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It was a little past 3 A.M. when Dean woke with a start.
"Nooo!" He yelled out as he sat up in his cot and reached for the spot he had been stabbed. He took a moment to look around and realized where he was and that Michael was good and dead. Then he saw Cas and Jack laying on cots near him. "No." He whispered. "Guys?" Then he said, louder this time. "Jack! Cas! Hey!" Dean swung his tired legs out of the bed and stood to go to them when the IV in his arm held him back like a leash he yanked it out, tape, needle and all, with one quick wince. He made his way to Jack, who was closest. He gripped Jack's shirt into his fist and saw flash backs of Jack giving himself a lethal neck cut. He quickly checked his neck but only a light scar remained thankfully due to Rowena's quick thinking and skills.
"Jack, what were you thinking? Kiddo, I'm not worth this. Please be okay." He bowed his head and squinted back tears for a few moments.
"You have always been worthy of being saved, Dean." Jack spoke weakly.
"Hey, kiddo!" Dean was happily startled. "Just rest okay, don't talk. If you were fully human you'd probably be dead from all the blood you lost. You shouldn't have used that damn blade, kid."
"But, but I had to!" He protested weakly. "I knew Rowena could save my life and I had to get deep enough to get to my grace to get enough to Cas!"
"Cas…" Dean thought, as he looked over to the fallen angel but then focused back to Jack.
"I know kiddo. Just rest. Okay? And thank you. Thank you so much. You did good."
"Go be with Cas." Jack whispered as if he might wake the angel accidently. "He really loves you, you know...Don't tell him I told you!" Jack smiled and curled away from Dean and didn't see his ears turn red in the soft light of the hallway leaking in through the open infirmary door. Dean listened until Jack's breathing became regular and he was fast asleep again.
Dean sniffed as he tentatively caused the two steps it took to reach Cas' cot seem like a mile. "Hey, buddy." Dean was so nervous that he was shaking a little. If it was difficult to talk to him now, when he was unconscious, how was he supposed to do it with him eventually awake? "I um… thanks for saving my ass again. You really showed him! You… You were awesome!" He smiled proudly up at Cas' face that was unchanging and still. "I uh...I think by now enough people have told us we just haven't told each other. Michael spilled the beans all over the place but I'm pretty sure Sammy knew and probably told you too. Not to mention your mini-me over there. It's…it's actually been years now…and…God." Dean wiped a few tears from his face and he looked up at the ceiling in hopes it would make them stop. He took one deep breath to compose himself but it didn't really help. "I need you, Castiel." His voice cracked. "Please come back to me. Please be okay. I'm sorry…I'm sorry for being so damned selfish. Please, Cas, just please forgive me one last time and I promise I'll do better this time. I'll make it all up to you..." Dean now tightly gripped Cas' right hand between his two and again bowed his head prayerfully resting his forehead on their intertwined fingers. His escaped tears fell off his nose and seeped into the white sheet that laid over his best friend.
They had removed most of Cas' normal clothes and dressed him in a plain gray undershirt and some gym shorts, probably Sam's, that were way too big for him. He was neatly covered with a thin white sheet. Dean composed himself and decided to lift the sheet to see the damage and saw the tiny cuts and large bruises not to mention the untold injuries underneath taped gauze pads and clothes. Castiel's face was covered in splotches of an ugly shade of fresh purple mixed with maroon, but thankfully not swollen anymore. A strong piece of medical tape was stretched over the bridge of his nose that Dean remembered the sound of breaking all three times.
"You love me this much, buddy?" Dean's eyebrows crossed together as he felt the pain in his right hand returning. He looked down at his own fist that had inflicted the damage. Maybe that IV drip included some pain medication as well. His knuckles were wrapped under a loop of gauze but he knew Sam must have covered it just so he wouldn't have to see.
"If you get better, please don't ever let me do this to you again, Cas." At that, Cas shivered through his nose as goosebumps noticeably crested down both arms. Dean quickly put the sheet back over him like a child caught with his hands in the cookie jar.
"Oh, shit. I'm sorry!" He whispered frantically. "You don't have your coat and I bet your mojo must be at a record breaking low after all this. You must be freezing too, since you're practically human right now. Hang on a second. Be right back!" Dean continued on as if Cas could actually hear him then shuffled out of the room.
Soon enough Dean returned with the blankets from his own bed and a worn red hoodie. First he placed a blanket over the curled up half fledgling, who seemed to enjoy its comfort immediately as he settled into his pillow even deeper. Then Dean set his blankets on his cot and took the hoodie over to Cas. He gingerly reached across and pulled Cas upright but that's when he saw all the blood that had seeped out past the gauze on Cas' back and stained the shirt. "Jesus! What did you do? Is this… Is this from your wings?! Did you freakin' fly us here? I thought you convinced Michael or something!" Dean complained as he lifted his shirt and took the soaked gauze off to reveal two perfectly symmetrical wounds.
