Bella tried to rid her mind of Victoria's scent, fighting desperately to resist the toxic instincts she now felt surging through her body. That's what the old Bella would do; forgive and forget. Don't be a coward Bella, the vampire part of her screamed. The voice reverberated piercingly off the walls of her mind, urging her to fight back. Were even now, it's not worth it, the old Bella whispered. "Shut up," she shrieked, slamming her fists down onto the kitchen table furiously. The voices silenced themselves, slinking back into the crevices of her mind until next time. Her body trembled with pent up anger and she pushed her chair back from the table sharply, unwilling to admit her newfound thirst. The pit in her stomach seemed to grow by the minute, as she fought against the animal's hunger reflex. She didn't know how much longer she could keep this up. Eventually she was going to have to eat and she knew it was only a matter of time. The reasonable side of her mind began to plead with her.

Bella sighed in defeat and walked over to the refrigerator in search of something to eat. She spotted a pack of raw steaks in the meat drawer and took them out of the fridge reluctantly. Dropping them onto the kitchen counter carelessly, she stood back and stared at the flesh in front of her eyes. After a few moments, still contemplating what she was about to do, she lurched forward hastily, ripping the plastic from the Styrofoam plate. Her hands grabbed one of the steaks roughly and she tilted her head back, twisting the meat over her open mouth. Blood slowly trickled between her parted lips and she gagged, not ready for the taste. Everything she used to be told her to stop, but the monster inside of her needed her to keep going. Begrudgingly she forced herself to swallow the crimson liquid and she could feel the burning in the bottom of her throat beginning to subside. Bella closed her eyes in relief, happy that it was working. Once she had finally drained the steak of everything within it, she moved on to the next piece, repeating the same process until she had sucked each and every slice of meat dry. The burning of hunger within her finally subsided and she slumped down to the floor, exhausted from fighting it.

She lay down on top of the smooth, tile floor and stared up at the ceiling as reflections of Edward played through her head. Her mind drifted back to the times when she had so stubbornly fought with him to change her. She knew now how right he'd been, it was a nightmare and she felt like such a fool. The time drifted by slowly and she was unable to fall asleep, unable to pass the night away. She depended on blood to survive now and yes, she was beautiful. But beauty seemed such an insignificant thing now that she was doomed to spend eternity in loneliness. Her lifeless heart ached for his company and she longed for him to be there with her, passing the time away. Life for eternity seemed like a curse now that she had no one to share it with and she suddenly resented herself for having been so naïve. Edward would be ashamed of what she had become, even now, as a vampire, she felt as if she did not belong. She ran her fingers along the kitchen floor once more and rose to her feet stealthily, a sudden need for a shower overtaking her.

She turned the knob of the shower all the way over and watched with gratification as steam began to roll off of the burning hot water. Her hands worked over her clothing efficiently, peeling off her bloody, ripped t-shirt and dirt stained jeans. She climbed into the bathtub, grateful to finally relax and sat under the stream of water, hugging her knee's to her chest. Her eye's closed in response, feeling the tension lift up off of her body slowly. The water turned brown as it ran down the drain, carrying the filth from her body along with it. She curled her body up even tighter and leaned against the side of the shower wall for support. She hadn't even noticed when the water finally ran cold, her body matched the icy temperature of the water and she had to force herself just to leave from the comfortable position. Nothing seemed real anymore as she stood from her place inside of the bathtub, numb to all emotion. With one hand she wiped a streak of vapor away from the bathroom mirror, ready to face what she had become. Her eyes widened in shock at the colorless white of her body, her human shade of skin having been dark in comparison to how she looked now. She remembered the terrible burgundy Edward's eye's had turned when he was hungry and imagined her eyes must have looked very much the same only earlier today, but she found herself admiring the familiar golden coloring that tinted them now, a color she had grown very partial to. Her lips stood out considerably against her fair skin, a deep shade of red. To her own astonishment, her hair had grown to the middle of her back, wild with big, loose curls. When she looked into the mirror, she didn't see her face anymore, she didn't see Bella. The monster she had become was beautiful and strange.

Bella finally tore her eyes away from her strange reflection, forcing herself out of her trance and walked across the hallway to her bedroom. She quickly got dressed and finished packing the rest of her things, unable to stay in the house any longer. Her feelings of attachment began to grow stronger and she felt that if she didn't leave now, she would never be able to. Things were different, and she had to get away. She dug around in her nightstand drawer anxiously, searching for the money she had hidden away for a rainy day. Once she'd found the roll of bills, she placed it in her duffle bag on top of her clothing and zipped it shut, finally ready to leave. She strode across the living room floor gracefully and thrust the front door open, glancing behind her shoulder reluctantly, taking one last look at the place she'd grown to know as her home.

--

I DON'T own Twilight...

So, it took me awhile to finish the last of this chapter, I wasn't really sure how I should end it. But I think I made the right decision. Hopefully the next chapter will be more action filled. I am going to write the next chapter from the same place as I left off in the introduction...if you're confused...go back and read the introduction again. Basically I am hopping six months forward.

REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW!

Also, recommend my story to anyone and everyone, the more the merrier -!

You know you love me,

AlexandraP