a/n: thanks to my reviewers! Also just a heads up there is a lemon in this chapter. For the most part this story has been borderline T rating, so in case anyone wants to avoid it, stop here. But I will say it's pretty mild for a lemon in the FF world, so nothing too crazy. Okay on with the show. =)

CHAPTER 6

That evening I sat down and flipped through the television channels. I ended up watching HGTV. I never liked the channel because it felt like work to watch it. It simply reminded me of the many renovations I could do to my own house. But for now it was something mindless I could watch and it did not make me think too much. I was still in a good mood thinking about the happy memories of Eric. I tried to hold onto that. It was better to remember him in that way instead of crying all the time.

The following morning I went off to the bookstore again. I drove into town and ran into Sam as I stopped for gas.

"Hey Sook! How are you?" Sam came over right away, concern etched onto his face. He was a good boss and I knew he really cared when he asked that.

"I'm okay, managing I guess. How's work?" I did miss going to the aquarium everyday.

"It's good everyone misses you though. Arlene keeps complaining about having to get her hands dirty since you're not there." He rolled his eyes. Arlene could be a real pain in the ass sometimes.

"So do you still want to come back to work soon? I know I said no before, but if it's what you want, then maybe it'll help take your mind off everything." Sam had really tried to push me into staying home and I had been fighting it. But now that I had this whole ghost thing going on... I really wanted the time off. I wanted to figure this out and selfishly I wanted to be able to visit Eric as much as possible.

"Actually I think you were right. Time off will be good for me, maybe I can start next week?" In one week I should have this figured out. If I didn't then maybe I needed to suck it up and get back to reality.

"Okay Sook, I'll give you a call sometime this week. You call me if you need anything." Sam gave me a quick hug before heading off in his pickup truck. I watched as the vehicle faded into the distance. I really had some good people in my life. Sam, Amelia, and Pam were all there for me. So were my parents and Eric's who actually lived only a half hour away from us. Well... just me now.

I got back to business and headed into the book shop. When I walked in the same red headed woman was there. "Back so soon?" She smiled at me.

She kind of gave me the creeps, I felt like she knew something about me. "Yes, just finished reading my other books." I started heading off to the paranormal section.

"I'm not surprised." Okay that was it! I turned on my heel to face the woman still behind the counter. No one else was in the shop that I could see.

"What is that supposed to mean?" I didn't like how mysterious she was.

"That I know you're here looking for answers." She still had a smile on her face as she walked from behind the counter and came over to me. "I'm Sophie-Anne, I own the shop. It's nice to meet you."

She offered me her hand. I was freaked out but I also had manners burned into my brain at a young age. So I took her hand cautiously. "Sookie, and what exactly do you know about me?"

She took in a sharp breath the second our hands met. "Are you here to find out more about your guardian angel? I can sense he's with you."

I pulled my hand back immediately. Sophie-Anne had done nothing wrong I guess I was just startled. "What? No..." I also did not completely believe her just yet. Eric could only appear to me at the lighthouse. There was no way he was here right now. Wouldn't I know it?

"I've never felt a presence so strong before. That's amazing. Have you seen the angel yourself?" She seemed curious and absolutely fascinated now.

"Um..." I was just uncomfortable. I did not know or trust this woman.

"I'm sorry, I come on a little strong sometimes. I'm a medium and a bit of a psychic, so that's why I find this so interesting. I can sense spirits and sometimes communicate with them. Let me prove it to you." Sophie gestured to a nearby table and chairs. They were meant for customers browsing through books but it was still early and no one else was around.

I was reluctant but I also wanted information. If she could help me figure out more about Eric it might be worth trusting her. I sat down across from her and this time she did not even touch my hand. She shut her eyes for a few seconds then opened them. I was expecting some weird humming or candles but none of that happened. It was actually pretty normal, if you could call it that.

"Your name is Sookie Stackhouse, you lost your grandparents when you were very young. Your father is Corbett and your mother is Michelle." She explained then paused for a second. Then she reached over and squeezed my hand before retreating again. "Sorry for your loss dear, you just lost someone very close to you?"

I nodded slowly. How had the world gone from simple reality to insane in the last few days? How could all of these things be real? I had been so sure ghosts were just fiction and spooky stories for kids. I guess I should have believed my husband.

"What if I told you I know who my guardian angel is?" Sophie-Anne's eyes lit up. I guess she did not get too many customers who were chatting with ghosts on the regular.

"Can you sense spirits as well?" She asked and I shook my head.

"Not until a few days ago, and I only talk to one ghost...so I don't know if that counts." I shrugged and stared at my shoes.

"You talk to it? Who is it?" She was hanging on my every word.

"My husband Eric, he died a little over two weeks ago." I whispered and fought hard to not let my eyes well up.