"Cas, buddy, no. Why?" One wound from each wing. "No no no no-no. This is bad. Dude, why can't you heal this up! C'mon this is important shit! Cas. Cas!" Dean shook Cas' shoulders abruptly and tried to forcibly wake him. Cas was a rag doll in his hands and Dean huffed out defeated.
Dean knew what he had to do but he was afraid to do it. The others possibly decided against it, thinking Cas would just heal up soon enough on his own. But Dean made the tough call. The wounds needed stitches in order to stop the bleeding or the near human angel would die before he could heal himself. So Dean turned Cas to his side and worked tirelessly until both the inner muscles and the outer skin were sewn up properly, cleaned, and covered with fresh gauze and tape. Finally, about an hour later, Dean pulled down the thin gray shirt, put the hoodie on him, covered him with more than enough blankets, moved his own cot till it was flush with his angel's and closed his eyes only to immediately falling asleep for several hours.
He woke up and saw Cas laying next to him still passed out. He reached over to squeeze the angel's hand.
"Should I give you two a moment?" Sam asked quietly with a grin that Dean saw once he spun around to find his little brother sitting in a chair on the other side of his cot.
"Geez, Sammy!" Dean chastised gripping his chest at his regretful sudden movement. "Shaad-up!"
"I'm sorry." Sam chuckled and beamed a proud smile. "We found you like this yesterday morning. I'm assuming you weren't sleep walking around the bunker, collecting blankets and putting stitches in Cas."
"No! I was awake!" Dean whined while he was still catching his breath and looking wild at his brother.
Sam kept up his laughing, stood up and placed a firm hand on his shoulder the way the brothers would, to wordlessly convey their happiness that the other was still alive. "I'll go get mom. She's been worried sick about you guys."
Sam walked out to the hall and turned left to find his mother. Dean picked his head up, looking over Cas and finding Jack still cuddled up in his blanket lightly breathing. Dean tossed his head back on the pillow and brought a hand up to pinch the bridge of his nose. "Son-of-a-bitch this is all my fault. Again!" He whispered to himself. After a few more seconds of angst. Mary came jogging into the infirmary where three of her boys rested.
"Dean!" She gasped seeing him moving his arm. She ran over and embraced him leaning over the cot to get the best hug possible. Dean reciprocated wholly and shut his eyes tight, happily engulfed in his mother's sweet smelling golden hair.
"Hey, mom. I'm sorry about this. I'm so sorry!" He mumbled into her shoulder. She only huffed and sniffled into his letting him know an apology wasn't necessary.
"You protected your brother. Saved Jack. You saved all of us. Don't you DARE say you're sorry!"
He sighed. "Yes ma'am." He agreed on the outside but still held the guilt close to his heart.
Mary stood upright, content with her reunion with her first born.
"How are they?" Dean begged.
"Well, Jack wakes up from time to time and he even ate a little about…seven hours ago." She looked at her watch. "He said he's just tired and wants to stay with you guys. I think he just needs time to recover."
"Good, good. That's great." Dean nodded. "What about Cas?"
"Actually, we have no idea. Sam thought maybe some grace would help him but Michael's disappeared when he…" May didn't know what to say.
Dean finished her sentence. "You mean when that son-of-a-bitch ripped his cheap prom dress, whined like a baby when his date ditched him and got what he fucking deserved?"
"Yeah, that." Mary wasn't too thrilled with his self demeaning words but agreed regardless.
Sam sauntered in, having heard Dean's explanation. "Dude, you're not a cheap prom dress, but maybe you were on sale."
"Knock it off, jerk!" Dean complained.
"Not in a thousand years, bitch." And both shared a grin.
Mary was so glad her boys were back together. "What's that?" She asked about the glowing blue syringe in his hand.
"So get this, I called up Claire and told her everything that happened. Mom, Claire Novak is Castiel's vessel's daughter." He hoped his hand motions clarified done confusion. Mary just signaled from him to keep going.
"So, then I explained how bad Cas made it out and that he wasn't healing. I know Cas had possessed her, however it was very short, and she probably had a bit of angel grace in her like I did before and I thought it would really help him heal up. I told her how and she overnighted it to us."
"Like in the mail?" Dean couldn't believe it.
"Yeah, we took out insurance on it and everything." Sam said proudly.
"Well, cause, you know, they'd replace it with something of equal value?! C'mon Sam! I can't believe you were that stupid!"
"Claire is in Botswana right now on a case and she wasn't going to be able to get here soon enough. Mailing it overnight made the most sense!" Sam defended their choices in the way the brothers would always bicker, like children.
"Geez, alright fine, just deliver the goods already, Mr. Mailman." Dean rolled his eyes.