
(A/N: The next chapter is very likely to be the last, I get the feeling that I'm writing them out of character and it's frustrating for me, so yeah. I hope you guys were satisfied with it, drop me a note or two? Thanks.)