Well Christmas was awsome once more and Santa was cool he gave alot of stuff! I love you Santa! You rock! Hope Santa was as good to you as he was to me. Sorry for the wait of the chapter I'm getting caught up in other stories aswell. I'm writing my ass off literally! lol I wish I was a twin then the chapters could be written faster but I'd still be the cool one:)

Chapter 6

Welcome To the Family and Reasoning

Amaya was having a bit of a hard time wrapping her head around this one. Big giant coffee bitch weasel ogre was her close family?

Amaya: Yah ooookay. So Now that we are family how about some coffee?

Jade: Huh? So like this is fucked up the ass to hell!

Tasia: OMG see Ibiki I told you you were related to her! This is so exciting like finding out your pregnant!

Jade: Huh?

Tasia: You know it's so exciting but scary as hell all at the same time!!

Amaya: Right now I really wish I was pregnant.

Jade: It's not so bad you could be related to sick looking boy behind me. You'd look sick all the time though so it wouldn't that good huh sick boy?

Tasia: Yah he does look like he has the flu or something. Are you sick sick boy?

They all looked at Hayate. Ibiki nodded which meant he could respond.

Hayate: I'm not sick.

Tasia:Then you have allergies don't you? You know what the best thing for allergies is? Tea green tea it always help me out in the springtime. oh and guess what my favorite thing to do in the spring time is? Well it's kinda odd so you'll have a hard time guessing so I mind as well just go ahead and tell you anyways. It's not really something that really deals with spring but it's pretty close to it. Yah okay not really close now that I've thought about it. but I do do it in the spring! I love to go fishing! And..

Jade: This is all your fault you do realize that don't you bitch weasel?

Amaya: Hey I don't want to be related to a bitch weasel just call him coffee bitch?

Tasia:Why is that?

Amaya: Because when he tells people his name they'd be like Coffee Bitch? And then he can say yes please!

They all laughed well just the girls anyways.

Ibiki:Is this going to go on forever or can we just wrap things up?

Jade: Why you got a hot date with local bicycle?

Tasia:Bicycle? Why a bicycle?

Amaya:(laughing) Because she let's everyone ride!

Tasia: I just had to go and ask didn't I. That's not very nice you know she probably just has low self esteem or something mentally wrong with her. Who are we to judge who he decides to go out with? Maybe he likes easy chicks who don't say no! It's kinda low. Ibiki you can do better then that. leave the poor girl alone!

Jade:(laughing) Yah just leave the bicycle alone. What has the bicycle ever done to you?

Amaya: Jade quit putting thoughts in her head again! Now she'll think that Coffee Bitch goes around chasing free whores! Hey sick boy do you like free whores too?

Hayate:No

Amaya:So you like the ones that cost money? Well it's your dime I guess.

Hayate: I don't like whores altogether.

Jade: That's fucking evil of you sick boy! Most of the time it's not their fault they have no choice.

Tasia: Yah sick boy maybe the whores don't like you either did you ever think of that? Maybe you just need to meet one then you'll see that their actually nice girls. We should go look for one and bring her to you so you can meet her!

Ibiki had trouble holding down a small smile on his usually stern face. These girls are driving him to the brink of insanity.

Hayate: I prefer you didn't.

Jade:Oh come on sick boy don't be such baby!

Hayate: My name is Hayate not sick boy.

Amaya: Sick boy nobody told you to speak your mind. What is up with your friend there?

Jade: Tight wad is just hanging out aren't you tight wad?

Gage: My name is Gage not tight wad.

Amaya: Tight wad chill. So like what is your job here anyways? To look intimidating or just plain retarded? Because your doing a bad job on the first one.

Tasia:They don't look retarded maybe their just a little bit on the special side. I like special people you know. Their so childlike and are very easily entertained! And they really enjoy your company! So do you guys enjoy our company?

Gage:No!