"Oh my god... that's amazing. He must be the male presence I sensed with you the first time you came into the store. He's looking out for you Sookie." She smiled softly.

"But you said guardian angel, Eric is just a ghost he's not an angel." That part confused me. I thought angels were supposed to work for God.

"I did. Some people believe angels are warriors of God and have never been human. In some cases that is true. But when it comes to guardian angels most of the time it's a spirit that was once human. It can be someone you never knew, just a soul that feels a connection to you for some reason and looks out for you. A man came to me one time and some woman from the 1940s was his guardian angel. He never knew her or her family. But he moved into her home and loved it the same as she did, because of that the spirit feels a connection to him. In your case it's someone who loved you in life and is still looking after you in the only way he can." Sophie explained then had to get up to check out a customer. She looked a bit peeved to be interrupted, but she also needed to make money.

I sat there trying to absorb everything she just told me. So Eric was not only a ghost but my guardian angel. I guess he sort of explained that to me. But it was nice to finally share this with another person and have them believe me right away. There was no question in Sophie-Anne's eyes. I could tell she believed everything I said. When she returned the store was getting busier but apparently she had one last thing to say.

"I've never sensed a spirit so strongly before, he must really love you." She squeezed my shoulder then turned to head to the register. She stopped short though and turned to me. "Oh and Eric says you won't be alone for long. Whatever that means..." She shrugged then rushed back to the forming line of customers.

What the hell?! Why did everything have to be so cryptic. Why did Eric have to give her one little weird blurb like that?! How was I not alone? Did he think I was going to start dating again? That sure as hell was not happening. Sophie-Anne was obviously busy so I was forced to leave without more answers for now. She waved as I left and I politely waved back. Maybe I could stop by again and see what else she knew, or just for the sake of sharing my stories about Eric with her. I just couldn't tell Pam or Amelia yet. They might not believe me or it would just make the healing process harder on them, knowing he was still around but they couldn't see or talk to him like I did.

I still had almost a full day ahead of me. I decided to let HGTV inspire me and went to the hardware store to buy some paint. Eric and I had talked about painting the bathroom light blue a million times and never got around to it. So I got the paint then headed home. Once I was set up with plastic laid out, painter's tape, and had my old clothes on I got to work. As I pushed the roller up and down the drab gray walls my mind wandered to another time I was painting.

Flashback two years ago...

"This is taking forever. Remind me why we wanted to do this?" I sighed as I put more yellow paint onto my paintbrush.

"Because you insisted that the kitchen needed to be yellow and cheerful?" Eric reminded me in a tired and slightly sarcastic voice. We had both been at work all day and for some crazy reason decided to paint our kitchen on a Friday night. We were tired and painting trim was no fun.

"I didn't say it like that. I just want things to look nice. This is our house, not just some apartment anymore." Eric and I had been married for about three months now, but we had only been in our house for one. We had already been living together at his apartment for awhile but we always planned on buying our own home so we never went crazy with decorating.

"I pretty sure you said you wanted the kitchen to shine like the sun on a spring morning." He grumbled and reached beneath the cabinets to paint more.

"You are such a grouch when you're tired." I mumbled and poured more paint into the roller tray.

"You know what?" I turned to face him, waiting for his snarky reply. All I got was him running his fingers over the paintbrush, sufficiently splattering my face with yellow paint.

What a jerk! I picked up my paintbrush fresh from the can, dripping with paint, and flicked it at him. A big blob of yellow paint landed right above his eye and started to drip down. At first he looked pissed off but then I started giggling. "You look ridiculous" The paint was dripping down over his eye before he smeared it away, spreading it over the side of his face.

Eric couldn't stay mad for long and he started smiling. I ducked beneath the table when he tried to toss more paint at me. "Ha! See I might be small but I'm agile."

"And I'm stronger." I shrieked as he grabbed my ankle and pulled me out from under the table. I was laying on my back on the linoleum floor. Eric was hovering over me with an evil smile on his face. The brush was still in his hand and he just held it over my face, letting it drip onto me. Jerk! He thought he won already. I stretched my arm out to the side and carefully dipped my hand into the paint bucket while he was busy gloating.

Then with a hand dripping in paint I reached up and smeared it into his hair and down one side of his face. "Ha! Take that!"

"Woah! Take it easy! I barely got you and now I'm dripping in paint!" He laughed and quickly dropped his paint brush so he could pin my arms to the floor. Now I had no chance, Eric really was stronger than me. But usually I liked that fact.

"Truce?" I offered and he seemed to debate for a second or two. Then he leaned down and kissed me.

"Truce." He grinned before pressing his lips to mine again. Thankfully they were not covered in paint. We did not finish painting the kitchen that night. Instead we spent it on the kitchen floor, half covered in the yellow paint that was supposed to be on the walls.

