You guys are amazing! Thank you for your continued reviews. It's wonderful to know how dedicated the readers are to this story. I would have updated last night, but I got dragged along on a bit of a road trip. But the chapter's here now. It took a lot of debating and thinking to figure out where I wanted to go with this one, but I stand by my decision. I hope you guys enjoy it and continue to review!

"Haley!" Nathan called upon entering her dorm room. After finishing with the first practice, which turned out to be just as grueling as their conditioning workouts, and taking a shower, he knew he had to find Haley. Everything Grant had said had really shaken him up, and hearing someone talk that way about a girl as amazing as Haley had his temper raging. He was shooting glares in Grant's direction for the duration of practice and even got called out on it by the coach a couple of times. Apparently it was time for him to be reminded that basketball was a team sport. But as soon as practice ended and they were back in the locker room, Grant continued to make nasty comments about Haley. Once again Lucas and Jake had to hold Nathan back, but he was rearing and ready to go. "Haley!" he called again, his eyes frantically searching the small space.

"She's not here," Brooke spoke up from her bed. Three separate fashion magazines were sprawled out in front of her, and she appeared to be reading all of them at once. It was a little frightening.

Nathan took another quick look around just to make sure. "Where is she then?" he asked, running a hand through his hair feverishly. He didn't mean to be acting like such a psycho, but he needed to talk to her and find out just what had happened between her and Grant. Surely, a girl as smart as Haley saw right through him. The guy was a total jackass, and he always had been. None of the other players liked him, and they only tolerated him because he helped them out on the court. He was one hell of a player.

"Not my turn to watch her," Brooke mumbled sarcastically. As she looked up and got a good look at Nathan, she furrowed her brow. "What's wrong with you?"

With a sigh, he made his way to the door. "I need to talk to Haley. You really don't know where she is?"

Brooke shrugged and picked up one of the magazines to get a closer look at something on one of the pages. "She said something about the library after class, so maybe there."

Nathan nodded and thanked her before rushing out of the room to head to the library. It took him all of about five minutes to get there, and after making his way through the entire structure he finally found Haley sitting at one of the back tables. She was alone and appeared to be studying. She had the look on her face which she only got when she was concentrating really hard or trying to figure out a complicated problem. "Babe," he called as he approached her table.

Haley smiled when she heard Nathan's voice and looked up from her notes. "Hey," she greeted him, leaning up to peck his lips. She motioned for him to sit, and once he had she asked the million dollar question. "What are you doing here?"

"Did you, um…I don't want to sound weird about this, but did a guy walk you to class this morning?" he asked cautiously. He didn't want to sound like an overbearing boyfriend; that was the last thing Haley needed with her dad and brother acting so out of whack. He knew how childish they made her feel, and he didn't want to make that worse for her. But he needed her to know that Grant was a bad guy.

Haley set her pen down and looked up at him. "Um, yeah. Why?"

Nathan sighed and leaned forward in his chair. "Just be careful, okay? I know him. He's on the basketball team, and let's just say that when he got to practice Lucas and Jake had to hold me back." There was no point in lying about any of this. Nathan wanted to prove to Haley that he was being completely open and honest with her so that she felt she could do the same. It was all about give and take, and he was slowly learning that.

"Why? Did he say something?" Haley questioned. After he nodded, she asked, "What did he say?"

He shook his head and took her hands from across the table. "It doesn't matter. And I'm not trying to control you, okay? Just look out around him. He doesn't exactly have the purest of intentions with girls."

Haley nodded and answered slowly, "Okay. But…didn't you kind of used to be just like him? I mean, just a few weeks ago you were doing the same stuff, right?"

"Haley, I was never as bad as Grant," he replied. "Believe it or not; I still had some form of social decency. He doesn't."

"Okay," she said again. "I'll be careful."

He stroked his thumb along the back of her hand and smiled lovingly at her. "Thank you."

A week passed, and things between Nathan and Haley stayed positive. In a way, they were moving forward in their relationship, but a part of Nathan couldn't help but feel like they were standing still. She still hadn't opened up to him about her past, and he'd be lying if he said it didn't bother him. It wasn't even so much that she was keeping something from him but that he didn't know the severity of it. God, anything could have happened. And he hated the word "incident" now. It sounded so serious. And he hated that he couldn't keep himself from being so overprotective of her; he honestly couldn't help it. Every day he went to practice, and every day he had to listen to Grant spout about how hot Haley was and about all the things he wanted to do to her. Apparently he had walked her to class twice more, and Nathan just couldn't understand it. Haley was letting this pig into her life, and she wasn't even thinking twice about it. But when Nathan had made a move on her, she had resisted tumultuously. But he bit his tongue as often as he could, both about her past and her current relationship with Grant. He didn't want to be the start of any unnecessary fights, especially when they were still getting to know each other.

