"Hey, do you know what's up with Liv?"

"Funny, I was going to ask you the same thing?" Elliot sighed and added "so you have no idea then?" Elliot looked at Fin hopefully.

"None at all. I guess we'll just have to wait until she decides to tell us." The look on Fins face made it clear that he thought this to be approximately never.

"You have no idea at all?" Elliot added again. He was worried about her, and even though he already knew that Fin didn't know he had to ask.

"You're the one that's close to her"

"I know, she's just…"

"She's Liv. She doesn't like talking about what bothers her." Fin filled in for Elliot in a way to make him understand he didn't blame him for not knowing what the matter with Olivia was.

"You… You don't think something happened to her in there?" Elliot voiced the fears he didn't want to give words to. It was the question that had been nagging at him that he didn't want to ask.

Fin looked up at Elliot. It wasn't the first time he had thought about that, but he, similarly didn't want to actually say it.

"I hope not."

Cragen decided he had to call Olivia. According to Melinda she already knew, and it was cowardly to expect her to handle the conversation or to send Amanda in to talk to her unprepared. This phone call was one he really didn't want to make. He had no idea what her reaction would be and didn't know if anger or sadness would be worse. He braced himself as he dialled the number.

Olivia was disturbed in her pacing by a call. She didn't pick up, fearing it was the detective that wanted to talk to her. She stood still as she heard the voicemail pick up the call.

"Liv, it's me Cragen. I need to talk to you… I know you're not happy with me but, please…"

Olivia didn't feel up for talking to one more person who knew about… everything, but her recent feeling of uselessness made har want to do something. She picked up the phone, regretting it as she did.

"I'm here"

"Oh, good." Cragen was at a loss of words when she did pick up. He quickly collected himself and continued.

"Melinda told be you know about Detective Rollins. She would like to talk to you…"

"Does this have to be a big thing? Does she have to investigate this?" Olivia knew it was futile to ask that, Cragen wanted her to press charges, hell he had flown in a detective, but some part of her hoped that it didn't have to be a big thing, that they could all just forget. Not that she thought that she would, but maybe Melinda and Cragen could. Maybe she would feel less like a victim then.

"I know it's hard but putting him in prison is the best thing to do" it felt unfair to her those words. Of course it's the best thing to do. I didn't mean that she felt she could do it.

"He is going to go to prison anyway." That was her explanation to herself. He was going to go to prison, whether she pressed charges or not. She had helped Ashley, she didn't need to do more.

"They are going to ask you how you knew… that information. Why you asked Ashley about it. They're going to get you to speak in court about it either way" Cragen spoke the words heavily, he didn't want to say it, it felt like he was blackmailing her. She cared about the victims. But he knew that they could – and would – ask her about it on the stand.

Olivia didn't say anything, processing the new information. Fuck. The only way she could avoid telling anyone about it was if she didn't testify in Ashleys case. And then he would go completely free. All of it would have been for nothing. And she would let Ashely down. Ashley who had done a rape kit and talked to her even when she felt scared and humiliated.

"I'll talk to Rollins"

Amanda had been going around New York for a while trying to enjoy the city as well as come up with a way to make Olivia speak with her when she got a call.

"Detective Rollins" Amanda answered the phone in the best professional tone she could muster. She expected it to be either someone from work in Atlanta or someone who had to do with this case. Either way the last thing she wanted was to admit how much this case was bothering her.

"Hello, it's Cragen. I set up a time when you can talk to Olivia."

"She'll talk to me?" Amanda failed to hide her surprise at the fact.

"She's agreed to…But…" Cragen was unsure of how much he should say about Olivias motivation to talk to the detective and whre it truly came from. He decided that honesty was the best policy. "She's doing it for the case more than anything?"

"For Ashley?"

"Yes" Cragen sighed deeply. He felt guilty about it all.

Amanda was surprised that Olivia had agreed to talk to her, but not why. Detective Benson had made quite the name for herself as a champion for all victims. It was something Amanda admired in her. She often did dangerous things to help her victims, and this time it had gone wrong.

"Where can I meet her?" Amanda couldn't imagine that the other detective would like to talk to her in the precinct, and no other places where obvious.

"She has agreed to talk to you in her apartment." Cragen felt guilty about this to. Yet again it was a situation Olivia didn't really like – but preferred over the alternative.

"How is she?" Amanda asked the question quietly.

"She's…" Cragen struggled with how to phrase it. How was she? She was still Olivia, she was still the woman who insisted everything was fine. She had shown up to work after… it… had happened. And now she was at home, and not insisting on getting to come in like she otherwise would. But that was because people new. People new she was a victim and if it was something that Olivia detested it was being a victim.

"She doesn't want to be a victim. She wants to help them."