Time for a new chapter.
First of all I'd like to say thanks for the overwhelming number of reviews I received for the last chapter, it's so awesome to see that so many of you like this story.
Secondly, thanks to Code for doing an excellent and super fast job beta reading.
I also want to say that this chapter has a teensy bit of M rated material in it, but only like a few sentences so I decided to keep it T for now. Although if you object to that, or feel that it needs to be changed to M, then let me know and I'll adjust it accordingly.
Lastly, I just wanted to let you guys know that it might take a bit longer between updates seeing as my beta reader is going away for a while.
I hope you all enjoy this chapter, and as always, reviews are welcomed and appreciated
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Miku stared blankly at the door the pinkette had just left through, still bewildered by the amazing sensations she just received. She couldn't believe that Luka had been so willing, and was glad that she had seemingly decided to give her a comprehensive experience.
She could feel the flame in her heart burn brighter than ever, and already had lyrical ideas bouncing around in her head, finding it funny that the cover she had used to obtain the wonderful experience was an actual result of their actions. Miku sunk into the soft couch and remembered the soft feeling of Luka's lips on hers, and shivered when she recalled the way the pinkette had shoved her against the wall.
After getting lost in her daydreams for quite some time, Miku sighed blissfully, before skipping off to her bedroom merrily. She got out a pen and a pad of paper, and began to write down her new, exciting feelings, quickly forming them into powerful lyrical ideas that she had always been too scared to say.
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Luka left the tealette's apartment initially feeling ecstatic that she finally got somewhere with Miku, and that Miku had been the one to ask for it. She couldn't believe that a simple kiss had escalated into so much more, especially when they were only meant to be pretending, although Luka certainly hadn't been, and from what she could tell, Miku wasn't either. Either way, the experience was magical and she found herself wanting more the minute she left the building.
But as she drove home, as the adrenaline, endorphins and hormones faded, Luka began to comprehend the reality of the situation. She realized that even though she would class the night's events as the most pleasurable and most incredible experience of her life, she knew that it could never happen again.
Luka had been almost oblivious to the consequences of a relationship with Miku, it's as if she almost forgot about her horrific past and all the sacrifices she made to leave it there. She had to stop this sick fantasy of hers now before it got to out of hand, before she became any more attached, any more attracted to the tealette than she already was.
The pinkette wished that the kiss never happened, seeing as it acted as a catalyst and let her realize that a fairy-tale future with Miku was impossible. She had been so lost in her love for the tealette that she had forgotten about all the things that could- and would- go wrong… She was lost in her own little fantasy where Miku would love her back and the world would be okay with it. But Luka knew that could never happen, especially with the way society was today, and the thought of never being with the only person in the world for her crushed her and made the rest of the journey home miserable.
Luka arrived at her apartment door with a glum look on her face, still sore from her earlier realizations. She opened the door slowly, hoping that she wouldn't make a noise and disturb her cousin. However, her efforts to avoid a conversation were in vain seeing as Miki was on the sofa, watching TV. "W-why aren't you in bed yet?" She asked slightly angrily.
Miki looked up from the large screen with a look of confusion plastered on her features. "It's only just past nine, what are you talking about?" Miki found it strange that her usually attentive cousin had lost track of time.
Luka glanced at her watch and realized that it was a lot earlier than she thought it was. "Oh." She said quietly, heading off to bed regardless of the early hour. Her thinking session in the drive home had left her in no mood to talk with her cousin.
Miki noticed how uncharacteristically gloomy Luka looked, and she found it even more peculiar that her pink haired cousin could be upset after a date with Miku when she would come home with the brightest smile after just a simple day of work with the tealette. "Are you alright? You don't look so great."
Luka sighed as she recognized that a talk with her cousin was inevitable; even though it was an activity that she really didn't want to participate in, especially considering the events with the tealette. "I… I'm fine." She said quietly, hoping Miki would take her word.
Miki could tell that the pinkette wasn't, even without her characteristic stutter. "Did the date go badly?" She questioned, thinking that was the only possible thing that could upset Luka considering how happy she'd been over the last few weeks.
"I don't really want to talk about it Miki." She mumbled, dearly hoping that her cousin would drop the subject.
Miki really wanted to know what was making Luka upset, and so quickly thought up a way around the situation. "Wait! I need to talk to you about something. My mom called."
Luka turned around and sat next to the redhead, knowing she had no reason not to. "Yeah? What did she have to say?"
"She asked for us to go visit her, to celebrate her birthday. She wants us to come as soon as possible; tomorrow if we can make it." Miki informed. "She said that you didn't have to come if you were too busy, but she would like to see you again."
Even though the pinkette was very occupied at the moment, she thought that getting away from Miku might help her straighten out her thoughts. "I reckon I could go, I'd just have to talk to my manager first. How long do you think we'd stay for?"
"A week." Luka had been expecting a couple of days, three at the most and the thought of being without Miku for that long scared her. But she rationalized that going all the way to England for two days wasn't really worth it, and that a week was really the minimum time they should spent there.
Even though she didn't want to leave the tealette, she knew she had to; she knew it was for the best. "That seems… acceptable. Is there anything else you need?"
The ahodged girl smiled cheekily. "Yes. I wanted to know how it went with Miku. Judging by your expression, it looks like things went pretty bad."
