"Ah yes PAYDAY! Tim for junk" Koro-sensei said
"Couldn't agree more sir" Kimura said
"I forgot you have speed based powers; so your calorie intake is a lot higher than that of your classmates" Koro-sensei said
"Yeah, but there are those of us with problems about our powers, the worse one is Nagisa, we think he is faster something. He has told us in the past he's power is darkness" Kimura said
"I see, that could be a problem" Koro-sensei said
"Anyway I'll see you at clash" Kimura said becoming The Flash and racing off.
"Stop it" a girlish voice said "They're expecting me at my new school."
"So you're a teacher huh?" a thug asked
"Want to help teach us?" another one of the thugs said
"I believe you boys are in need of a lesson about treating woman" Koro-sensei said
"What?" the thugs asked.
"Lesson 1, what you're cars says about you is everything" Koro-sensei said wrapping the car in pink ribbon while adding a rose and bow
"Why pink?" the thugs freaked out
"Lesson 2...there is no second lesson" he said throwing the ribbon away "Are you okay?" he asked the woman
"Those who say chivalry is dead are wrong, thank you for your unforgettable kindness" the woman said "Do you happen to knwo where Kungigaoka Juniour high is"
"Meet the most recent addition to the Class-E staff" Karasuma said
"Nice to meet you all, I'm Irina Jelavic" Irina said bubbly
'HOME RUN, what a knock out" Sugino said
"Knockers more like it" Okajima commented
"Who else finds it weird she's into Koro-sensei" Kataoka said
"A little bit" Okano said
"She's going to be your new English and foreign language instructor" Karasuma said "No hard feelings I hope she's quite qualified
"None at all"
"She's into Koro-sensei, its kinda cute since she seems nice right?" Kaede asked
"Yeah, plus we can use this as a way to gain intel on how to kill him" Nagisa said with his notebook ready "He's thrown off by her, is it because he's not human and she is or it is because she's a woman we just need to see what colour infatuation is' Nagisa thought as their teacher became a neon pink light
'HE'S CHECKING HER OUT!' the guys all thought
"Well he likes curves which is kinda obvious" Nagisa said jotting down (weakness number 5: BOOBS!)
"What do you mean?" Kaede asked
"Nothing" Nagisa said
"Uh huh" Kaede said not believing him.
"I can't enough of you, those dark beady likes, those gelatinous arms"
"Oh my" Koro-sensei said
'Don't fall for it she's trouble!' Okano though
'Like anyone would fall for you' Nakamura thought glaring
'You're being played!' Kataoka thought
"Go on pass the ball" Koro-sensei encouraged as he played soccer with the kids.
"I thought I would need all the usual tricks" Irina said smoking "Seduction looks like it works quite well on him"
'Irina Jelavic, a master assassin; intelligent, beautiful and multilingual. No matter where they're from no one can resist her charms, while she is well guard she is the author for infiltration and approach not to mention seduction' Karasuma mentally recounted "As good as you are we can't have you dropping into this and expect the usual to work, I know your use to deep uncover assassinations, but this time you actually have to teach
"Like I'll be here long enough, I'm a professional and the octopus will be six feet under before lunch" she said
"Pass and KILL" Karma said kicking the ball before firing off a round whcih Koro-sensei dodged.
"Pass" Koro-sensei said
"Pass and KILL" Okano said going for a knife thrust
"YOOHOO Koro-sensei" Irina said, this made Nagisa's spine tingle.
'A bad feeling or something else?' he asked himself
"Hope I'm not interrupting anything sweetie
'YOU KIND OF ARE!' the girl mentally shouted
"Mr Karasuma said you have a top speed of Mach 20, I just had to see it," Irina flirted with him
"He might be overselling it" Koro-sensei said
"I hate to ask but I was also hoping you could get me some Vietnamese Coffee, I've just had a craving for it, and I thought while I'm teaching the student you could get it for me"
"Of course Môn Cherie, I know this perfect little place in Vietnam" he said taking off before the bell rang, Suddenly Irina dropped the love struck act
"Time for class Irina-sensei" Isogai said "shouldn't we be going in?"
