A/N: Lord of the Rings is not owned by me nor will ever be owned by me (unless I win the lottery but that's besides the point).

Haldir: Are you not going to tell your readers why you have not updated in such a long time?

Me: No. Why would I do that?

Haldir: Because I know for a fact that you were being lazy and could not be asked to do anything.

Me: I resent that comment!

Haldir: You resemble that comment.

Me: Do not. I have had revision and ... other things to do?

Haldir: You are not fooling anyone.

Me: Shut up. I cannot wait to get rid of you after this chapter.

Haldir: The feeling is mutual.

Me: Sighs. On with the story.

Chapter 6: Meeting the best eyebrows in Middle Earth (and the elf that they are attached to).

If there was one thing that I had learnt during my short stay in Lothlorien, it was that elves were very efficient. Even more so than the Germans (but we won't go into that, please don't hate me). Within two short hours my meagre belongings were packed and I was standing in the outskirts of Caras Galadhon with Lady Galadriel, waiting for Haldir to show up.

Getting bored, I tried to engage the Lady into some small talk.

"Sooo. How long will it take to get to Rivendell?"

"On horseback, it should take around a week and a half."

"Oh, cool."

"Really? I thought it was quite mild today."

"What? Oh right ... I don't mean the temp ... Never mind. Just ignore me."

Galadriel just smiled and we lapsed into a comfortable silence. Only to be broken by the arrival of Haldir leading a chestnut coloured stallion through the trees.

"I thought elves rode without tack?"

"We do, but I believe most mortals do not. So I took the liberty of having Arandur tacked up. Is that a problem?"

"No. Its just, there are two of us. And only one horse."

"There is no reason why we cannot ride together."

"But ... I don't ... want to. You annoy me, greatly. If we have to spend two weeks within very close proximity to each other, I will not be responsible for any harm inflicted upon you. We will kill each other. A lot. Constantly."

"Well unless you are able to handle an elven steed, then we will have to make do. And I am guessing that you cannot"

I let out and exasperated sigh and said "All right, but on your head be it."

I turned to the Lady of the Wood.

"Well, enjoy the peace and quiet when I'm gone. You won't have much time to get used to it, because I will be back very soon. With some friends, so don't try and shoot us."

"You have great knowledge of the future, I will heed your words and wait for your arrival. But until then, take this gift, and let it help you until we meet again."

I was handed a thick leather belt and a sheathed sword. Wordlessly I drew the blade from its sheath and swung it around a bit. It was the right length, relatively light and well balanced. And as with everything made by elves, it was rather beautiful.

"I trust that you will use it well."

"You are trusting me with a highly valuable object of death? Ha ha! Maybe you need to lie down for a bit."

"I have every confidence in you."

"That only makes one of us" I mumbled with a grin. Sheathing the sword and fastening the belt around me, I then turned to the horse, put one hand on the pommel of the saddle, my left foot in the stirrup and hoisted myself onto the horse. Looking down I met the confused eyes of Haldir and said "No need to get another horse, most of that was pure luck and stuff that I've seen on TV."

"You might need to move back a little, I need to get on in front of you."

I grumbled, but obliged. With one final farewell, we left Lothlorien and sped through the forest.

Now, such is the rate of a galloping horse, one has to grab on pretty tightly to whatever they can to stop themselves from falling off. My problem was that the closest thing to cling onto was a particularly annoying elf. Now don't get me wrong, in any other situation I would have been glad, no, overjoyed at the prospect of having a good reason to be that close to a good looking elf. But I had other things on my mind. Mainly my impending doom of having to cross the width of Middle Earth on a quest where lots of people will die. That was another thing that was bugging me. I knew the fate of those I was about to meet. I started listing all the people that I knew were going to die. I stopped about halfway because it was a bit too depressing.

So instead I did what I usually do to calm down, I started humming or even singing dome sort of song to put my mind off things. I was in a Beatles mood that day and subjected Haldir to a rather loud rendition of "I am the walrus". He wasn't best pleased.

"I am the eggman, they are the eggmen, I am the walrus, goo goo ga joob!"

"Chloe! Will you please refrain from singing! It is getting rather tiresome."

"Why is it that you elves always sound so polite when you're pissed off?"

He muttered something in Silvan under his breath, probably something along the lines of "God give me the strength not to throttle her."