But with each passing day, Nathan grew more and more attached to his girlfriend. She was amazing, and he couldn't get over the fact that she had chosen him to be her boyfriend. It was very surprising because, especially in Nathan's eyes, she was so much better than him. In fact, she was the best person he knew. And apart from Grant, he saw himself as the worst. Maybe that whole "opposites attract" theory really was true.

Haley lit a few candles throughout her dorm room as she got ready for Nathan to come over. She was excited to finally have some alone time with him because although they had been finding time to hang out it had mostly been in public. And she'd be lying if she said she didn't miss their heated make out sessions. The boy could kiss, and she loved being the one that he wanted to kiss. All her homework had been completed, she had made sure Brooke was out for the night, and her outfit consisted of a pair of tight skinny jeans and a red tank top. After all, they were just hanging out in her dorm room. There was no need to go overboard. Once she had all the candles lit, she set the lighter down on her desk and took a seat on her bed. She took a quick survey of the room and smiled to herself. It was almost six, so Nathan would be there any minute.

Ten minutes later, she heard a knock on the door and furrowed her brow as she stood up to get it. Nathan usually just walked right in, so it couldn't be him. She made it to the door quickly and opened it, crossing her arms over her chest when she saw who it was. "Um, what are you doing here, Grant? And how do you know what dorm I'm in?"

Grant flashed her a charming smile and shrugged his shoulders. "I'm just good, I guess. I'm here because I wanted to see you. I thought we could hang out."

"Why would we hang out?" Haley asked, confused. "You know I'm with Nathan."

His face faltered as he let out a scoff. "Yeah, I know. But does that mean you can't hang out with any other guys? Short leash, Hales."

She raised an eyebrow at him. "I can hang out with whoever I want to. And with that said, goodbye." She started to shut the door, but he stopped it with his hands.

"Haley, please," Grant pled. "I've walked you to class like three times now. That's got to count for something, right? You obviously don't hate me."

"You're right; I don't hate you. But right now, I'm waiting for my boyfriend so you need to go," Haley replied. "Because I seriously doubt he would be pleased to see you here."

Grant sighed and shoved his hands into his pockets. "Fine, I'll go. But I'll be seeing you, Haley James." He gave her a wink and then turned on his heel.

Haley scoffed and shut the door behind him. Although she had given him the benefit of the doubt at first, his demeanor was really starting to weigh on her nerves. He hit on her every time he walked her to class, and most of the time she just let it go. She wasn't interested in him in that way at all, and she didn't want to be with anyone but Nathan. The fact that he couldn't comprehend that was a little ridiculous. Making her way back to her bed, Haley sat down and turned her iPod on after placing the ear buds in her ears.

7:15… Haley dialed Nathan's number and waited for him to pick up, but it went straight to voicemail. "Babe, where are you? I'm starting to get a little worried here. You were supposed to be here over an hour ago. Call me when you get this, okay?"

8:30… Now she was really started to get scared. Nathan had never blown her off before; why would he be doing it now? She'd called his phone multiple times, but it went straight to voicemail every time, without fail. What if something was wrong?

10:00… It had been four hours since he was supposed to be at her dorm room. Where the hell was he? After she tried his phone again, she decided to try Lucas's. Maybe he knew where his brother was.

"Hello?"

"Luke, hey," Haley greeted him. Deciding to cut right to the chase, she asked, "Do you know where Nathan is?"

"Um, no. I'm with Brooke right now," Lucas replied. "Why? What's up?"

Haley sighed into the receiver. "He…we were supposed to hang out tonight, and he was supposed to come over here at like six, but he never showed up. And he won't answer his phone. It keeps going straight to voicemail. I'm really getting scared, Luke."

"Hales, calm down," he replied. "I'll try to find him. I'm sure it's nothing major, okay? Just be patient. I'll call you back, okay?"

Haley nodded and whispered a reply before hanging up the phone.

11:30… Lucas had called back saying he had no idea where his brother was. He had succeeded in calming Haley down though, telling her he was probably just out studying late, which he knew was a lie. Nathan didn't study, especially not for hours on end.

She had finally fallen asleep but was jolted out of her slumber when she felt a large hand roughly shaking her. "Nathan?" she questioned, squinting up at her boyfriend.

