Title: Scenes
Author: ZombieJazz
Fandom: Chicago PD
Disclaimer: I don't own them. Chicago PD and its characters belong to Dick Wolf. The character of Ethan has been created and developed for the sake of this AU series.
Summary: A collection of one-shots/scenes using the characters as represented in the AU established in Interesting Dynamics. The chapters currently represent scenes happening immediately after So This is Christmas. As I continue to update, they'll just provide one-shot snap shots into the characters' lives and likely some recasts of scenes from the show. This series focuses on Voight and his family, as well as Erin Lindsay's growing relationship with Jay Halstead. This is not a linear narrative with a beginning-middle-end. It's just scenes.
SPOILER ALERT: There are MAJOR spoilers in this collection from Interesting Dynamics and So This is Christmas.
"Hey, Magoo," Hank greeted as he carried the grocery bag into the kitchen and settled it on the counter.
Hank was a little surprised that Ethan was downstairs considering he'd likely overheard – or become collateral damage – in Justin and Erin's standoff. Sounded like he might have a couple reasons of his own to be giving his brother the cold shoulder too. But he likely was giving Justin the cold shoulder. Because Hank didn't doubt that his youngest had heard him and Erin come in the front door. Talking with Justin and Olive and Henry in the front room. But his boy hadn't come to greet him.
Something Hank had learned – at least with his family, his kids – was that if you made a habit out of greeting them when you got home. If you hugged them and talked to them and asked them about their day and let them know you were happy to be home and with them. If you didn't just disappear to get changed or take a shower or grab a nap or crash in front of the television. If you kept the routine of interest and engagement – they kept it up too.
Sure – Ethan didn't hang in the window waiting for Daddy's car to pull up the street anymore. He didn't run shrieking to the door looking for hugs and roughhousing. But he did appear out of the woodwork. He'd come out of his room. He'd move away from the TV or the computer in the den. He'd come to the front door and he'd allow the one-armed hug and endure the grilling about his school day even though the answers Hank usually got about the day anymore were one word: "Fine", "OK", "Whatever." Sometimes he got two words: "I guess".
Still – he valued that bit of time with his son. The bit of physical affection he was allowed to give his boy. The fact his kid still came to see that he'd gotten home safely. That he wanted him home safely. That counted for a lot. And it was those kinds of little things. Daily routines and mundanities that truly made up family and set up the structure of your life and the foundations of how your kids would treat others and eventually raise their own families. So he plugged away at it.
Ethan looked up at him from the table. He had his Snap Circuit set all sprawled out, completely engrossed in a project. His fucking dinosaur was sitting on the table with him. Standing guard. Or being his wingman. Likely a bit of both.
"Hi, Dad," he mumbled.
Hank went over and eyed the workbook and where Ethan was at with following the instructions.
"What you working on?" he asked.
Ethan put his finger on the project at the top of the page. "This one."
"Yea," Hank acknowledged. "But what is it?"
Ethan shrugged. "I don't know."
"Hmm …" Hank grunted and eyed his kid. "Well, I think you're going to like it." Ethan glanced at him and Hank tapped at the text of the project name and the description of its objectives. "Read it," he ordered gently.
Ethan gave him a frown and shook his head. Hank let out a little sigh and watched his boy snap some of the circuits together. His hands weren't shaking that badly that afternoon. That was a good sign.
It was interesting watching E with the kit. He definitely got the sense that Ethan liked that it was something where he didn't have to read a lot to understand. There were a lot of written instructions with each project. The learning objective was outline. An explanation of how the circruity and various components worked was all written out if it was introducing a new concept that wasn't covered earlier in the books. But every project was also illustrated with a step-by-step placement almost like Lego, showing how to place the various parts. That was something Magoo could follow along without having to laboriously process the text and jargon.
The thing was, Voight didn't think it was all jargon to Magoo. Some of it he'd likely picked up from Mouse but other aspects of it – E just seemed to intuitively know. Whenever E brought over his finish project to show off his creation, Hank was making a point of asking him how it worked. Ethan fucking knew too. Could explain what the various parts did. How it was all making it work. It was really strange to see him process it. To understand it. But it was making him proud.
