AN: I know it's been way longer than usual. I could say real life happened and it did, but I also got serious writers block.

I got so much amazing feedback from everyone and I had a few conversations that made me feel like I needed to treat this with care. This chapter was very difficult to write and I'm not thrilled with it if you have any constructive criticism please please I need it.

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"You must have dropped some bomb on mom and dad," Caleb's voice is laced with laughter as he sits down across from me. I've been looking forward to dinner with Caleb all week, now I'm wishing I'd stayed home.

"Hello to you too." I mumble into my drink.

Caleb's blue eyes light up with humor and he asks the waitress for an old fashioned and another drink for me, "I have a feeling it's going to be a mostly drinks night." He says when she's stepped away. "So what happened? Dad called me Sunday as if we had never fought, telling me how proud he is that I'm on track to graduate early."

"I'm pretty sure I'm the Prior disappointment for the foreseeable future." I tell him as I drain my glass. "I may have told them that I'm dating someone and they wouldn't be meeting him anytime soon."

Caleb's eyes are wide and he swallows thickly, "how are you still alive?" He asks.

I shake my head and tell him the full story of the dinner he missed. The waitress brings our drinks and takes our orders just as I'm finished telling him about the assault on Christina. By the time we're finishing our drinks I'm up to the part of the story where I admonished my father for being so hard on Caleb and then about walking out on them.

"This is bad Bea." He's looking at me concerned, "if dad's coming to me telling me I'm not a failure he's seriously pissed at you."

I nod my agreement as we both start eating. "Mom looked like I had ripped her heart out. I feel terrible, but I don't want to live like them."

"Me either," he agrees.

"Do you think they'll ever forgive me?" I ask him.

"I could fail my next exam, that might swing things back in your direction." He suggests with a smile.

We eat for a bit in comfortable silence before Caleb's curious nature gets the better of him. I knew this was coming and I'm actually surprised he held it in so long, "so who's the guy?"

I feel my cheeks heat up and I can't keep the smile off my face. I tell him about Eric but leave out his involvement in ridding me of my fears.

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"Look who the cat dragged in!" Christina screeches when Caleb walks through the door. She jumps up to hug him tightly and he lifts her off the floor.

"Good to see you Chris. Will." He turns to Will and shakes his hand.

Christina and Will keep conversation with Caleb while I duck into the kitchen to get Caleb and I each a beer. With everyone here there's no doubt this night will run long and I will require more than the three bourbons I had at dinner to survive the reminiscing that will ensue.

When I return and hand Caleb his bottle they are discussing Peter's return.

"Bea you didn't tell me Peter transferred back," Caleb said.

I shrug and sip from my own beer before I respond, "it didn't come up."

Caleb shakes his head, "I never liked that kid. He's always insulting you."

"He's just honest." I defend.

"Don't bother Caleb," Will tells him.

Christina rolls her eyes and adds, "she doesn't listen to anyone. Eric doesn't like him either but she won't hear it."

"He's my," I start to defend Peter but Caleb cuts me off.

"Oldest friend, yeah I know. Even when we were kids he did that backhanded compliment thing." He drinks from his bottle and shakes his head, "Chris, tell me about this Eric guy."

"Ahh the Abercrombie model." She smiles, "he's pretty, but he's also perfect for Tris."

Caleb looks impressed by the things Christina tells him about Eric and soon enough she's dragged out the box of pictures I keep in my closet. "I know there's one in here," she mumbles as she rifles through the pictures until she stops and looks almost sad, "I remember this day." She hands the picture to me and my face must drop too because Caleb looks over my shoulder and then pats my arm.

It's Tobias and I with his arm around my shoulders and me playfully biting him. It should be a happy memory. We spent the whole day together as a group wandering Chicago like tourists taking pictures of the landmarks and eating at tourist traps. As I think back I want to laugh at all the things we did but my memory of that day will always be tainted, it's the night Tobias left me.