Present Day...

I poured more blue paint into the roller tray. This was going much slower without Eric around, or faster depending on how you looked at it. He was not around to distract me or pin me to the floor and rip my clothes off. I think I'd much rather have the painting take three days, and be having fun on the floor covered in paint. I sighed and tried to focus on my work. I needed to accept that Eric would never be here completely anymore. It was seeming like I would always have a piece of him though and I was starting to realize I was grateful for that.

When this first started I thought it would make everything more difficult. Thinking about Eric and having a bit of him seemed worse than just losing him once and for all. But now I was thinking about what Sophie-Anne said to me. How Eric must really love me if he was around... If she was into this ghost stuff, how many had she seen or interacted with? She looked a few years older than me, maybe 32 or so. I thought that gave her plenty of time to be a medium/psychic person. If she said Eric was the strongest presence she had ever sensed it had to mean something.

Eric was looking out for me and being there for me in the only way he knew how. He was also opening up my world, again. I thought he opened me up to all sorts of new experiences and hobbies when we started dating. Now he was gone and still teaching me something new everyday. I was learning there definitely was something more after this life and I would have someone waiting for me on the other side.

Hours later I was exhausted and finished my painting. The room was now a nice shade of pale blue and looked much brighter. I turned the lights off and headed upstairs for the night. I found my favorite pair of comfy pajamas in my dresser. They were yellow flannel with sea turtles all over them. They were a bit childish looking but I loved them. I smiled slightly when I climbed into bed, remembering how Eric used to call these pajamas my knight armor. You get it? I wear them at night and usually it meant he wasn't getting them off of me. Knight Armor. Haha! Yes he was a total cornball like that.

"You have the armor on I see."

I looked over and saw Eric laying next to me. I looked around the room then at myself. I had on my yellow pajamas just like when I fell asleep. But now Eric was here, so that meant it was a dream. It was starting to get easier to figure that out. I reminded myself to remember this well so I could talk to Sophie-Anne about it. Maybe she knew about dreams too. But I also did not want to waste my time with Eric thinking about her so I moved on from that quickly.

"Yes, doesn't really matter anymore." I said with a frown.

"You know I would never hold it against you if you moved on some day. I want you to be happy." Eric had rolled onto his side. I noticed he was shirtless and reached out to trace the black anchor tattooed onto his shoulder.

"I can't see myself ever doing that. But thank you." I whispered and ignored the slight sting of tears. For once I fought them off successfully.

"What did you mean when you said I won't be alone? You said it to Sophie-Anne too." I was still curious about that.

"You'll know soon enough." He reached over and pulled me closer. I was still amazed at how real these dreams felt. I could feel the warmth radiating off his skin and the slightly rougher skin of his hands from working outside for years. "Sophie-Anne is a little eccentric but she's a good person Sookie. You can trust her."

I could tell by Eric's expression he was not going to budge on the 'not alone' subject. He might be a ghost but I still knew my husband's expressions.

"I want to. I don't feel like I can tell Pam and Amelia about you. They won't understand." I was close enough that the tips of our noses were almost touching.

"Honestly I don't even know if they would be able to see me. All of this... after life stuff works pretty strange. I wasn't even sure you would see me, or know I was still with you." Eric explained and I could see that it had really bothered him that I wouldn't know he was around at all. "From the second the accident happened I tried to talk to you, touch you... but you had no idea I was there. When you finally saw me in the lighthouse I was so happy Sookie. Even to just have five more minutes with you seemed like enough."

My eyes were watering again. This time I blamed it on being a girl. When a man said something like that to you, what woman would not be tearing up?

"Does that mean you can leave the lighthouse? Just for some reason I can only actually see you there when I'm awake?" I had wondered how Sophie-Anne had sensed his presence before.

"Yes. I don't know why you're able to see me there. But I'm glad you can." Eric smiled softly, wrapping his hand around mine. "The night I died, those last few seconds... all I could think about was how I'd do anything for one more night with you."

"Well now you have it." I whispered. My hand moved up to the side of his face slowly moving over his jaw line. Eric closed his eyes with content. I did not know when I would wake up. It could be two seconds or seem like hours, but I refused to waste time worrying about it.

When Eric opened his ice blue eyes again he wrapped me in his arms and I melted into his embrace. He rolled so he was on top of me, resting his weight on his elbows. His forehead was resting against mine, his gaze telling me everything he couldn't put into words, or just did not have the time to while he was alive. I ran my fingers through his short blonde hair, trying to memorize the feeling. I thought I understood how much he loved me when we got married. Now I realized Eric and I were much more than that. 'Till death do us part' did not apply here.