"Whatever knock yourself out" she said lighting a cigarette. "but make it study hall I need some peace and quiet, also don't call me sensei when the octopus isn't around. Also don't use my first name. While he is around call me Miss Jelavic" Irina said shocking the students. Some were about ready to use their powers on her. However a certain...smartass just had to push her buttons
"Sure thing Misssssssss YellaBitch" Karma said
"WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?!" she shrieked
"You heard, so pro, let us tell you, there is no way you can take down the Octopus solo. Take it from us we've tried" Karma said
"This is an adult's game and your saplings; so take note. By the you're Nagisa Shiota right" Yellabitch said
"Yeah" Nagisa said as he's bad feeling was back, Suddenly he was pulled into a 30-hit combo deep kiss by the woman making him go limp. Shocking the class!
"You have some information on the Octopus I need, if you could come to the faculty lounge and tell I would forever be grateful" Yellabitch said
'why you conniving little' Kaede thought
"That also goes for the rest of you snot nose punks, tell me what you got and I'll let you go home while this nice gentlemen do it for you" Yellabitch said "This is what separates the pros from the rookies boys and girls connections and technique, now piss off. But first a warning get in my way and you die" she added
'what a fucking bitch!' Nagisa thought
"You okay man?" Maehara asked
"Please tell me you copped a feel" Okajima said
"Kind of hard not too" Nagisa said
"So what now?" Kataoka asked, unaware that the snipers were talking with Takebayashi.
"Ritsu prepare our gear. I want to go one on one with this bitchy bimbo" Hayami said
"Roger, Black Widow gear ready"
'This is my first assignment in which is to kill a creature, everything should be in order, thanks to the kid's intel I know what I'm working with" Yellabitch said winking in a flirty manner at Nagisa who got the shiver
'A couple of us has destroyed some tentacles, which regenerates while he dodges our gunfire, maybe you take them all out and he's easier to kill. If you're planning to get close to him ditch the smoke. Dude's a bloodhound even though he lacks a nose" Nagisa recounted
'This will be a cakewalk, I have an airtight strategy for I am the one and only Irina Jelavic, the closer, the go to gal. I walk in between the rain-
"Yo Yellabitch, are you going to teach us anything?" Maehara asked
"Yeah come on Yellabitch" Nakamura deadpanned
"No disrespect Yellabitch, but aren't you a teacher?" Suguya asked
"IXNAY ON THE BITCHAY, My name is Jelavic! understand JELABITCH is what I'll be if you get it wrong, let's review Jela-V-vic. Bite your lower lip and start humming. Practice quietly for an hour so that way I won't have to put up with you" Jelabitch said
'Worse lesson ever' the class growled.
"I understand you've brought in a shady trio, why wasn't I briefed about it?" Karasuma said, unaware that Maehara was in his Ant-man form listening in.
"Don't judge them by their covers, they're not to mention so in love with they'll do anything for me. Its nearly showtime so sit back and watch" Jelabitch smugly said
"She's up to something, Black Widow you in position yet?" Ant-Man asked
"Nearly, good things she wasn't subtle about where she wanted to do it" Hayami said. When Jelabitch was on her tablet, Okano used her wasp form to find out where Jelabitch was laying the trap and notified Hayami.
"I have return mademoiselle with that Indian Chai you asked for" Koro-sensei said
"Dude's a dumbass" Ant-man said jumping onto an ant
"You're amazing, now my afternoon tea will now be fabulous, Now I have a tiny question, can we meet out in the shed when PE is on?" she sweetly asked
"Oh my, how can I say no, I will be then with certaintea, get it certaintea, because the Chai you see"
While the kids were shooting Mimura spotted the teacher
"Oh come on seriously" he groaned
"He's fallen hard for her" Suguya sighed
"I can't watch it anymore" Maehara groaned "You think he would have more sense"
"Y500 the bitch is bitten by a Black Widow" Nagisa said
"No bet, of course it's going to happen" Kaede said
"Mr Karasuma sir, I get she's a pro, but she's not easy to get along with" Kataoka said
"I know, but the higher up thinks she premium, and I believe them given what she came up with in such time" Karasuma said watching as the shed closed "Where' Hayami?"
