EPISODE VI- THE REAL THREAT
Intro"Ah'm gonna catch 'im," Gwen told herself as she lay hidden in the bushes of the forest. "Ah'm gonna catch dat endangered weasel 'an save da village from destruction!"
While the harvest sprites had devised a similar plan to catch the endangered swallowtail butterfly, things had not quite worked in their favor in the end. Jack III perceived that he had saved his friends by destroying the evil creature that terrorized the small sprites, yet the REAL threat to the sprites had yet to be seen or heard from. They would never see it coming: the endangered weasel of doom.
A rustling came from a plantation of bushes down the happy path, and Gwen readied herself to catch her prey. She knew that while she needed it to stay in the village, she also needed to make sure it was protected from those who would be afraid of it. She was the only one who could do this.
The rustling became quicker and something could now be seen emerging from the greenery ahead.
"Now I've got… huh?" Gwen peered harder at the animal ahead. "Is that a harvest sprite?"
Indeed, she had come to capture an animal that was said not to exist, but little did she know that she would soon find another.
Nac was out for his morning stroll through the forest, marching happily to a tune in his tiny little head and completely oblivious to the girl hiding in the bushes ahead of him. Gwen slowly stood up then, revealing herself to the sprite and attempting not to frighten him as she did so. Nac was terrified, however.
"A blonde! They're the worst kind!" Nac shut his eyes tightly, too afraid to run.
"Please don't be afraid, I ain't gonna hurt ya. Ah jus' wanna talk," Gwen smiled warmly.
Nac opened, his eyes to see her. It was clear she was telling the truth, for she was within range to trample him. "Oh…okay,"
"So harvest sprites DO exist!" Gwen laughed happily. "Wow, dat izuh supprahz!"
"Huh?" Nac stared in confusion. This girl talked funny.
"Acshley, ah could use yer help ketchin' something dat could save the town," Gwen went on.
Nac immediately livened up. That was HIS goal, and he was happy that he may be of service to solving the problem. "I can help!" Nac piped.
"Good, good! Ah wuz countin' on ya, m'boy," Gwen put out her hand. "Name's Gwen, animal lova extraordinaire. Put 'er there,"
Nac shook her hand enthusiastically. "I'm Nac, the middle child of the village's harvest sprites, in service of the harvest goddess herself!"
"Impressive," Gwen commented. "Of how many siblin's?"
"Initially…30745. But I live with the eldest brother, Nic, and the youngest, Flak. I'm also what they call the 'runt'."
ROAR!
Out of nowhere, a large beast appeared and swallowed the tiny sprite whole. Gwen stared in terror into the eyes of the evil weasel of doom, and then the beast ran off.
"Aw no! He gone 'n ate Nap! Ah gotsta fand Nip n' Flap!"
Act 1"Have you seen Nac anywhere today?" Nic asked his youngest brother, Flak, as the two aided Jack III in the planting of more crops.
"Nope," Flak replied flatly.
"Okay," he ignored the situation completely and continued planting seeds.
"Aha!" Gwen emerged from behind the three unaware planters.
"Oh no! We've been discovered!" Nic panicked.
"What do we do!" Flak covered his eyes with his hands.
"The only thing we can do," Nic stared the tall blonde girl in the eyes. "Jack, you have to kill her for us so that our secret existence can remain unknown to the inhabitants of this village!"
Jack III went right on burying the seeds, not realizing that Gwen had even appeared on the scene.
"Ehem," Nic cleared his throat and slapped Flak in the back of the head.
"Ouch… oh, right!" Flak remembered and turned to tap Jack III on the shoulder.
Jack III became quickly annoyed at this and poked Flak back harshly in the forehead, knocking him on his bottom.
"I can't get up!" the overweight sprite rolled on his back helplessly.
"Clearly, this isn't gonna work," Nic decided. "Alright girlie, what do you want with us?"
"Ah seen yer bro been eaten by uh dog gone weasel!" Gwen explained.
"… Okay… in English, please,"
"Ah said that ah seen yer…"
Blonde hottie! Jack III finally realized Gwen was standing behind him and hugged her tightly in greeting.