It felt really good to see his boy doing something that was educational. Not just educational – but vocational. And to not see him struggling feverishly with it. It wasn't a chore. It just was something he was good at. They all needed that.
"You want me to tell ya?" Hank asked.
Ethan shook his head. "No," he said. "I want to see."
Hank nodded and watched him place another piece and reached to smooth down some of his static locks. The kid had likely been sleeping in one of his beanies all afternoon. Bed head, hat head and static all combined together. No wonder his kid always looked so unkempt.
"How you feeling?" he asked.
Ethan shrugged at him. That usually meant not great.
"You take a leak since you've been home?" he asked.
Ethan cast his eyes over to him and shook his head. E and Erin had been stuck in the hospital for an extended period after they'd pulled out the catheter because they weren't going to let them leave until Ethan emptied his bladder on his own – and did it without pain or blood. It'd taken a while and several bottles of water before Ethan was able to take a leak. And there'd been pain and blood – so now they had fucking anti-biotics added to his mix of drugs on top of everything else. And, he was going to have to start pissing regularly on his own, if they wanted to keep the catheter out.
"You been drinking?" Hank asked.
"I stayed upstairs," he said quietly. "Until it was home time. But you guys are late."
Hank flopped the front and back of his hand against Ethan's forehead, just making sure things felt kosher.
"I know," he allowed. "Sorry, Kiddo. I'm going to get some dinner on the table for you soon."
"I ripped up the lettuce, put out the ingredients and set the dining room table and set out the plates," Ethan told him.
Hank gave him a thin smile and a little squeeze of the shoulder. "Good man," he told him. "That's a big help."
Two lines he'd realized that he might not have said to his two older kids enough. They were words Ethan definitely needed to hear, though. Make his contributions have value. Keep him participating. And keep him moving forward.
Voight wandered over to the tap, switching it on and letting it run cold while he pulled the few fresh ingredients out of the brown bag and set them on the counter. Got the skillet out, drizzled it with oil and then started to work at getting it warmed up. Then he went and grabbed a glass from the cupboard, filled it with water and retrieved Ethan's pain pills from the top shelf of the highest cupboard, taking them back over to his boy. He put the glass next to Ethan, who glanced at it, and sat across from him while he popped the lid on the pills.
"You hurting?" he asked.
Ethan cast him a look and gave him another shrug. Getting his son to admit he was in pain was another chore. Ethan was likely to try to tough through it. It was a good thing in some way. He wanted his boy to not turn to pills as a cure all. To be able to tough through things to a point. But he also didn't want his son to be toughing through so much that he was constantly living in a state of pain.
"I wanted one before but J say he didn't know where they were," Ethan informed him. "I told him but he said he wasn't gonna give me one."
"Hmm …" Hank allowed and cast a look through to the front room. Pretty much looked like hell was frozen over in there with the chill factor going on between J and Erin. Olive was trying to keep it friendly and H was oblivious. But still. "Likely best J doesn't get involved with your pills," Hank conceded. "He doesn't know what's what."
Ethan eyed him and then provided, "I don't want one now."
"Mmm …" Hank grunted and weighed that some more. He didn't really believe him. So he just put one on the table, next to the glass. He'd see if it was still sitting there in a bit. "Tell you what, Magoo, you gonna be spending a good chunk of the day alone, if you haven't taken one yet that day – I'll leave one with you to manage on your own. I can trust you with that, right? There won't be any of this hoarding and selling the shit again."
"No," Ethan allowed.
Voight nodded. "And there isn't going to be any of this trick the kid at the gym showed you. Snorting the pills."
Ethan eyed him again. "You can feel it better and faster that way," he said.
Hank shook his head. "You can feel it just fine swallowing it down. I don't want you getting in the habit of shoving powder up your nose. I catch wind of you doing that again and there's not going to be pain pills in the house. You need a pain hit and we'll have to go into the E.R. and wait for them to give it to you as a drip. We clear?"
"Yes," Ethan said quietly.
