Christian stared at the his bedroom ceiling. One arm lay above his hand, the other with his hand resting on his toned stomach. His bedroom drapes were opened, letting streams of moonlight in.
There was no way he'd be able to get any sleep after the day and night he had had. He sat up in the bed, his fists digging into the mattress. He rolled his neck, before letting out an exasperated sigh.
Why had she kissed him?
He hadn't minded, that wasn't the issue. It was more that now that she had kissed him, it was the only thing he could think about. It wasn't like Ana hadn't ever interested him before. As a growing teenager, it wasn't as if he hadn't noticed her. She was beautiful, she always had been. But she had lived with them, and frankly... after Elena... he couldn't think about much else.
He remembered the pang of jealousy he felt when she returned from her date with Jose. He wasn't sure at the time why he felt it considering there was nothing between him, but he realized now that perhaps he may have felt something for her at such a young age.
She was right. They had never gotten along. He envied her and her strength. Even now, after everything she had been through, she didn't seem half as messed up as he was. On top of it, he was jealous that Grace and Carrick would have someone else to look after. It had taken him a while to reach that conclusion, but he finally had.
Grace had been his angel. She had been the first thing he had seen at the age of four in the emergency room. She hadn't made him uncomfortable, and she made him feel safe. It had taken longer to warm up to both Elliot and Carrick, and even when Mia came along she was just a baby so he felt protective of her. But Ana had immediately enraptured everyone around him, even his grandparents. He wished that he had fit in that easily.
He felt off, and he knew part of it had to do with his lack of submissive's for the past six months. But he had given it up, the lifestyle. It had taken years, but he finally realized he wasn't getting what he wanted out of it anymore. He wasn't sure exactly what he wanted, but the women that he had weren't fulfilling anymore. Too many times they had declared their love for him, and he wouldn't reciprocate. He wondered vaguely if he should start going back to the club again...
Elena hadn't taken his realization lightly, and in fact, she still continued to try and send him women. He was becoming fed up with her more and more lately.
Christian stood and walked to his window, staring out at the bright lights of Seattle. He wondered what Ana would want to do the next day, and contemplated 'showing her the town'.
"Knock it off Grey.." He murmured to himself. He reminded himself that Ana wouldn't want him that way, and she needed to take time for her herself. Even after she kissed him, she looked like she was going to freak out.
He exited his bedroom, walking into his living space where his piano sat. The marble floors felt good on his bare feet. He sat at the piano letting his fingers drag along the keys. He wouldn't play, he didn't want to wake Ana.
The night had ended abruptly after the kiss, and Gail had shown Ana to the guest room. He hadn't seen her room at Carla's, but he assumed what he had to offer would be better than anything else.
Christian knew his family was more than happy to see her.
Flashback, Three Years Ago
"Hello Mother." Christian said he kissed Grace's cheek. In a rare moment, he had invited his parents to his condo to speak with them. Gail had even prepared dinner, which he knew would surprise them even more.
They had only ever eaten dinner at his apartment twice since he had purchased it.
"Father", they shook hands and he led them to the table.
The salads had already been placed out, a starter for the rest of the meal.
"Christian, is everything okay?" His father asked, looking even more confused as he was handed a glass of brandy.
"Yes, I needed to speak with you both about something and I figured why not also have dinner to make it a more... comfortable conversation."
They sat, and Christian cleared his throat. "As you know, my business is going very well."
"And we're very proud of you Christian." Grace said with a smile.
"Thank you mother. With the help of Ros, I've been able to invest a little more of time in something else."
"What's that?"
"Finding Ana."
His mother dropped her fork and it clinked on the salad dish. "What do you mean?"
"I mean that something is wrong. Ana loved you both, there would be no way that she wouldn't have contacted either of you since she left."
"Son, it's been years. We've tried to get a hold of Carla, she clearly doesn't want us speaking to her daughter."
"I understand that, but Ana is of age now. She has been.. Carla can't tell her not to contact you and I know that would have been the first thing she'd want. What else explains it?"
Grace and Carrick exchanged a look. "Your mother has felt guilty for years. Perhaps Ana hasn't contacted us because we didn't fight harder to keep her."