The pinkette sighed and cursed herself for being tricked by the redhead's word games. However, she decided that it might be a good idea to get an outsider's perspective- a second opinion on her tricky situation. "It wasn't bad per se; it's just that I feel bad about what happened."
Miki observed her cousin's pained expression and guessed that she must have done something to screw up their friendship. "Why do you feel bad? What did you do?" She inquired as the pinkette took a seat beside her.
Luka took a shaky breath, preparing herself to recount the story. "Well… after the movie I took her home and I tried being a little bold by kissing her on the cheek." Luka started and was prompted to continue by the ahodged girl. "But then… then she was upset that it wasn't proper and she asked me to kiss her on the lips."
Miki's mouth formed into a little o shape in surprise. "You didn't, did you?" She asked incredulously, guessing that Miku might have been joking and Luka didn't realize, subsequently ruining their relationship.
Luka nodded. "Eventually. She asked me to pretend with her and after she dismissed all my worries, I couldn't say no to the golden opportunity I'd been waiting for since I met her…"
Miki had so many questions, and so what came out of her mouth was a hodgepodge of various inquires that made no sense at all. Luka decided to just continue, thinking that she could answer her cousin's questions as she went along. "At first, it was just a little kiss, very chaste and innocent. I thought she'd be satisfied seeing as she only wanted an 'experience', seeing as we were only meant to be pretending but then she almost begged for more. She seemed to be enjoying herself and I couldn't help myself; I sort of lost control and I think I went a bit overboard."
"Well, why are you upset then?" Miki confusedly asked.
Luka broke down in tears, feeling terrible for her actions even though the tealette had enjoyed them. "Because I took advantage of the situation… I took advantage of her. She gave me a little window of opportunity and I couldn't control my desires." Luka buried her face into her hands and sobbed lightly, causing Miki to promptly scoot over to comfort her. "I stole her first kiss; I took what wasn't mine to take. I cheated her and used her curiosity to fulfill my perverse desires."
"Hey, shh. Your desires aren't perverse, it's normal to feel the way you do about the one you love." The shorter girl pointed out.
"Yeah, but that makes it even worse. I can't love Miku, not in a world that doesn't accept me and what I am." She sounded disgusted with herself as she spoke.
Miki picked up on this, and was incredibly angry that was how society worked these days. "Don't talk like that. So what if you're gay, it doesn't change who you are; you're still the same Luka."
"I know but… it's not fair on Miku for me to pursue her. I'm the only one she has, and I'm taking advantage of the feelings she has for me. I can't make her like me just so we can be together, I can't taint her; ruin her life just so I can be happy."
Miki wrapped her distressed cousin up in a tight hug, hoping to calm the pinkette down. "You're not tainted; don't think of yourself like that. Just because people don't like homosexuality, it doesn't mean it's wrong. Loving another girl is still love; it's no different than love between a man and a woman." Miki rationalized, trying to justify the part of the pinkette that she was deeply ashamed of. "And besides, from what you tell me, Miku likes you. If she asked to kiss you then maybe she was gay already.
Luka shook her head defiantly. "What are the chances of that, it's obvious that I've influenced her somehow, corrupted her. I'm her best friend and she had no-one else, it's only natural for her to become attached to me, especially as I'm always slipping, always trying to indulge in my sick little fantasy." Miki tried to dismiss Luka's dreadful thoughts, but was interrupted by the pinkette. "I should forget about a relationship with her, before it's too late, before everything is ruined."
"But Luka, you love her." Miki reminded the pinkette. "I've never heard you talk more passionately about anyone, I've never seen you smile as brightly as when your with her."
"It… it doesn't matter. I can f-forget about her, I can deal with the pain as long as I know that Miku is safe. As long as Miku is happy, then I guess I can be too."
Miki considered arguing further, but what Luka was saying did kind of make sense. Miki could understand Luka's fears as she knew of all the hardship she had been through; hardship that Luka obviously didn't want to relive, or put Miku through. The cousins stayed together until late into the night, with Luka crying for most off it, crestfallen that she could never be with the one she loved, furious with her stupid morals that stopped her from advancing and livid with her parents that made her so scared of what she was.
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Miku turned to face the glowing red numbers of the digital clock on her bedside table. "One in the morning." She muttered unbelievingly. Miku had worked on her lyrics for the best part of two hours and had gotten some pretty potent stuff down on paper. She attributed this surge of inspiration to the kiss, knowing that it had stirred something deep within her; brought out a side of herself she never knew she had.
While that something had initially been useful, seeing as it let her get some emotive themes and ideas out as well as a few solid lines of lyrics, it was now acting as quite the hindrance. She had been aroused ever since the first second that their lips connected, and her arousal had only been growing exponentially over the course of the evening. She lay in bed, and she couldn't stop herself from imaging what Luka would look like naked, she imagined what her moans would sound like and what her skin would taste like, all things that Miku had never even dared to think about before.
Miku had known that she was probably in love with the pinkette and she would only use the word probably because she didn't really know what love felt like. But Miku's love had been based on how Luka made her feel, how nice of a person the pinkette was; how she was always there for her, always making her happy. But after the kiss, Miku's view changed. She realized not only did she love the pink haired woman, but she also lusted for her. She knew that the pinkette was incredibly beautiful and most men would kill to even speak to her, but Miku never really factored that into the equation before. She realized that she was insanely attracted to Luka, not just emotionally, but physically as well; the kiss had awoken feelings that she never even knew she had, that she never even knew she could feel.
