CHAPTER VI
"Notebook"
Lucy's P.O.V:
Levy and I had been talking for a few minutes now, my food and drink was long gone, but it looks like we still have a lot of things to talk about. And, yes, I still did spare a glance at the guy from time to time, and I know for a fact that Levy is very much aware but only chose not to say a word about it.
Right now I was telling her something that happened to me at work.
"—and then when I was just about to finish, he landed another pile of paperwork at my desk. Can you believe that guy?" I huffed. "I'm just lucky that Cana was there to help me."
"Oh Lu, is that on a daily basis? I mean, that's just unfair." She said, frowning. "I know you're still new to the job but that's not a reason for him to treat you like that. I even know that you're very much qualified for a higher position."
"No, no. That's just one time Lev. My boss isn't as bad as you think. Uhm… Well, kinda." I told her then laughed. "But don't worry. I just caught him on a really bad mood that day. That's why."
"And thanks by the way Lev. What you said really mattered to me" I added then smiled.
"No problem Lu. Everyone who knows you would say the same thing."
"But, if you don't mind me asking…" She said but trailed off.
She leaned forward at the table and whispered. "What's the latest news on your soon-to-be novel?"
I just smiled at her but didn't actually give her an answer. It's just so much fun teasing this girl.
"Luuuu…" she said then pouted. I laughed out loud when I saw her expression.
"Alright, alright." I said still laughing. "It's far from reality actually. It's not finished yet. I only had made some drafts. And, noooo Levy, you're still not allowed to read it."
"But Luuuuuu..."
"No." I said sternly.
"Luuuuu..." she begged with her hands folded in front of her face. "Please?"
But I only stared at her with a blank expression.
"Hmpphh!" she pouted then leaned back on her chair. "Suit yourself Lucy Heartfillia. But I promise, one day I'm gonna steal it and read it to my heart's content." She said while pointing a finger at me.
I just shook my head and laughed at her, wondering if I was talking to a child.
"You're such a dork sometimes. You know that Levy?"
"Yeah I know. But you love me anyway." She stated then laughed. She was only cut off a second later when the bell rang. Again. I think that's the 6th time it rang since we started talking. So much for a "slow day" like Levy said.
Both of us didn't even bother to say anything. We just looked at each other then sighed. She shrugged a moment later and gave me an apologetic look that clearly says 'I don't have any option but to do this, sorry' before she left again to attend the customer.
I glanced at my watch and noticed that it's already quarter past one. I leaned back to my chair then thought of ways to distract myself again. I still couldn't get my mind off of this guy. It didn't help either that he's still playing his guitar, making me hyper aware of his presence. He's been going at it for an hour now and I am not so sure when will he stop. I closed my eyes and rummage through my brain again for 'new-ways-to-distract-Lucy'. Funny, but thinking of ways to distract myself actually helped me in distracting myself. But my moment of self-celebratory was ruined a second later by an oh-so-sexy-sound that was coming from this guy. I groaned then leaned my head back and brought my hand up to hide my face.
Oh, great. He's humming now. Ugh! Why does he always do that whenever Levy isn't around to entertain me? WHY!? Or maybe I'm just being aware of it now because no one's here to actually divert my attention. Does he know what his voice does to me? It feels like I'm melting into an unattractive pile of goo. Literally! I thought exasperatedly.
But even though I'm trying my best to restrain myself, another part of me still wants to look at him and see what kind of expressions his face makes right now. I don't know why but I'm really curious and it's taking all my self-control not to look at him.
I was currently having an internal conflict when I heard his playing and humming stop. I was hoping that he'd resume what he's doing but it didn't happen, instead, I heard a noise like 'something' had just bumped into 'something' then followed by 'someone' cursing. I'll admit that I was kinda relieved that this guy had now stopped after almost consistently playing for about an hour.
I opened my eyes and momentary look around the café, noticing that some of the customers are now looking at his direction. My curiosity got the best of me and I slowly looked at his direction too. I saw him struggling to place his guitar inside its case with only one hand while his other hand firmly gripped the phone on his ear. I wonder what's going on. I could see that he's in a hurry, shoving his phone in his pocket and all his other things in his bag all at once after placing his guitar.