Nathan smiled lazily and crawled on top of her in the bed. "Hi, babe," he mumbled before covering her lips with his own.

Haley kissed him back for a moment before pushing his head away. "Have you been drinking?" He both smelled and tasted of hard liquor.

Nathan brought his hand up in front of her face and held his index finger and thumb apart just slightly. "Just a little, baby," he said, slurring his words. "Do you want some? I could go get you some."

"No, thank you," she mumbled. "Where have you been? I was worried about you."

He shrugged his shoulders and put his lips to her neck. "I was at the bar, but I'm not there anymore."

Haley tried to resist the intense pleasure his lips were evoking, but after only seconds she gave into it and let a long moan out.

"You like that?" Nathan whispered, sucking on her neck again.

"Mhmm," she mumbled, placing her hands in his hair to hold him to her.

Nathan smiled against her skin as he let his hands roam up and down her sides. He found the hem of her tank top and pushed it up slightly so he could caress her bare stomach. "You're really sexy," he muttered. "Can we do it now?"

She furrowed her brow. "Do what?"

"Fuck," he stated bluntly.

Haley pushed his head away from her neck. "What the hell are you talking about? No."

"Please," he whispered, rubbing his lower body into hers. "I'm really hard for you."

"Nathan, I'm not having sex with you tonight," she stated in a stronger voice. "Quit it."

He moved his mouth to hers and kissed her hard as his hand trailed its way down her body again. He found her jeans and made quick work of undoing the button and lowering the zipper. He tried to push them down but felt Haley's hand grab his wrist. "What?" he questioned.

"I said we're not doing that," she told him, releasing her grip on his wrist.

Giving her a small smirk, he moved his hand to her jeans again, this time slipping his hand inside them. "Come on, baby," he mumbled. "You know it'll feel good."

"Nathan!" she yelled, pushing his hand away again. She quickly slid out from beneath him and stood up, buttoning her jeans again. "You need to go."

Letting out a heavy sigh, Nathan stood up from the bed and made his way over to her. "Come on. We can just go to bed. It's fine."

"No, it's not," she whispered, shaking her head as a few tears fell from her eyes. "Just…you need to go."

"I'm not leaving you here with him," Nathan responded, sitting on the bed.

She wanted to ask him what he was talking about, but she really didn't have the energy at the moment. So she stayed silent and watched as he slowly lay back on her bed and passed out. She wiped her eyes and then took a seat on the edge of Brooke's bed, watching him for a long time before she decided to go to sleep.

Haley watched him as she sat on the edge of her bed. It was almost six in the morning, but she had found it difficult to sleep. Instead she watched him most of the night. She knew she couldn't blame him for what had happened the night before; he had been drunk. But still, she just didn't know if she could be in a relationship with someone as unpredictable as Nathan. It was scary. She ran a hand through his dark hair and watched as he slowly opened his eyes and squinted up at her.

"Hales? What time is it?" Nathan grumbled sleepily.

She shrugged her shoulders and moved her hand down to his cheek. "Almost six."

"Is…is everything okay?" he asked, sitting up against the headboard.

"No," she whispered with a short shake of her head. Spending the night watching Nathan sleep had given her a lot of time to think about their relationship and what each of them wanted out of it.

Nathan immediately grew concerned and placed a hand on her knee. "What is it?"

She took a deep breath and placed her hands in her lap. "Nathan, I really like you."

He smiled softly. "I really like you, too."

She fixed her eyes on her hands and breathed in deeply again. "I'm sorry. I just…I've been thinking a lot about it, and I think that maybe we shouldn't do this. I…I think that we want different things, and it's not fair of me to try and keep you from doing the things that you want to be doing. You are who you are, and I knew that when I met you. It's why I was so hesitant at first."

"Hales-"

"Please let me finish," she interrupted him. "Nathan, I've been through a lot in my life, and I know it's my fault that you don't know everything. But…despite all of that, I'm willing to give you my heart. But that's all I can give you." She took his hand from her knee and placed it over her heart. "And if that's not enough for you, then maybe I'm not enough for you." She struggled to blink away the tears that threatened to fall.

Nathan shook his head and leaned forward so his forehead was against hers. "Haley, that is enough for me."

She shook her head. "It wasn't last night," she whispered.

"Last night? What do you mean, last night?" He furrowed his brow, and when he looked into her eyes he remembered it all. "Shit," he muttered. "Haley, I was drunk. I wasn't myself."

She shrugged and looked down. "Maybe you were, and maybe who you are right now isn't yourself. How can you be sure?"