"Bathroom" Chiba said
"So what is it you want to talk about Irina sweetheart" Koro-sensei gushed
'Infiltration is something that requires flexibility and finesse' she though "Koro-sensei I can't stand it anymore, you might think me I'm harlot, but I can't control myself around you, it drives me with longing" she said acting cutesy
'This is making me feel sick' Hayami said from the rafter in a black skintight leather outfit with high tech gauntlets and a red hourglass beltbuckle. She also had her hair down
"Oh my, um, er will yes I mean um" Koro-sensei stuttered
"I am a bad woman?" she asked 'That's right keep them there, on my chest and not around the room. I spent all of last night fixing this place up. All for you dirty boy, all for you' she thought
"This is what you want right" Jelabitch said
"I don't think ere we should do it here" Koro-sensei
'See yah stupid' Irina though "Relax cutie, I'll be out in my birthday suit soon" she said
"BIRTHDAY SUIT" Koro-sensei exclaimed as he was shot at.
'Big guns and live ammo: M61 Vulcan, M134 Minigun, M249 Para. Enough speed and firepower to annihilate a small army, keep the I'll stick to the real stuff because I'm a pro thank you very much, assassination complete in 4...3...2...O' she thought before Hayami as the Black Widow jumped behind her cover and socked her in the mouth as the gunfire stop
"Oops sorry Bitch" Black Widow said as she smacked JelaBitch around
"Little brat!" Jelabitch said side kicikng him
"Huh what's going on back there?" Koro-sensei asked
"Training sir" Hayami saluted before reverse roundhousing the bitch.
"Oh by the way Irina 'darling' your attempt failed, you see the lead melts in my body making it completely useless. Not to mention I knew they were there thanks to their body odour. So look at my face and find out why I could tell that"
"You have four eyes" Jelabitch gasped
"Actually the top ones are nostrils" Koro-sensei said "Thanks to which I noticed the metallic scent in the air and the fact these three haven't bathe. Plus Miss Hayami is wearing a new perfume, consisting of: mixed berries, caramel, honey and Sandalwood, chocolate, patchouli and praline if I'm not mistaken"
"You have a nose?" Hayami asked "Who knew" she shrugged slugging Jelbitch again
"That's it" Jelabitch shouted punching Hayami.
"YOU'VE GOT THAT RIGHT" Jelabitch shouted
"stand down I've got this" Black Widow said as she kicked Jelabitch out of teh shed.
"You think that's going to work?" Jelabitch asked pulling out her 1866 Derringer pistol. Hayami smirked as two prongs extended from her gauntlet.
"NO but this will" Black Widow said applying the prongs to the bitch's gun.
"What the bitch asked getting shocked. Once she dropped the gun Black Widow went in with a haymaker but that was intercepted and she was smacked away by Jalbitch.
"I thought that would have landed" Black Widow groaened
"Then what about this?" Jelabitch asked as she slammed Black Widow into the ground.
"You're done" Black Widow growled as she elbowed her in the stomach forcing her off of the redhead and into the tentacles. "Have fun"
Suddenly Class-E was nervous as their teacher was just pulled into the shed after the Black widow punched her.
"COME ON!" Nagisa said leading Maehara, Okajima, Mimura and Yada
"Koro-sensei" the group said
"Did you touch them?" Okajima asked
"Ah that was relaxing, too bad I couldn't be really throughout" the tentacled teacher said "But class isn't going to teach itself is it?" he asked as Maehara and Yada helped up Black Widow
"What happen in there?" Nagisa asked "WHOA, you changed her into retro gym clothes!"