Hank nodded and rose from the chair, moving back to the cupboard to return the pills and really starting into getting his sauce going. He cast frequent glances Magoo's way. He didn't hold off too long before he ended up taking the pill and chugging most of the glass of water. Kid was likely dehydrated from sleeping off the IV all afternoon in the bunk room that Hank had a gas heater and electric blanket going in for him. E had on the oversized heated hoodie he'd borrowed for him too and when he'd touched his kid, he'd still felt cold. No bulk to him. No circulation. Just not generating any heat. Voight didn't know how to get him warmed up. Was about at the point he thought he was going to have to outfit him permanently in long johns, get him flannel lined jeans, buy him his own battery-powered hoodie and socks and then bundle him up in Carharts. Maybe that would keep him from being an ice block.
He hadn't been at his cooking too long when Justin appeared in the kitchen, casting a look at Ethan.
"E, go hang with them in the living room. I gotta talk to Pop," he ordered.
Voight cast Justin stern eyes and held up a hand at Ethan, who was clearly reluctant to move or follow orders from his brother.
"He's fine where he is," Hank said to his oldest boy. "He's doing his thing."
J shot him a look but then stormed off and slouched against the counter next to the stove. No offer to help. No initiative to do a bit on his own. Couldn't even offer to fill up the fucking pot to get the water boiling. But that had always been Justin. Wasn't much in the way of chores – especially ones in the kitchen. Not that Hank thought cooking was a chore. Part of being the man of the house – the husband and father – was providing. Getting the food on the table. Sure – being able to have the cash flow to do that for your wife and kids was one thing. But you were missing out on the more fulfilling part if you never rolled up your sleeves and made your family a fucking meal. If you didn't have a set of dishes that your kids knew it was Dad who made and ones they looked forward to and asked for. You had to get some of your meals on your kids favorite list. Ones they kept coming home for. Ones they asked for the recipes for to make for their own kids or their own roommates or just because they needed a taste of home. That was part of being a man too. But somehow he'd missed out on getting that drilled into J's head. He was doing better with Ethan there. Slowly teaching him how to cook. Do meal prep. Help out.
Sometimes time gave you perspective. Maturity. Past experiences. Maybe he'd end up doing the whole dad and parenting thing the third time around. Maybe the girl who snagged Magoo would be luckier than she knew. That could be his hope. A goal.
"Look, Pops, I don't know what Erin told ya," Justin started.
But Hank held his wooden spoon at him to silence him. "We aren't doing this now," he said sternly.
Justin gave him a pleading look. "Pop, c'mon. I'm going out tonight. You got me takin' Eth to the movie tomorrow—"
Voight gave him a sterner look. "I don't have you doing anything," he said firmly. "You told your brother you were taking him to a movie while you were home. That plan changed – you take it up with him. Not me."
Justin sighed. "I just mean—we're rolling out Wednesday morning. If we don't chat about this now. When we gonna talk about it?"
Hank looked at him sternly. "We aren't," pressed and looked over at Ethan. "Magoo, you want rigatoni or fusilli?"
"Spaghetti," Justin provided.
Hank cast him eyes. "Wasn't asking you," he said. Justin near rolled his eyes at him but he just moved his look back to Ethan, softening his look for his younger son.
"Is it the rice pasta?" Ethan asked.
"Rice pasta?" Justin groaned. "Like Asia noodles? For Bolognese?"
"It's brown rice pasta," Hank provided for Ethan's sake but directed firmly at Justin.
It annoyed the fuck out of him how little J was absorbing about Ethan's diet. He'd protested some of the shifts in their traditional holiday menus already. Put on a show. Like his twelve year old wasn't noticing the absence of this shit on a daily basis for his brother to be pointing out that it was missing from their holiday plates. And Hank had been less stringent with E the past few days. Planned to be straight through until New Years. Let Ethan have a few treats – in moderation. Then it's his son in his 20s that he's hearing fucking whining from. He hadn't heard a peep about it from Ethan – even when the chocolates got set up out of his easy reach and the cookies and leftover gingerbread cake got taken into work that day. But J? Different story. Even Olive had said something about it to him and his fucking dense skull hadn't absorbed it.
"Fusilli," Ethan said confidently. "It's easier and gets LOTS of sauce."