Her daydreams had quickly morphed from cutesy ones to more explicit ones. She had previously only ever thought about kissing the pinkette, but now she was imagining what it would be like to make love with her, what her tongue would feel like as it explored her skin, or what it would feel like to have Luka's fingers deep inside her.
Her state of perpetual arousal was extremely frustrating and Miku only knew of one way to fix it. "No." She muttered into the dark room as her brain told her what needed to be done if she were to quell her hunger for the pinkette. "I-I can't."
Miku felt disgusted for thinking of pleasuring herself with nothing but Luka present in her mind, but it really did seem like the only option to the tealette, that or get no sleep at all. Miku fought with herself, knowing it was what she needed, but also knowing that she would feel terrible afterwards.
After another thirty minutes of flustered tossing and turning, Miku really couldn't take it much longer. She succumbed to her urges but told herself to avoid thinking of the pinkette, lest she feel guilty when she had finished. She let her hand travel into her underwear and she began stroking the slippery flesh lightly, gasping at the welcome contact. Miku was still rather inexperienced when it came to pleasuring herself, attributing it to that fact that she had only ever done it five times. As she awkwardly entered a finger inside herself she realized that three out of those five times had been in the last two weeks, and that without even knowing, as she had been doing it, thoughts of Luka had slipped in, albeit not a lewd as the ones of the present.
Miku felt even guiltier that she had been unknowingly pleasuring herself whilst thinking of Luka and pulled her hand away abruptly, feeling too guilty to continue. But the stimulation from her lone digit and from her brain was too much already and she was aching for a release. She reluctantly re-entered and quickly got back up to speed as thoughts of Luka invaded her brain.
Miku imagined that she was back on the sofa, back when Luka was returning her kiss hungrily. However, this time, instead of Luka stopping, she just carried on like she said she might have done. Miku pictured herself being carried to her bedroom and being hastily stripped of her clothes as she did the same to the pink haired woman. She once again imagined what the pinkette's naked body would look like, what if would feel like pressed up against hers.
She inserted another finger and quickened up the pace as in her fantasy, Luka climbed on top of her and mimicked her real life actions. She imagined that it was Luka who was fingering her as she held her close; she imagined herself drowning into the other woman as Luka brought her to her peak.
Miku climaxed faster than she ever had before and savoured the moment of pure pleasure, knowing that in a few seconds, guilt would consume her. She got up to wash the sticky sin from her fingers, not looking up at the mirror; not wanting to see the sick, perverted monster she had become. She fell back against the warm mattress and buried her head in the pillow, hiding her guilty tears. Miku thought her pent up arousal had been hard to deal with, but it was nothing compared to the soul consuming guilt that replaced it.
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Luka had seriously considered not going into work that day. Not only would it have allowed her to try and get some more sleep, it would also mean that she could avoid an awkward encounter with Miku. But she knew she would have to face the tealette eventually, so there was no point in putting it off and worrying about it. She took solace that today was Sunday and so she wouldn't have to take a car journey in obstinate silence with the tealette.
Luka had arrived at Crypton rather early. She had been up for most of the night; getting a few minutes of sleep here and there, and so she got up an hour early than usual, seeing no point in just wallowing in bed. She was heading for hers and Miku's shared room when she came across the senior Vocaloid couple- Meiko and Kaito. "Whoa, what happened to you, did you go drinking last night?" The brunette asked when she saw the state her old friend was in.
Luka blushed at Meiko's comment. She knew she looked bad, but she had hoped the make-up she put on would have concealed it. "Of course not, you know I don't drink. I just had a… rough night, that's all."
"A rough night?" She thought to herself, and almost instantly the perverted part of her brain interpreted 'rough' in completely the wrong way. She wanted to know all the details, but couldn't let her blue haired boyfriend know of Miku and Luka's escapades. "Kaito, do you think you could give me and Luka some privacy?"
The blue haired man pouted. "But… weren't we gonna go record our duet?" He asked a little disappointedly.
"We will, I just need to talk to Luka for a few minutes." She said very reassuringly and gave him a light kiss on the cheek.
Kaito was about to interject, but he quickly realized that without Meiko, he could get into his ice cream without the brunette intervening. "Well… I'm not too happy about it, but I guess I can just do something else." He tried to play it cool, even though he was ready to speed of to Meiko's office and get into the stash she kept locked away from him. "I have a few things that need attending to anyway."
Meiko smiled, already knowing that her blue haired fool would go straight for the delicious dairy treats that were secure in her office's fridge. "Thanks sweetie." She gave him a quick kiss and he power walked down the corridor. "So, what did you two get up to last night?" She asked with a coy grin.
"I don't really want to talk about it." Luka said quietly.
"Aww, c'mon." Meiko begged, pouting as she did so. "Please."
"God dammit." Luka thought to herself. "She's just as persistent as Miki." Luka sighed, before resigning herself to repeating her tale. "Fine, but can we go somewhere else; somewhere a little more private?"