He stood up and then looked around the café like searching for something or someone, but he just sighed after a moment then darted towards the door while gripping his guitar firmly, muttering a lot of 'sorry's' and 'excuse me's' along the way. He didn't even realize that he dropped one of his things when he passed in front of me.
"Hey!" I shouted to get his attention, but he didn't seem to hear it.
I stood and picked up what seemed to be his notebook and examined it. It's just plain black on the outside. Its edge was slightly torn indicating that it has been used quite often. I studied its covers for awhile before glancing outside at the not-so-present-guy-anymore.
He already left. Way to go Lucy. You missed your chance to give this back to him. I thought to myself while I made my way back to my seat.
I sighed.
"What am I suppose to do with this?" I said to myself as I fumble with it, looking at its front and back covers. There's nothing to look at anyway.
But then, I remembered him writing awhile ago. And it slightly gave me chills when I realized what the content of this notebook is. I slowly lifted the cover but slammed it down again with both of my hands.
"I shouldn't be doing this." I whispered. "I should just give this to Levy. Maybe she knows how to give this back to that guy, him being her childhood friend and all."
But a little peek wouldn't hurt, right? My inner voice tempted. And I guess she won cause I just found myself lifting the front page again. I just didn't expect the contents to be this… uhm… messy.
I quirked an eyebrow and studied the first page. Words, sentences and all kinds of chords jumbled into one page.
"How does he read this?" I asked myself while squinting my eyes, still trying to figure out how to read certain lines. "I couldn't even understand any of this."
But as I glance through the pages, I slowly realized that those first few pages were just like a scratch. It's like it had gone through the trial and error process and now, I am looking at a finished product, a beautiful and exquisite creation.
As a writer, I'm really impressed with what I am seeing right now. I can't believe he wrote all of this.
Just who is this guy? How could he write these kinds of lyrics? Where does he get his inspirations for these?
It's like a composition of feelings that turned into words. Some are deep and some are just… I don't even know how to describe it… I am now eagerly flipping through the pages, scanning it the best way I can.
These lyrics are beautiful. I thought. How much more if he put a melody to it. I guess it'll be perfect.
And as I was flipping through the pages, I noticed something that looks like an unfinished song. It's missing some of its lyrics or rather some of its lines. It's like the ones in those first few pages, but much more organized. I examined the written lyrics intently and felt my heart clench. I don't even know what inspired him to write these lyrics but it surely was very deep. It was like he was talking about everyone's expectations at a certain someone. Maybe it's everyone's expectation of him. I don't know. I was surprised that I was able to relate to his lyrics even though what I read was only partial. I can't help but remember the times when I was still on my hometown. It wasn't a very fun place to be, especially when everyone expects you to be someone you're not.
I just wanted to say to him in every possible way that it's gonna be alright, that it's okay to trip sometimes but you should get up everytime too. My hand itched to write its missing lyrics, my writer side taking over me every passing second. It's getting me frustrated, so I dug through my purse for a pen or a pencil, anything that I can use to write in his notebook and decided to end this frustration of mine.
My brain suddenly went hyperactive, arranging the words I needed. But when my pen was about to scribble the words, I found myself hesitating a little bit, debating whether I'm really making a good decision or not.
I don't even know if he'll like it or not. Will he think that it's good or I'm just plain annoying, writing on someone else's notebook without permission? Oh god. Now I think this is a bad idea.
I was thinking of not doing it but as usual my inner voice contradicted my decision again, saying that it won't hurt to try and write my feelings down. And guess what, she won again. This is just plain stupid. I'm starting to think that maybe I really am going crazy.
Well, here goes nothing. I thought and then with a final push, I started to write down the words I wanted to convey.
Maybe redemption has stories to tell
Maybe forgiveness is right where you fell
Where can you run to escape from yourself?
Where you gonna go?
Salvation is here
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened before
I breathed out a sigh of relief when I was done writing it. I lifted my hand away from the notebook and stared at it for a few minutes. Clearly, my handwriting didn't match the rest of its content but it didn't matter. I just really wanted to express what I was thinking.
Besides, it's not like he would go looking for the one who scribbled all over his notebook, right? Uhm... Right? I contemplated for a second then smack my face with my left hand.