"There was nothing we could do.." Grace began crying, and Mrs. Jones immediately approached with tissues.
"Mother, i'm going to find her. I know Ana and I didn't... see eye to eye, but I know she would be back by now or at least called, or wrote unless there was something wrong. I mean, for fucks sake she could have e-mailed!"
"Christian!" His mother chided him for his language.
"We see your point son, but... why are you doing this? You're a businessman, new at it in fact no matter how successful you already are.."
Why was he doing this?
Present Day
Why did he do it? He had been asked by multiple family members and work colleagues, and he still was unable to give a satisfactory answer. He had convinced himself that it was because of his mother, that he just wanted her to be happy, but Christian knew it was something else as well.
He was broken from his thoughts at the sound of a cry. Immediately he jumped up and ran to the source: the guest bedroom. He heard another cry.
Christian swung the door open to see Ana thrashing in the bed.
"NO!" She cried, "Please, no! Don't hurt me! Please!"
She had nightmares. Just like him.
He jumped onto the bed, despite the fact that he was only in his black boxers briefs and grabbed her gently by the face, stroking her cheeks with his thumbs. She was covered in sweat.
"Ana... Ana baby, you're fine. No one's going to hurt you." Baby? "Ana.. come on, wake up. You're okay."
Slowly her eyes opened, and she yelled out in shock at seeing him above her.
"You were having a nightmare. You're okay." He continued to stroke her face.
She immediately began to cry, heaving sobs as she collapsed from the weight of the stress she was under.
"It's okay.." He murmured, laying the bed next to her and pulling her into his arms. Her face immediately fell onto his chest where she continued to cry and he froze, waiting for the panic to set in. It never did.
After he deep breath, he rubbed her back, letting her cry out every emotion she had.
"It's okay."
Flashback, The Day of Rays Funeral
This was his first funeral, and he hated it. Everyone was crying, it was raining, and his arm was hurting from holding the umbrella above Ana's head.
'That's what a gentleman does,' his father said, and so he did it.
Grace had told him he was too young, that he didn't need to go, but for some reason he felt the obligation. He had been mean to Ana, and she had just lost her dad, just as he had lost his birth mother.
He watched as she placed a white rose onto the casket. She then flung herself at it, wrapping her arms around the ornate box. Christian didn't know what came over him, but he dropped the umbrella and grabbed her.
She dropped her head on his chest and began to cry.
She was the first person to have ever touched his chest without him freaking out, and he had no idea why.
Present Day
Ana woke with a start, feeling warmer than usual. The source of the heat was to her left: Christian Grey.
Why am I in bed with Christian Grey? She thought in a panic. Yes, she had kissed him last night momentarily, but.. She paused, remembering vaguely her nightmare and him holding her as she cried.
She moved from him slowly and took a moment to openly stare at him. His body was the epitome of sexy with just the right amount of muscular. She stared at the happy trail that led down into his boxer briefs. And then stared at his... package, which was so very obvious beneath the fabric. She jumped as he began to stir and she turned away from him, hoping to at least make sure her face wasn't too puffy before he saw her.
"I must have feel asleep." She heard him say groggily. "What time is it... shit." She looked to see him standing quickly. He stretched, unashamed at his physical state. "I told my mother we'd meet her at noon. It's eleven, so we should get ready. Good morning by the way... how are you feeling?"
"I'm fine. Thank you." She blushed, suddenly embarrassed. "I'm sorry you had to see that last night."
"Don't be. I understand more than you think."
"So... about last night." Ana began, but Christian held up a hand, the other on the wheel of his Spyder.
"Don't. Don't make any of this more complicated than it should be." He said with a smile and she smiled with relief. He was already making it complicated enough in his head, he didn't need her thinking about it as well.
"I'm very nervous."
"I see this."
She looked beautiful in a pair of straight legged white jeans, and a blue blouse that complimented her eyes. However, she had been repeatedly either tugging on her lip with her teeth, or picking at the skin of her thumb.
"Ana..." He said as the car slowed in their driveway. "They're nervous too.."
