Fill My Lungs With Sweetness

Hermione could hear the two young men chatting companionably outside her room on the couches. She snapped out of her head-space when Draco's attention had shifted from her to the knock on the door. How does he manage to manipulate me this way? Why do I keep being so easily seduced? I can't trust myself around him! Her mind reeled at their latest exploit as she paced the length of her room. She couldn't understand how compliant she became at his simplest commands. Hermione had never been one to bow down, to heed command without reason, or regress in such an intimate way. The war had truly taken its toll on her, causing her to fall back into herself. Everything about her had changed. She couldn't find it in her heart to be the bossy know-it-all everyone knew her as. She had a different lease on life and its fragility. She didn't want to constantly be in control anymore and desperately wanted someone to take the reins in her life. Hermione wanted to accept the things around her and live in the present, not the future.

Still fervently pacing her room, Hermione allowed herself to think about her past. She recalled feeling alone in her youth, before she received her letter to Hogwarts. Her parents had always been busy working, leaving Hermione with a Nanny, and only seeing her on weekends. She loved her parents dearly and they had grown much closer in recent years, but she couldn't shake the idea that she never felt secure around them, like they would leave at without a moment's notice. Hogwarts was just as much a home to her as it was to Harry and the other lost children. The neglect from her parents was what caused her to try so hard at excelling academically in school. She didn't care about standing out anymore; she didn't care about the attention. Hermione kept pacing, remembering the events of the war. She, Harry, and Ron had spent almost a year in the search for Horcruxes and after believing Harry was dead during the final battle a lot of things had fallen into perspective. While perfect marks at school were still important to her, she couldn't assuage the overwhelming feeling of needing to find love. Not just any love, but true love. Love that would make her heart feel once more. She needed a love that she could rely on, be secure in, could trust, and have the utmost faith in, a love worth sacrificing for. She had never wanted anything so badly.

After weeks of avoiding thoughts of Malfoy, Hermione finally acknowledged her feelings. He made her furious. She never once had thoughts of killing anyone, but some days she imagined strangling him just to make him shut up. She hated the way he left a mess of his books, the way he wore his hair, the irritated twinge in his voice when he had to remind her of something, the way he looked at her, his silence, and the way his shirts fit so snugly at his broad shoulders. She stopped in her tracks. Who am I kidding? Draco is the first person to make me feel safe. Regardless of how he taunted and belittled her, he was there. He rescued her when she fell and hurt herself, he kept her from tripping in class, he was the perfect Head Boy, and always reminded her when they had duties. It's not much, but it's something, I suppose. Hermione considered how much Malfoy had changed since the war. No longer was he the pesky and condescending boy who tormented her, tried to have Hagrid fired, or made all of their lives miserable. He seemed older and wiser, like there was the weight of responsibility on his shoulders. How have his 'opinions changed'? And why?

Draco felt his stomach rumble as Blaise suggested Quidditch maneuvers for the game that weekend. They sat for about five minutes before Draco heard Hermione's door open. It took all of him not to look. Instead, he tried harder to focus on Blaise until he heard the portrait close with Hermione's departure. He visibly relaxed and it didn't escape Blaise's notice.

"Tense, Draco?" Blaise said curiously and Draco sighed while putting his face in his palms. Blaise knew his best friend was struggling with something. "Alright, let's hear it," he said.

Draco considered not confiding in his friend, but realized his chest felt far heavier than its usual depressing weight.

"She's different," he started. Blaise listened, untroubled. Draco began explaining his complicated relationship with Hermione without sparing any details. Once he was finished, Blaise was nodded understandingly.

"It sounds like you two have something serious brewing," Blaise said.

"How can we?" Draco retorted, failing to see any future between him and Hermione.

"Have you even talked to her about it?" Blaise asked carefully, not wanting to upset his friend.

"Of course I have, it just didn't get very far." Draco explained, seeing as Blaise's arrival interrupted their last escapade.

"You know pure-blood standards are basically nonexistent now, right?" Blaise reminded him. There was an entire war due to those beliefs. Now more than ever Draco appreciated Blaise's unbiased opinion.

"Tell that to my father," Draco sneered, cursing the imprisoned man silently.

"But can you see yourself with her?" Blaise questioned him. To this, Draco had no answer.

The noise in the Great Hall was loud as Hermione entered and found her friends already seated for dinner. Ginny was ranting about her potions class with Professor Slughorn that afternoon to Harry as Hermione greeted them and quickly added food to her plate. She heard someone clear their throat. Hermione looked up and saw it was Ron. She stared at him, waiting for him to speak.