The brunette smiled to herself, thinking she was going to get some juicy details. "Uh yeah, although we can't go to my office, Kaito's probably in there already." She laughed to herself as she remembered how much her boyfriend loved ice cream. "Why don't we go to the break room, no one will disturb us in there."
Luka followed the brunette to the deserted break room, and she sat down on one of the many chairs. "What are you doing?" She asked when she saw Meiko rummaging around in the fridge.
After moving an entire shelf around, Meiko found the small bottle she was looking for. "Sake." She simply stated, taking a swig before sitting across from her high school companion.
"Jeez, this early in the morning?" Luka questioned incredulously and Meiko just nodded her head.
The brunette emptied the small bottle to show that even though the hour was early, she could defiantly handle her alcohol. "Last night…?"
Luka nodded as she brought the shamefully pleasant memories into the present. "Well, everything was going fine; we had a great time at the movies and Miku really seemed to be enjoying herself. But when I took her home… well… she…" Luka trailed off, uncertain about whether or not she should continue with her story.
Meiko's grin only grew at Luka's shy behaviour, thinking that the tealette must have made a move. "She did what?" She questioned giddily, eyes glittering, as she was barely able to contain her excitement.
Luka continued to hedge, but she knew that Meiko would be relentless. She decided that she might as well come out with the complete and honest truth. "She asked me to kiss her."
The brunette jumped out of her seat, ecstatic that the two lovebirds seemed to be together. "You did, didn't you?" She asked just to make sure.
The pinkette nodded. "We did." She replied solemnly, which put a stop to giddy woman's premature celebrations.
Meiko stared down at the pink haired woman, who had her head hung low. "What's the matter, why aren't you happy. Was she a bad kisser or something?" She joked.
"No, the kiss was amazing, she was amazing." Luka replied instinctively, and ashamedly blushed shortly after.
Meiko had intended on asking if they had sex, but seeing as the pinkette seemed rather depressed, she guessed that it didn't happen. "Did you go any further?" She asked as a way of a compromise.
Luka shook her head. "No, not really. We went into her apartment and we kissed on the sofa, but I stopped myself before I fully lost control." Luka revealed
Meiko's eyes widened at what the pinkette had said. "What do you mean you stopped, I thought you wanted her?"
"I do; there's nothing I want more than to be with her. But it's not right, especially when we were only 'pretending'."
The brunette's surprise shifted to annoyance, and quickly into anger. "What the hell? Why did you break it up? If she asked you to kiss her then she obviously wants you too. She wouldn't want to kiss someone she had no feelings for." She pointed out.
Luka felt like crying again, but she willed herself to stay strong and transformed her depression into an angry outburst. "She doesn't have feelings for me; she was just trying it out, just experimenting!" She almost yelled. "And I'm the one using her curiosity to my advantage. It's not fair on her…"
Meiko could see that Luka was clearly dismayed and frustrated, and felt bad for raising her voice at her. "Hey, shh, calm down." She said in hushed tones, trying to bring the heaving woman back to a stable state. "What are you talking about, what advantage?"
"I took advantage of her curiosity." Luka repeated, but it still didn't seem obvious to Meiko as to what Luka meant. "Miku has had nobody her entire life, and so it's only natural that she wants the things she missed out on."
"But, if she was enjoying it as well, which I'm assuming she was seeing as you managed to get past the kiss at the door, then why on earth would you stop?" Her voice got progressively louder as she progressed through her sentence. "If you both liked it then what's the hell is the problem?"
"My problem is that we're both women!" Luka shouted before collapsing on the table, where the tears started to fall. "It doesn't matter if she was enjoying it because it's wrong. She shouldn't have been enjoying it and I shouldn't have even done it."
Meiko quickly realized what Luka had last night, but thought the complete opposite. "It's not wrong, just because you're the same sex it doesn't make anything 'wrong'." Meiko hated how homosexuality was so unapproved, hating how people were almost scared of it. She especially loathed that Luka classified it as wrong, when in her eyes it seemed more natural than a heterosexual relationship. "Your love for her is stronger than anything I've ever seen before. And by the way she is with you, the way you are together, I'd say that she has got some pretty powerful feelings for you too."
Luka's head shot up, and gazed at Meiko with questioning, almost pleading eyes. "That's what makes it even worse! I've already contaminated her; my advances and focused attention has already started to turn her." She slammed her fist weakly on to the hard table top in a futile attempt to realize her rage, her anger with herself. "I have to stop before it's too late, before she becomes like me!"
"Don't talk about yourself like that." Meiko scolded, hating the way Luka looked at herself as if she was a worthless piece of dirt, just because of her preferences. "So what if she becomes gay, at least she'll have someone who's crazily in love with her, someone who will care for her. She rationalized.
"But it's not fair on her. She could lose everything she's worked so hard for. She would lose all her fans, all her money." Luka pointed out, and Meiko nodded as she acknowledged the risks. "I need to back off, keep my distance before that possibility becomes a reality. I can't let her endure all the pain I went through just so I can be with her."
Meiko watched as her poor friend sob into her hands and felt a pang of guilt. She didn't know that Luka was so upset, but she was annoyed with herself that she didn't pick up on how Luka was thinking, annoyed that she kept pushing the conversation along even though the pinkette seemed distressed. "Oh Luka, I'm so sorry." She whispered, pulling up a chair and sitting close to the teary woman. "I didn't know, I thought… I'm sorry."