Justin made a face but Hank just shot him another disapproving look, going and getting the bag of store-bought pasta opened and reading the boil time. Seemed like every kind of this brand was different. But at least this stuff wasn't a fucking sticky mess of mush when you were done with it. Actually looked and tasted like pasta. Didn't sit as heavy in your stomach either. Hank still preferred to make his own fresh but this was pretty decent as far as dried, store-bought shit went.
But Justin just kept eyeing him. "Pops … seriously …" he pleaded.
Voight gave him another glance. "From what I've heard about it, when we can talk about it is after H has his first ear infection. After he's got his first fever in the middle of the night and you've got him in at Emergency."
"Pops—" Justin sighed.
Voight shook his head, giving a small glance into the front of the house as he heard a knock at the door. He saw Erin head for it. Must've seen Halstead come up the stoop.
But he shifted his dead serious eyes back to his oldest boy. "When that happens, son, I want you to take some time to think on what you're thinking and feeling in those moments. Not just then. Not at the hospital or in the doctor's office. The lead up to the decision to take H in. And then those hours or days after you get him home. And after you've really taken all that in and done some serious reflection – you call me up and we can have a real long chat about whatever the hell went on between the three of you today. Until then, J, I'm not listening to anymore about it. It gets your sister upset. It gets your brother upset. The tension is upsetting your wife and baby. And all of it just fucking pisses me off."
Justin let out a slow breath but let his hands fall away from his slouch against the counter and he started to trudge out. Voight watched. Jay and Erin were coming into the kitchen, just as J left and he did the best to give them both pissed off glares. His two young detectives returned just as steely eyes, Erin leaning against the doorway and crossing her arms, making sure to really glare down her brother as he passed. Blocking so much of the entranceway, it forced Justin to nudge into her and try to tower over her with his dirty look. Still fucking moody-ass kids – even now.
"Hi, Sarge," Halstead offered after the Showdown Show moved on. "Thanks for inviting me."
Voight gave a shrug and turned back to what he was doing but Halstead got back into his line of sight and held up a bag of store-bought brownies at him, jutting his head over in E's direction.
"Gluten-free and dairy-free," he offered quietly.
Voight let out an inward sigh. His son couldn't fucking get it and then ten seconds later he's got this ass-wipe here that does. Because he was with Erin? Because he'd dealt with a mother who was sick? Because his brother was a doctor? He didn't fucking know. But he didn't know if it made him feel better or worse knowing that fucking Halstead got it and his own son didn't.
"Sugar?" Voight put to him.
Jay glanced at the back of the bag. "Sixteen grams per two."
"Yea," Voight allowed and waved him over to his kid. "Two."
Ethan would be hungry – even if it was eating dessert before dinner. And if he'd put two of the brownies in his stomach, Voight might be able to chase it with the night pills. Get a bit of a jumpstart rather than the fight to get him to eat some dinner so he could get his pills.
Erin gave him a thin smile at his allowance. But he just shook his head. "You need some help, Hank?" she offered.
And his own annoyance with Justin blossomed a bit more. His disabled kid readies the salad and sets the table. His kid who's been in the hospital with his sick kid all morning and then putting in more than a day's work all afternoon and evening is the one offering kitchen help. And Justin? Who should still be in the period of trying to impress his wife and do penance to his family – play fucking nice with everyone – waltz in and out of there with ruffled fucking feathers.
Hank waved her away, though. "I'm good," he said. "You're supposed to be enjoying your nephew. So go enjoy your nephew."
She gave him a little shrug and shifted her eyes to look at Jay, who'd planted himself at the kitchen table with Ethan. But apparently she was satisfied that the two of them were OK and that he wasn't going to bust Jay's balls and she retreated too. Hopefully to cuddle Henry – not to stand-off with Justin again.
"Heard you had a kind of shitty day," Hank heard Jay say to his boy as he settled the bag of desserts on the table. "And my Mom used to say that chocolate fudge brownies were the cure all to any bad day." Ethan eyed the bag and Jay reached to open it for him, looking inside. "Now, hers were homemade. Actually, we usually made them together after that super shit day. But these don't look half bad." He tilted the bag at Ethan. "Want one?"
Ethan eyed his cautiously and cast Voight a glance for permission but as soon as he spotted the nod, his hand at fumbled in, pulling out one of the bite-sized treats. Voight allowed a little smile at that and went back to working on the sauce, listening to the two of them at the table.