"Uh, hullo… Ya not hearin' us talkin' before?" Gwen was trapped in his bear hug.
Jack III unclasped his grip on his body reluctantly, but maintained his friendly smile.
"He's, um…" Nic thought. "Just really busy with getting the farm back into shape is all,"
"Ah see. Well, 'un. We need ta go rescue that Nappy fella,"
"Nappy?"
"Wuz it Nat? Mebe it wuz Nash…" she tried to remember.
"Nac! What happened to him?!" Nic wailed.
"Ah said it before, he been eaten!"
"Ahhhhhhh!!!!!!!!" the sprites cried.
"Ah said ah told ya's before," she stomped her foot angrily.
"What ate him?" Nic demanded to know.
"A damned weasel! The endangered one that can save the homeland!" she waved her hands in the air with exasperation.
Jack III stared at her in contemplation, This girl is a terrible dancer. Ugh.
"That thing has been terrorizing sprites for too long!" Nic yelled out. "It's time we slay that evil creature!"
"What?!" Gwen squealed. "Yer eggs in uh waste basket!"
"I what?"
"Yer outta yer mind!" she clarified. "That beast is the only damn thang that we can use ta save the town!"
"I don't care! I'd rather live in the middle of a loud and crazy carnival for the rest of my days than have to deal with that thing any longer! He ATE Nac, for crying out loud!" Nic really did have a point here. The weasel was too dangerous to keep around for the sprites.
"Aw horse poop. You small fellers can do what ya like, but me an' Jack here are gonna catch 'im first and use him to save the town," Gwen grabbed Jack III by the arm forcefully.
Wow, the girls in this town are real easy, Jack III winked at his little friends in secrecy. He was sure they got the message.
"Fine!" Nic screamed at her.
To Jack III, the little sprite suddenly seemed angry. Poor guy, he's probably just a little bit jealous. Wait, I have an idea…he left suddenly and disappeared inside the barn.
"Jack?" Gwen called after him.
"Your voice pitch is too high and annoying for him to hear you!" Nic spat.
"Why you, I oughtta squash you like a bug!"
"At least I don't look like one!"
"Or mebe ah'll feed ya ta the weasel like yer brother!"
"Noooo!" Flak cried from further away.
Jack III returned then with a small little female lawn gnome. There, go to town, little buddy, he set it down before the sprite and walked off hooking arms with Gwen.
Nic stared at it a moment, "I really just don't get that guy,"
Act 2Later that day, Gwen and Jack III had recruited the help of the local crazed inventor, Louis, and the three had set off to find the endangered weasel.
At the very same time, Nic and Flak were seeking the guidance of the harvest goddess herself.
"Hey, how'd this magic sponge get in the pond…?" Nic wondered.
"Oh no! She could have been trapped in her dimension for days," Flak stared with eyes wide open.
"Yep… oh well. Nothing we can do about it right now. We're on a mission!" Nic concluded. With that, they were off to search out the endangered weasel and seek vengeance for their fallen brother.
Meanwhile, Louis babbled on endlessly about his new invention, a contraption that he hoped would catch the endangered weasel without the hastle of tracking the animal first. "Yes, the 'C-429WT' will catch the weasel no problem. All's I gotta do is flip this switch rght here, and it will sound off an alarm that no one but the beast himself can hear. He'll come straight to us!"
"What's C-429WT stand for?" Gwen blinked skeptically.
"Well, the WT obviously stands for 'Weasel Trap'," Louis smiled.
"An' the C-429?"
"You don't wanna know."
With that, he flipped the switch an a high pitch sound apparently had gone off. They waited. And waited. And waited…
"Nope, this one definitely didn't work," Louis flipped the switch off and on again.
"Will it work now?" Gwen asked.
"I'm not sure, the pitch becomes lower and lower each time I turn it on."
"How many tones does yer thingy ma bobber have?"
Louis shot her a tantalizing look.
"FOUR-HUNDRED AND TWENTY-NINE TIMES!?" Gwen raged.
"I told you, you didn't want to know."
Louis flipped the switch off and on again, this time they two heard the sound loud and clear. Too loud, in fact, and they fell to the ground in sheer pain from the pressure on their eardrums.