"I...you...uhm..." he looked at Harry for encouragement. "I was wondering if I could speak with you after dinner, in private," he said. She nodded at him slowly and then began ravishing her dinner. What could he have to say now? She ate hurriedly and wondered, keeping to herself during the meal. She saw Ron watching her as she finished and rose to leave with him following in her wake. Leading him to her dormitory, Hermione was careful not to let the portrait slam closed again. Draco and Blaise had taken dinner in their common room and were still at the table eating when she and Ron entered. Hermione could tell Draco was surprised that Ron was with her and the three boys sent nasty looks to each other. She ignored them while guiding Ron to her room and shut the door behind them.

Ron examined Hermione's room closely before turning to speak. "I owe you an apology," he blurted out. Here we go. Hermione merely nodded and waited for him to continue. "When you said that I had never actually asked you to be my girlfriend, I thought you meant that you didn't want to be." He said looking at her searchingly. "I didn't realize you meant that you wanted to be," he went on, gaining confidence. Hermione's expression was changing from amused to concerned. Ron you idiot! You've completely misunderstood!

"Lavender was just kind of there, you know. But now I realize what you meant and I'm here to ask you what I should have before." Ron was smiling now. She raised her hands in attempt to gain his attention.

"Ron, I think you're getting a bit ahead of yourself here," she tried telling him.

"I know I made a mistake 'Mione, but we belong together and I'll never let it happen again." He was grinning like an moron now, convinced Hermione wouldn't refuse him.

"Ron, we do not belong together. I don't want to be with you. I didn't want to be with you before, but you just assumed and I didn't have the heart to tell you otherwise." He was looking confused.

"How can you say that?" he said without sounding like he actually cared what she meant.

"I'm sorry," she started, but was interrupted by an increasingly dauntless Ron. "Hermione, you don't mean that. I know you're in love with me, it's so obvious."

Hermione's jaw dropped at his presumption. "No, Ronald. I'm not in love with you, nor will I ever be. You are not the kind of person I imagine having a future with." She was boiling now.

"Mione puh-leeease," he scoffed as if every single person on earth was in love with him as he brushed hair from his face.

"I'm serious!" she cried out in disbelief. He actually believes he's flawless! Pre-war Ron was never this arrogant!

"Sure you are, I'll give you time to think about my offer." He started to leave, but Hermione blocked his path.

"Don't you dare think that I would want to be with you when you don't even have the guts to apologize to me properly!" she said in his face. Some friend he is. Where is the Ron I used to know?

"I apologized in my own good time, which should be enough." He told her, crossing his arms.

"No, it is not enough Ronald! Your behavior is atrocious and we will never be anything more than friends!" He was glaring suspiciously at her now.

"You're just playing hard to get, 'Mione. But that's fine." He started laughing.

Hermione had heard enough. "Out! Get out!" she yelled and grabbed his shirt to pull him to the door. Ron was trying to say something but Hermione slammed the door in his face.

The argument from Hermione's room did not fall on deaf ears. Draco and Blaise sat listening to the entire conversation. They laughed and made faces at each other mocking Ron's conceitedness. Even Blaise, who barely knew Hermione, could even tell she wasn't interested in Ron.

Draco was initially shocked seeing Hermione leading the Weasel into their common room. He felt instantly envious, wanting to grab Hermione and lock her in his room to keep for himself. Instead, he sat and tried to ignore the stabs of jealousy at the boy being guided to her room. It wasn't long before raised voices made their way to the kitchen area. Draco chuckled with pride when Hermione told off Ron and kicked him out.

The look on Ron's face after the door slammed close was priceless. He wheeled around to look at Draco and Blaise who were openly laughing at him and stalked out of the dorm. Blaise took this as his cue to leave as well and wished his friend good luck before exiting. It took Draco a moment to drag up the courage and knock on Hermione's door. He didn't get a response, but opened the door and found Hermione sitting in her armchair by the fire.

"Hermione," he said, choosing not to call her by her last name anymore. "Yes?" she asked plainly, still watching the fire. I should have planned what to say! "We have patrols in a bit," he said feeling stupid. He had totally forgotten what he wanted to say to her or why he thought it a good idea to come to her room.