"Sorry Tris." Christina offers.

I shrug it off and hand her back the picture, "it's ok. That really was a great day." I pull the picture of her and Will from the same day and hold it up. "I have more good memories than bad of that day." She smiles and so does Will. The first time Will told Chris he loved her was that day as they sat by the Ferris Wheel at The Navy Pier.

There are pictures of each of us in this box, pictures from various points in our friendships and they all elicit responses from one of us. There's me before a dance competition, one of Peter and I in high school. I reach into the box and pull out one of Al with his hair done and his thumb at his lips. He's looking directly into the camera, but really he was looking at me when I took it. Christina and Will are engrossed in the pictures of them and Caleb is texting someone. The familiar pang of anxiety hits as I remember back to that day and how I felt about him in that moment. The strange thing is the feeling doesn't last and there is no real intensity. I'm mildly upset by the thought of how I lost my friend but it doesn't create the same overwhelming fear it used to. I look into AL's photographed eyes one last time before I toss it aside and grab the next few pictures. When I see the top one is of Caleb I elbow him with a laugh and hand him the stack.

There's some of our parents and when he gets to my favorite he smiles. It's of my mother holding him when he was little. His blond head resting on her shoulder and her face in a satisfied smile, "you used to be so cute," I tease.

Before he can retaliate Christina yells, "I knew it was in here!" She's holding up a picture in triumph and Caleb plucks it from between her fingers.

I look over his shoulder and the smile that spreads across my face is instantaneous. It's Eric in a grey t-shirt and jeans leaning against the student center. His eyes squinting against the sun as he looked off towards another building. The rush of excitement I get whenever I see him hits me and I'm suddenly sad that he's not here. He knew I was having dinner with Caleb tonight and now that were all here having fun and drinking I find myself wishing he was here despite the pictures I'm sure he wouldn't want to see.

I tap Caleb on the shoulder and when he turns to look at me I ask, "how would you feel about meeting Eric before mom and dad?"

"I'd like that." He smiles and I jump up from the spot I've been occupying by the coffee table.

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"No, you don't understand," Caleb is laughing so hard at the story in his head that he can't even get it out, "she fell down the stairs so many times my parents moved her room."

Eric looks at me and I can see his body shaking with held in laughter, "if you laugh you can go home," I threaten.

"Then I will see you tomorrow because that is hysterical," he's laughing out loud now.

Christina and Will seem to be too amused by that story as well and as I look at the coffee table littered with bottles and glasses I realize that their laughter is fueled by more than just my clumsy nature.

It's been almost three hours since Eric got here and I'm stating to feel the effects of drinking and laughing all night. As the last bits of laughter wear down Caleb looks at his watch and releases a disappointed sigh, "as fun as it is, embarrassing you Bea, it's almost two AM and I have a paper to write tomorrow." He stands up and Eric and I both get up as well. "Eric it was nice to meet you," he extends his hand and Eric accepts it willingly, "we'll do this again."

"I hope so. It was nice to meet you too." Eric says.

I offer to walk Caleb out because I'm dying to hear his first impression. As we get to the door he laughs, "I don't know how you managed to find him, but I highly recommend you let him stick around." Caleb pulls me into a warm hug and kisses the top of my head, "Mom will adore him, Dad's going to hate him, we'll figure it all out. Enjoy your sleep over."

"Caleb we're not, I'm not," I start to defend.

He shakes his head and laughs, "I don't know why not. Just relax and have fun Bea, it's college. I don't ever want to hear about it though."

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Will and Christina are in the kitchen cleaning up the dishes as Eric and I straighten out the living room. He's collecting all the pictures from the table and putting them back in the box when he stops on one of Peter and I from high school. "How long ago was this?" He asks a sad tone to his voice.

I look at the picture it's us sitting on the floor of his childhood bedroom looking at each other and I'm about to touch his nose. I never realized how often we do that but I guess its kind of our little thing. I don't ever do it to Eric, and I've never seen Peter do it with his girlfriends. "Maybe mid to late senior year? That's his room at his parents. Why?"

