Disclaimer: I own nothing but Dwin and her family, even that is questionable at times. X3
Note: I'm going to be moving my posting schedule to Saturday (even as this was posted Sunday, I'm sorry, I really am.), as with school starting up it'll be easier for me to deal with. And I just want to say thank you for the support of this fic! It really means a lot! Also, if you see any errors, please tell me so I can fix them! ~Kassi
Chapter 6: Of Heartsongs and Togetherness.
As Dwin was walking back to her tent in the evening, she spotted a small figure leaving the King's tent. With a glare she followed her target at a distance, ducking behind a bush when he looked back at her, as if he sensed her anger at this distance. She blended in with the crowd of dwarves as her target got something to eat. She sat down on a rock by a random fire, ignoring the other dwarves, and waiting until he was done eating. He did need to keep up his strength and she wasn't going to get in the way of that. Though he glanced her way several times, as if he knew someone was watching. She had always turned away, making sure he didn't see her. She had just decided that it was safe to turn back but when she did his spot was empty. With wide eyes she stumbled away from the fire, she had tripped on a log, intent on finding her prey. Finally her eyes caught the figure moving quickly towards the tent. With narrowed eyes she stalked towards him. After they were a fair distance from the last campfire she made her move.
"Bilbo Baggins, I think you and I need to chat." The hobbit squeaked and turned wide-eyed. He tense and looked as if he was about to run, Dwin almost wished he had, but he seemed to have thought better of it.
"D-Dwin. Lovely to see you." Bilbo said, a slight tremor in his voice.
"It was funny. Aye, I worked my arse off, and I worried about Mazrlafm and Dain. But I also was grateful because I didn't need to worry about ya as well. But then come to find out, you were fighting. Not only were ya fighting but ya took on the Pale Orc. Then I heard rumours that no one was able to find ya. I was led to believe for a few horrible moments, that you were dead. Dead, Bilbo. And that conversation we had before lead me to believe that I had a part in your decision. That I had lead ya to your death. Do ya really care so little of yerself and my friendship to even tell me that yer okay?" Dwin took a breath, laying on all of the guilt she could. Her accent a little stronger because of her anger. And Bilbo did looked ashamed. As he should for worrying her so. Bilbo shuffled his feet against the ground, not looking up at her.
"I'm terribly sorry for worrying you, but Thorin... Thorin needed me. I couldn't let him down." Dwin looked at him confused for a second, but then it all fell into place. Why Bilbo hadn't just been abandoned by his friends, he had be abandoned by his One. That's why he had been so withdrawn and why he had to fight. Though Dwin couldn't understand because she didn't know her One, she could better see why he felt he needed to go. When she found her One, she'd moved the mountains for them. This did pacify her a bit, not that she'd let Bilbo know.
"He's your heartsong." Dwin stated finally. Bilbo looked up his eyes furrowed in confusion, "Do hobbit's not have heartsongs?"
"Heart-heartsongs? No, what are they?" Bilbo asked plainly confused. Dwin sighed, she promised herself she wouldn't tell Bilbo things she shouldn't, but this needed to be said. She looked around, making sure no was about before settling on a fallen tree. She could get in trouble for talking about this with an outsider, but she was ready to take that risk for him. And if he was the King's heartsong... well he needed to know. Bilbo took up residence besides her and she thought about how to explain one of the most fundamental things about dwarves.
"There's an old legend that when Mahal created dwarves he created them in pairs. So every dwarf has his One, the dwarf they are supposed to be with. And when a dwarf turns of age, they will have a dream. In that dream will the be sound of your One's voice singing a song. Your heartsong." Dwin had a soft smile on her face as she looked at Bilbo, "The King, he's your heartsong, your One. It's a wonderful gift to find them."
Bilbo nodded his understanding but turned his questioning eyes to her.
"What does it feel like, to find your heartsong?" Bilbo asked hesitantly. Dwin laughed, and with a snort she answered.
"I'm not the one to be asking. I haven't found mine yet." Dwin shrugged, unconcerned, one day she would find him. Dwin could recognize his voice anywhere, it was a lower baritone with a cheerful resonance, it as sturdy and sound as stone. She got excited just thinking about it. She couldn't wait to meet him. She was so involved with thinking about her One's voice she also missed Bilbo's next question.
"Is it common for your heart song to be of a different race?" Bilbo asked quietly. Dwin blinked at him, it taking a moment to understand what he asked.
"It's not common, no," She started carefully, she had to be delicate with this, "But it's not looked down upon. You don't choose who you love. Mahal does that, and he has a plan, whether you realise it or not. Plus, I don't think anyone who dare say no to the King Under the Mountain." Dwin smirked at him and bumped his shoulder. The smirk grew even wider when the hobbit blushed.
"How do you know it's your heartsong?" Dwin laughed at his next question, he was an inquisitive one, her friend. Of course, she shouldn't be surprised. Once Bilbo had first opened up to her he had many questions for her, but she had many of her own.
