Summary: After Jean's death a very sullen Logan needs comfort and a now human Marie is more then willing to give it to him. Of course the next morning Logan runs away, only to return five years later to a still young looking Marie and a very familiar five year old raven haired boy.

Disclaimer: I do not own The X-men. The only person in here I own is gonna be the kid. xD

Pairing: Rogan

Warning: M, Don't know what for yet but it's me so yeah to be safe it's rated M. xD

This Is How I Disappear

Chapter Five: Under Pressure

Frowning Victor lifted his head before sniffing the air. Mimicking him James did the same sniffing the air while sitting in his uncle's lap, "What is it Uncle?" he asked curiously looking up at his uncle with his big hazel eyes. Growling silently Victor shook his head.

Coward.

"It's nothing Jimmy just a coward running away."

"Oh…. Who?"

"No one important."

James nodded looking back down at his uncle giant paw like hand, his claws sitting dangerously on the younger boy's leg. Yet James felt completely safe. Being a child he was completely oblivious to the things his uncle had done and of what a bad man he is. To him he was his uncle. His wonderful, nice uncle. "Do you think I'll have claws like you?"

"Maybe."

"I want something new… like… um… Well I dunno…"

Victor smirked running a clawed hand through the kid's hair, "Really now? Why do you want claws anyway? It ain't that great."

"Yeah-huh you have fun."

"True." For the most part.

The door opened and James looked up but Victor didn't, having smelled Rogue coming before she got up on the floor. Finally looking up his amber eyes met her hazel ones and he nodded, "He's gone I believe… ran off like he always does when things get hard." Biting her lip she nodded staying silent. Cocking his head to the side Victor raised an eyebrow. "Thought you'd be happy considering your hate for him coming back was evident…"

"I am happy." She whispered softly.

"Don't seem like it. Come on I can smell lies… damn."

"Oh! Uncle said a bad word! Bad word! Bad word!" James tattled lifting his hand in the air. Smirking Victor growled clapping one hand over the boy's mouth his words becoming muffled before Victor tickled him. It was an odd sight to Rogue and no doubt Victor would never do it public he had only recently been doing it in front of her. Laughing James squirmed from his grasp falling on the floor. "Uncle!"

"That'll teach you for tattle tailing." Victor mused a smirk on his face. James stuck out his tongue before jetting from the room waving at Rogue before bounding down the hall. "Now…" Turning his attention back to Rogue Victor leaned back against the wall resting his arms behind his head.

"You gonna tell me how ya' feel? I ain't that in tune with my emotions girl so you should really take what I'm offerin'."

"Which is?"

"Help? I'm the only piece of shit here who knows enough about Big James besides you so spill it. You don't want him to go."

"I do."

"No ya' don't."

"Yes I do."

"No ya' don't."

Glaring up at him Rogue frowned, "How do you know huh? You might know Logan but you don't know me. Its better he's not here. He's unreliable-"

"And I'm a psychotic murder yet you let me around the kid."

"That's different…"

"Not really. You'd rather have the psychotic uncle around your son then the unreliable father? You're either the worst mom on the planet or seriously fucked up." Victor paused as if he was collecting his thoughts, "So? Which is it?"

Rogue sighed sitting down on her sons bed brushing a hand through her hair. She didn't want Logan around. Really, she didn't. Right? Shaking her head she groaned wanting to pound a wall in frustration. This was stupid if Logan came back there would just be more drama and she was happy without him here. Not to mention there were a few other things that he didn't know…

"I'm seriously fucked up."

"Join the club babe. My whole family is fucked up. But hey family is family." She eyed him and he shrugged, pushing himself from the bed as he popped his neck and knuckles. "James is the father of your child and the kid needs a dad trust me. An uncle isn't enough mostly an uncle like me. "He smirked then reaching over to the edge of James' bed where his tags hung. Tilting his head to the side he held them for a moment.

"A man's war tags are sometimes the most precious thing he can have. Probably 'cause we're men but something about them is special we don't give them up lightly. Mostly Jimmy, his were the only link to his past…" Holding his own tags still Victor ran his thumb over his name absently, "And he gave them to you right? I know you still have them. If he gave you his tags you mean something to him, trust me."

"He gave them too long before he left Victor…"

"But he didn't take them when he left."

"He forgot."

"Did you not just listen to anything I just said? He wouldn't forget you idiot."

"So what you think I should run after him?"

"You can't just expect him to come back all the time Rogue. For once chase after him. You can chase after him and not seem desperate."

She knew that but it was just the fact of the matter….

He would chase after you.

