"Can't sleep?"

I cringed and stopped in my tracks, peeking through my squinted eyes at the figure at the other end of the corridor. Great. Just fucking great. Erwin was standing on the other end of the corridor and started walking towards me. He was still dressed in his uniform; does Papa Scout even need to sleep? I wanted to turn and walk in the opposite direction, but something told me I'd end up in his office tomorrow if I did. Do we really have to do this now? I let him reach me and we walked in silence, comfortable not saying anything. "Do you ever sleep?"

He chuckled quietly and shook his head. "These days, sleep is hard to come by," he said, rubbing his eyes wearily. "Especially when there's so much to be done."

Of course. He was always busy with something. Meetings. Planning. Running. He never stopped. It was times like this where I could see myself in him. Back in the Underground, I never stopped. Running a business kept me up at all hours and I never stopped working. The only difference was that I was a criminal and he was trying to lead humanity to freedom. Bit of a difference, I thought. "Why do you do it?" I'd always been curious. Every Commander that took the role, why did they do it? "Why did you decide to become Commander?"

"I have wanted and always will want humanity to rise above titans as the dominant species," he said, looking down at me with his icy blue eyes.

I quirked an eyebrow and stopped to put a hand on my hip. "Simple as that?"

"Simple as that," he said, nodding. I expected something more personal or selfish, not something so noble. He just wanted to help people? It was a shame that everyone who criticized his methods, didn't see it his way. "Why did you decide to build an empire?"

Way to go Eyebrows, throwing a curve ball like the best of them. Out of all the questions I expected him to ask me, it wasn't that one. What the hell though, he's been honest with me up until this point. I suppose I should return the favor. "I wanted to undermine the whole Military Police operation in the Underground," I said, thinking hard so I could best explain myself. "After their execution, I needed something to help me deal with my anger. I figured that if I cut out the middle man, the Military Police, when it came to goods distribution, I could eventually render them useless and bring their whole operation down. It just spiraled from there and became the criminal empire it is now."

Eyebrows didn't say anything, just kept walking. Maybe it wasn't the answer he wanted or expected. Most people thought that I started my business because I wanted power. It was never about power; not until people put me on a pedestal. "I'm sorry about my outburst earlier," I said, looking up at him as we came to a stop in the corridor. "Right before I came to you, I had the pleasure of Shorty's company. He just has a way of pissing me off, but I shouldn't ave taken it out on you."

"It makes sense now," he responded. At least he knew well enough not to comment on mine and Shorty's complicated relationship. I also noticed him eyeing the chains on my chest, a glint in his eye. "Despite the way he acts, he is a good soldier. A good man. He's just as complicated as you, you know?"

I raised an eyebrow and looked at him. "You think I'm complicated?" He nodded and I feigned heart ache. "Man, Erwin. You really know the way to a girls heart. But for real, despite how famous he was in the Underground, I don't know the first thing about him. I don't suppose I made the best first impression, but still."

It was then that I noticed a shadow that wasn't there before. Something moved in the corner of my eye but when I turned to look, there was nothing there; just a dark corner. I knew to trust my instincts though. Someone was listening and I had a very good idea of who it could be. How could I possibly know, you ask? Nobody tip toed around the Commander. Nobody. Unless a topic of conversation sparked their interest. Slick, Shorty. Real slick.

"He'll warm up to you… eventually," he said, but even he didn't look convinced. The day that me and Corporal Asshat get along, will be the day I dedicate my life to the Scouts and that's never going to happen. "Well, we can dream."

I heard him chuckle to myself and I wrapped my arms around myself. How had I gotten to a point where I could casually walk with the Commander of the fucking Scouts, talking about humanities most worshiped soldier, while I was nothing more than a criminal? And I thought life in the Underground was weird. "Uh, Sir," I said, poking his arm and making him look at me. "I've never properly thanked you, for what you did and have done for me-

"-there's no need to thank me, Salem," he said, cutting me off with a small smile on his face. I shook my head and carried on.

"There are too many reasons to count as to why I should be thanking you. You've fought for me, now and for my family when no one else was willing. I know what you did, Sebastian told me."
"What I did?" He cocked an eyebrow, curiosity in his eyes and I nodded. Here goes nothing, because the shadow in the corner is going to learn a thing or too.

"Sebastian told me that he'd been in contact with you. That when they were lined up to be hanged, you were appealing to have the laws changed around crimes and punishments. You were fighting for them and I'll always be grateful for that and I'll always be in debt to you."

He reached out cautiously and placed a hand on shoulder, looking to me for assurance and I nodded and he patted my shoulder gently. "I only wish I could have done more."