"It seems like you two were close," it's certainly not a stretch based on that picture and the fact that Peter is one of very few men outside of my family who can touch me without inducing panic, but as we've gotten older we've grown apart.

I nod my agreement, "we were then. He got a lot more critical that year and we've been more distant since."

"Does he know what you're afraid of?" Eric asks putting the picture back in the box and piling the rest in top of it.

Just as he's asking Christina walks into the room and she answers for me, "he does, and if you ask me that's why he still acts like a dick."

"Chris, stop." I tell her. "She's got this wild theory that Peter acts like a jerk so that I will keep letting him touch me without freaking out."

Eric shakes his head as he puts the lid on the box and drops to the couch pulling me down next to him. "I think she's right."

I shake my head as I settle back into Eric's chest, "you guys are crazy. He's never looked at me as anything more than the awkward girl from high school."

Eric's arms wrap protectively around me and he pulls me closer, "that picture says something entirely different."

Later that night as we're getting ready for bed I'm sitting on the edge of my bed in sleep shorts and a tank top rubbing lotion into my legs when Eric comes in from the bathroom. He's changed into a white T-shirt and basketball shorts and I stop what I'm doing to watch him come in and close the door.

He crosses the room and picks up the lotion bottle, "lay back, let me." His eyes fall to my bare legs and I watch his tongue wet his lips as he squeezes a bit of lotion into his hands and rubs them together so it's not cold. "This stuff smells like candy, no wonder I can't keep my mouth off of you," he says as he starts to run both his hands over my right ankle, up my calf and over my knee. I lean back on my elbows and watch him as his hands splay out over my thigh sliding warm and soft over the sensitive skin. I drop my head to the side and hum in satisfaction while his strong hands massage my leg.

Eric looks up into my eyes as he dispenses more of the sweet smelling cream into his hands and repeats the actions on my left leg. This time when he finishes rubbing the lotion into my thigh he leans forward with his hands on either side of me and kisses me quickly. I can only manage a weak, "thank you," before he kisses me again this time shifting me back onto the bed.

Eric is rougher than usual as he sucks at my throat and, despite my trust in him, I feel the familiar tug of fear when his weight settles on top of me.

My body must stiffen because he's suddenly apologetic and he moves quickly back to his side of my bed.

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Eric has been acting strangely since Peter's surprise return a few weeks ago and I am starting to feel as if he doesn't believe me when I tell him there's nothing more than friendship between us. It doesn't help that Peter doesn't seem to like Eric very much.

I agreed to have coffee with Peter today hoping I could get him to come around. I'm standing in my bathroom pulling a flat iron through my hair when a Eric knocks on the door frame and leans against it arms crossed, "you do know your hair is straight already right?" He asks with a chuckle.

"You know how Peter is, I just don't feel like listening to a lecture on proper grooming," I explain.

Eric shakes his head and steps closer settling behind me with I his hands on my hips, "I know how he is. What I don't understand, is why it matters so much to you."

I comb the last section of hair into submission and turn off the appliance before turning to look at Eric, "Peter has always been honest about the way I look, he was right when he told me it was only a matter of time before you realized I'm not on your level. I'm going to do this," I gesture to my hair and make up, "as often as possible."

Eric's face tightens and I see he is jaw clench, "when did he tell you this?"

"He was asking about you over text earlier in the week, he told me I needed to 'step up my game' if I wanted to keep you interested."

Eric shakes his head and pulls me out of the bathroom and into my bedroom. There's a stern look in his eyes as he shuts the door behind us and turns towards me. "can you do me a huge favor? Stop listening to anything that kid says about you." His tone is dark and nearing aggressive. "Ever since he's been back you've retreated back into yourself. He's trying to drive a wedge between us how do you not see that?"

"Eric that's not even remotely possible," I say, "he's trying to help me keep you."