He fell silent and I grinned. And started singing again. "Mr city policemen, sitting pretty little policemen in a row."

We carried on riding non stop 'till sun down before we set up camp. I had never ridden a horse before and needless to say was definitely the worse for wear after a whole day of non-stop riding. I looked like the hunch crotch of Notre Dame. I was unable to stand up straight. Haldir found it rather amusing, I did not.

"Just shut up Haldir!"

"I said nothing."

"You were thinking." Haldir raised up his hands in surrender but continued to look amused, that is until I picked up a load of grass and lobbed it at him. That wiped the smile off his face. He quickly set about collecting firewood and it wasn't long before he had a good fire going.

I couldn't help but giggle slightly and start thinking of camp fire songs.

"Ging gang goolygoolygoolygooly wotcher ging gang goo, ging gang goo." I muttered under my breath with a grin. But, stupid elves with their stupid hearing, Haldir heard me and gave a questioning look. I quickly stopped singing and asked very loudly where the food was.

After a small supper of bread and fruit, I decided to get some sleep. I fell into the depths of slumber looking up at the trees of Lothlorien and the starlight twinkling through the canopy of leaves above me.

We rose with the sun that morning. By midday we had left Lothlorien behind us and were speeding toward the Misty Mountains. It would take us three days to get to the foot of the mountains. The aim was to get over them before the snows of the winter set in. The highest peaks were already glistening white, it was going to get very cold.

It did get cold. Really cold.

"Haldir" I said as I wrapped my cloak around me and was huddled against the elf for warmth. "How long is it going to be before we get to where it's warmer?"

"We should be over the mountain pass by the end of the day. Luckily it has not been subjected to snow so it should be quite easy going. I know a good place to set up camp tonight. About a quarter of the way down the mountain."

"Good, because I can't feel the end of my nose. Its too damned cold."

"Well you have a slightly larger than average nose, so that is unsurprising."

I made a guttural growl in the back of my throat but said nothing. It was too cold to argue.

Haldir was right and we did make it over the pass with about an hour and a half of daylight left. The going was a bit slower because of the steep incline that the horse had to go down, but we made it to the cave that we were to sleep in. Well, I say cave, it was more of a hollow bit under a ledge of rock. But I wasn't bothered. I was too cold.

I woke up the next morning in a very compromising situation. In my sleep I had huddled up to Haldir, with my head resting on his chest and arms wrapped around his neck. The worse thing was, he was awake.

"Oh bugger." I sat up quickly, forgetting that I was lying under a rock ledge. And I hit my head."Ow! Shit! Next time, I choose where we sleep Haldir! Alright?"

He just laughed at me and started packing his bedroll away.

It took us 2 days to get back on level ground and a further 3 before we got to Rivendell.

I knew that we were getting close because we kept on getting stopped by guards suddenly appearing from the surrounding undergrowth. They were more interested in Haldir than me, but I got a few odd glances.

Rivendell finally came into view. The Last Homely House almost shone in the midday sun. Beautiful buildings of stone left me in awe. It was as though they were one with the nature that surrounded them. But I could see that whatever power had made it was beginning to fade, vines were taking over the outside of the structures and the masonry was starting to crumble. I knew that one day, nothing would be left of Rivendell and its inhabitants. That made me depressed, so I started humming "We are the champions" by Queen.

We slowed to a halt and I was interrupted from my humming. Haldir leaped off the horse and turned round to help me. I just gave him the two fingered salute and found my own way down, albeit an ungraceful one.

Waiting for us in the courtyard of Rivendell was Lord Eyebrows himself, Elrond. He greeted Haldir warmly and then turned to me.

"Mae govannen Chloe. Welcome to the Last Homely House." He greeted me with such great sincerity that I couldn't help but look at the floor and mumble something along the lines of "nice to see you too Lord Eyebrows."

He seemed to sense my unease and quickly summoned an elf to show me to my room. It was not dissimilar to where I slept back in Lothlorien, so I quickly emptied the contents of my pack into the chest of drawers and set about removing the layers of grime from my face.

Once I had made myself slightly presentable, I stepped outside my room and decided to have a little look around.

A/N: (Ducks behind desk to avoid rotten food being thrown.) I am so sorry for not updating in many months! I have created a system so that I can get through the two fics that I have going at the same time. I will update again next weekend.