"Again, I'm not quite sure. But my Mama tells me that you feel drawn to the person. But it doesn't really... click... until you hear them sing. Aye, she told me she nearly fainted when she heard Da sing for the first time." Dwin giggled at the thought of her strong Mama fainting and she heard Bilbo's quiet chuckles next to her. They settled in a pleasant silence, Bilbo and her Mama where some of the only people Dwin could be silent with. Sometimes it was nice to just, not talk. She looked up at the stars and covered a yawn with her hand. Bilbo looked at her, an amused smile on his face.
"Tired?"
"You have no idea. I'm exhausted. I had to chase down on of patients to check his cracked rib, check a shattered arm, and take care of Princeling." Dwin grumbled, muttering the last part softly so Bilbo wouldn't hear, pouting at the memories. The grumpy dwarf, Dwalin had taken to actively avoiding her. She had only been able to corner him with a help of a sweet looking dwarf in knit. Was the two of them had cornered the dwarf, she checked his rib. Then she had to deal with the soldier with the shattered arm. It didn't look to be improving, and if it didn't show any signs soon, Dwin would have to amputate it. Then she went the back princeling's tent to drip soup and tea into his mouth. He could swallow the small amounts on his own now, which was a good sign. His breath was still a bit shaky though, so she had gotten an extra blanket to put on him. Bilbo's chuckle brought her out of her thoughts.
"Princeling? Is that what you call Kíli?" He asked still laughing. Dwin blushed, she hadn't realise he'd heard that.
"Yes. I'm taking care of Prince Kíli, it seemed right at the time." Dwin shrugged still blushing. She thought it fit.
"My, I might start calling him that." Bilbo gave her another amused look before his face got more serious, "How is he doing? I heard some news from Balin but since you're his healer..."
"He's doing better." Dwin said with a nod, "There's no sign of internal bleeding but he wasn't awakened yet."
Bilbo looked a little concerned but thanked her for the information. Finally he stood up and offered a hand for her to get up as well. She took it and got up from the log with another yawn. She tripped moving forward but caught herself before she fell completely, laughing a little at her stumble.
"It appears I'm in need of sleep. Good night Bilbo." She smiled at the hobbit.
"I need some rest as well, sleep well Dwin." He waved to her before heading off in the direction of the King's tent. Dwin looked at his retreating back with amusement. He even slept near is One, it was adorable. With a sigh, Dwin headed off to her own tent, asleep before her head touched the pillow. She dreamt of war again but was soothed by the gentle sounds of her heartsong, lifting her off to an easier sleep.
The next day started better than yesterday, having actually felt like she had gotten some sleep. Dwin went to check the soldier with the shattered arm and it was showing signs of healing. He may never get back full use of it but she didn't have to amputate. With a smile she walked to get something to drink, then went back to her tent. She only gotten halfway done with her drink when someone came into the tent. She looked up to see Surir standing in the entrance. Her teacher moved to sit down besides her. Dwin smiled but was little confused, Surir looked a little more serious than usual.
"How ya feeling lass?" Surir finally asked. Dwin was still confused but answered promptly.
"I"m fine?" It came out more of an question than an answer. Surir wasn't one for small talk, but Dwin didn't understand the reasoning behind this.
"Are ya asking me or telling me?" Surir said with an eyebrow arched. Dwin shrugged. She waited for her teacher to say something else, and with a sigh she complied, "How are ya dealing with aftermath of war?"
"It hasn't been bad." Dwin was telling the truth. Sure she'd had a few nightmares, it was nothing to really worry about though, not really. Dwin had been pretty busy, and she hadn't had time to think about much of anything thing. Now that things were slowing down, the nightmares were getting a little worse. Not that she would tell Surir.
"Right." Surir snorted. So apparently Dwin didn't have to tell Surir, she knew. Somehow. Dwin would swear the Dwin secretly knew everything, "How bad has it been, really?"
"Well," Dwin shuffled nervously. Dwin didn't want to talk about it but she didn't think Suri would let her get away from it, "I had a few nightmares. Nothing big."
"What happened in them?" Suri prodded, surprisingly her voice was gentle. Dwin wasn't used to this treatment. Only patients received that usually, and even then it was only the skittish ones.
"It's mostly the sounds. Sometimes it's Mazrlafm, you, or Bilbo." Dwin admitted sheepishly. She felt a bit like a child for having nightmares. She knew that even soldiers had nightmares, but for someone not even fighting to have nightmares... it showed that Dwin was weak.
"That is understandable. It is upsetting to almost lose your loved ones." Surir smiled at her. And Dwin broke down. She didn't know why that prompted it but one minute she's fine then the next she's telling Suri everything, almost in tears. How scared she was for everyone, how scared she was for Bilbo, and how she felt like a coward. Dwin was only glad that she was in her tent. Dwarves weren't supposed to cry in front of people, it was showing weakness.
