Guest Mazzytech101
Thanks your 're right Qui-Gon can get into a mess easily and yes, Ob-Wan does have to save the day.
Anonymous Guest. I often wondered why he didn't see the danger in Anakin and the arrogance in Xanatos. It is the reason why I like dissecting him in my stories although I do like him, but I like Obi-Wan better.
Guest Cooljana15 Your wait is over here is another chapter hope you like it.
3 anonymous Guests. Thank you all.
I do love to write Obi-Wan stories, and I like keeping the suspense going. Thank you to all my lovely readers. Here is the next chapter.
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CHAPTER 6
Bitterness filled him as he sank to his knees. His soul had descended to the depths of darkness.
He could feel all good inside him bleeding out through his pores. He'd killed in anger; an innocent child.
He shook his head, (no I didn't kill him, but he's dead anyway. I've destroyed another life!)
He pulled his robe around to stave off the cold that was penetrating his bones; he wanted to draw on the force, but not the light. He didn't deserve the light, even though it spread out across the cave.
Illumination filled the corners of the cave in rapid succession bright glowing crystals broke through the walls; appearing in clusters.
Glancing around now, he could see that it was more a large cavern than a cave.
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Being highly attuned to the Force his senses told him that all aspects of the Force were imbedded deep into the structure. Living, unifying, dark and light bounced back at him all beckoning him to latch on.
His chest ached from the torment. Qui-Gon did not care, mostly on his mind was why! Why did Obi-Wan have to die?
A familiar hum caught his attention fully. Spinning around he expected to see a lit sabre, instead a cluster of white crystals expanded in size.
The humming ceased and all was still and eerie.
It seemed like an eternity before he could bring his hostility at the wrongness of events under control, and speak.
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"Where am I?" Qui-Gon said sharply, and the walls echoed his question back to him.
"What is this place?"
'Am I dead?"
Again silence was his only answer and his irritation rose again. "I must be here for a reason, why won't you answer me?"
Qui-Gon felt like drawing his sabre and smashing every crystal here. He found his patience all but gone.
Then it happened the cluster broke away from the wall and came to hover in front of him. It grew in size causing Qui-Gon to shade his eyes from the brilliant white glow.
He squinted, but kept his eyes open as wisps of white light spread out like strips of glowing white ribbon waving in an imaginary breeze.
He recognised it to be the same phenomena that had encased Obi-Wan, and for a moment his heart felt a touch of happiness warm it.
" Obi-Wan! Obi-Wan is that you?"
Qui-Gon was mesmerised by the wispy tentacles, but when the form took the shape of a man that he did not recognise; he felt that warmth disappear from his heart; freezing over and he could hardly breathe.
"Who are you, why am I here and where is Obi-Wan?"
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"I am André, guardian spirit of the living."
"You're a guardian! How could you be a guardian of the living and let Obi-Wan die?"
"I did not let Obi-Wan die."
"He's dead!" He said, lacing the reply with contempt.
"Obi-Wan is in the hands of the Force, and to answer your question, no you're not dead, but at a dangerous crossroad in your life Qui-Gon Jinn."
"What do you mean?"
"You chose to abandon the path you were destined to travel and you've let your perceived failures rule you for far too long." André sensed Qui-Gon was going to object and he held up his hand.
"You can't deny it, otherwise you would have accepted Obi-Wan as your apprentice before he lost all hope. You've allowed your resentment to grow beyond reason and cloud your judgement. You blame the Jedi council for all your failures, you blame yourself, and you're angry at Obi-Wan."
Qui-Gon shook his head. "No, I'm not angry at Obi-Wan; I failed him. He should hate me. I hate myself for what I did."
"He didn't hate you, he felt guilty for failing you."
Qui-Gon laughed mirthlessly. "How can he be guilty of anything he was just a child and I pushed him far beyond his limit."
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"Yes you did! That's why you're angry at him, because you endeavoured to push him away, and he fought hard to change your mind. You thought he would give up and accept your ruling, but he wouldn't. At first you didn't want to hurt him, but he wouldn't leave you alone in yourself imposed misery. He wanted to be your apprentice more than life itself."
Qui-Gon wouldn't admit it, but he'd sensed it and even though he'd kept him at arm's length, they'd exchanged glances in the halls of the temple and Qui-Gon had always raised his shields whenever the lad had been within close proximity of him and he knew why.
The Force in its infinite wisdom was pushing them together, but Qui-Gon was still crippled with a wound from his last encounter at being a master to an impressionable young man. He wouldn't risk that agony again.
Yoda pushed too, and pressed hard to make him see what was in front of him. He fought the old master all the way, and now he seethed knowing that Yoda sent that kind- hearted and compassionate young boy to Bandomeer.
All in the hope that Qui-Gon would do the right thing and change his mind; how could Yoda do that to the boy?