Finally he pressed his lips to mine. It felt real and I had long forgotten this was a dream. It was a chance to be with my husband once more and feel some kind of connection. The kiss was slow and burning. You would think we were in a rush since I could wake up at anytime…. But this wasn't about something physical. It was about loving someone so much you just needed to feel them close, even if it was just for a second.

His tongue slid over my bottom lip and I parted my lips beneath his. My hands were lost in his hair and his in mine. We were clinging to each other desperately, trying to convey just how much we still needed the other. Eric moved down to my neck and the way his tongue swirled over my skin made a quiet sound escape my lips.

My own hands moved from his now disheveled hair to his bare shoulders. I could feel the muscles moving beneath his slightly tanned skin. Eric shifted between light sweet kisses on my neck, to intense french kissing that made me feel like I was on fire. Before I knew it he had all the buttons undone on my flannel armor. I had not even noticed him doing that. Was it because this was a dream or he distracted me? I didn't care.

I knew this was real right now. This was not just my mind, this was really Eric that I was sharing this dream with. I leaned forward just enough to pull my arms out of the sleeves and toss my shirt aside. When I laid back again Eric paused. His eyes were slowly traveling over my body. It was an expression I remembered well. His blue eyes seemed a shade or two darker with lust but behind that there was love, affection. However this time I also noticed the longing in his eyes.

I reached up and held the side of his face. "Hey, come back to me."

He leaned down and lightly pressed his lips to mine. "I'm sorry" He whispered close enough that his nose was still touching mine. He shut his eyes and for the first time it seemed like Eric was the one battling tears. "I miss this. I miss being with you, holding you."

"I know." There was not much more I could say. I agreed with him. There was this ache in me that only went away when I was sharing a dream with him, or seeing him at the lighthouse. I wrapped my arms around his neck, closing the distance between us and pulling him into another kiss. Eric's hands wandered over my newly exposed skin, settling on my breasts.

Meanwhile I did not want to lose an inch of contact with him so I used my feet to pull down the gym shorts he had on. He always used to wear those to bed so I knew how easily they slid right off that trim and fit body of his. He shifted around some, I'm assuming to kick the shorts completely off. Then he made quick work of ridding me of the last bit of flannel armor. My turtle pajama pants landed on the floor somewhere beside the bed.

Now I could feel every inch of his skin against mine. I wanted to hold onto him and never let go. As he started to slowly push into me his eyes locked with mine. I took in a sharp breath at the wonderful sensation of him filling me. I had never felt more connected to him than I did in this moment. It was more than just a physical connection, but an emotional one. It probably sounds crazy, but then again my life is crazy now… but it felt like my soul was connected to his. I could feel the loss he felt at losing his life so soon, the longing he felt over me along with the love, and the happiness he felt about still being able to communicate with me.

Once he settled himself over me I wrapped my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist. "I love you Eric."

His hips started to move and his mouth met mine in a searing kiss. The pace remained slow as it had been. It was like we were both dragging this out as long as possible, not wanting to part from each other. Who knew when we might get this chance again. Usually I woke up or was woken up by a sound off in the real world. But for once luck was on our side and I spent a full night sharing my dreams with the man I loved.

It felt like hours had passed but I really had no idea. Eric was now curled up on our bed, sufficiently spooning me with his enormous body. I always said he could be my human blanket. I didn't need a comforter with him. I could feel his breath on my neck and his heart beating against my bare shoulder. His arm was wrapped around my waist and his fingers lazily drawing circles on my stomach.

"You're probably going to wake up soon." He said with a sadness in his voice. Tonight was the first time Eric let me see how much this hurt him too. So far when I had spoken to his ghost or seen him in my dream, he was always trying to be supportive. I guess he was trying to help me get through this. But to be honest it was nice to know this was hard on him too. His sadness made him real, and it made it easier to accept this was 100% my husband and not me going insane.

"I know." I turned in his arms so I could see his face.

"But this isn't good-bye. I'll see you again. I can go to the lighthouse tomorrow." I ran my fingers lightly over his chest. I couldn't stop touching him, needing to feel he was right there with me. Eric seemed to be doing the same since his fingers were constantly drifting up and down my side.

"I'll see you there." He smiled and then it felt like everything was fading away. I reached out for Eric but he was blurry now. I felt one last gentle squeeze of his fingers around mine.

Then I was opening my eyes to spring sunlight filtering through my bedroom window. I rolled over to check the empty side of our bed. I did this every morning. I could feel my flannel armor was still on just as it had been last night when I went to bed. It was all a dream.

"But it was still real." I confirmed with determination. I finally believed, without a doubt in my mind, that it was all real. I got out of bed with two destinations in mind. The lighthouse and the bookstore.

a/n: thanks for reading, please pretty please write a review and share some of your thoughts with me? Yes, I will beg for reviews. I have no pride. =D