Sighing Rogue nodded to herself. He would, hell he had when she had run away after he stabbed her. But this was different… No it wasn't. Biting her lip Rogue stood looking at Victor hesitantly, "Will you look after James until I get back?"

Putting the tags back Victor nodded, "But hurry you know I hate this place." Having the urge to hug him or something Rogue left deciding against it. He wasn't close enough for that… Leaving the room she went to her own, grabbing her jacket and boots before heading to her car. She had no idea where Logan went but she knew he was probably at a bar.

Or at least she hoped.

--

Logan knew it was her the moment her smell entered his nose. There was no way he could smell her sweet smell and think of someone else. Mostly not now. Downing the beer Logan asked for another not bothering to look at her as she walked over to him. The waiter handed him his beer and Marie caught him before he left.

"Another beer please."

The man looked her over before raising an eyebrow, "ID?" Sighing but not surprised Marie reached into her pocket to pull out her wallet, showing him her ID. The man read her birthday before nodding handing it back to her. Then Rogue took a seat waiting for her beer. She didn't speak and Logan didn't care. He didn't want her to speak. The waiter came back with her beer and another for Logan since his was almost empty.

Wolverine really hated that he couldn't get drunk easily sometimes you needed to get drunk. Like right now. He glanced at her, watching her down the beer like a pro. Logan would have smirked if he wasn't angry and depressed. He wondered as well if it was him in her head that made her drink like that or just her.

"Logan… I wanna tell you a story."

"Is it about a moon, a trickster, and CucuKachoo? Because I've heard it before…" he grumbled taking another swig. He still remembered that story to this day and god… he hated it so much.

"No it's not. It's about Ying and Yang and Yicha. Ying and Yang were two brothers instead of brother and sister like people believe. Ying was the good brother, hard working, strong, moral. Yang was the bad brother, lazy, weak, and evil. Because they were all they had they protected each other and took care of each other. But Yang was secretly jealous of Ying and hated him for his strength and beauty. But Ying was not the man he was believed to be. In truth he was a coward, a sheep in man's clothing. Whenever things got tough he would turn to Yang.

One day Ying did a terrible thing, he slept with the Emperor's daughter, Yicha. Being of poor decent and of low life Ying knew that he could not shame the princess, so he left. He left China then knowing that if he was not in the Emperor's land he could not be killed. Months after running away Yang found him and reported that the Emperor's daughter was with child and she was to be banished for her father suspected her of harlotry. Ying knew the right thing was to go back but he could not.

Ying kept running and never saw his princess again or his child. Instead Yang stayed behind and rightfully took care of them both. Years later Ying died by a disease, lonely and sad. That night when he expelled his last breath Yicha did the same, dying with her child in her arms."

Logan frowned looking into his beer. How was it all the women in his life found perfect mythical stories to match everything he did wrong? "What's the point of that story, Marie? That I'm going to die unless I go back."

Rogue sighed shaking her head, taking another beer. "No Logan, a disease couldn't take your life…." She knew he wouldn't understand.

"Then just spit it out in English alright? I'm tired of this mythical shit. Kayla did the same and I assumed she was the damned moon but she was the trickster and I'd rather not be tricked again."

"I'm not tricking you Logan. My point… is if you leave you might not regret it but… I… James needs a father Logan."

"He has Victor."

"Victor isn't a father he's an uncle. Believe it or not there is a difference between the two. Even Victor agreed that-"

"My father was an asshole, my real one anyway."

"So? My dad was an obsessive Christian while my mother was a passive aggressive woman who let him walk all over her. Look at me I'm nothing like my mom." That was for fucking sure. "You wouldn't be a bad dad…"

"You said you didn't want me back…" Logan grumbled finishing off another beer before getting the waiter's attention for another.

"I… lied…" Raising an eyebrow Logan looked at her without turning his head to see her carefully looking at her beer, "I didn't want to be hurt again… or James. I was afraid you come into his life, make him love you and just… leave…"

Like he did with her.

He didn't answer but instead just went back to drinking. Giving up Rogue stood handing the waiter the money for her beers. Fine she wasn't going to beg him. If that was what he wanted he was going to be disappointed. She didn't beg.

She was heading to the door when he spoke, "Kitty said you still don't regret that night…"

"I don't."

"Why not?"

"Because at the time you were the most important man to me, I loved you… and- and you need comforting. I was willing to give it. I knew that we wouldn't be together in the morning. I didn't think about you leavin' but I wasn't surprised. And in the end I got James from it and I love him more then anyone. How could I regret that?" She saw something flash across his face but he didn't move or speak. Shrugging Rogue headed outside, unlocking her car before getting in and driving back to the school.