Luka shook her head defiantly. "It's not fault, don't worry. It's my stupid parents who are to blame. They let me see how disgusting I am, how wrong my feelings are." She muttered in a self-loathing manner.
Meiko swung her legs to the side so that she could move in closer to the broken pinkette. She hugged her cautiously, but was slightly relieved when she felt the pinkette grip back. "You are not disgusting." She said sternly as her grip tightened with her anger, anger towards the pinkette's parents. "What did they do to you?"
The questioned had been rhetorical, but Luka decided that she might as well tell her, it's not like she could get any more upset at this point anyway. "Do you really want to know?"
"Er… I…" Meiko hedged, not being able to formulate an answer. She however realized that Luka had never actually told her the details of her ordeal, just that she had been kicked out, and so she was slightly interested, if not a little concerned about the pinkette's past. "I guess. As long as you're okay telling me of course."
Luka conjured up the dark thoughts that she had tried locking away so many times, but always managed to come back to haunt her. "Well, it was Friday; the Friday that we… you know…" Luka stopped, not really wanting to think of what she did with the brunette when she was sitting right next to her.
Meiko nodded sheepishly as she too took her mind back all those years. "Yeah… I remember."
"Anyway… after I left your place, I went home with the intention of telling them about us seeing as things had gotten pretty serious. I came in and sat them down, before telling them that I was a lesbian and that I was already seeing someone." Luka revealed. "As you can probably guess, I didn't get as far as telling them about you."
"Yeah, I kinda figured. If you had told them then I'd probably be in as much mess as you right now."
"I'm glad I didn't, 'cause I wouldn't wish what happened to me on anyone, let alone my girlfriend at the time." She smiled sweetly at the brunette, and could read her thanks on her features. She breathed in heavily, as she prepared the recount of her encounter, taking a while to compose herself. "After that though, everything just went to hell. I tried to explain but they were having none of it. My father… he took his belt off… he started to hit me with it."
"Oh Luka, I'm so sorry." Meiko felt atrocious knowing that Luka had received a beating because of her. Little did she know, what Luka had said so far had been the pleasant part.
"He had only used his belt a few times; only when I had done something really bad, and even then it was only a few smacks. This time however, he didn't relent. He just kept hitting me, striking at every piece of skin, calling me the devil while so. I tried pleading with him to stop, but he was furious, he couldn't contain himself."
Meiko had a few tears running from her eyes at Luka's tale. "That's terrible, didn't your mother stop him."
"As if. She just stood there shouting the same insults that he was, saying that I shouldn't be allowed to live for my sins, that I had been corrupted by Satan, and needed to be beaten to taught a lesson." Luka shivered as she remembered the horrific events of that evening, especially the ones that followed. "When it seemed like the belt wasn't enough, he… he resorted to using his fists, striking me in the stomach, the chest and even the face a few times." By now Luka had water flowing down her cheeks, as she sobbed in between sentences. "After what seemed like an eternity, I was finally thrown out into the street where I got a respite from the abuse, but was left to endure the freezing cold night while I bled in the alleyway."
"Please, stop!" Meiko cried as she latched onto the disheveled pinkette. "I can't take it anymore." Luka took a few minutes to cry on the brunette's shoulder, thankful that the worst of her story was over. "How did they get away with that, why didn't you call the police?" Meiko asked through strained sobs as she imagined her past girlfriend being savaged by her own father.
"Like they'd have helped me." The pink haired woman scoffed. "Everyone was so scared of people like me back then that my parents probably would have gotten a medal for their efforts."
Meiko recalled the mass disgust with homosexuals back then, understanding that, while Luka may have been exaggerating, the police probably would have refused to protect her once they found out she was gay. "W-what happened after that then?" She inquired fearfully, hoping dearly that Luka didn't suffer any more than she had already.
"I lived on the streets for days, doing whatever I could just to get food." Luka admitted. "I had to wait until Monday when they would both go to work. Once the house was empty, I snuck in and packed as many of my belongings as I could. I took my savings and headed straight for the airport where I took a one-way flight to England."
"That's terrible, it's despicable. No one should have to take that, especially not from their own parents." A furious brunette whispered, still holding the other woman close.
Luka nodded in agreement "Now you must surely understand that I don't want Miku to suffer the same fate. If it means that I can't be with her then… then that's just the price I'll have to pay." Luka started crying heavily when she understood that her fantasy had come to its end, when she realized that no matter how much she loved Miku, she knew it was for the best that she stopped acting on it. "With any luck, my feelings for her will pass. Maybe one day, friendship will be enough."
Meiko held the pinkette close and rocked her gently as she broke down in her arms. Even though she knew that Miku and Luka were perfect for each other, and that they both had strong feelings for each other, she could definitely see the risks. And while Luka only had to deal with her parents' disapproval, Miku would have to deal with the world's. "Maybe…" She whispered comfortingly, trying to give the pinkette hope, trying to cheer her up.
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After a relatively sleepless night, the tealette groggily wandered into Crypton and went straight to the room where she and Luka worked. She was surprised that she didn't see the pinkette, but was relieved that she'd have some time to think on her own. She got herself a bottle of water and sat on the large, comfortable sofa and began to wonder what the pinkette would think if she found out about her actions the previous night.