"The explanation of the things he did to this body would take longer than he took to do them, He loosened up my back and shoulders, he did a lymphatic oil massage with slime, a change of clothes just for kicks, and that thing he did with his tentacles" Jelabitch said relaxed
"What thing?" they asked
"What is she implying Koro-sensei?" Nagisa asked
"Um well...adults have certain needs they have to take care of" Koro-sensei said looking away with an :| emoticon
'That's the shadiest answer ever, plus what's with the emoticon face?" Nagisa mentally asked
"Come on Class is about to start so back to it" Koro-sensei said
"Yes sir" they all said
"And Hayami, please change back into your school uniform, not that that's looks not flattering on you
"Unbelievable, I have never faced such humiliation in my entire life! That's it the octopus is dead!" Jelabitch scowled
The next time the bitch took Class-E all she was doing as scowling
'If that yellow squirming monster thinks I'm all out of ideas, he's got it coming' she thought using her tablet PC besides the shitty Wi-Fi "What's with the Wi-Fi"
"I know my pride would be killed if my plans went tits up, with its knickers showing" Karma said
"Karma" Okuda scolded him
"Excuse miss, do you my with we swap you out with Koro-sensei so we can be taught we have entrance exams" Isogai said
"Give me a break, the world's about to end and your worried about entrance exams, that must be nice not knowing your ass from a hole in the grounds, give it up, people with a future are the ones to take entrance exams, which is not any of you lot" the bitch "How about this, forget the studying and I'll give you a portion of the bounty money, about a million each, that will be more money than you see in one life time" she smirked before something smacked into the blackboard
"Get out" Maehara said as he glared at the bitch
"What?" Jelabitch asked as the class death glared at her
"Now you're just a bitch" Maehara shouted
"Give us Koro-sensei back!" one of the girls said
"That's it! I will make you regret your birthday" Jelabitch shouted
"TRY US BITCH!" Suguya said
"Your boobs are way too big to be a teacher's" Kaede said while holding a sign saying 'no big boobs'
"Seriously, that's your complaint?" Nagisa asked taking cover from the paper balls, pencil cases, erasers and pen. "Wait was that a baseball" he thought while Karasuma growled while holding his head.
"Someone should smack the piss out of those little brats" Jelabitch shouted slamming her hands on the desk "I'm too finer woman to be one up by them they were be lucky just to lick the mud off of these stilettos!"
"Are you done?" Karasuma asked typing away on his laptop "Just in case you didn't notice those honey those kids don't agree with your assessment. so if your sticking around for round two, you march back in there suck it up and apologise to them"
"WHAT, I will not be doing that, I'm an assassin not some babysitter teaching them their ABC's" Jelabitch said
"Just come with me" Karasuma said. Once they found their target he was lounging around with a pile of text books and using various writing tools.
"Every since I've been here during sixth period he pours through those books and writes out test questions" Karasuma said
"As fast as he is, you think he would be finish by now" Jelabitch commented
"They're customized to each student, he uses each students strengths and weaknesses and take them into consideration and hands out a test for each student
"No doubt Chiba has Spatial relations to to a 't' so here's a little lateral thinking kickstarter" Koro-sensei said
"He's incredibly smart with an IQ of the charts and he puts most of our arsenal to shame, he's dangerous and contradictory but his a damn fine teacher" Karasuma said walking to the front of the classroom, "Now take a look at those kids"
"You mean the way they goof off?" Jelabitch asked
"No, that's what I call Assassination Badminton, its used as a training to help hone in their accuracy and knife skills and hand eye co-ordination. Everyone here has two roles: Teacher and Target, Student and Assassin. It's a bizarre environment the target has made here where no one can be classed as one type or role, nor is it a place is for easy answers and tidy resolutions; so if you can't make it here as Teacher and Assassin then you should head for home" Karasuma said making Jelabitch realise something "If you want to stick at it, just remember to respect those kids"
"Oh great the bitch's class is next" Kaede huffed.