"I think the weasel can hear sound at the same level we can!" Louis yelled to her.
"WHAT!?" Gwen could no longer hear a thing.
"What?"
They both looked up at Jack III who was looking at them in confusion, You two frighten much too easily.
"Jack, you must have an amazingly resistant sense of hearing," Louis said. "You press the switch this time, we'll cover our ears," he pointed to the contraption.
Jack III looked to where Louis was pointing. He walked over and examined it closer. He had no clue why this man was pointing to the item.
"Press it!" they instructed. Jack III still couldn't understand. They unplugged their ears to show him what to do, but then it clicked in his mind what they wanted him to do.
Crazy guy flipped this thingy a bunch of times, so that must be what they want me to do. Jack III flipped it without warning, again and again and again, sending off a torrent of unbearably deafening sounds through the forest, and knocking his poor companions to the ground once more in a state of shock. Guys? He turned to find them on the ground shaking wildly. You are BOTH terrible dancers.
"Ahhhhhh!" the two sprites whizzed by in a fury past Jack III and the two shocked hunters. "The weasel is gonna eat us!"
Jack III stared at them, unimpressed with their rude intrusion. The sprites stopped running and turned to him. It was obvious that he had no clue what was happening.
"C'mon, Jack! It's right behind us!" Flak yelled.
Jack III turned to where the sprite was pointing. He was still very confused.
"At least, he was there…" Flak scratched his head. The sprites then carefully stepped back to where they had come from, Jack III followed closely out of curiosity. Eventually they came upon the weasel, laying on the ground in the same state of shock that both Gwen and Louis were now in.
Nic turned to Jack III, "No problems, I'll take it from here!"
Jack III raised an eyebrow. Perhaps they had been playing a game with the beast. Which brought him to the thought of his own dog, who was sitting at the farm all alone. Perhaps it was time he got back and played with him for a bit, for a day out with Gwen did not turn out at all like he had hoped. On that note, he left.
"Time to destroy it!" Nic laughed.
"But… what if he's the only way to save the village?" Flak cried.
"MmmmMMmmm!" a mumbling came from the weasel.
"Uh… true," Nic looked at the weasel oddly. "Perhaps if we put him in a cage or something…"
"MMMMMMM!"
"What the hell is that sound?!" Nic yelled. He listened closely to the animal's side, the sound was definitely coming from the belly of the beast.
"What do you think it is?" Flak wondered.
"I think it's Nac! He's still alive in there!" Nic announced.
"How do you know that?"
"Nothing else is quite so annoying, except maybe you. Help me cut this thing open."
Conclusion"You say you saw 'real' harvest sprites?" Katie asked Gwen in astonishment.
"What?"
"I said you say…"
"Speak up, ah can't hear ya!" Gwen growled.
"How can't you hear me? I'm speaking louder than you are."
"…Huh?"
"Gwen, quit being a nitwit!" Katie yelled in anger.
Gwen could not hear anything but muffled sounds, perhaps her hearing was permanently lost. "LOUDER!" she roared.
"I SAID QUIT BEING AN ANNOYING LITTLE WHORE AND ANSWER ME!!!" Katie raged in frustration.
"… 'Kay ah almost heard it that time, just a bit louder,"
"Rrrgh!" Katie did not know how to deal with this taunting girl.
Now Gwen realized what had happened. "Aw, nah! That damned Jackie boy seems ta have damaged ma ear thang!"
"You… you were with Jack?" Katie was now drawing tears.
"What?"
SLAP!
"I hate you! You know I'm in love with him and you went behind my back to be with him! I HATE YOU, GWEN!" Katie stormed off.
"Nah, girl! Real 'uns! I saw 'em with ma own two eyes!"
Summer the 13thNac iznt ded! Yay!
Gwen told us tat the weezl ayt him and it wuz troo but then we opind up the weezl and ther wuz Nac! I wundr if we ken stil yooz the weezl too sav the taoon?
THE END(So in celebration of HMTV season 2's 2000th hit here at I have posted a new commentary chapter for it. One thing I left out: EveKaren's grandmother? You decide. If no, then whatever. If yes, then Jack II and Karen are cousins, and that was quite unintentional on my part lol).