Tasia: Wow tight wad is cranky today. You know what you should do after this is over go and have a nice bubble bath and drink a nice hot cup of green tea. You too sick boy. You need a little more green tea than him though. Ibiki do you like green tea?

Ibiki:Yes I do like green tea so can we start again on the questioning or do you want to wait until later?

Tasia: Why are you not feeling good you know you look a little bit flushed maybe your coming down with something. Maybe sick boy gave his sick boy sickness to you.

Hayate:I'm not sick.

Amaya: But your face says you do or do you always look that way?

Hayate:...

Amaya:Oh sorry you always look like that? Your right Jade I'm glad I'm not related to him!

Tasia: Aawww But look at him he looks so cute! It just makes you want to make him a nice bowl of chicken noodle soup to make him feel better. Don't worry sick boy I wouldn't mind being related to you you too tight wad!

Ibiki: (mumbles) Their all fucking crazy!

Amaya: I heard that coffee bitch brother! Take it back! We are not crazy you are! Your the shit bags that are keeping us here! Even though we are related you aren't giving me coffee and that is what family is supposed to do is give family coffee!

Jade: So you think we're crazy huh Coffee bitch? So do you have any idea how fucking crazy you jerkoffs are?

Tasia: We maybe crazy but your crazier!

Amaya:Some fucking family you turned out to be I really wish I was pregnant it would be a whole lot easier!

Jade: Okay so lets go get you knocked up! Hey tight wad do you know of any bars we could go crash so she can get laid?

Tasia: I want to come too! I love babies their so cute and small just like people!

Ibiki: No one is going anywhere! No bars! No pregnancies!

Amaya:Hey just because your not getting laid doesn't mean I can't! So tight wad and sick boy you want to come get laid? Oh and sick boy I promise if i see a whore I chase her down the street so you don't have to deal with her!

Ibiki:No one is going anywhere!

Amaya: Chill big brother we were only joking!

Ibiki looked at her with a death glare. He leaned back and rubbed his head band and eyes.

Ibiki:So far we have gotten no where! We are just right back to where we started! Do you want to finish this now or do you want to wait until later! Because right now this is pointless!

Tasia: I'm getting hungry can you get me some food?

Ibiki:No! Any other requests?!

Amaya: Coffee?

Ibiki:NO!

Jade: Sex?

Ibiki: Huh?... No!

Jade: Made you think about it huh?

Ibiki stood up and put his hands on the table with a thud that made all of the girls jump.

Ibiki:Now listen to me and listen carefully! I want you to answer my questions! Do not say anything else that will take you off topic! Do not even look at each other ! Do not even talk unless I ask you a question directed to you! You got that?!!

Ibiki gave them all a death glare that chilled them to the bone. He was using a chakra technique that he used on the most hardest detainees. Tight wad and sick boy were amazed that he could shut them up and keep them quiet for so long. Gage leaned over to Hayate.

Gage: He should of did this half an hour ago.

Ibiki glared for a second at him. That shut gage up pretty fast! He turned to Amaya first.

Ibiki:Amaya is everything you told me so far the truth?

Amaya nodded. All three girls looked kinda dazed like they were in a trance.

Ibiki:Tasia are you or any of your friends spies?

Tasia shook her head no.

Ibiki:Jade Do you know why you are here?

Jade shook her head no.

Ibiki:Amaya Are any of you from this land?

Amaya shook her head no

Ibiki:Any questions?

Amaya: Can I have some coffee?

Ibiki:Tasia Do you have any special fighting skills?

Tasia shook her head no.

Ibiki: Any questions?

Tasia: Why are you so mean?

Ibiki:Jade do you or you friend have any plans to harm our village?

Jade shook her head no.

Ibiki: Any questions?

Jade: Can we still go to the bar to get laid?

Ibiki: No you can't. Is what everything you've told me the truth?

They all nodded yes.

Ibiki:Good that's all I needed. You girls are good I only need to use this technique on the most strong willed.