Disgusted? Appalled? Try sickened, perhaps.
These were the words that the tealette came up with and she mentally slapped herself for letting her body take over; letting her urges control her. Miku felt sick for exploiting Luka's kind nature, appalled that she would use Luka's friendly gesture to fulfill her strange desires.
What made it worse for Miku was that she felt as if she had forced the pinkette to kiss her. Luka had had so many objections that it was obvious to Miku that the other woman didn't want to do it. "Of course she wouldn't, she's not a lesbian…" She muttered to herself, talking back to the voice in her head. "She's too perfect; a woman as beautiful as her could never be gay." She surmised, thinking that a woman as refined and as elegant as Luka didn't fit the image of what a lesbian should be, or at least what Miku thought they should be.
Miku went back to the guilt she felt, and she hated herself for actually going through with it. She was utterly disgusted that she actually imagined what it would be like to have sex with her best friend; the woman that had shown her nothing but affection and care. Sadly, those qualities had only fuelled Miku's desires. She tried to rationalize as to why she did it, but she could only come up with one answer. "I love her; just the thought of her makes me go crazy." She said into the vast emptiness of the expansive room.
Just at that moment, Miku heard the door open and she heard the silky soft of voice of the pinkette penetrate the silent air. She blushed, thinking that Luka might have heard her, and so just sunk into the sofa, trying to hide herself.
Luka was just saying her goodbyes to the brunette, who had also broken down at the sight of her friend. They hugged for a long time at the door, with Luka doing more comforting than Meiko. This was because the brunette felt horrible and entirely at fault for the despicable events that occurred all those years ago; she felt responsible for causing Luka so much pain.
Luka nervously walked and shut the door softly behind her. "Miku?" She called out weakly, partly because she was still emotional from recalling her story, but mostly because she was afraid to face the tealette.
Miku's heart raced, as her guilt came back in full force. She was scared to look over at the pinkette, worried about how Luka was felling after their kiss last night. "Y-yeah." She meekly turned her head and in an instant all her current fears had vanished, only to be replaced by new worries. "Luka? Are you alright, what happened?" She asked when she saw the running mascara that Luka hadn't cleaned off entirely. Without having to think about it, Miku leapt up and sprinted to the pinkette, hugging her incredibly tightly.
Luka knew she was meant to be keeping her distance; trying to forget about her make-believe relationship with the tealette, but just the sight of Miku made her heart flutter and told the rational part of her brain to just shut the hell up. Luka returned to teal haired girl's embrace with just as much feeling, holding the petite body against her own and basking in Miku's presence. After everything she had been through over the past 12 hours, Luka needed this hug more than anything, and despite her brain reprimanding her; reminding her of just how dangerous this was, Luka didn't care in the slightest. She nuzzled her nose in Miku's hair and inhaled deeply, using the tealette's familiar scent to calm her down, to help her relax after everything she'd been through.
"What happened to me…?" She worriedly asked remembering that Miku didn't look quite herself before she latched onto her. "I'm more concerned about you. Are you okay?" the dark circles and bags under the tealette's eye told Luka that something was up.
Miku nodded hastily, causing Luka to shiver when her nose brushed against her neck. "I'm fine; I didn't get a lot of sleep, there's no need to worry." She said as cheerily as possible, not wanting Luka to worry about her anymore. "What about you, you look like you've been crying; you've got mascara all down your cheeks."
Luka knew she couldn't tell her the real reason, so she offered a half-truth to the tealette. "Me and Meiko just got a little nostalgic. W-we were just talking about some old stuff and I stated c-crying a little."
Miku could tell that Luka was lying, but seeing as whatever she was trying to cover up made her emotional, Miku didn't really want to bring it back up and make Luka uncomfortable. "Oh… okay. You're alright now aren't you?"
Luka found Miku's inquiry adorable. Her concerned tone of voice and the way she gripped on tighter were the cutest things ever. "Now that I'm with you, everything's perfect." Luka eyes widened when she heard the words she had instinctively blurted, quickly realizing how inappropriate they might sound. She waited anxiously to see how the shorter girl would respond.
The tealette smiled against Luka's neck. "You're so sweet Luka." She blissfully whispered, snuggling deeper into their warm embrace. As Miku melted into the older woman she forgot all her troubling thoughts, she forgot how bad she felt for doing what she did or how weird it was to ask Luka for a kiss. Luka obviously had no objections to their kiss judging by her hug, which was more needy and beautiful than ever. Miku felt right in the pinkette's embrace, she felt as the two of them were the only people in the world, and that nothing else mattered but them.
The pinkette gripped at the tealette desperately, wanting nothing more than to stay with her like this until the end of time. She quickly forgot all thoughts of how she took advantage of Miku, and could see that she was obviously fine with what they did last night judging by the closeness of their hug. Surely Miku would feel weird hugging if Luka's advances last night had been too much, and Luka reveled in this knowledge. Her anxious grip softened, giving way to a loving embrace that while she knew she shouldn't be indulging in, she carried on regardless, letting herself be drawn in by the immensely powerful bond she shared with the tealette.