Ana stared at the mansion she had called home once. It had been painted, a lighter shade than it was before. The landscaping was different, multiple flowering trees now in the yard, with flowered bushes on either side of the front door.
She felt her heart racing a million miles a minute as she stepped out of the car, and she immediately gravitated to Christian, her hand going into his. He didn't question it but seemed to understand.
"Do I knock... or?" She let out a small laugh looking at him as they approached the front door. He nodded for her to open it.
She grabbed the familiar ornate handle and turned it, her eyes closing as it clicked open.
She was home.
They stepped inside, and she could smell something amazing. She vaguely wondered if Linda was still their housekeeper.
"MOTHER!" Christian yelled, his voice echoing off of the empty foyer.
"Holy SHIT! ANA!" Ana turned her head to see Elliot barging towards her, wrapping her in a hug that she was sure would break her. He was more muscular and burly than she remembered him. Same blonde curls.
"Elliot!" She yelled excitedly and he kept her in a hug for a moment before letting go.
"Mia! Come downstairs!"
A squeal echoed and a beautiful woman came running down the stairs, her hair cut into a short stacked black bob.
"Mia?! Oh my gosh, you've grown!" The girls embraced, holding onto each other tightly until Ana felt Christian touch her arm lightly. She turned her head wiping her fresh tears to see the two people that had been in her mind for years.
Grace stood before her, holding both hands over her mouth in silence, as if unsure whether she was really there. Carrick stood beside her with a hand on her shoulder, steadying either himself or his wife.
Ana finally felt the biggest weight off of her shoulders the moment she was wrapped within their arms.
"This is.. literally a dream come true Son." Carrick said to Christian as Ana walked from person to person, crying and laughing.
Christian said nothing, but stared at the beautiful brunette.
"She's grown up. She looks beautiful." Carrick continued.
"Yes, she does." Christian allowed a small smile onto his face and his father raised a brow saying nothing.
"Kids," Carrick clapped his hands together, "Why don't we eat? Gretchen cooked us a wonderful lunch."
"Gretchen?" Ana asked, confused. "Where's Linda?"
"Oh she retired. She has multiple grandchildren now, so she's with them." Grace said, her arm around Ana's shoulders.
They sat, and Christian felt a pang of jealousy that she hadn't sat with him. Knock it off Grey, he scolded himself once more.
Ana felt content sitting at the table with her family. Just the morning before, she had never expected to even see them again and yet here they were.
Because of Christian.
He sat quietly in his seat, and Ana suddenly wished she had sat next to him. She owed everything to him.
"Are we missing someone?" She piped up, staring at the additional plate on the table.
"OH, my girlfriend. She should be here in a minute. You'll like her Ana." Elliot said looking at his wrist watch. As if on cue, a blonde woman stepped into the dining room, kissing both Carrick and Grace on the cheek. "Katie girl!"
She was a beautiful woman, her hair wavy and full and her bright eyes friendly. She was dressed to kill in a red top with black capris.
Realizing Ana was sitting next to Elliot and she have to move she stood, immediately coming face to face with the girl.
"Hi there." Kate smiled at her and began to move past her until her eyes lit up with understanding. "Oh my... you're Ana!"
"Katie girl, this is Ana. Ana, this is my Katie girl."
"Also known as just Kate." The blonde said, and though Ana lifted a hand to wave, she was swept up into a hug. "I have heard so much about you. We are going to be such good friends."
Ana immediately liked her. She looked around to see the only seat open to be the one next to Christian and she noticed the grin on his face as she sat there.
"Miss me?" He whispered to her, and she let out a small nervous laugh. Was he flirting with her?
"I would like to make a toast." Carrick stood, his glass raised. They all raised there's as well. "To Ana. We've missed you more than you know these past years, and there's nothing left to say except that we're so happy you're home." They went to cheers until he continued, "And also.. to Christian."
The family members turned their gaze on him, including Ana who stared at him with a warmth in her eyes.
"For using his resources, and time... to bring Ana back home. We'll forever be grateful."
"To Ana and Christian." The tabled chimed.
"To Christian." Ana repeated, before sipping her drink.