"You did enough," I replied, giving him a small smile. He dropped his arm but kept his gaze on me. I always felt like he was analyzing me. "Thank you, by the way, for returning my stuff. You didn't have to, but I'm glad you did. You gave them back to me."

He shuffled on the spot and I grinned openly. This was the first time I'd ever seen him acting awkward about something. Was the great Commander trying to hide his embarrassment? "You know, this is the first time I think I've ever seen you act awkward about something. The great Commander, too humble for his own good."

He chuckled quietly. "Yes, your Commander. Don't forget that, Salem. Now if you'll excuse me, I have papers to file and eventual sleep to catch up on and I suggest you do the same. Goodnight, Salem."

I nodded and watched him walk away, rounding on the person hiding in the darkness. I raised an eyebrow, crossing my arms over my chest and cocked a hip. "Any other person and I guarantee they wouldn't have seen you," I said, flicking my head to tell him to come out. "I, on the other hand, am not blind nor stupid, Shorty. If you're going to ease-drop on my conversations, you better do a better job of hiding next time. Oh and repeat anything I said tonight, and I'll skin you while you sleep."

I winked and left him there, his face passive but I could see the shock in his eyes. Yeah, you're not a sly as you think you are. I walked back to my room and tucked myself into bed, laying on my back while staring at the ceiling. I still can't sleep. I just have more to think about. I don't remember falling asleep, but then again who does?

"Hold her down," someone yelled, ignoring my terrified screams. Why were they doing this? Where's my mama? The men surrounded me, staring down at me with excited eyes. What are they doing? Why did they take me from my home?

"Mama," I yelled over and over again, but she never came. Where was my mama? She never left me alone like this. Did they hurt her? One of the men bent down by my side, brandishing a needle filled with a clear liquid. What were they doing to me?

"You're going to be magnificent," he whispered leaning in close to my ear. Magnificent? What was he talking about? "Just wait. We'll be unstoppable."

The man pressed the needle into the skin of my neck, ignoring my agony-filled screams and depressed the liquid into my body. I was on fire. Everything burned and my vision went blurry. Mama? I need you mama. My screams were ignored and through my blurred vision, I saw the men crowding around me, staring down at me with glee-filled eyes. What were thy doing to me? Why are they hurting me? I let out an ear-piercing scream from the depths of my throat and thrashed against my restraints. Someone help me. Someone, please help-

I shot up, pushing myself into the corner of my bed and pulled my knees to my chest. I couldn't breathe. It felt so real. It felt too real. What the hell just happened? My head slumped against my knees while I tried my best to control my ragged breathing. I'm losing my mind. Once I had my breathing under control, I wiped the sweat from my forehead and lent into the wall like a deflated balloon. I was having these dreams more frequently, but I still didn't know what they meant. Why am I dreaming of a little girl? What does it all mean? Jesus, Salem. You're actually going crazy.

The morning light streamed through my window, casting a soft glow on my bed and I forced myself out of bed and down to the showers. Once I was clean and changed, I skipped out on breakfast and went straight to my first training session. We were back to hand to hand combat, but unlike my first training session, the other cadets had improved greatly. While most people had a sparring partner, Shadis preferred to move me around, having me fight different people every time. He said something about it helping me practice with different fighting styles. I think I would have gotten bored if I fought the same person day after day and having me fight other people kept them on their toes. Today I was sparring with a boy called Jean. I'd picked up everyone's names as training went on and I'd fought Jean before. He was tall and horse-looking, but he had a good heart. Despite his occasional arrogant demeanor, he'd actually tried to befriend me and though I shut him down every time, he still kept up a cheery attitude with me. People here are forgetting who I am. I'm not sure how I feel about that.

We got into position and when Shadis told us to begin, we both moved into action. I threw the first punch, grazing his torso and I dodged his own punch, which was close to my head. A con of being four feet nothing. He grunted when I hit him and I ducked under his arm, kicking him in the back so he went sprawling towards the ground. I'd won the fight… or so I thought. Instead of staying down, he rolled back onto his feet and staying low, he slammed me to the ground by my waist, pinning me down with his knees. He aimed a punch at my face and swung down, stopping just short with a grin on his face. "I win."

Look, my fighting skills were beyond these Cadets and had been since I got here, but when I fought, I fought to kill and letting the cadets get a few wins in every so often seemed more productive than beating them every time. Plus, I couldn't risk getting in to trouble now that Dok was keeping a close eye on me.

"That you did," I said, returning his grin with a smile and once he'd stood up, he extended his hand and hoisted me to my feet. "Next time we spar though, maybe I won't go so easy on you."

