Taki was a normal village lad. Today, on a bright and sunny day like countless others before, he was walking down a forest path, enjoying the scenery around him as he made his way back to the small town he hailed from.
Unbeknown to him, three former Akatsuki members were hiding not even ten feet from him in the surrounding foliage, and plotting his murder.
"Let's just blow him up, un," Deidara suggested.
"If we blow him up, we lose the money," Itachi argued.
"This is supposed to be a robbery, not murder, dumbass," Hidan added. "I say we jump him, take the money, and-"
"What, sacrifice him, un?" the blonde finished, eyes narrowed at the Jashinist. "That'll make it blatantly obvious who did it!"
"It'll just look like another other Jashinist sacrifice!"
"How many Jashinists do you see running around, un?!" Hidan had no answer for that.
"I'll just henge into a robber and take the kid's money," Itachi finally sighed out. It wasn't the most elaborate of plans, but he was getting sick of listening to these two bicker.
"...That could work," Hidan stated.
Needing no further encouragement, Itachi quickly transformed into a rough-and-tumble looking man. He'd taken the liberty of changing his hair color, eye color, skin tone, and even the height. Aside from the impassive look on his face, nothing remained of the Uchiha. Not saying a word to his companions, the weasel stepped out of the bushes and began walking towards the boy.
Thirty seconds later Taki was lying face down in a ditch, and the three men were walking along the road with their money carefully tucked away in Itachi's cloak. "Remind me again why we sank to robbing helpless bastards like that," Hidan growled. A band of S-ranked criminals going around and stealing from helpless travelers was something not even Kakuzu would sink to do. If word ever got out, they'd lose all credibility as powerful, bloodthirsty criminals.
"Because we need to have cash to pay for food, clothes, and lodging, and since your former partner was such a miser, none of us actually have any money on us," Itachi replied in a bored voice.
"Wait, why are we getting clothes, un?" Deidara inquired.
"We can't exactly stay in these cloaks," Itachi explained, motioning down to their Akatsuki garb. "And as of now, each of us only has one outfit. New clothing is mandatory."
Hidan snickered. "Kakuzu never gave me a fucking cent for clothes, 'cause we didn't need 'em. We can get by just washing ours in a Jashin-damned river or something."
"And what happens if Deidara blows you to pieces, and you don't have anything to change into?"
"HEY! I wouldn't...well, I might...ok, I probably would do that, un."
"See?" Itachi pressed.
"And you can't go around naked, un," Deidara declared before Hidan could even suggest it.
"Tch, fine," the zealot conceded. "Paying for food, paying for clothes...and I bet you're gonna make us each stay in our own room at an inn, right?"
"Unless you want the receptionist to spend the whole night imagining us having an orgy, un," Deidara replied.
"You guys would give Kakuzu a heart attack," Hidan muttered with a shake of his head.
-n-
"I knew the Sharingan was powerful, but never to this extent," Pein murmured slightly. He was sitting behind his desk, almost completely hidden by the mounds of manila folders now sitting atop the oaken work area. Each and every one contained a detailed medical report.
"I don't get it!" Konan cried in an exasperated tone. "How can he remember you, me, the Akatsuki, and everyone else, but he has no idea who Itachi is?!"
"I've heard of techniques like this before," Pein muttered. "Gen jutsus that cause selective amnesia." The leader growled and tossed a folder behind him to land on the ground atop an ever-growing mound of discarded papers. Yet another useless file.
"How does that even work?" Konan grumbled.
Pein retrieved another folder, and began flipping through it before speaking. "Sometimes, a person endures an event so traumatic that their own mind decides to block it out, for the sake of the person's wellbeing. These jutsus are able to convince the brain that certain memories are bad, and in effect make the victim's own mind shut the events off. But in all of those cases, it was only to make the target forget the events that happened in certain hours our days! Actually being able to going inside another's head, and erase the memories of a single person without damaging anything else...it's unheard of."
"He must have taken a lot of care to do it," Konan murmured softly. "If Kisame couldn't remember anything, we'd have had to kill him."
"That's probably why Itachi only removed the memories of himself," Pein concluded. "He might have suggested where he'd run off to in passing or something, and decided to remove the memory. This way, both he and Kisame are safe."
"By if he cares so much, why did he leave Kisame behind?!"
"I have no idea." Heaving a sigh, Pein threw away the report in his hands, before picking up another.
-n-
Several small birds squawked and flew away when Zetsu emerged from a tree, looking around. "Tobi!" he called out. No answer.
Fusing back into the tree, Zetsu hurriedly transported himself to another plant. This time, it was a weeping willow, draping itself over a babbling brook. "Tobi, come here now!" Still no reply.
Another move brought him into a tree trunk. Nothing around here but flowers, insects, and a rabid mongoose. Wait, rabid mon-"GAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!"
Later that night, as he was roasting the mongoose over an open fire and dabbing iodine onto his wounds, he stared up at the night sky and sighed. "I miss Tobi."
"Shut up."
"But I want him here-"
"Shut up! He's just a stupid brat. Always running around, being all chipper, hugging us and saying how much he loves us and DAMMIT NOW I MISS HIM TOO!"
Both halves of Zetsu sighed, and looked back down into the fire, which was now glowing a shade of orange not unlike the color of Tobi's mask. "Tobi…where are you?"
-n-
Tobi yawned as the sun began to set. Foraging for food all day sure made you sleepy. His comrades seem to think the same thing, and were already scurrying away to their homes for a good night's rest.
Following their lead, Tobi went after a band of squirrels he'd become particularly attached to, and curled up at the foot of their tree. He'd tried sleeping in the tree itself on many occasions, but this always led to him not being able to get comfortable, or falling out of the branches. So now, he merely slept near his friends instead of with them.
As blackness started to creep into his vision, the masked boy heard a few of the rodents above him chatter goodnight to each other. Tobi let out a few clicks and squeaks of his own, earning more cries from the squirrels around him.
And as he drifted off, Tobi decided he very much liked having such kind squirrels for companions. Maybe it was all right that he couldn't remember anything about his old life. The way things were going now, Tobi had absolutely no desire to leave his current lifestyle.