Alexa's cell phone laid face up with a number already dialed into the screen. Alexa herself, holds folded neatly in front of her on the dining room table, fiddled with her thumbs while she chewed anxiously at her bottom lip. It was Bayley's number; The one she got from the Moon-Martinez wedding RSVP. Before Dakota left for work, Alexa promised to call her ex and let her know she was bringing a date.
"My new girlfriend," Alexa muttered to herself, index finger tapping rhythmically on the table. "My girlfriend, whom I love, live with and nearly had sex with several times in the last week. I figure if you can move on and get married to someone who won't ever love you why can't I date someone who very much loves me? Why am I saying all of this to an empty apartment and not my ex-fiance? Have I officially completely lost my mind? Yes, Alexa, you have."
Alexa dragged the drop-down menu on her phone to check her notifications again. She'd done it several times in the last few minutes to try and stall her phone call, but nobody was liking her photos on Instagram or sending her texts like she thought. Dakota sent an 'I love you' text a little over an hour ago; That was during her break, which means she'd be done with work soon. Alexa knew she had to suck it up and call Bayley soon or Dakota would come home, see she hasn't made the reservation yet and wonder if something was still between Bayley and Alexa.
Alexa sighed. "Fine. Fine, fine, fine! It's just one little call," sighing again, Alexa held the phone to her ear after tapping the green call button. "It'll be fine. Everything's fine."
"Hello?" It wasn't Bayley's voice. Alexa almost didn't recognize it, but she did after a heartbeat. It was Ember. Hearing that cold, emotionless voice made Alexa sick to her stomach.
"Can I talk to Bayley?" Alexa replied, biting her tongue not to spew venom into the phone. She hadn't seen Ember's face in a very long time, but Alexa could still picture the menacing look in her eyes while she played victim in the hospital after Alexa slapped her. That was the last day she got to speak to Bayley for longer than a handful of minutes before being ungracefully taken away by Ember.
"Lexi? How sweet of you to call," Ember said, her words sounding genuine but her tone clearly the opposite. "My Bayley's taking a shower. She's got a wedding coming up in a few weeks. How nice is that? And she's marrying the love of her life. Which, in case you haven't heard, is me."
Alexa clenched her fist. Her boiling anger brought the attention of Biscuit, who had jumped down from her spot on the couch and was now sniffing at Alexa's feet. "Well, that's good for you guys," Alexa spoke, trying her best to remain calm. "I just wanted to update my RSVP. I'm bringing a date now."
"Oh really? How nice. You've found another girl's life to completely crush with your incompetence and neglect. Wow, maybe she'll come running into my arms too and we can take her in like I took Bayley in," Ember hissed.
Alexa slammed her fist against the kitchen table, causing Biscuit to jump back and bark. "Look, Ember, I don't want to cause any trouble, ok? Our beef ended a long time ago-"
"No, listen here you little bitch," Ember snapped. "You don't get to ruin someone's life and expect everything to be peaches and cream because you moved on. Bayley still cries in her sleep, and do you know whose name she keeps whimpering? Not the woman who she's marrying in three weeks, but the miserable little whore that broke her heart over and over again."
Alexa swallowed hard. "You don't know what you're talking about."
"Oh, but I do, Alexa. I- Bayley!" Ember's voice suddenly changed tones, going from deep and threatening to soft and sweet in a moment's notice. "I'm just talking to Lexi. She's RSVP'ing."
"Lexi?" Bayley said over the phone.
"Hey, Bayls," Alexa whimpered, tears starting to roll down her cheeks.
"You're changing your RSVP? Did something happen?" Bayley asked.
"Yeah, I'm bringing my girlfriend, Dakota," Alexa sputtered. "Make sure to mark her down for a salad. She's vegan and doesn't eat steak."
"Are you cry-"
"See you, Bayls," Alexa hung up the phone and finally found the ability to breathe again. She inhaled sharply, then choked on her breath when she exhaled just as fast. "Fuck, it'll be ok," Alexa whispered to herself. Her face fell into her hands. "You're ok, everything's ok. Just breathe, Alexa, breathe. Everything will be ok."
The next thing Alexa knew, her hands pulled away from her eyes and she connected her gaze with the concerned yet soft stare of Dakota.
"Baby, what's wrong?" Dakota asked.
Alexa tried to talk, but her lip quivered and she started crying again. Dakota helped Alexa stand and led her, and Biscuit, to the bedroom.