"You know what else I hear?" Jay asked as Ethan swallowed his first bite. The kid shrugged. "That we're going to be doing burgers and a movie later this week." He held up a fist for a fist bump. Ethan complied. "What we going to see?"
Ethan shrugged. "I don't know. I guess it depends on what Justin takes me to tomorrow."
Jay made a face like he was considering that. "Yea, well, you know, I can find someone else to see Star Wars with if I have to. It's OK." Ethan gave him a thin smile and Jay leaned forward. "You know what else looks pretty killer?"
Ethan sat up a bit straighter. "What?" he asked excitedly.
"In the Heart of the Sea. Big ass whale. Moby Dick. Awesome CGI. Might be better than Star Wars," he argued.
"It's not going to be better than Star Wars," Ethan provided.
Jay shrugged. "Yea. You're likely right. But I think it's going to be pretty great. So what do you say?"
Ethan shrugged back at him. "Yea, OK," he allowed. "If I've seen Star Wars. If not – I want to see that."
"Well, Frackin' A, Kid. Obviously if we both haven't seen Star Wars – we're going to see that," Jay agreed.
Jay leaned back in the chair and eyed Voight for a moment. He could clearly tell he was being observed but Hank just kept puttering away with dinner. He was slowly getting used to seeing Ethan have interactions with Jay. He'd had to. It'd developed over the summer. It just developed more into the fall and now it was clear it wasn't going to end.
He hadn't said it to Erin. But he knew Justin was jealous of that too. Hank didn't know what to say about it, though. He thought Justin had a right to be jealous in some ways on that front. Another man was moving in with his baby brother. He was getting to do some of the fun things that brothers wanted to do with their kid brothers. But even if Jay was getting some of that – Halstead had also endured some of the dirty work of his partner-friend-girlfriend-lover-fiancé having a sick kid brother too. He'd had to share time and attention. He'd had to deal with outings and visits and activities crashed by E. Things put on hold because E showed up or needed Erin's attention. Halstead had been in the hospital. He'd ended up cleaning piss and vomit. Voight had heard as much. And, he didn't doubt that Halstead could likely list off more about E's condition and his pills and his treatment plan than Justin could. Understood it more. But he was there and Justin wasn't. And it meant that he was more informed. He'd endured more of the crappy shit of it all and he'd earned some of the fun things.
Voight couldn't really rob Ethan of that relationship. Trying to regulate it too much would be just a tedious and turbulent as when he'd tried to regulate Erin's relationship with Halstead. It'd blow up in his face. Erin would despise him for it. And in the end – he wouldn't have a hell of a lot of say.
At least Halstead seemed to mostly respect his boundaries and his rules when it came to his youngest. Voight just had to cope with him being around and cope with him having a relationship with his boy – not just his daughter. And it was best they all wrapped their head around that now rather than later. Especially now.
"I think your whole holidays are going to be worth bragging about," Halstead continued to philosophize with Ethan. "First – you got some pretty awesome stuff for Christmas. Erin told me you guys got the order in for your shoes?"
"Yea!" Ethan nodded heartedly. He was so excited about those shoes. Hank wouldn't have even thought of that. Didn't even know you could design your own. This is why his kid need siblings – not an old fart like him. "They're supposed come in two weeks."
"Awesome," Halstead allowed and then held up another finger. "And you went skating and played sledge hockey. That was pretty bad ass." Ethan nodded and Halstead popped up another finger. "And you went to a Blackhawks game." Ethan nodded again. Another finger went up. "You're going to get to go to two movies."
"And burgers," Ethan clarified.
"And burgers," Halstead agreed and then popped up another finger. "You're going to hit up the fishing hole with your dad."
Ethan nodded even more excitedly at that and Hank felt his balls retreat into himself at the thought. But at least he'd get some time with his boy when he was happy about something. How'd they do with it or how long E would be able to handle the cold – that was another story.
"On the weekend," Ethan said.
"And!" Halstead said, waving a final finger. "I hear you're having a movie marathon on New Year's Eve."
Ethan didn't nod as excitedly at that one. "Yea. But it's just me and Dad watching movies."