At least she tried.

--

Logan growled leaning his head against the steering wheel of his truck. He needed to go back; even Wolverine wanted him to go back but… What if something bad happened? What if James hated him? And Victor he couldn't stand the son of a bitch… But he had been there for Rogue and James when he couldn't.

Cursing all the cusswords in the English dictionary Logan flipped into reverse, backing up before making a U-turn heading back to the mansion. He lit a cigar as he drove, smoking it fast to calm his nerves. It was dark now so no doubt Marie would be asleep when he got there. It was just as well.

Pulling into the driveway Logan parked the car before getting out, slinging his bag over his shoulder as he stalked back inside. The whole place was quiet which meant everyone had gone to sleep. And that was fine with him. He didn't want to talk to anyone. Going to his room Logan paused at James' door leaning against it for a moment. Sighing he cracked open the door, the sight making him gape in disbelief.

James laid there like an innocent child, curled into his bastard of a brother. What the hell? How could he just sleep with him like that- Victor could kill him and- Logan shook his head, clearing his throat quietly, looking back at the pair. Victor's arm was protectively placed over the boy, his claws hanging off the edge of the bed, far away from James' body.

"Perv, watching your son sleep." Logan's eyes snapped up to Victor's face and the man smirked bemused. Logan hadn't realized the animal was awake. "I assume you're back then? I guess there is a first time for everything."

Logan rolled his eyes, "I could say the same thing." He muttered. Victor frowned and looked down at his nephew lifting his clawed hand to run through the kid's hair.

"Wanna know what I was just thinking before you walked in?"

"No."

"I was thinking about how easy it would be to kill him, to break his neck without even trying. I could do it right now…" Victor mused his hand stopping to rest on the boy's neck. Still James didn't wake up and instead stayed sleeping trustingly in the monster's arms. Logan tensed however. "Course I always think that with anyone… You probably do too. Hell anyone probably does its natural. There's always a difference on thinking something and acting it out." His claws tickled the kid's neck and James murmured in his sleep curling farther into Victor.

"Which you do a lot, act on your thoughts." Logan muttered his hands clenched. He was being good and not wrenching his son from the man's arms even though he wanted to with every fiber of his being.

"Can't help it, you know I suck at control…" The man smirked then grinning at his brother, his canines showing. "But what amazes me is that he trusts me. It's a kid thing; trust. They seem to want to see the good in everyone…" there was a pause, "Like what Rogue did with you when ya'll first met. And older wiser girl would never have got into the back of your truck."

Logan absently wondered how he knew that but shrugged it off. He was right though. "Hah, she even trusts me for the most part which is the dumbest thing someone could do."

"Your point?"

"My point is James…" Victor locked eyes with his brother before smirking, "Hurt Rogue or James and I'll cut off your head brother, I guarantee it."

"Why do you care?"

"Family is family."

Looking at his brother once more Logan left the room, closing the door behind him. Family is Family. Funny how Victor was the animal, the monster, the son of a bitch and yet he was more of Ying then Yang right now.

Shaking the thought away Logan went to his room setting down his bag. Pulling off his shirt and jeans Logan went to his bed, sitting on the edge to think. Growling he pulled his jeans back on. He really had problems. Leaving his room he headed to Rogue's almost unknowingly. Instead of going in however he leaned against her door for a moment listening to her breathing soundly, obviously sleep.

Opening the door he walked in quietly walking to the edge of the bed where she slept so beautifully. He had almost forgotten in those five years how beautiful she was. Ha, that was a lie. He could never forget how beautiful Marie was. When he had seen her naked for the first time… It had awakened something in him that he didn't know he had…. And then he had left.

Sighing Logan reached down to brush a hand through her soft hair. Mumbling Rogue turned over, clutching the covers to her. Logan knew then that he was back to stay, he had to stay. He couldn't leave Marie again… Because he loved her and that sucked. She didn't love him anymore and she probably never would again yet… he had realized too late he had loved her and over those five years had fought to convince himself he didn't. But he did and he still does.

"Goodnight Marie…"

Leaving her room, he shut the door quietly heading back to his room where he took his jeans back off. Climbing into bed Logan didn't sleep much that night, instead he just stared up at the ceiling.

--

Hey Chapter Five Done~
I've been working on the story non stop. Lol. I just really like it. 3 I'm happy ya'll do too. A twist is coming up~ AGAIN~ Lol. THANKS FOR THE REVIEWS~
I love you guys so damn much 3 You keep me sane. Lol. R&R Please~