Alexa told Dakota everything. Everything about Bayley, Ember, her drinking, her multiple affairs with AJ Lee, her double relapse and stint in rehab. Everything just came pouring out. With every shaky breath and tearful confession, Alexa half expected Dakota to pack her things and walk out the door never to be seen again and Alexa would find comfort in a burning bottle of something she kept locked up under the sink. Dakota never left though. She continued sitting in front of Alexa, her hands carefully holding hers, and occasionally wiping the tears away from her cheeks.
"I'm sorry," Alexa whimpered. "I'm so sorry I'm still so hung up on Bayley. I shouldn't be, because I love you more than anything, Dakota. I mean that, I swear. I want us to be together for a very long time. I just... Bayley was my world for so long, and now she's marrying that fucking bitch..."
Dakota squeezed Alexa's hands as gently as she could. "Wanna go to their house, beat the piss out of that Ember cunt?"
Alexa burst out laughing, though her tears still showed. "God, I love you so much. Yes, I want to, but Bayley would probably hate me more if I did that. Probably think we're drunk and call up the rehab place and have us hauled away."
"At least we'd have each other," Dakota pointed out.
Alexa kissed the backs of Dakota's hands. "I love you, Dakota. Honestly, I'm surprised you didn't bail when I started crying about my ex."
"Yeah, but I've mentioned mine before too. I told the group the first day of AA I wanted to get clean for my ex, but that didn't stop you from hitting on me," Dakota said.
"Um, you asked me out first," Alexa snickered. "But, and I'm sorry if this comes off bad, but I'm glad you didn't get back together with Tegan."
Dakota nodded. "Me too. I wouldn't have gotten together with you. I wouldn't have the privilege of making you breakfast. I wouldn't have met your adorable little puppy."
Biscuit was curled up beside the two lovers. Alexa giggled tearfully and scratched her beloved pup behind her ears.
"I love you," Alexa whipped the tears from her eyes for what felt like the millionth time. "So much. I want to show you how much, but I don't think I can."
Dakota smiled softly. "Well... Let me show you what you mean to me then."
Alexa felt a weight lift off her shoulders as Dakota's lips gradually met hers. A little kissing would take some of the edge off, but Alexa still felt the pain pump throughout her body like a bad hangover.
A steady hand on her chest made her lie back. Alexa picked her head up to watch in awe the spectacle of seeing the shy and introverted Dakota crawling underneath the covers and sliding Alexa's pajama pants down with her. Alexa gasped in surprise, despite seeing very clearly what Dakota was planning. Alexa stared up at the ceiling, taking the sheets around her in her fists as her heels slid further down Dakota's back.
Alexa's mind went blank. For a brief few minutes, she forgot all the trouble she had in the world. Not even her sadness stuck around. She only felt love and the feeling of being wanted. Maybe it was silly to think having sex was the best way to show someone you cared, since Alexa used it as a way to hurt people in the past. But she used it with people she cared for to show them how much she cared. Dakota thought the same way, from the looks of it.
"Dakota!" Alexa cried, feeling her body go numb before a cold tidal wave washing over her.
Dakota poked her head out from under the blankets. She placed her hands on Alexa's cheeks and planted a soft but firm kiss to her lips.
"Take it slow, huh?" Alexa joked with a breathy giggle.
Dakota leaned close to Alexa's ear. "I've done so much to show you I'm not going anywhere. This is just the cherry on top. I won't leave because of a little baggage, Alexa," Dakota's accent was soft and she carefully whispered every word with purpose and desire. "I love you too much."
Alexa felt her heart swell. "Well, let me show you-"
"No!" Dakota pushed herself away the second Alexa's hands grabbed the waistline of her shorts.
"Hey, I'm sorry," Alexa sat up, keeping herself covered with the blanket. "I didn't mean to push too far. I just thought you wanted the same in return."
Dakota shook her head. "I'm sorry. This was a mistake-"
"Hey, Dakota, it's ok. Believe me, it's ok," Alexa laced her fingers through Dakota's. Alexa sighed. "It's ok if you don't want to be touched there... I have met a lot of people who've dealt with abuse. Dating one that's suffered from it isn't new ground either."
Dakota nodded. "I appreciate your patience, Alexa. I just can't be touched unless I trust you a hundred percent. It's not that I don't trust you. I do, but not in that way."
Alexa smiled softly. "Wanna order pizza and watch a movie? We can talk while we wait."
Dakota chuckled once, letting a few tears fall from her eyes. "God, you are so perfect Alexa. I don't know where you've been all my life, but there's no way in hell I'm letting you go now."
The two girls shared a sweet kiss. Alexa, switching roles with Dakota for the moment, whipped the tears from her girlfriend's cheeks and pecked her forehead.