Pink and teal stayed connected for almost ten whole minutes, losing themselves in the comfort and security that the other woman provided. Neither one of them wanted to break the embrace seeing as they were delighted that none of the awkwardness, they had been expecting was there. If anything their kiss had only made their friendship stronger, and they reveled in the knowledge that everything was still great between them.
"Do you think we should get to work?" Luka asked slowly, sounding as if she was about ready to fall asleep as she did so.
Miku let out a slightly whiney mewl at the taller woman's suggestion. "We probably should, but I'm more than happy to stay like this with you." Miku offered as she snuggled deeper, half hoping that Luka would agree to that as well.
"Me too." She replied in a whisper, once again losing herself in the soothing scent of the girl she wished she was allowed to love. "But won't we get in trouble; we've hardly worked on our song since Matsumoto-san suggested it."
Miku reluctantly detached from the pinkette when she remembered her lyrics. "Maybe you haven't, but I have." She said a little teasingly. She grabbed Luka's hand and their fingers intertwined instinctively. "Your kiss really inspired me; I got quite a lot done last night. Do you want to see what I've got so far?"
Luka blushed at the mention of their kiss. "S-sure, why not." She answered embarrassedly. Luka had imagined that the feelings of anger and self-loathing would have resurfaced when their kiss was mentioned again, but she felt nothing of the sort. She just felt a little embarrassed and almost proud that she motivated the tealette.
Miku smiled beatifically before pulling Luka over to the seating area and pulling out a few sheets of paper from her bag. "It's just some themes, and the other sheet had a few lines of lyrics." She explained as she handed the pinkette her work. "It's still a work in progress, and if you don't like anything we can always change it."
Teal orbs scanned across the slightly crumpled pieces of paper and Luka grinned at all the little doodles she had done. She looked at the scrawled out brainstorm, which was the main focus point, and her eyes widened when she saw some of the words. Much to Luka's surprise, a lot of the words were similar to the ones she had wanted to contribute, but had been too afraid to say; too afraid of what Miku might think if she got too intense. "Wow. I thought you'd have been more… cutesy." She honestly stated.
"Well, I was kind of thinking like that to begin with. But our song is about love, Not just emotional, but physical too. And I thought that because it was forbidden that maybe… maybe it would amplify the normal feelings, it would make our love more intense."
The pink tinge returned to Luka's face when she heard the tealette speak, it sounded as if she was talking for real. Luka couldn't bring herself to correct the tealette as she indulged further into her fantasy, unable to resist, finding the tealette talking about them being in love was like music too her ears. "I guess, it makes it more exciting, more… taboo." She offered, and waited to see how the shorter girl would react.
"Exactly, that was what I was going for." Miku agreed, finding it surprising that Luka was on the same wavelength, especially considering she wrote everything while suppressing her lust for the pink haired woman.
Pink and teal eventually got to work seriously, and seeing as Miku had been so forward, so open with her lyrics, Luka felt the need to remove some of her own censorship, and speak from her heart for the first time.
o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o
The day had been interesting to say the least. Not only had Luka formulated a basic piano melody, but with the less restrictive censorship brought about by Miku's lyrical ideas, both Miku and Luka found themselves blushing a lot more often as they would occasionally slip up, going off on an passionate tangent, before quickly realizing what they had been saying.
The kiss had come up a few times, but never really in any detail; it was mentioned but promptly skipped over, or at least it was until Miku decided to bring the subject up directly. "Um Luka?" Miku managed in a whisper after a long silence caused when she had rambled on excitedly about how inspirational their kiss was. "About what happened yesterday…" The nervous tealette started when she noticed the pinkette was looking a tad uncomfortable.
Luka heard the tone in her student's voice, and the indulgent bliss of the day melted away in an instant. She heard the scared whispers, and just knew that Miku had regretted what they did last night, and had put up a façade to be polite. "Miku, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have been so rash, it's not my place… I should've… I'm sorry." Luka butt in with rushed apologies.
Miku was quite befuddled. She had intended on apologizing herself, and hadn't expected the pinkette would have anything to be sorry about. "Whoa, calm down. What are you saying sorry for?"
Luka looked up from the floor with questioning eyes. "For taking your first kiss, for taking it so far." Luka pointed out, having thought her point would be obvious to the tealette.
Miku smiled sheepishly. "But I asked you to. You have nothing to be sorry I about, I wanted everything that you gave me." She reassured softly, but quickly realized that 'want' might not have been the best word to use, seeing as Luka thought she was only pretending. "I mean… I needed everything you gave me." She offered in clarification, but if anything, it just came out worse. "I mean, I needed it for inspiration, you know… motivation…" The tealette trailed off embarrassedly before circling back round to her original point. "Anyway… I was just going to apologize for making you uncomfortable. I'm sorry that I pushed for so much; it must have so weird for you. I'm sorry I forced you."
Luka's eyes widened; she was shocked to hear that the perpetuation of the kiss wasn't one sided, shocked to learn that Miku was actively pushing for more. Luka knew Miku had been responding, but that's all she thought it was, just a response to the new and pleasurable sensations. But it turned out that Miku was driving the kiss forward as well as Luka, and this revelation shocked the pinkette.