"What's going on between us?" she asked unexpectedly. He didn't know how to immediately respond. "I need answers," she told him, finally turning and looking into his eyes. "We'll talk about it after patrols," he said suggested calmly and retreated from her room.

Draco wasn't sure where to begin digging into his feelings towards Hermione. He told her they'd talk after patrols because it was the first thing he could think of at the spur of the moment. He wanted to decide where he stood and how much he was willing to share with her. He knew he'd have a lot of explaining to do and wanted to prepare himself. All he fully understood was that he enjoyed being around her. That will have to be enough. They patrolled silently, per usual, but Draco could tell Hermione was buzzing with questions.

When they returned to the dormitory, Hermione made a bee line for the couch and plopped down, leaving Malfoy to follow. He stood and watched her before she spoke. "I'm ready if you are," she said.

Draco felt she might mean something deeper with those words. "Ask away," he told her and her face scrunched up as if she was expecting more of a fight from him.

"Well," she began seeming much shyer now. "We've done some things…" she trailed off.

"Things," Draco agreed, stifling a smile.

"I just...I don't understand why you'd do those things with…me." Her cheeks were reddening.

Here goes nothing.

"I guess I've always admired you, but living in close quarters made me more aware of it." He tried to make this comment lightly, but he saw the wheels in Hermione's brain churning.

"You mean to tell me that you tormented me for years because you admired me?" she questioned half amused.

"I suppose you could say something along those lines." Draco never enjoyed giving out information like this. He dreaded her next questions.

"I thought my blood status made me too low for noticing," she drawled, waiting for his response.

"My opinions have changed," he repeated himself from earlier and added, "No one believes in that junk anymore." He tried in vain not to be annoyed at the interrogation. Can't she just take it for what it is? He knew the million dollar question was on the tip of her tongue.

"When did it change?" she asked carefully, sensing his agitation. Draco looked as if he wished she had asked anything else.

"The night you fell off your bed," he said softly, looking around the common room.

Hermione didn't realize how seriously that night rattled Draco's long taught beliefs. She was taken aback. "What?" she said and Draco sighed dramatically while sitting on the couch beside her.

"I was always raised to believe a muggle-born's blood was actually dirty, as if there was literally mud in their veins that caused them to be unclean. Your blood was the first I'd seen up close that proved otherwise. It's not dirty, not at all." He didn't want to look at her, ashamed of his ignorance. Draco felt a hand touch his forearm and raised his eyes. Hermione was looking at him with compassion and forgiveness. The sight alone was enough to make Draco's heart tighten painfully.

"I still have nightmares of when my aunt tortured you." He told her, he deeply regretted not stopping Bellatrix, but there wasn't anything he could do that wouldn't put his family in danger as well. Draco felt Hermione's hand withdraw and expected the worst. "I still have nightmares about it too," she confessed quietly.

Draco felt awful. "I should have stopped her, I should have done something, anything," he said passionately, willing himself not to get emotional. He was taught long ago that showing emotion meant showing weakness.

"There's nothing you could've done, Draco." she said trying to comfort him. He couldn't comprehend how understanding she was being and felt overwhelmingly guilty.

"Stop looking at me like I make the sun shine," he snapped. "I'm a terrible person."

Hermione laughed. "No, you're not. You did what you had to in order to keep your family safe. I did the same." She said. Draco never thought of Hermione's parents and he knew nothing about them other than their lack of magical talent. Before he could ask what she meant, she blurted out, "I had to erase their memories, before the war. I had to keep them safe. I was just lucky I found them. And even luckier they forgave me."

Draco could tell this was vexing her and mutely listened as Hermione told him how she obliviated their memories to forget they had a daughter and sent them to live in Australia. "It wasn't much of a difference," she added lastly.

"What do you mean?" Draco spoke finally.

"I've never had much of a relationship with my parents. They're both dentists, you see. They tend to people's teeth and were constantly busy with work. They were home on the weekends, but one of them was always gone tending to emergencies."

He could tell this was the first time Hermione had made such an admission and wondered what her best friends knew about her home life. "Harry knows, he understands. I never bothered telling Ron." She told him, seeing the look on his face. "They left me with a Nanny during the week. Her name was Patricia Jenkins. I loved her dearly but she died three years ago."

Draco wasn't sure what to think. Hermione's childhood was much like his own. "I'm sorry for your loss," he muttered and Hermione nodded. She had shared so much with him, he felt obligated to share too.

