"God please forsake me…".
It's my story, and no one will ever read this book. But then I wonder: "What's the pointing in writing these pages if this book's existence will never be acknowledged by anyone but me?"
Perhaps God is watching me with his eyes full of understanding. Well, I would not like that to be. God please, don't waste your valuable time thinking about me, nor tire your eyes reading this book, I've decided its existence must be unbeknownst to all.
Let me rot in peace. Don't pull me up to heaven, nor push me down to hell. Let the corpse eating worms enjoy their meal when my dying time comes, making this story ends when a grave with my name take place on a cemetery.
As for me, the only reader of this lonely tale of mine, make me fade into the infinite void of inexistence along with this forbidden book.
…
The day before…
"Dear god, I am sure you understand what I am going through, so then I must ask you: is this how my life was supposed to be when you impaled my existence into this human body? What is so nice about improving my spirit if that means being unhappy?
I must've done something really bad on my previous lives, for I can feel my accursed soul becoming more damaged every passing hour. I feel that this hole I have been digging for a long time won't lead me to fresh water for my dry mouth, nor it will be a barren cause, no, I only expect to find my damnation down there. When I get the job done I will only find answers, that will reveal the truth of this unfortunate fate you gave me, my lord."
…
"Dried flowers are not allowed here…".
"Sunshine is orange, the skies smile while we drown ourselves in choking tears. This is called being alive.".
Will the day ever come… when I'll finally be able to smile again?