CHAPTER 5

"Naya?" Heather whispered into Nayas ear.

Her breath hitting a spot right under her ear and she choked the urge to shiver.

Again Naya chose to not say anything but showed that she was awake, by lightly covering heathers hand on her hips with one of her own.

"I can't imagine my life without you."

Naya was in lack of responses to this. She again moved her arm reached behind her own head and laid her hand onto Heathers cheek.

She felt Heather drawing in a giant breath as if she was trying to breathe her in and without really understanding why, she felt a small single tear leaving her eye, running down her cheek and hitting the bed sheet right beneath her face.

Heathers own hand now left its place on her hip and caught her hand on the blonde's cheek. She linked their hands and Naya guided both of their arms down to her stomach.

Heather first kissed the spot right behind her ear than her neck and finally left a small peck on her shoulder before she finally not without keeping her lips against Nayas skin for a few second lay her head back down on her pillow.

And both of them finally drifted to sleep, unaware, that later in her life Naya was gonna point out this exact moment as the moment that would make her in a future that both of them were oblivious to, eventually realize what she had been missing most of her life.

After what seemed like only seconds of sleep Naya woke up. The light of the moon still shining through her window told her, that it couldn't have been more than two hours of sleep.

She turned away from the window to find a more comfortable position and was pleasantly surprised when she found a sleeping girl lying next to her, facing her with closed eyes and a peaceful expression on her face. Their faces were only inches apart and the blonde girls freckles were sparkling in the moonlight.

When a streak of Heathers hair fell into her face Naya started moving her arm to pull it out of her face, only to stop in midair for a second of insecurity. Finally she decided to do it anyways and with the lightest touch Naya removed the hair from heathers face and pulled it back behind her ear. Afterwards without thinking about without even knowing why, Naya lay her hand on Heathers cheek. It was a simple touch but once again Naya felt like it was the only right thing to do, it was the only natural action her body seemed to be able to in this second. It was like she felt the need to make sure that the girl next to her was not just a product of her drunk imagination, that it was real, that this was real.

The second she touched Heathers face Heathers eyes sprung open and she stared into Nayas eyes. Naya wanted to pull away, taken by surprise by the fact that her best friend was awake and aware of what she was doing. But before she fully could pull away one simple word left Heathers lips.

"Don't."

Naya understood and kept her hand on the spot, caressing Heathers cheek with her thumb.

Heathers eyes closed again immediately and her breathing slowed down again. She had fallen asleep again.

"Why can't things always be this simple?" Naya whispered more to herself than to anyone else.

But deep down beneath her drunken exhausted mind she knew the answer.

This wasn't reality. Of course it was, in this exact moment, this was the only reality. In this moment, covered by alcohol and darkness, she and Heather were the only two people in this beautiful universe they had built just for the two of them. But tomorrow, everything was gonna be as if these few little beautiful moments that felt more real to Naya than anything else she had ever experienced or felt were gonna fade back into the dark invisible parts of their minds that were reserved only for the two of them. Or maybe only for me Naya thought.

She didn't even know what all of this was about, she was searching for an answer without knowing the actual question. The only thing she knew was that she was confused beyond her own understanding. And that every day, every single second outside of her and Heathers small privat universe felt wrong and twisted for some reason. As if she was following the wrong directions, as if she wasn't living her own life anymore, as if she was living a copy of her own life, a black and white version. And somehow it was Heathers fault. Somehow, all of her thoughts just as much as every single question and every single answer sooner or later led to Heather. Her best friend, her soul mate. She felt like she had given up some of her own individuality and independence, just to become one person with the beautiful blond dancer. And now she was only half the person she was supposed to be. She was an actress, starring in her own life every single day, without actually living it.

It couldn't be healthy, being so close to your best friend. Melting to one with someone else.

This has to stop… Naya thought with the last energy while her eyes fell shut slowly. Somehow… I have to stop it… I have to find a way out of this mess… soon… and she drifted to sleep.