"Yes, you blame Yoda too!"
Qui-Gon felt his ire build at this guardian. "Yoda knew I wasn't a worthy Jedi, why would he risk a child's future because he wanted me to train him?"
"Yoda knew you were worthy, he knew Obi-Wan was meant to be yours. Obi-Wan thought you were worthy. The force deemed you worthy. You were born with a gift, but you built strong shields around your connection, and stopped listening."
Qui-Gon gazed at the shimmering form and although he felt his aggravation rise, he didn't want to argue with a Spirit. "I know my limitations and I will not continue as I am. What does it matter what the future holds for me?"
"It matters, to the galaxy and it matters to the survival of the Jedi order."
Qui-Gon couldn't hold back his anger. "Go away, I will do what I must, I stopped listening because I don't care anymore."
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Andre looked up away from Qui-Gon's glare and seemed to be communicating with something that Qui-Gon couldn't see.
Then he gazed thoughtfully at the lost Jedi. "You've fallen far Qui-Gon; you condemn the Jedi order and the Galaxy?"
Qui-Gon shook his head in denial. "The Jedi order has survived for millennia's and even if it doesn't I will not be a part of an order who I suspect, sent Obi-Wan to Bandomeer under false pretences."
"The responsibility may not be yours alone, but if you had been focused on the present instead of your past; the future of the Jedi order would be assured."
"The past is all I have left now; Obi-Wan should have been my present and my future, but I destroyed that."
"The past has you in its clutches still Qui-Gon, and to answer another of your questions, you have been brought here to make a choice!"
"There is no choice!" He said folding his arms across his chest.
"Then Obi-Wan's suffering was in vain."
André raised his hand and Qui-Gon felt a disturbance behind him and he turned.
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A dark shadow crept across the wall and its gloom silently spread out engulfing the glowing crystals extinguishing them.
Coruscant's senate building appeared in the centre of the murkiness.
Sinister clouds moved through it causing the building to grow with grotesque statues forming to guard the entrance.
The loud cackle of sith filled the air and people were cut down and killed. All running away from the senate; towards the safety of the Jedi temple. Thousands, seeking out protection from the Jedi.
The Jedi temple; such a magnificent structure stood strong and tall above the darkness, but bit by bit it began to crumble.
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Qui-Gon couldn't take his eyes off the images.
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Shards of Lightening hit the spires as Jedi, young and old were sucked into the blackness surrounding it and screams were heard as they died.
Standing in the centre of all that terror; dark figures rose with sabres lit, not those of the Jedi, but those of sith.
Red blades slashed out and cut down anyone who resisted, dark robes billowed in the churning coil of the dark side.
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"What is this trickery?" Qui-Gon snapped when he recognised his own features in amongst the dark with glowing yellow eyes.
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"Trickery you say! The future, Qui-Gon, is not trickery. Feel it; it's inside you now so much disgust and resentment!"
"I would never turn into that!" Qui-Gon said resentfully.
"You think you're immune to the dark side, no one is! Temptation is always there beckoning you; even now.
"No! My last apprentice was the one who was tempted and fell not me! That future is wrong; I would never turn."
"Yet you told Obi-Wan he would turn! He was nothing like the one you coveted. You knew that, and yet you thought nothing of destroying Obi-Wan."
Those words hit Qui-Gon and filled him with mortification.
"Your emotions are out of control and even a child like Obi-Wan felt your resentment long before you rejected him."
Qui-Gon didn't want to acknowledge it, but he knew it was true.
"Perhaps a reminder of the past will give you an insight into your future." André said waving his hand.
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More shadows filled the cave, and the image of a dark haired apprentice appeared.
Qui-Gon recognised his former padawan Xanatos.
Intimidating and mistreating his younger peers. Striding through the temple showing his true colours. Using the power that Qui-Gon foolishly gave him. Lying and cheating causing damage to any and all who stood in his way.
He heard the lies his padawan told, but his faith that he would be a great Jedi was stronger than his good sense, and the padawan persuaded his master that he was pure of heart and nothing was ever his fault.
Qui-Gon gazed at this dark image of his former padawan. His downfall had been to choose him against Yoda's, and the council's wishes, and then his pride prevented him from accepting the truth.
Qui-Gon watched the image of the dark apprentice, seemingly holding a sabre at his throat, laughing in Qui-Gon's face telling his master that he lacked common sense and was easily led astray.
"A foolish and weak old man who failed, and you will always fail!"
"No!" Qui-Gon stepped back away from that evil.
The image of the dark Jedi continued his rant as he faded into the murky blackness
"You want to follow me. I feel the darkness in you. You will join me."
"No I won't! Leave me, you mean nothing to me!" Qui-Gon said and turned away.
Andre pointed to the retreating image and said. "He deceived and manipulated you, but you chose to ignore it. You will never be rid of him until you accept that truth and leave him in the past."
