Goodbye Happiness

SIX
Roxas

The bed was soft and soothing as soon as my back made impact with it. Every part of me relaxes in the comfort of my bed. Obviously, I knew this wouldn't last long but it was best to not dwell on it.

My eyes drifted close.

All I wanted to do was wake up to tomorrow.

My double life was exhausting. Every day it was draining every ounce of energy I had left. Instead of feeling like a teenage boy, I felt like someone who was too old to do anything too active. This was not how I should be feeling whatsoever.

My thoughts drifted to tomorrow.

Would I meet her again? Would she be in the library again? What would I say when I see her in the ice cream shop?

And really? C'mon, she works at the ice cream shop. She can try sea salt ice cream any time she wanted. What a lame excuse.

What about Xion? I walked home every day from school with her every day. Heck, we were quite an inseparable pair if I wasn't with Axel. There was absolutely no way she'd be cool going home alone. And after the way she acted today at the ice cream shop, there was no way I'm letting her meet Namine again.

Namine…

A blush crept onto my face so fast thinking of the pale, blonde girl. The bottom of my gut drops thinking of the cheesy line I had said before making my exit.

Like really Roxas? Sea salt ice cream was the best I could come up with?

I could have just said I'd be back for more ice cream.

And who has never eaten sea salt ice cream? That is one of God's many greatest creations ever!

My eyes open when I realize my thoughts were too scattered. I turn to my side and face the wall. If I don't get any sleep in now, I was going to be absolutely exhausted tonight. And if I were to go to school tomorrow, I was going to be miserable with no rest.

Suddenly, I hear a knock at my door. I made no attempt to go and open it.

"Roxas," a muffled voice calls my name.

It was Xion. My body willed itself to sit up in bed. I was in no mood to deal with her right now. Especially if I was going to have to deal with her tomorrow.

The door opens and she shyly peeks her head in.

"Can I come in?"

My eyes roll, simply because she was going to come in regardless of my answer.

"Yeah, sure," I drop back onto the bed and stare at the ceiling. I hear the door click shut as her footsteps draws nearer. The foot of my bed droops as she sits down. My attention still remains on the plain ceiling.

A moment of silence passes before she finally clears her throat.

"R-Roxas," she calls my name. I push myself up and slouch against the headboard.

"How do you know that girl?" she asks. Instead of looking at me, she had her gaze set on the gray cement floors.

"Why does it matter how I know her?" I question back.

Her brows furrowed and immediately she gets up from the bed.

"Roxas, I'm serious. You have never made a friend once since we've started school," she frowns.

I didn't retort back. What she was saying was true. The only friends I actually had was Xion and the organization. But maybe that was because I wasn't allowed out unless with supervision. And as I grew older, I understood that I wasn't allowed to meet new people. It was too risky.

"I'd suggest you stay away from her, Roxas. For not only her sake, but for yours too."

I sit up and stare at her. She was staring at the wall ahead.

Immediately, I felt annoyed, "Xion, I just met the girl today. We are in no way friends."

Xion's mouth turns thin as she purses her lips together. She crosses her arms, a move she only did when she was about to get snippy.

"Roxas, the girl has been working there for forever. If it's not the blond boy, it's the blonde girl that serves us the ice cream. What makes you notice her now?"

I kind of had a feeling of what she was trying to imply. But no way was I about to admit anything.

"We had met in the library, okay? She had available seats at her table and she let me sit. Xion, you're getting paranoid for no reason," I explain, but yet I couldn't exactly get myself to believe my own words either.

She makes her way over to my desk and looks over at the books and papers. A tack board was in place above the desk on the way. She immediately untack a picture from it.

"That girl will never accept this life that you live. But Roxas," she turns and holds out the picture for me to see and says, "I will always accept it. I understand it. You and I have been inseparable since the day we've met."

I stare at the picture in her hand. It was the two of us. We were probably ten years old. Cheesy and naïve.

It was no question that Xion had felt something more than a sibling's bond. It became more apparent when we had become teenagers.

Maybe it was the fact that the older members would always tease about us getting married one day or something. But I never took it to heart. Xion on the other hand probably did.

Doesn't help when your kid-self promised to never leave.

To me, it was just easier to play dumb than to reject someone that was so important.

"Xion, I'm tired. I need to take a nap before tonight's mission," a flicker of hurt in her eyes is all it takes for me to feel guilt.

"Fine," she mutters. She tosses the picture on the desk and stomps her way out of the room.

Once the door slams shut, I immediately drop myself back onto the bed.

It would be easier to just go and be with Xion. She knows everything about me. We were the closest out of everyone. And she knows my life. She lives the same life too. We would have no secrets. It would be so simple and easy if I could just feel the same for Xion.

It just didn't help that I already knew I didn't.

XxXxX

A/N: So even though I had wanted to update after Memorial Day, I just got really busy with work. And being busy with work, you tend to get lazy and just wanna rest on your days off. Sorry if my laziness got in the day. But yesterday was my birthday so why not give you readers a gift? So you can kind of see the relationship between Roxas and Xion. I won't say if Xion starts antagonizing Namine or not. I mean Namine does already have enough on her plate as it is. But I promise that you will get to see more of how Namine lives in the next chapter and the next Roxas chapter, Axel and some others will make their appearances! But until next time, peace out!