"This is certainly going to be interesting" Hayami said as Jelabitch walked in and wrote something on the board
'Now you're bullshiting me" the guys asked
"What word has been modified by Incredible, please read it aloud" Jelabitch said
"You are incredible in bed" the class said, the girls were blushing a bit
"You knwo this one again" Jelabitch instructed
"You are incredible in bed" the class read again
"I once took out an American VIP literally, thanks to my feminine charms and grace I got close to him, 'You are incredible' he told and then the poor fool feel head over heels for me. So in thsi case You is modified by the word incredible"
'Back up this is the stuff you teach junior high students, what the hell do you teach high schoolers?" Nagisa asked
"To learn grammar, you need to see how it works in the real world, like a full immersion into another language. The easiest way to do that is by taking a lover that speaks a different language. Look I know grammar is boring and tedious but it underpins our communicational skills. But in my line of work and everyday life it is neccasary, whether its English, French, Portuguese, Russian all people have this need to express our feelings which is way the stuff is important. Now while risqué the example I will be using are true both said by and said to me while out in the field" Jelabitch said "One day you will either hear this stuff or use this stuff"
"Communication" Nakamura and Okajima thought picturing Jack Sparrow and Tomb Raider.
"Look if you think is stupid and doesn't work I'll switch with the calamari, I can't help you like he can, He'll help you on the entrance exams which is not with value, I'll only be able to teach you the conversational arts, so I'm sorry about being a bitch" Irina said "is that on the level with you guys?" she asked shyly making everyone
"First you were about to murder us now you've wimped out on us" Karma said
"You're a better teacher with this attitude" Maehara smiled
"I guess we shouldn't call you miss Jelabitch anymore" Okano smiled
"Are you okay with me being a teacher" Jelabitch gasped
"Well we didn't get off on the right foot with that nickname someone gave you" Karaoke said glaring at a whistling Karma
"Maybe not but we got to call her something" Okano said
"What about Hellabitch?" Karma asked
"What about just calling me Miss Irina, I wouldn't be opposed to that" Jelabitch said
"Sorry Miss but the Bitch is sticking" Maehara snickered
"not that it isn't a pretty name but Miss Irina isn't as fun as Hellabitch!" Okano cheered
"Maybe Bitch-sensei is classy: Kurahashi said
"Good idea, welcome to Class-E Bitch Sensei" Karma smirked
"That's it you hellions are so dead" Bitch-sensei screamed.
"She's settling in quite nicely" Koro-sensei said
"More or less" Karasuma grunted
"Do you know who I am, so help me I will end you" Bitch-sensei said as Karasuma pulled a gun
"Thank you for bringing her here, she might be a diamond in the rough, but she is a welcomed addition to our little academic family" Koro-sensei said walking "Who better to teach the language arts like a globetrotting temptress of an assassin" Koro-sensei said "Now time for some mental gymnastics"
'No way; you did not see this coming. Whenever he's asked about his motives teaching here he dodges the question, but he's turned this place into a perfect place to train for assassinations and life. Bastard's got us dancing to his fiddle"
"YOU WANT BITCH, I'LL BE THE BIGGEST BITCH YOU'VE SEEN!" Bitch sense shouted
"You're cute when you're angry" Kurahashi giggled
"NO I AM NOT!" Bitch sensei said
"No doubt he knows what he's doing" Karasuma smiled.
G'day guys Grizz here with episode 4's adaption featuring Hayami as the Black Widow and Irina's first appearance, who is the only one in Class-E who doesn't have an alter ego. Yes Kaede has one but it will be revealed later so have fun guessing. Also the perfume Koro-sensei said Hayami said is based upon the actual Marvel's Avenger Black Widow perfume.
Ah AC-Anime you skipped a character's arc again. why do you skip over what could be single episode story arcs so we've skipped Maehara, Kataoka and Takebayashi; so they better be OVA. But hey you did the tentacle clue so good job.
Now I will unfortunately skip Okuda's chapter with the poisons, why simple. Karasuma's powers will be introduced and if I have time I'll add what I can before doing the assembly stuff.
So until next time I'll catch you on the flipside