"I just am," he insisted, caressing her cheek. "That wasn't me, and it never has been, Haley. And I…God, I'm so sorry for making you doubt me. Please just give me another chance."

"Nathan, last night can't happen again," she whispered.

"It won't," he promised quickly.

She closed her eyes briefly and brought a hand up to cling to his shirt. "I need to tell you about what happened to me. I feel like it's holding us back, and I really want to move forward with you." She watched him nod his head. "But first, I need you to tell me why you were drinking last night. You just blew me off, Nathan. I waited for five hours."

He sighed. "I know. I'm sorry. I…I came over here, and I saw you talking to Grant. It freaked me out."

"So you decided to go get drunk?" she asked incredulously.

"I'm not proud of it, okay? It was a stupid thing to do. I'm sorry," he repeated.

Haley sighed. "Well, if you would have heard our conversation I think you would have stayed."

"Why?"

"Because he asked me to hang out with him, and all I said back was that I have a boyfriend and I'm not interested in him. And that's the truth," she stated. "So next time, please just talk to me before you jump to conclusions. I would never lie to you."

He nodded. "I know. I promise."

Haley moved up onto the bed and sat in front of him with her legs crossed. She placed her hands on her knees and took a deep, calming breath. She knew it would take a lot out of her to talk about this. She never did. Peyton and Brooke didn't even know about it, and they were her best friends. Somehow, though, Nathan made her want to be honest, and she knew it was unfair to tell him there was something without letting him know what that something was. "Okay," she said shakily.

Nathan sat up more and crossed his legs as well, scooting closer so that their knees were touching. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to, Hales," he said softly.

"I know," she said with a small nod. "I want to. I…I need to."

"Okay," he answered simply.

Haley licked her lips and took another deep breath. "Okay, so…it was two years ago. You know how I told you I'm not a virgin?"

He nodded.

"Well, I was dating this guy. It was right after the school year had ended, and there was this big party to celebrate the beginning of summer, and we went together. Even though I'd been going here for a while, I'd never really gone to any big parties because they just weren't my thing. They still aren't." She drew in a shaky breath. "Anyways, we um…we got there, and we were both drinking a little. We danced and mingled and stuff, but then he…he started getting weird. He started drinking more and more, and it was clear that he was drunk. And a little while into the party, he said he was ready to leave, so I asked him where he wanted to go. He brought me outside and down the beach because apparently his parents' beach house was close to where the party was. And…I mean, we'd been dating for a few months, but…I…I shouldn't have gone with him."

Nathan did not like what he was hearing or the direction this story was headed. Haley was crying, which he hated to see, and he reached out to take her hands in his. He gave them both a reassuring squeeze but didn't say anything. He could already feel the anger boiling up inside of him, but a small part of him was clinging to the hope that she wasn't going to say what it sounded like she was.

Haley gave him a small smile as she held his hands. "So we went to his parents' beach house, and he kept drinking. And we were just kind of hanging out, and then we decided to go for a swim. So we both went out onto the beach, but we never got in the water. Instead we just got down in the sand and kind of started making out a little. But it was nothing bad. I mean, no clothes came off or anything. And then he just all of a sudden started getting really grabby. And he kept trying to take my clothes off, but I kept stopping him. For a while, he was fine, and we just kept making out. But then…then he started again, and I just…I couldn't stop him."

"Please tell me he didn't," Nathan whispered, resting his forehead against hers. God, how could anyone hurt her like that? She was such a beautiful person, and she deserved the best. How could anyone not see that? He let go of one of her hands and brought his to the side of him, clenching his fist tightly. She hadn't even finished the story yet, but he had literally never felt so much anger inside himself at once.

Biting her lip, she nodded her head slowly. "I…I screamed, but no one heard me. He was really, really strong. I kept trying, but he just wouldn't stop. So he, um…he took all my clothes off, and he…he raped me," she finished in a whisper.

Nathan wrapped his arms around her tightly. Although he was feeling a ton of anger at the moment, the urge to comfort his girl was stronger. He couldn't believe she had gone through something so traumatic. "Jesus, baby…I'm so sorry," he whispered into her hair.

Haley clung to him as she cried into his t-shirt, but after a few more seconds she pulled away. "That's…that's not all, Nathan."

"What do you mean?" he asked lowly. How could there be more? How could she have possibly been put through more than some sadistic rape?

She bit her lip and looked down at her hands, which were now placed securely in her lap again. "After it happened, he just got up and left. And I laid there for…I don't even know how long. But then I…I got up and got dressed and left. But I knew that no matter what, no one could find out. I felt embarrassed and stupid for not realizing what kind of a guy he was, you know?"