Luka then realized that she hadn't answered back and that Miku still had her head hung in shame. She instinctively spoke to remedy the situation. "I wasn't uncomfortable in the slightest." She blurted, making the shorter girl crane her neck upwards. "It wasn't weird; I was just a little… confused with how fast things were going."
Blood sped through Miku's veins faster and faster as the pinkette spoke. Not only was Miku relieved to hear that she hadn't sexually assaulted her best friend, but that Luka seemed okay with their actions. "I-I sort of lost control, sorry." She offered sheepishly.
"Hey, there's no need to be sorry." Luka reprimanded playfully. "It's completely understandable, I got a bit carried away too- I guess it's natural to." The two women sat in silence, finding it a bit odd that it wasn't awkward to talk about their kiss. They were both pleasantly surprised and somewhat relived when they heard the other's views, and it put both their brain's at ease.
They started to get back to work, but their efforts only lasted a few seconds. They stopped when they heard the rush of employees outside their door, indicating that it was five o'clock and the end of the working day. "It's five already." Luka whined, looking at her watch for confirmation. "The day went so quickly."
Miku could tell that the pinkette was a little annoyed. "Don't worry; we can do it all again tomorrow." She stated joyfully, hoping to brighten the taller woman up.
"Tomorrow." Luka face palmed as she remembered her plans. "I'm not gonna be here tomorrow, I'm going to visit my aunt."
A noticeable frown formed on the tealette's features. "That sucks, won't you be here even for a little while?" She questioned hopefully.
The taller woman shook her head. "Unfortunately I won't be. I'm going away for a whole week." She revealed much to Miku's displeasure.
"W-what?" Miku inquired gloomily. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"Miki only told me last night and I guess I just forgot, I was having too much fun to remember." The taller woman offered to cheer the depressed teal haired girl up
The tealette broke down instantly, and latched herself to Luka as she let a river of tears spill from her eyes. "That's not fair. How can I go a whole week without you?" she asked through tears.
Luka was regretting her rash decision, and wished that she could stay. "I'm gonna miss you too." She offered futilely as she pulled Miku across her lap, cradling her as she cried. "I'm sorry Miku." She whispered into her ear, hating that she had made her cry.
The tears were unrelenting, and Miku held on to Luka for dear life. "I can't go on without you; I need you." She snuggled deeply into the other woman, letting her hair be stroked softly. "I'm gonna miss you so much. Your hugs, your voice, your smell."
"My smell?" Luka inquired amusedly, her brow arching up with curiosity.
Without answering, Miku buried her face in the soft pink locks and inhaled deeply. "Yeah, it's so comforting, so reassuring, and so soothing." She offered as an explanation for her somewhat odd behaviour. Blushing all the while.
Luka just smiled at Miku's cute actions and continued stoking her back until she had calmed down. She walked with the unhappy girl to the door and took her by the shoulders. "Well, I've got to go now. I guess I'll see you in a week."
Miku nodded as she wiped a few tears from her eyes. A sudden thought flashed into her mind, and without thinking about it for a second, Miku decided that she absolutely needed to do it. She desperately pressed her lips to Luka's, staying there only a few seconds before tearing them away embarrassedly. "Sorry, I d-don't know what came over m-me. I… I… I'm just gonna miss you so much, I wanted…" Miku started, once again franticly trying to explain her extremely strange behaviour.
Luka knew that she should reprimand Miku for her actions but she just couldn't find it in herself to do so. She also knew exactly what she wanted, and as dangerous as that want might be, Luka didn't care anymore. Ever since she disconnected from Miku's lips last night she had been craving more; she needed to taste the tealette again. So even with the inherent risks involved, Luka brought her hand up to Miku's cheek, cupping it softly. "Shh." She whispered, silencing the babbling young woman in an instant.
Her brain was screaming at her to stop, but her attraction to Miku is just too strong to ignore, too strong to fight. What's more, a week without Miku is going to be torture and so Luka rationalizes that one kiss can't hurt; one more little dip into her fantasy, one more moment of indulgent is necessary to get her through the week. Ever so slowly Luka closes the distance, and tenderly connects with the tealette.
This kiss isn't hungry and lustful like last night, nor is it chaste and rushed like the one she just received from Miku. Instead, it's slow, but still sensual. It's gentle, but still passionate.
"I'm in heaven." Miku thought to herself as the one and only thing she had wanted since last night had finally been granted to her. She reveled in that way Luka held her close; so firmly yet so warmly. She lost herself in the feel of Luka's lips gently toying with her own and savoured the moment while it lasts.
After a good thirty seconds the two women mutually separated, and instinctively rested their foreheads together. "I miss you already." Luka said at barely audible level, causing the tealette to blush at the subtle double meaning.
They shared one last hug before Luka left for her plane, leaving Miku to stare blankly at the spot that pinkette occupied moments ago, forced to contemplate as to why Luka wasn't repulsed when she kissed her, or why Luka's kissed her back willingly. "Does she like me?" she whispered into the heated air of the room.
o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o
Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed it. And don't worry, Miku and Luka will be together eventually, but it will be a good few chapters yet.
Seeing as I got some extremely positive feedback for my new story, I decided that I'd go ahead and start writing ASAP. I was gonna say that my new story would be out this time next week, but seeing as it'll take a little more time for each chapter to be beta read, it might come out a few days later, although hopefully not too long.