"My parents were basically the same," he confided and Hermione embraced her turn to listen, turning towards him and adjusting herself on the couch.

"Father was always doing business and Mother was always entertaining guests. They left me with tutors, mostly. Father was constantly telling me what a Malfoy does and doesn't do, while Mother halfheartedly showered me with gifts. They never paid me any attention." Draco could see the sympathetic look in her eyes. She knew all too well what it was like. "I've been raised from an early age to overtake the family business. No time for play. But I'm rather good at it." Hermione was curious about the Malfoy business.

"What does your business do?" she asked. "Trading, contracting, selling and buying stocks, and investments. We dabble in a bit of everything." A smile crossed his face momentarily before remembering instructive letters from his father.

Neither Hermione nor Draco knew what to say next. Their confessions hung in the air threatening to make or break their relationship.

"I like it." Hermione said randomly and Draco wasn't sure to what she was referring. "When we do those…things." She admitted softly.

Draco's heart lurched. She likes it? He was unsure of what to say.

"I mean, unless you don't…" she continued, sounding nervous.

He shook his head before she could speak again. "I wouldn't do them if I didn't like it." He told her, resisting the urge to lean over and kiss the confused wrinkles from her brow.

"I just…I've never…I don't know what happens now," she professed. Draco wanted to chuckle. "You could let me be your Daddy," he suggested, careful to watch her expression. He could read her like a book.

"What does that even mean?" she giggled, but didn't dismiss the idea. "It just means that you let me take care of you. Let me protect you. Trust me and I'll keep you safe. I won't judge your passions. You can run around acting like a little girl all day, I won't mind in the slightest. And in turn, you do anything I ask without hesitation."

Hermione seemed to consider this. "So I give you complete control," she stated, sounding interested.

"Yes," he said simply. "And we'll have rules you'll be expected to follow. If you don't follow them, you'll be punished." The idea of rules and punishments made Hermione's nipples tighten. She loved the idea of having the structure he was suggesting.

"I don't want anyone to know, we have an image to uphold. My friends might not take it lightly." She told him.

"If anything, a Slytherin and Gryffindor coming together will only encourage house unity, don't you think? But I can see why you wouldn't want the Weasel finding out." Draco was laughing now, recalling the earlier argument. Hermione swatted at him but he caught her by the waist and dragged her to him and set her nimbly on his lap. Hermione relaxed as his arms encircled her and she reveled in his scent.

"You smell incredible," she said and he squeezed her tighter without responding.

They both knew it was a long enough conversation for one night. After a few moments, Draco tilted Hermione's head back. He wanted to look into her eyes.

She stared up at him innocently before he pressed his lips softly to hers. Hermione felt her body tingle, his hands were cupping her face and she could hardly breathe. His lips were soft and inviting as she slowly complied, allowing his tongue entrance and meeting with her own. She only opened her mouth slightly, but Draco's taste invaded her senses. She made little licks at his mouth and heard him groan. He abruptly stood, taking Hermione with him cradled in his arms and walked to her room and still kissing.

Breaking the kiss, Draco set her on her feet and looked at her again. "Change into your nightgown, sweetness." his voice sounded deep and husky, wanting to ready her for sleep. Hermione blinked once, went to her dresser, found the long t-shirt she recently purchased and glanced over her shoulder. He wants me to undress! She thought. Shivers went down her spine as she laid the nightgown over her bed and began to remove her pants. Draco's eyes glazed over when he saw the blue cotton panties she was wearing. Hermione hesitantly removed her shirt and sent a blushing glance to Draco before removing her brassiere. She stood naked save her underwear and Draco walked over to her.

"You're beautiful," he said as his hands grazed her arms and neck. No one has ever said that to me before. Draco's hands now caressed Hermione's hard nipples, sliding his thumbs deftly over the sensitive nubs. Her breath caught and Draco forced himself to stop. She was expecting more, wanting more. "It's your bedtime, little girl. We'll talk about rules tomorrow." Hermione looked at him imploringly and pulled the nightgown over her head.

"Do you want a bedtime story?" he asked, wanting to lay in bed with his darling angel.

"Yes!" she yelped and ran to find a book. Draco settled himself in her bed when she came bounding back and leapt onto him. He began reading The Little Mermaid to Hermione as she yawned and snuggled close to him with her bunny. It wasn't long until she was fast asleep and he had no desire to move, but he knew he needed to do right by her, so he left soundlessly into his own room. He fell asleep immediately after putting on her panties again.