Oh who am I kidding! Ughhh! Of course he'll be pissed at whoever wrote in his notebook. I thought a minute later.
"I just hope that it's just a moderate pissed." I whispered to myself while closing his notebook.
But it would be better if he actually like it, right? my inner voice said.
"Yup, that would be better." I mumbled to myself.
I was putting my pen back to my pouch when I heard my phone buzzed from a message. I checked it and saw that it was Cana.
Cana: Hey Lucy! I know we're both on a day off today but could you spare me some time? Please? I really need your help.
I frowned at her message but decided to respond to her immediately.
What could possibly be her dilemma now? I thought.
Me: Cana. What's the matter? Are you too drunk again to go home by yourself and at this hour?
Cana: No! That's not it. I'm at home and I'm not drunk. Well, kinda. But you know me, I can't live without my booze. But, that's not the reason I texted you… I kinda need your help with something. And I won't take no for an answer.
Me: Alright, alright. It better be worth my time Cana. If this was some kind of plan to lure me into drinking with you, I swear you're going to regret it.
Cana: Yes Miss Heartfillia. This is really an emergency. I'll just meet you somewhere okay? I'll text you the place after a few minutes. I'm just gonna get myself ready.
Me: Okay. See you in a few minutes.
I sent her my message then shove my phone inside my purse. I glanced at the notebook again and decided that maybe it's time for me to return this. So I looked around the café and searched for my blue-haired friend. I noticed that she's on the counter now, so I made my way towards her. I leaned slightly on the counter then called her to get her attention.
"Hey Lev."
She turned around when she heard my voice then looked at me with questioning eyes.
"Lu? What's the matter?" She asked me while tilting her head to the side. "Is everything okay?"
"Yes, yes, everything's fine. But… Uhm… I think that the guy back then had accidentally dropped this." I said coyly while sliding the notebook across the counter. "You know, the guy that was playing the guitar awhile ago."
I preferred to describe him that rather than her childhood friend. I just don't want things to be uncomfortable.
She furrowed her brows then looked at the notebook before glancing over the place where the guy was sitting awhile ago and noticed that he wasn't there anymore.
"I was about to give this back to him but then I saw that he already left." I stated rather quickly, my hand never leaving the black notebook.
She looked back at me quizzically and then at the notebook and then back at me.
"Uhhh… Okay…" she said, taking the notebook from my hand and smiled. "I'll give this to him when he comes back."
"Thanks Lev." I said, smiling back at her.
"Oh, you're already leaving Lu?" she asked while eyeing my bag.
"Uhm, actually yes." I said then smiled apologetically at her. "You see, Cana sent a message awhile ago and she wanted to meet up with me. She has some kind of problem. What kind of problem? That I don't know."
"Why don't the two of you just meet here?" she whined. "We've only talked for a few minutes, well, maybe an hour, and you're already leaving Luuuu."
"Oh Lev, that's really a great idea but I think you and your customers wouldn't appreciate it if someone oozing with the smell of booze will burst through that door right now." I said while pointing my thumb at the café's door.
She only sighed and then nodded gravely at me.
"Yeah. I guess you're right Lu." She said solemnly, but looked at me hopefully a second later. "But you'll be back right?"
"Of course." I told her quickly and then fumbled through my purse when I heard the sound of my phone.
While I was checking my phone, I could see her make her way towards me from the corner of my eye.
I looked at her then waved my phone slightly in front of me after checking it.
"Well, it's Cana." I said to her. "I guess I'll go now. I'll see you later Lev."
"Alright. Take care Lu. Come back as soon as you can. Remember, we still have a lot to talk about." She said then smiled.
We both hugged each for a moment then muttered a simple "bye" before I sauntered towards the door. I breathed deeply then stretched my arms above my head when I was outside the café. I couldn't help but think about the guy and his notebook again.
I'm sure he'll be back to get his notebook. I thought. I just hope that he won't be pissed when he sees that someone had written something in it.
I looked back and saw Levy smiling at me. I smiled back at her then waved for the last time before I turned around and hailed a cab.
a/n: Once again, i would like to thank those who took their time reading this fanfic ^_^