Surir just hugged her and petted her hair, which brought Dwin fully to tears. She sniffled into Surir's shoulder, trying to calm down her breathing. Trying to remember that she didn't lose anyone. They were all safe and alive. Surir hummed something, the vibrations helping to soothe Dwin. Finally the sniffles subsided and it was quiet, the only noise was the bustle of the camp outside. They didn't speak but they didn't really need to. Dwin finally sat up, wiping her eyes. Surir gave Dwin a pat on the shoulder and left, leaving Dwin to her own company. Dwin sat with her knees up, hugging them to her chest. Not ready to face the world just yet.
Dwin was feeling lighter than she had in quite awhile. It was like a weight was gone from her shoulders, but it was a weight she hadn't realised that was there. With a grin, she got some water and soup for princeling. Taking them back to his tent she reapplied salves and put on more bandages before sitting down to drip the substances into his mouth. She hummed the lullaby from her childhood and talked about random going-ons in the camp. Dwin always tried to talk to unconscious patients, if only to let them know they weren't alone. There was a lull in her monologue as she started making some more of the salves that were low. As she was making it the entrance to the tent opened, bringing in a blond dwarf with crutches followed by a harried looking healer. Dwin recognizing the healer, Ámundur, he was only thirty years older than her. But ever since they had met they had mutually disliked each other. She smirked and turned to them.
"Can I help you two?" She asked cheerfully, throwing a blinding smile at Ámundur, he just scowled at her. The other dwarf barely acknowledged her rushing, as well as he could on crutches, to princeling's bedside. She moved to his side, she figured he was the brother. She made herself forget this was a prince and treat him like any worried family member. She racked her brain trying to remember his name, Gíli? Míli? Fíli, that was it.
"He's healing well and improving everyday. He hasn't woken up yet, but I suspect he will soon though." Dwin said, standing by the cot with the prince, but giving him some space. The princeling was healing and slowly but surely showing signs of waking up. The other healer scowling on the other side of princeling. She glared at him and told him to take a break, she'd watch over both of them. He complied with a sneer at Dwin, she just looked at him bemused. She turned to the prince, he didn't seem to be paying attention, just holding princeling's hand and staring. Dwin felt pity for him, she knew how scary it was to see your loved ones hurt.
"He did this to protect me." The prince finally bit out. Dwin almost jumped at the unexpected noise. She studied princeling as she answered.
"There's not much sibling's wouldn't do for each other." Dwin felt a twinge of guilt, as her first thoughts were of Mazrlafm. But she knew Dag was perfectly capable of taking care of himself and she would do anything for him, but Mazrlafm was more likely to need her. She returned to making the salves, giving them at least some semblance of privacy.
"How bad was he?" The question was asked tightly. Dwin sighed, it seemed as if the prince was beating himself up over this. But he had a right to know.
"It was worrying at first. He had a dislocated shoulder, has two broken ribs, and a head injury. But it's evident now that there's no internal bleeding, which was what I was mainly worried about. I'm still worried about his head injury, but I won't know anymore until I can speak with him. He will survive and he will wake." Dwin said quietly, using the smoothing voice, to help calm him. But she spoke frankly, because she thought that family members should know exactly what's going on. Dwin didn't face him, but kept on with her task. She heard the chair creak as weight was being put on it, and she was happy he was sitting down. He obviously needed to rest his leg if he was on crutches. She stayed in tent for another hour busying herself with things that she didn't really need to do. Fíli didn't leave his brother's side and didn't ask him to. Finally with a sigh she left, wondering what she could do. So busy with those thoughts she wasn't watching where she was going she tripped out of the tent and into something solid. Dwin blinked up to see Dwalin, looking at her with veiled amusement. She stepped away, heat rushing to her face. Thrice-damn her clumsiness!
"Thank you." She said finally.
"No problem." His thickly accented voice was still tinged with amusement. The amusement faded as he looked at the tent. He seemed very protective of the princes, who themselves were famous for being inseparable, "How's the lad doing?"
"I think," Dwin started, wondering about which one he was talking about and finally settling for both, "That them being together helps."
He looked at her and looked off, muttering something. He started walking only to pause and motion for her to follow him. Confused, Dwin hurried after him, almost tripping again. As she caught up, she had to walk rather quickly to keep up with his long strides. Finally they came to a tent which he entered without hesitation. Figuring she couldn't get in that much trouble with the tall dwarf, she followed him in. It was a big tent, but unoccupied. Dwalin practically shoved a straw mattress in her arms and picked up the wooden frame of the cot with one hand. Catching on to what he was planning, Dwin carried her load back to the princeling's tent. Following along quickly she caught up with Dwalin again. They got a few curious looks from passersby but both dwarves ignored them. When they got to princeling's tent Dwalin again entered without hesitation, Dwin rolled her eyes but followed. He set the cot down on the other side of the tent and Dwin laid down the mattress. Fíli watched them with a slight smile. Dwin smiled back and left, leaving both dwarves with princeling. Today had been a rather good day.