I only own my own creativity...

While writing my next gen fic I realized that I was basically donw eith this chapter but I had not posted it. Sorry for the delay.

Chapter 6 Hands

Somewhat inspired by Hands by Jewel. Enjoy

James did see her at breakfast the next morning but he frowned when he saw who was next to her. It was Caradoc Dearborn, a fellow member of the Order and she was blushing at something he said.

"Looks like you have competition James," Peter said when he noticed why his friend had stopped in the middle of the Great Hall. He tugged on James sleeve so that he would sit down rather then keep staring at Lily and Caradoc awkwardly drawing attention to himself.

"What do you mean?" asked Sirius who had just overheard the last part. He followed James' line of vision and saw what Peter had been referring to. "Do you really believe Lily will go out with him?" Sirius asked turning back to his friends. Peter shrugged.

"Not sure, but I noticed him watching her at the last few meetings. Of course he was not the only one." James finally turned away and started eating his breakfast. He looked up to see Sirius watching him. Remus sat down next to Sirius and noted the odd looks each friend had on their faces.

"Why is James glaring at Sirius?" Remus inquired after a beat. James' flickered back down to his plate but Sirius kept staring.

"Because Sirius is watching him like he is a bomb that could explode any moment." James growled as he played with his breakfast.

"I think Sirius is concerned since Lily being noticed by other guys." Peter nodded towards the other side of the table where Caradoc was still talking with her.

"And you are watching him because?" Remus turned towards Sirius.

"A watched pot never boils so if I watch James he will not do anything stupid." Even James laughed at Sirius' thinking which is what he intended really in the first place.

"I am fine Sirius." James reassured, "If Lily does not like me than what should stop her from going out with other guys?" Peter's eyes grew at James' question.

"If I did not know better I would say that it sounds like you are getting over our favorite red head." Remus mused. James shrugged his shoulders but kept playing with his food.

"Maybe he finally decided she isn't worth it." Peter offered trying to draw James out. James looked down the table once more towards Lily and shook his head.

"No, Pete she would be worth it if she liked me. Maybe I am just starting to see that she will never see me the way I want her to." James stood up and walked out of the Great Hall.

"Well, he took that better than I thought he would." Sirius commented as he snatched a pastry and then they all left.

A few weeks later Lily and James were working in their common room on their Head duties. Lily looked up from their work and finally asked the question that had been nagging her for over a week now.

"Would you hex Caradoc if I went with him to Hogsmeade?" When she saw James' expression she quickly started talking again before he could. "I know that you really have hexed anyone in a while and you only do pranks that are harmless now but the thought has been bugging me all week." She explained hoping that it would take away some of the hurt of the question. James went back to working on what he had been writing before.

"Why would I care if you go with Dearborn to Hogsmeade?" James said once he felt like he had calmed down.

"Well, first there is the fact that you have repeatedly asked me out," Lily said as she held up one finger.

"Yes, well maybe I finally got the message." James interrupted her list of reasons. "Besides if you are not going to say yes to me, why should I stop you from going out with someone else? Lily smiled sadly, reached over and covered his hand with hers. She gave his hand a squeeze but was still surprised when he flipped his hand over and squeezed back. He looked up again this time looking at her straight in the eyes."Do not worry about me and my school boy crush Lily. Worry is wasteful and useless in times like these. The war will get a lot more worse before it gets better."

"You sure have grown up James." She smiled warmly at him.

James really did not have much to worry about Caradoc. Lily did go to Hogsmeade with him but after that Caradoc went back to his usual seat during meals. There was much whispering on what had caused the change. Some speculated that James went back to his old ways and threatened him into no longer seeing Lily. Others decided that Lily was the one to blame though no one could agree on the why. Only Caradoc and Lily actually knew. The date had been nice for the both of them. However, when they kissed near the end of the date it was very clear to both of them them was really no chemistry between them. They both agreed that they should go their separate ways rather than dragging out the inevitable. So since guys usually do not talk about that sort of thing and Lily was not the type to kiss and tell no one else had a clue as to why the two were no longer spending time together. Though, one thing good thing that came out of all this was the change in the relationship between the Head Boy and Girl. Which is what Lily was thinking of when James caught her smiling during patrols.

"What are you to thinking about?" He asked then laughed when she jumped at the sound of his voice. She avoided the subject though not wanting to encourage him to pursue her.

"Shouldn't you be somewhere else?" She mused when she noticed the bright light shinning through the window ahead of them. He gave her a curious look out of the corner of his eye.

"Where else would I be?" She shook her head laughing softly.

"Do you really think I could that close to Remus and not figure it out?" He frowned down at her.

"I am not sure I know what you are referring to." He said trying to dodge her question.

"Oh come on James, maybe everyone else believes that Remus' furry problem is about a rabbit but not me. Of course, I am not the only one who knows. I am sure you know that Severus..." She stopped when she saw his face turned white and his fists clenched. She waited while he recovered.

"How long have you known? Did Remus tell you or was it Snape?" He asked once he had calmed down however he still spat out Snape's name like it was the most disgusting taste in his mouth.

"Remus told me but only after I asked him back at the beginning of fifth year. I wouldn't have asked but I figured if we volunteered for certain nights no one would suspect him being missing from patrols."She smiled, "It was only after I gave that reasoning that he told me. Though it was even harder to convince him that I did not mind. He mumbled something about how I was the fourth student to continue being his friend. I imagine you three must have figured it out much sooner since you are close friends and share a room." She smiled shyly up at him. He relaxed visibly and smiled back at her.

"We figured it out in second year. Wait," the smile turned into a frown, "What did you mean by having somewhere else to be?" James stopped walking so that he could see her face. Remus would have told them if someone else knew their secret. Besides Remus would never do something like that. Though James would have thought that Remus would have told him that Lily knew his secret. She shrugged at his question.

"Well, I am not too sure what happens but I do know that you disappear around the same time as Remus..." James cut her off.

"You have no clue as to what we do but you are not freaking out about it?" He stared at her as if he watched long enough he would understand her, "Most people would be concern about others who might be sneaking off with a werewolf or in your case the rules that we are breaking." Lily looked out the window again at the full moon.

"Well, whatever it is it has to be safe to some degree otherwise Remus would not allow it." She turned back to him, "Besides, who do you think takes care of him when you guys are sleeping? I help out in the infirmary because of my ability in potions and once Remus admitted that I knew they let me help out." She looked forward then started walking again and James fell in step with her wanting to hear more. "We talk sometimes and he let it slip one time that you somehow help him during the full moon. Even talk about you sometimes." she said peering at him out of the corner of her eye with her head slightly turned towards him. "I do not expect you to tell me all your secrets James. I just wanted to let you know you do not have to stay here with me. I know you want to be with Remus."

"It is okay. Remus knows why I will be late and he is fine with it. He thinks it shows that I am growing up. Either way Sirius has a way of contacting me if they need my help. So I can do both."

"Well at least now you will not have to lie to me or make up excuses when you need to be there for your friends."

"To the you the truth I was really worried about you figuring out something. I think of you as a friend so I trust you but it is not just my live that this affects. I am glad that you can be there for Remus while we sleep it off. Peter is good in potions as you know so he usually gives us all something to help us recover but it knocks us out..." James trailed off when he realized he might be saying too much but Lily let it go. Knowing he trusted her was enough for her though she could not say why it meant so much to her. All she knew was that the last hour of patrolling passed quickly and she had to tell herself not to worry when he left her at the front doors. She turned and headed back to their rooms. She pulled out her wand at the sound of running feet but before she could turn two long arms wrapped around her.

"Thank you Lily." He whispered in her ear and then he was gone again.