"It's too late!" he whispered.
"Only if you choose to follow that path; rid yourself of the past. The present and the future are all here to see in this cave. You have a choice; reflect on your life and understand what you have become. Look and listen; seek enlightenment, and be the Jedi that you could be, otherwise all will be lost."
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Qui-Gon lowered his head and closed his eyes, thoughts and images filled his head.
How many times had he allowed his anger at his former apprentice, to be placed squarely on Obi-Wan's shoulders!
So many times in the temple, through no fault of his own Obi-Wan felt the wrath of being the whipping boy, and never understood why.
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A cold blast of air filled his lungs causing him to open his eyes as another scene grew across the wall. This time it was in the temple garden.
Qui-Gon hurrying through the garden, and coming upon three boys arguing. He saw Obi-Wan in the centre of the commotion.
Accusations were being thrown at the boy. He'd stolen something of theirs. Ah! He remembered thinking, I was right, he is just like him!
He didn't care to look for the truth, even when it was as plain as day to a seasoned Jedi Master.
He listened to the accusations from the other two, and practically agreed that Obi-Wan was a thief. He remembered a twinge of guilt fill him when he gazed upon the shocked and sorrowful visage on Obi-Wan's face, so he backed off. Telling them to call for another master to sort out their problems and then he left them.
Qui-Gon couldn't take his eyes off that young boy in the vision, Obi-Wan never stood a chance and now he was dead.
The images faded and once again he was alone in the cavern.
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000
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He remembered that day vividly. He'd argued with the council the previous night about his mission status, and his duty.
The council had ordered him to stand down and remain in the temple, but he would not stay there and be goaded by them into taking another padawan.
He'd gone over the council's head and contacted the Chancellor to give him a mission, and was heading through the garden making his way out of the temple.
His annoyance at them fell onto Obi-Wan's shoulders and he didn't care to find out if the boy was innocent or not.
Scenes popped up at random all revolving around his lack of good sense or judgement, and his resentment of Yoda, the council and especially Obi-Wan.
In another vision he was arguing with Yoda, who was saying that Obi-Wan was like a boy he once knew. Qui-Gon interrupted the old master and told him that he didn't want to be reminded of his previous padawan and certainly didn't want another to fail him.
However, much to Qui-Gon's embarrassment Yoda stated that he was comparing the likeness of Obi-Wan to Qui-Gon.
They were watching a duel and Qui-Gon knew Yoda was pushing them together. He berated Obi-Wan and told him he was an angry young man and could easily fall to the dark side if he didn't control his temper. He'd said those words to push the boy out of his life.
Each image of the past was more destructive than the last and he could see Obi-Wan's self-confidence being chipped away; long before they came to Bandomeer.
Qui-Gon's legs felt weak and he sat down on the cold ground, he couldn't deny the truth any more. Those images were true. It was his own selfish, stubborn arrogance that caused him to be that way.
Turning him into an angry and bitter man; he couldn't push it away any longer and it shamed him. André was right, Yoda had been right and Obi-Wan had paid with his life.
"I have done this; I cannot blame anyone but myself. I did lose my way and I know Obi-Wan would have been a great Jedi. Please take me and give Obi-Wan a chance to become the Jedi he is supposed to be?"
Qui-Gon's voice almost cracked as he genuinely offered him-self instead of Obi-Wan.
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"It is too late Qui-Gon; this isn't about Obi-Wan anymore. You have to find your way on your own. You were a great Jedi, and if you use the Force as it was intended you will reach enlightenment and you will teach others to use the power they have, to prevent the darkness that is coming.
"Teach others! You mean take a padawan?"
"Not only an apprentice, but show the council that they are fallible."
"The council won't listen to me, they said that sith were extinct, and we've not seen or heard from them for over a thousand years. They would know if they'd returned?"
"Your Jedi council is fallible; they are set in their ways, somewhat like you."
Qui-Gon shook his head in dismay. "That vision I saw, with the temple crumbling, and me! You said that I would condemn the Jedi and the Galaxy. If I go back and do as you ask will the future be secure."
"If you go back only to do what I ask then no! You have to make a choice between what is right and wrong."
Qui-Gon couldn't believe that in the span of one lifetime the Jedi order would no longer exist. "What if I fail?"
"The future is changing as we speak. Events will change, new opportunities may come to pass and yet others will fulfil their fate unimpeded. It is the training you impart that would keep the light from being extinguished."
"Perhaps the dark times won't eventuate, you did say the future is changing?"
"Only the way it comes about, evil is out there waiting and getting stronger. That will not change. Only the depth of that darkness is in the balance now."
"Was he the chosen one?"
"Ah! You speak of your Jedi prophecy of the one to restore balance to the force. You thought you found him in your last apprentice, and you always believed it was your destiny to find and train the Jedi's fabled one."