"What other advice did your wonderful friend give you?" He asks sitting down on my bed and resting back on his elbows looking at me expectantly.

I don't care to repeat what Peter said but essentially he told me if I didn't get over my fear and start satisfying Eric someone else with better fashion sense and bigger boobs would, "nothing that doesn't make total sense." Tobias had certainly found a more willing girlfriend.

"The look on your face and the color of your neck tells me it was something that has absolutely nothing to do with him," Eric bites out.

I drop onto the bed next to him and rub my hands along the legs of my jeans trying to dry the sweat, "he was right, and I've been trying really hard."

"So that's where your sudden urge to push through things has come from?" His voice is tight and angry, "you're doing things you're not ready to because this idiot told you you should?" He stands up abruptly and his hands drag through his short blonde hair. "So you'll be through the worst of your fear but you'll doubt me and my motives just enough to put distance between us. He'll get to plant the seed of doubt and you'll turn to him."

"Thats the most paranoid theory I have ever heard," I snap back.

Eric laughs without any real humor behind it, "really? Did he ever like Four? Who was there for you first after Four left?"

The answers are no, and Peter, but I still do not believe Eric's theory and I refuse to answer him. "I'm late, I will call you later."

"Tris," his tone is softer as he grabs my elbow and tugs me back to him, "don't leave like this."

I stand on my toes and kiss him quickly, "lock up when you leave, Christina's still at Will's"

The walk to the coffee shop does nothing to calm my nerves and when I sit down next to Peter he looks me up and down, "everything Ok?"

"Yeah, just a little distracted." I order a latte from the waitress and Peter's eyes are raking over me in their usual appraisal.

"You look good today Bea," he says wrapping an arm around my shoulders. "It's nice to see you taking care of yourself. So what did Dr. Banner do to get you all worked up? Did you meet the 'green guy'?"

Peter's taken to calling Eric 'Dr. Banner' just so he can make Hulk jokes about him getting angry. "Stop calling him that. We just didn't agree on something that's all, we'll figure it out."

"If you say so." Peter takes a sip of his coffee before he goes off on a tangent about the most recent girl he went out with and how she's nothing special but she'll do until the right girl comes around.

"Peter, can I ask you something?" I interrupt.

"Pretty sure you just did," he laughs.

"I'm serous," I pull my hair over my shoulder and tug my sweater sleeves over my hands.

"Uh oh, you just walled yourself off, you're going to ask me a sex question." He says leaning into me.

I cringe at his flippant mention of sex, and my fear, before I say, "no. I just, well Christina, Caleb and I were going through old pictures and one of us was mixed in."

"The one on your parents balcony? I like that one." I smile at the though of the picture he's mentioned but I need to stay focused.

"No, the one from your room, the one Drew took senior year," I remind him.

He nods and the corner of he is mouth pulls up almost involuntarily, "yeah I remember that one," he swipes at my nose with the tip of hi is fingers and suddenly, as if he realizes he's gotten too sentimental he snaps back to his closed off self, "what about it?"

"You didn't like me then did you?" I ask.

"Of course I liked you, we were best friends." His expression is confused.

I shake my head and back away from him a little, "that's not what I meant."

"Don't flatter yourself kiddo," his voice is tight, "why, are you starting to realize you had feelings for me? Because that was always obvious."

"Peter I never looked at you like that and you know it. Someone just mentioned that maybe you were looking at me a little intensely," I explain.

"Sounds like a jealous boyfriend. You failed to mention he was there for your little trip down memory lane. I told you holding out on him was going to backfire on you Beatrice. Time to suck it up and get it over with." He finishes his coffee and looks down at his watch, "I've got class. I'll text you later." He kisses my forehead quickly before pulling on his jacket and then leans in and holds onto my chin. "You've got a thing for the jealous ones and they don't like that we're close. Don't let him get between our friendship Bea." He kisses my cheek and flashes me his best toothy smile before he heads for the door.

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