"But your parents…" Nathan interjected. Her entire family seemed to know about it, after all.

She nodded. "Yeah, I um…like I said, I didn't plan for anyone to find out. But then…after I had been home for about a month, I started feeling really weird. All of a sudden, I was really tired all the time, and I felt sick. So I went to the doctor, and-"

Nathan cut her off. "Oh, my God," he muttered with a shake of his head. "You…you got pregnant, didn't you?"

"Yes," she croaked out through the tears that were streaming endlessly down her face. "I told my parents I was pregnant, and they freaked out. They seemed so disappointed in me, and I just…I didn't want that. So I told them the truth about what happened. Then all my siblings found out and all my friends from home. You should have seen the way they all looked at me, Nathan." She shook her head. "Like they all felt so sorry for me, but they just wouldn't stop staring."

Nathan took her hands in his again and brought one up to his lips to place a kiss on her fingers. "What happened, Hales?" he urged her.

"I…I lost the baby," she whispered so quietly he almost didn't hear her. She shook her head and tore her hands away from his, using them to wipe the tears from her face. "I was fourteen weeks, and then I just…I lost the baby. They said my body wasn't strong enough to carry a child. And I know it probably doesn't make any sense, but I was heartbroken. I…I still am. Even though it was a product of that horrible night, it was my child, you know?" Haley absentmindedly brought a hand over her stomach. "And it felt like I lost a part of me." She sniffled, trying to compose herself even if only slightly. "So I came back to school and went on with my life. No one here knew about it, and they still don't."

"What about Brooke? And Peyton?" Nathan questioned.

She shook her head. "No, you're…you're the first person I've intentionally told about any of it. My parents tried to get me to see someone, but I can't do that. I won't do that."

"God, baby," Nathan breathed, pulling her in close. "Come here."

After he'd leaned against the headboard again and stretched his legs out in front of him, Haley climbed into his lap and buried her face in his neck. She felt his arms encircle her and found herself feeling vulnerable and extremely safe at the same time.

"I am so sorry you had to go through that," he whispered into her ear as he held her. "I wish I would have known you then. I wish I could have been there for you."

She nodded and whispered, "Me, too." Then she pulled her face from his neck and brought her lips to his for a gentle kiss. "But you're here now."

He continued to hold her, whispering soothing words into her ear every few seconds. He knew it wouldn't take any of the pain of the past away, but it's all he could think to do. There were so many contrasting emotions swirling around inside him, and he didn't know which one should be dominant. They were all scary.

After another few minutes, Nathan pulled back to look into her eyes. "Fuck," he mumbled. "Last night, I…God, I'm so sorry. I must've made you feel like-"

Haley cut him off by pressing her lips against his. "It's okay," she told him once she'd pulled away. "Yes, it scared me. But only because I know that you're better than that. And I…I really am sorry that I'm not ready to give you that part of me yet. I will be one day."

"Don't worry about it," he whispered. "And Hales, what you said at your sister's house…that's not true. You are a virgin."

"Nathan, I'm not."

"Yes, you are," he persisted. "I don't care what science or anyone else has to say. What you experienced was not sex."

She sighed quietly and nodded her head. She knew he was right, and in a way she had always known it. It was admitting it that was the hard part. "Well, in that case…even though I'm not ready right now, I want you to know that I can honestly see myself going there with you, Nathan. We haven't even been together for a month, but I already trust you so much. And I know that I want you to be my first."

Nathan's heart swelled at her words, and he placed a long, soft kiss on her lips. "That means so much to me, Hales. And I…thank you for sharing this with me. I can't imagine how hard that must've been for you to do."

Nodding her head, she rested it against his shoulder as he held her. "It was. But I wouldn't feel comfortable sharing it with anyone else." She began tracing small patterns across his chest as she continued to speak. "You make me brave."

Nathan kissed the top of her head and held her closer to him. "You're amazing, Haley," he said softly. "You shouldn't ever think less of yourself. And what happened to you wasn't your fault. You know that, right?"

She nodded again. "In my heart, I know that. But sometimes I can't help but feel differently. I know it's wrong, and I'm working on it. You're helping me get there though."

"Good," he responded. "You look tired, baby. Get some sleep."

"Will you be here when I wake up?" she asked quietly.

Kissing her again, Nathan nodded. "Of course I will. I could hold you forever."

Haley closed her eyes as her body molded into his. "Me, too," she whispered as she drifted off to sleep.