I left Jean with a shocked expression on his face, asking if I'd let him win but I just turned and winked, leaving him to go sit down away from the other cadets. It was still hard to believe that I'd been here almost ten months and I hadn't tried to escape yet. Not one attempt. I'd also gotten my first response from Sebastian. In all honesty, I hadn't expected him to write back given that any form of communication with the Scouts would only end up putting us at risk, but he still wrote back. Considering he'd always told me how much he hated writing, he'd written pages upon pages telling me that he loved me and missed me so much. I would never admit it, but reading something Sebastian had written, now knowing that he knew I was still alive had brought me close to tears. I handed Erwin a new letter every three weeks or so and always got a response back as quickly as he could write.

Sitting there, I couldn't help my mind wandering back to the dream I'd had. Could I even call it a dream? It was more like a confusing nightmare. It had been bugging me all morning and I was wracking my brain, trying to figure out what I was trying to tell myself. I'd never thought about it much before, considering this wasn't the first time I'd had that dream but I was no closer to making sense of it.

And Shorty listening in on mine and Erwin's conversation last night. He knew more than most knew about me now and I didn't like it. Anyone else and I probably wouldn't have cared so much, but Shorty had ammo now in a vicious verbal battle. Why was he even listening? What did he care about where I came from? Shorty just fucked with my head. He either hated me or didn't care about my existence.

After the cadets training finished and I started sparring with Eren, he picked up on my frustrated mood immediately. Sometimes he can be perceptive.

"What's wrong?"

I looked up from tying the lace of my boot and raised an eyebrow. "Wrong?"

He was staring down at me with concern in his eyes. What? "You look like you want to murder someone," he commented, flicking his head. When don't I look like that, Yeager? "Did someone say something? Or was it your hand? Does it hurt?"

"First of all," I said, masking my frustration with a forced smile. I stood and patted him on his shoulder. "Cool it with the questions. I'm fine. No. No. And yes, but it's manageable. I just didn't get a lot of sleep last night." He opened his mouth, but I cut him off. "I'm fine, Yeager."

He nodded and we started our session, noting to myself that Eren was getting good at fighting; almost as good as me. The only problem was that he fought like me, which made us both predictable to each other. I'm going to have to find someone on my level to fight Eren, so he gets more experience. Maybe if I asked Shadis or Eyebrows to find him someone else to help him train. I could tell he was holding back, watching me carefully so in a moment of anger, I flipped him to the ground, harder than I'd normally throw him and watched him wince in pain. Oh fuck. "Sorry," I murmured, offering him a hand and pulling him to his feet. "Guess I'm in a worse mood than I thought. Let's call it a day today, kid. You did good. I'm just an old fuck, apparently who can't control her emotions." I didn't wait for a response, just walked away. If I had looked back, I would have seen the concerned look on his face. Fuck man. That dream has spun me out. Poor kid was just trying to help and I threw him to the ground and walked off. No time like the present to be a colossal dick.

On my walk back to my room I saw the Cadet who's arm I'd broken, Samuel I'd learned his name was and the moment he laid eyes on me, he glared and started stomping. Little fucking child. No matter what Erwin said, I knew that something wasn't right and my gut was telling me that the shit stain in front of me had something to do with it. "Scum."

Had I not been listening, I probably wouldn't have heard him but he set me off the moment he opened his stupid fucking mouth. I was behind him in seconds, slamming his head into the wall next to him. "If you have a problem with me," I hissed, standing on my toes to get closer to his ear. "Take it up with the Commander, but I swear to god. If I hear one more word out of you, I'm going to carve you up into little pieces and serve you to your lapdogs."

I shoved him away and left the corridor, almost proud of myself that I didn't beat him into the ground. I could have, but I didn't. Behavioral improvement as Shorty said. And yet if he found out, he'd still find a way to spin it into a bad thing. I thought about going back to my room or hiding on the roof but I had chores to finish before the end of the day. I didn't want another lecture from Shorty or Shadis, both had been on my case for slacking on the cleaning. I'll finish my chores as quickly as I can and hide in my room for the rest of the evening, catching up on some much needed sleep.

Hey everyone! You might be wondering why this chapter is unusually short but don't worry, I'm not short changing you. I was having trouble writing this chapter and I was struggling to get words onto metaphorical paper. As a result, I decided to split this chapter into two so you'd still have a semi-regular upload while I finish the end of the chapter and post that too. You'll probably get another upload sometime at the beginning of next week, but until then, I hope you enjoyed the latest half chapter. Let me know what you think in the reviews and I'll see you next time.

-QueenOfTheWarFlowers