Ibiki let them go. He stood up strait and looked down on all three girls. A small smirk on his scared lips. He had won finally! But he did have to use his special technique which was so draining on him. Now low on chakra too he sat back down.

Amaya: That was so cool coffee bitch you have to teach me that!

Ibiki looked at her stunned. In the technique they weren't supposed to remember what happened.

Amaya: And see I told you I was telling you the truth family doesn't lie to family do they? Just remember that in the future! By the way Jade you really do have to get laid! You have the libido of a male dog!

Jade shrugged her shoulders.

Jade: What just happened here and why are saying I need to get laid? Well we all know it's the truth.

Tasia: I feel dizzy. What did just happen? I think I need to go rest or something I feel tired. Maybe I just need some coffee. Hey Ibiki Can you please get me some? I'd love you forever. (she was still dazed and confused)

Jade: What's up with you Tasia you feeling alright. Do you need to lie down?

Amaya: He just asked us questions just a minute ago and we answered them don't you remember?

Jade: Huh? What are talking about what questions? Coffee Bitch did you just mind rape me?!!

Tasia: He raped our minds?!?! OMG that is so wrong! You stay out of my mind you mind raping pervert!

Amaya: Wow Ibiki you are a perv!

Tasia: This never happened to me before I don't know what to do?!

Jade: For fuck sakes! Do you and these pantie wastes ever stop? Fuck you are the worst piece of dog shit I've ever know and I've known alot of shit bag people!

Amaya: Fuck Jade calm down it wasn't that bad!

Jade: Just losing your virginity bad!

Tasia: Yah but this is getting it up the ass kinda bad! You disgust me Ibiki! Did you ever get it up the ass? I never but I hear it hurts!

Amaya: Yah Ibiki did you ever get it up the ass?

Ibiki sat back with his arms crossed and glared.

Jade: Maybe you three guys need to get together and try it huh?

Amaya:(laughing) It gives new meaning to the names coffee bitch and sick boy had tight wad!

Tasia: Huh? oh Jade you left that one open to huh?

Jade: (laughing) Yes I did it on purpose!

Ibiki: You answered all the questions I needed. So for now lunch will be served you can eat here. I'll be back later.

Amaya: Can we have some coffee now please Ibiki you promised!

Ibiki stood up gathered his papers and walked to the door.

Ibiki: Yes You can have some coffee.

Ibiki left the room and then tight wad and sick boy followed.

Jade: Hey sick boy do you want to have fuck me later? The way you pinned me down gave me some fucking pretty sexy thoughts!

he just ignored her and left the room. He turned to make sure that the door was locked. there was no way in hell he wanted any of them to ever get loose!

Gage: So sick boy you going to take her up on her offer?

Hayate: No but at least I'm not a tight wad!

Chapter 7Coffee Is Served and A Side Order Of Hayate!

Hayate just lost the bet and has to get the girls their lunch and coffee. He also has to be present in the room while they eat to make sure they don't try anything while eating. Will the girls drive him to quit his job? Find out next time!

Ibiki: Cyberspyderweb when I find you your going to be in the torture room of three days!!!!

Anko: Wow Ibiki I've never seen you this way before. And I've pissed you off may of times.

Ibiki: You have no idea what I've just been put through!

Anko :Your right I'll go easy on you today.

Ibiki: Do you even know how to go easy on anyone?

Anko: No but I can at least pretend to try right?

Ibiki: I'm going to find some Advil! Maybe some Sake while I'm at it!

Anko:Hey Ibiki since your going out can you do me a favor?

Ibiki: What is it Anko?

Anko: Can you pick me up a coffee?

Ibiki punched the wall so hard that his arm went all the way through and most of the wall came down when he pulled his arm out. He calmly walked off. Anko walked to the hole in the wall and looked at it confused. She looked in .

Gage: Hi Anko! So I see you found Ibiki! - Gage waved at her. :)

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