"Yes, I've studied the tenets of the prophecy for many years and I felt certain that I would know him when he came. For a time I did think it was Xanatos and my mistake was to allow him to believe it too. Was it Obi-Wan?" He said forlornly.
"To answer your question Qui-Gon, no, Obi-Wan is not the 'Jedi's' chosen one. Your Jedi philosophers created that myth. They presumed that when a Jedi turned away from the light it would alter the balance of the Force, so they created a prophecy in the hope of keeping wayward Jedi dedicated to the light.
"A myth! So you're saying that there isn't a chosen one who will bring balance to the Force?"
"Some are born to do great things in their lifetime and others are born to destroy everything in their path. Nevertheless, no matter what the future holds for the Jedi, the force will always remain unwavering. It is the individuals that are at risk of being out of balance. The force is a constant entity and will guide those who seek enlightenment throughout their life." André said gazing off into the distance; then he spoke again.
"You're an intelligent man Qui-Gon; so deep down inside, you must realise that to bestow ultimate power into the hands of one Force sensitive being, could unleash a supremacy that could be manipulated by one with evil intentions. Destroying said chosen one's morality and honesty, leaving mistrust and anger. Even the kindest and gentlest of hearts can be turned by destructive forces to do the bidding of corrupt men."
"Then why couldn't that happen to Obi-Wan why was he so important?"
"Throughout infinite history in each generation and in times of great need, there comes a Jedi who stands out above the rest; a beacon of light; admired, respected and revered. Not necessarily the most powerful, but sincere, reliable and dedicated. Obi-Wan was chosen by the Force to be that beacon in his lifetime."
The fire and annoyance in Qui-Gon dissipated and was replaced by inner rationale once more. "And it was my destiny to train that beacon of light, but I let my arrogance rule me?"
"It has happened before in history Qui-Gon, but the Jedi haven't learned from their mistakes. Complacency and arrogance, combined with deceit and treachery can topple even the most powerful of opponents if they fail to recognise it."
"Why are you telling me this after what I did?"
"Each Jedi will have a part to play in allowing evil to envelope the galaxy and if you continue on your path of self destruction, that outlook will come sooner and be darker than you could imagine. You have to find the peace that has eluded you and regain harmony in your life. You are knowledgeable, Qui-Gon and you advocate 'to live in the moment'. The living Force will guide you, but you must open yourself to all aspects of the Force and take your own advice and nurture with an open heart. Reflect and meditate on everything I've told you; if you want to prevent the annihilation of all Force sensitives in the galaxy."
Andre faded into the darkness and Qui-Gon closed his eyes preparing to purge all negative feelings, but he opened them again when a bright glow filled the cavern.
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His heart filled with joy when Obi-Wan's shimmering outline came into view. A blue glow surrounded the young boy.
He didn't expect to see Obi-Wan again, and he was surprised to see him looking so alive.
Of course he knew he wasn't, but he hoped that he could apologise before he disappeared again.
"Obi-Wan, I am so sorry. I was a foolish and arrogant man, and I caused you to doubt yourself. You did nothing wrong and you will always be the padawan of my heart. I will endeavour to keep the light in the galaxy for you."
The glowing image lifted his small hand and placed it over his heart and gave Qui-Gon a slight bow and a brilliant smile.
It was the most luminous smile he'd ever seen on Obi-Wan's face and Qui-Gon couldn't help but smile back.
A touch of sadness welled inside as the beautiful image began to glow brighter and the cave lit up when the white wisps seemingly danced across the cavern lighting up every crystal in there.
He was in awe of the way the light around Obi-Wan glowed and then he was gone.
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Qui-Gon knew it was time to cleanse his soul, and he closed his eyes holding onto the image of Obi-Wan.
He'd already accepted André's words and he allowed the Force access into his body to purge any negative feelings he'd been harbouring.
He drew the force around him. It was comforting and he felt its healing energy fill him with a new hope.
He wasn't certain how long he'd remained in that position, but the force felt stronger and brighter in him than it had for years and it felt invigorating.
Other senses were working as well; his sense of smell told him that he was in a familiar place and the aroma being drawn in through his nostrils was the distinct smell of his favourite Caff and behind closed eyelids he felt warmth on his face.
He opened his eyes and had to squint away from the bright sun light. He was sitting on the floor facing a window; a very familiar one.
Confusion filled him once again. He glanced around and to his bewilderment he was in his quarters at the temple.
He rose to his feet, but disorientation made him sway and he grasped the back of the couch to balance himself.
"André?" he said glancing from side to side. "How did I get here?"
Silence was his only answer and his heart pounded loudly in his chest accentuated by the quiet of his surroundings. He didn't understand how he could be back on Coruscant when just a few moments ago he was on Bandomeer. It was impossible for him to be in his quarters.
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TBC...