Jay shook his head and leaned forward across the table. "You kidding me? I thought I was invited to this thing?"
Ethan eyed him. "I don't think Erin wants to come."
Halstead made a pft sound. "Whatever. She wants me to buy her a couple drinks at Molly's then I think we're going to come hang out here for a movie or two." He lowered his voice. "Let you in on a secret …" Ethan leaned in. "Your dad stocks better beer than that dive."
Voight let out a small sound at that and cast Halstead a look. Jay gave him a thin, smart-ass grin. The guy had some balls. He straightened in the chair.
"We have fajitas too," Ethan said. "And nachos. With everything. Anything you want on them."
"Fajitas and nachos?" Halstead put back to him. "I'm so sold. Erin doesn't want to come over – whatever. She can do what she wants. I'm here."
Ethan smiled shyly at that. "I have to pick out movies to watch," Ethan told him.
"Yea, I think we might be able to convince Erin to come if, you know, New Year's doesn't include like sixteen hours of Star Wars," Jay said.
Ethan sat back in his chair thinking about it. "She said that Dad wouldn't let me watching Walking Dead," he said, casting a look Voights way.
"You aren't watching Walking Dead," Hank confirmed without even looking.
"Umm …" Jay thought about it and shrugged. "Yea, well, it's a few days away. We can powwow on it."
"We could go to laser tag!" Ethan suddenly blurted.
Halstead made another thoughtful sound. "Don't know, Kid. I think it will be a little busy that night. Likely be more fun if we go another day. Next week. 'Kay?"
Hank could tell Ethan was projecting disappointment even from where he was standing and glanced over.
"Hey, I'm still going to take you," Halstead emphasized. "This week is just pretty busy with all your other plans. Don't want to wear you out. And, seriously, if the three of us have the place like to ourselves just against like one other group. It's going to be awesome. Trying to shoot up a crowded arena?" He shrugged. "No challenge to that. Fish in a barrel."
"OK …" Ethan conceded. "But I really want to go."
"Oh, we'll go," Halstead stressed again.
"OK," Ethan allowed again.
"So, to me," Halstead said again, "it sounds like even if today might've been kind of shit – your holidays … pretty epic."
Ethan smiled a little at that. Hank allowed a thin one too. He liked the idea that his boy got a decent break – especially after the few weeks he'd had. Especially when Ethan was already stressing about having to go back to school and to do so on the crutches.
"Hey," Halstead added, "I bet that even today wasn't all shit. I mean, you've got brownies now, right?" He tilted the bag for Ethan to take a second. He happily did.
"Yea," Ethan agreed.
"So besides the hospital, what else did you do?" Halstead asked.
Ethan shrugged and gestured at his project. "I made this."
Halstead examined it. "What is it?"
"I think it's some kind of sound maker," he said and tapped at a component on the board. "That worked as a speaker in some other projects. But I'm not done yet, so I don't know."
"Cool," Halstead nodded. "What else?"
"Mmm …" Ethan puckered but then his eyes got big. "Played Jurassic Park. But I'm stuck and Justin sucks. Maybe you can make the jump?"
Halstead shrugged at him. "Let's check it out."
Ethan retrieved his crutches and pulled himself up, starting to click rapidly for the door. Halstead rising to follow, casting a small look at Voight.
"Halstead," he said and gestured him over.
He hesitated a moment, looking off into the front room, like he didn't want to come. But then he moved over to the counter. Voight set Ethan's day's pill box on top of a glass of water and tapped the second last box in the row of sorted pills.
"See if you or Erin can get him to down those before dinner," he said.
Jay gave a little nod and took them. "Sure," he allowed and picked up the items.
But Voight moved to catch his eyes more directly. "Thank you," he emphasized.
Halstead eyed him a moment. Reading the look. But shrugged. "Yeah, sure. No problem," he allowed and moved to follow Ethan. To join his fiancé. To be in the front room with the rest of the kids. Which likely meant dirty looks from Justin.
But Voight knew that he could hold his own in there without barely batting an eye. So he just turned back to finishing up dinner. And he wondered how for Halstead it was all "no problem" and for his son it so clearly was.