Chapter 6

She woke up but didn't open her eyes. She didn't want to move or do anything. She laid there for a few minutes before deciding to get a shower. She got up and got her towel and then went to the bathroom. When she opened her door, she found a note on the other side of her door from her mother telling her that she would be home early and saying Happy Birthday. She threw the note in the trash can and went into her bathroom. She turned the water on and then went over to the mirror. She looked at her reflection and then started to cry.

"Why?" she whimpered. She then took off her clothes and her watch and got into the shower. She hoped that the hot water would wash away her pain, but it didn't. She looked down at her wrists and saw the scars glaring back at her. It felt like so long ago that she was being rushed to the hospital with the blood draining from her wrists

It was a week to the day that it had happened, and she just couldn't take it anymore, all the whispering and crying. She couldn't handle it anymore, so she went into the bathroom and got a razorblade and slit her wrists. She had accidentally cut too deep and instantly screamed.

Her mom came running into the bathroom and then she screamed "Oh my god! Frank, call an ambulance! Hold on Jordyn, please, baby, hold on."

"I'm so sorry mom, I just can't do it. I can't handle the whispering and the crying. I can't stand the way people look at me. I don't need or want their pity. I didn't want to do it mom, but I couldn't handle it anymore. I had to end it and I didn't know any other way to do it. I'm so sorry!" she started to see stars and she could feel the darkness starting to come, but she wouldn't let it take her.

The ambulance arrived and then put her on the stretcher. They kept talking to her, but she couldn't hear what they were saying. When they reached the hospital, she heard there voices but couldn't make out what they were saying, and then she blacked out. She woke up in a white room and she could hear a faint beeping sound.

She slowly looked around the room and saw her mother sitting by her bed. "Mom" she said weakly.

Her mom turned to her and smiled weakly and then leaned forward to grasp her hand. "Hey sweetie, how are you feeling?"

"I'm okay I guess." Her mom starting crying and she went to reach her hand out to stop her but realized she was being restrained.

"Mom, why do I have these on?" she asked.

"They said its standard procedure for people with self-inflicted wounds."

"But I promise I won't do it again. I promise." She said crying.

"I know sweetheart, but they have to do this. It's for your own safety." Her mother said.

She kept crying and then said "I'm sorry, mom. I just can't do it without her. I need her." She stopped to catch her breath "Mom, I miss her so much. Why did she have to die? Why did she leave me? She promised she wouldn't leave me but she did. Why mom? Why?!?!" she was hysterical.

Her mom was now crying too "She didn't want to leave, but she couldn't control that."

"But it's all my fault, I should have stopped her. I didn't want her to go. I told her to stay home but she didn't listen. I should have stopped her. I should have went and brought her back."

"No, baby, you couldn't have done anything. It's not your fault." There was silence in the room as she hiccupped from the constant crying.

"I miss her."

"I know sweetie, I miss her too."

She was brought from her thoughts the doorbell rang. She heard it magically magnified over the water. She got up and shut the water off. She hadn't really gotten a shower, more like washed her hair. She put on a robe and dragged her feet down the stairs. She got to the door and opened it.

"Hey" he said. She looked up into his blue eyes and then looked down to the floor.

"I'm sorry Draco, but I'm not really in the mood for company today."

His face fell "But it's your birthday, I'm sure you want someone to talk to" he tried.

She felt the tears behind her eyes "Look, I'm sorry, I just don't want company today. I'll talk to you later" and then she shut the door in his face and ran upstairs and collapsed on her bed in a fresh wave of tears. She felt horrible for treating him that way, but she didn't want him to see her today, not in the state she was in. She cried until she fell asleep.

"Where are you going?" she asked the girl who was rummaging through their closet.

"If you must know, I'm going to a party at Steve's house tonight." The girl said.

"But it's a school night, mom and dad won't let you go." She replied.

"I know, but I'm not going to ask mom and dad. I'm going to sneak out." The girl said laughing

"But what if you get in trouble. What if something happens?" she said

"Don't you worry Jordie, I will be home before mom and dad's midnight check-up" the girl said.

"Promise me you won't drink tonight" she said pleadingly.

The girl rolled her eyes "I can't do that, you know me."

"Please" she begged.

The girl stopped digging through the closet "What is wrong with you today?"