"So Mia, any boyfriend from Paris?" Ana asked.
"Hah. I wish!" Mia replied.
Mia's room was almost the same as it was when Ana had lived there. Her furniture was white as it always had been, the walls a pale pink. Her blankets, sheets... the frames in her room, all pink. The only difference in her room now, was the tons of pictures from Paris that she must have taken.
"What about you? Any boyfriends?" Mia asked back and Ana rolled her eyes.
"No. The last boy I dated was.. well, Jose Rodriguez."
"What?! That was like.. a million years ago Ana!"
"Trust me Mia, I wasn't able to date when I was gone."
Suddenly Kate's blonde head popped in the room. "Well, you and Christian look gorgeous together."
Ana jumped, and Mia laughed. "You'll get used to her doing that. She's a journalist.. she's nosy." She said looking at Kate fondly.
Kate winked and stepped back of the room as she heard Elliot yell for her. Ana looked after her, confused, standing with her arms crossed over her chest.
"Christian and I?" Ana scoffed, "No. First, he's like.. my adoptive parents.. son."
"Well, they didn't adopt you." Mia chimed in, "You said no, remember? You're more like the friend who came to stay the night but never left."
Ana nudged her arm, "I'd like to think I was more than that!"
"Well of course. But, Kate's right.. you do look gorgeous together. He's been looking at you since you've gotten here."
Ana flopped onto the bed, leaning back on the fluffy pink blanket. "Probably because he's waiting for me to have a psychotic breakdown." She mumbled.
"It was really bad, huh?" Mia asked softly sitting on the edge of the bed.
"Yeah."
"Well, you're back. Anything you want to do to get your mind off of it."
"I want to eat an ice cream sundae. I know that sounds silly.. but I haven't had one in seven years.."
"I'll make it happen!"
"Was this your idea?" Christian asked as Gretchen finished up the sundae bar, complete with caramel, chocolate syrup, sprinkles and cherries. Dinner had been finished over an hour ago, and they had been lounging outside by the fire pit, both Christian and his father with a glass of brandy.
Ana looked at him, and suddenly felt very shy thinking of what Kate had said. She shook it off and grinned. "I love ice cream sundaes. Plus, are you complaining?" She nudged him and he gave her a look that made her feel as if the ice cream would melt.
She noticed from the corner of her eye that Grace and Carrick looked at them with interest. Ana cleared her throat stepping away from him to fill her bowl.
They returned to their spots by the fire pit. Ana smiled at the sight of Kate under Elliot's arm. They looked good together. Christian, it seemed, purposely avoided sitting near her with his bowl and made it her heart sink for a moment.
"Thank you for sitting and meeting with us here Ana. I'd like to not go over your ordeal just yet, as I know was extremely traumatic." Carrick began. He sat in his office at his desk, both Christian and Ana sitting across from them.
Christian sat with ease in the leather chair, and Ana felt nervous with the serious atmosphere.
"Christian, Grace and I have all spoken and we'd like this to be easy, so please don't make it hard Ana." He handed her an envelope that felt heavy.
She shook it, it sounded like... money. She opened it, looking inside and gasping. She had never seen so many one hundred dollar bills. "Carrick I-"
"Ana, no! It doesn't matter the years that have gone by, Ray entrusted you to our care and even though you've just come back, we're going to honor his wishes. Now, I'd hope that you would go and open a bank account, and use that money to get yourself on your feet. Christian, go ahead."
Christian turned in his chair, looking at her. "Tomorrow morning I've arranged for us to go to a car dealer, and we're going to pick you up a car."
"No, I'm sorry but that's too much. I can take a bus, or a cab."
"Anastasia," Christian scolded, and she suddenly felt like a child. She furrowed her brow at him, "It's not safe for you to take a bus or a cab. Not to mention that most employers in this town will not hire you if you have no car. I also have a friend that I've contacted today that is interesting in meeting you and interviewing you."
She took a deep breath, that feeling of being overwhelmed coming back once more. They wanted to help her, why was she fighting it?
"Okay. Thank you both, so much. I really don't know how i'd be able to get through this without any of you."