"I'm just worried. Now I know that I can't stop you from going to the party, but it would make me feel a lot better if you didn't drink."

The girl walked over to her and put her hand on her shoulder "You have got to stop worrying or you're going to have a stroke"

"Don't change the subject. Promise me you won't drink tonight."

The girl threw her hands up in the air "Alright, fine I won't drink tonight."

She smiled at the girl "Thank you. Now which shirt are you looking for?"

"The one that makes my eyes greener" the girl said.

"It's in the very back row" she said smiling.

"Thanks" the girl said.

She sat down on her bed and started to read her book. The girl came out of their bathroom "How do I look?"

"You look nice" she said.

"Thanks"

"When are you leaving?" she asked.

"In five minutes. I'm gonna go meet Erica down in the driveway." The girl walked over to her and hugged her tightly "I'll be home at eleven thirty. I promise I won't drink."

"Okay. Have fun." She said and then watched as the girl went out the window and disappeared into the night.

After an hour of reading, she got bored and went into the piano room. She shut the door behind and placed a Silencing charm on the door as to not disturb her parents. She was halfway through her favorite song, "Elsewhere" by Bethany Joy Lenz, when her mom walked in. She looked up from the piano and saw that her mom was crying.

She stopped playing "What's wrong?"

"There was an accident, we have to go to the hospital." Her mother said.

She and her mother left the room and got into the car. When they reached the hospital she ran into the emergency room to find her. She found her in a bed and she was bleeding heavily.

"I didn't drink Jordie. I listened to you and I didn't drink."

Jordyn nodded her head "I believe you. What happened?"

The girl swallowed hard and winced in pain "I got bored and wanted to leave, so I asked Erica to take me home. She said she didn't want to leave, so she got Francis to drive me home. I figured it would be alright since he drank the least out of all of us. When we were two blocks from the party, he went through a red light and the truck crashed right into my side of the car." The girl's breathing began to get shallow.

"Come on, you have to hold on. You can't leave me."

"I won't leave you. I promise" the girl said.

Her mom came in and pulled her away from the girl's bedside "They have to take her in for surgery now, to stop the internal bleeding."

She nodded "Please hold on. Please come back to me" she said to the girl.

The girl smiled and nodded "I won't leave you Jordie. I'll never leave you."

"You better not" she said and they wheeled her away. They sat there for what felt like hours until finally the doctor came out and stood in front of them.

"Where is she? Is she okay?" she said frantically looking around.

"I'm sorry. We couldn't stop the bleeding" the doctor said.

"What? What are you talking about? You have to stop the bleeding! You should be back there trying to fix her! Go fix her!" she screamed.

"There's nothing we can do. I'm sorry" the doctor replied.

"No, she promised me she wouldn't leave me! She promised me she would come back! She's not dead, she can't be dead!" she cried.

Her mother grabbed her and pulled her into a hug "She's gone sweetheart"

"No! She's not gone! How can you just give up on her like that?" she screamed at her mother.

She ran towards the operating room where they took the girl and she ran into the room and saw them pulling the sheet over her head. She went over to her lifeless form and pulled the sheet back to reveal her face.

"Wake up! It's not funny anymore. Wake up! You can't be dead! You promised me you wouldn't leave me! I need you! You can't do this to me!" she paused to catch her breath.

"How could you do this to me Jackie? I told you not to go to that party and you didn't listen! You were supposed to come back to me Jackie! You were supposed to come back!" she screamed at the lifeless girl beneath her.

She reached out and brushed a lock of hair out of her face that had fallen when they pulled the sheet up. "I can't do this without you. I need you!" she cried.

She bent over and hugged the lifeless body of her twin sister one last time "I love you Jackie."

She looked up at the clock on the wall. It was one o clock in the morning. That meant only one thing. Jackie had died on their birthday. She stopped breathing as the thought of having no more birthdays with her twin by her side struck her. They were fifteen today, but her sister wouldn't get to see sixteen. She cried over her twin's body until her mother came in and took her away. She cried during the funeral and then for two days after that. When she went back to school everyone was giving her pity stares and whispering about how her twin had died. She couldn't stand it and she was going to put an end to it.

She woke up crying. "Happy Birthday Jackie" she said quietly to her reflection.