A/N: Hiya, here is the second last chapter. I have no idea when I'll write the last one so forgive me. Please.

This chapter is quite dark and explains a lot about Terry past. The part from the first person's POV are diary extracts. Please, review after reading.

Las Vegas, Nevada
The 18th of July 1994, Monday

He was there again. Sitting on the grass and reading a book. Waiting for him. Terence gulped. He had been mostly lying during the previous week. Lying to Spencer. He couldn't tell the truth either. Spencer could get hurt. And he didn't want Spencer get hurt. Terence himself had become hurt yesterday for no particular reason. In the eyes of his father he was abnormal, a freak. And on his father's scale, Spencer would be a freak too.

So there he stood, across the street, exactly on the same place than on the week previously, when he had met Spencer for the first time. Terence had had a reason to find him. A reason he wouldn't tell anyone. At least not yet. Not today.

"How long time have you stood here?" Suddenly Spencer was right in front of him. Terence jumped and took several steps backward until he sat down on the same bench he had occupied on that Tuesday.

"I'm sorry. I managed to scare you again." Spencer scratched the back of his head embarrassedly and sat next to the boy.

"It's alright. I shouldn't be so..." But Terence couldn't come up with any fitting word so he just looked down and started to knit the hem of his shirt once again. An angry blush appeared on his cheeks. Why he had to be such a wimp? Such a weak loser.

"Don't call yourself a loser."

"Ah, I didn't…" Terence looked up. Had he thought aloud?

"Yes, you did. I heard it very clearly. It doesn't matter what the others call you as long as you don't start looking down yourself." The older boy said sternly before turning away. "It's not easy. I know it very well. With all those people around and taunting you, one starts to think if something is wrong in oneself. But we all should value what we are because we can't change it… Some things we get from the environment we live in, some things from the genetics and some… are given us by chance."

"Spencie… I need to tell you something…" Terence looked down again. He had to do it. He really had to but he wasn't brave enough nor knew how to phrase it. He could feel the other boy watching him and waiting. Silently but not pressuring him at all.

"I…" In the mid-though he changed what he was going to tell. It was quite important too though. "I'm leaving tomorrow. We won't see anymore."

Spencer just watched him and nodded. He saw from the boy's eyes that that announcement wasn't the thing he had been going to say but didn't blame him at all. Whatever it was, it wasn't an easy matter to anyone. Especially not the only person who knew about it. The person who'd take his own life for not being able to tell anyone face to face about it.

The 28th of May 2005, Saturday
03:15 PM

The BAU had gathered in the conference room with Oliver, Audrey and Martha. Everyone was staring the file and the diary Audrey had found and. A while ago they had listened they girl telling how she had found them. The most shocked was Reid. He couldn't understand why Terry would label any file like that and what an earth would the file have inside. They had been friends after all.

"Terry didn't mean only your family, Doctor." Audrey said softly, breaking the trance-like silence. She reached for the file and took one sheet of paper in it.

'The twenty-eighth of May two-o-o-five.

If you are reading this, it means Audrey has found these two from my safe and I'm either dead or at hospital, unconscious. I hope it's the former because I don't know how to face any of you after you have found out the truth I have been hiding for twelve years now.

At this point I'd like to ask you not to judge me only by reading the label of this file and then, angered on me, chucking these both items to the nearest trash. No, if you do so you are very narrow-sighted and have misunderstood. So I beg you. Read my diary. You'll understand then everything. At least I hope you do. Idiots always exist.

You might be skeptical now. What have I been hiding during whole twelve years? Why have I taken my life now? Why I didn't tell this face to face? The answer is simple. I'm a coward. I was scared how you'd react. And when I was younger I was scared that someone would get hurt by my father because of what I had found out. Yes, I found out something my parents had done. They had isolated our whole family from theirs without any reason. They did it with a simple trick anyone can do, legally even. They did it legally and disappeared from the sight of their families.

So, what did they do then? Changed their surname. Only father's actually since mother had taken it when they'd married. And the change was anything too dramatic, only one letter changed. R-E-I-D became R-E-E-D.

I found out about this when I was eight and started to keep diary about my findings and other life. Now is your turn to read it. Everything I mention is stored inside this file.

Terence Matthew Reed'

Audrey stopped reading. The silence was thick, much thicker than before reading the letter. Reid had frozen. Questions were swirling in his mind but one of them dominated the others: Could they be related then?

"Why didn't he tell me?" Oliver asked quietly. He got no answer. Martha leaned closer to whisper gently to his ear and helped him sit down.

"I suppose we all should sit down. Anything Terry has written down must be something that will give us a lot to think." She said and the group obeyed silently. Hotch gave a look to Garcia who nodded and started to type on her computer.

"I found it. The official document that Adam and Tina Reed changed their last name. This is dated… the fifteenth of October 1976." The tech said. Everyone nodded. Rossi offered to read the diary with black worn out leather covers.

The year one-nine-nine-three. August. My name is Terry and I'm eight years old. I have finally found out why I don't seem to have any other family than mother, father, Oliver and Audrey. That's why I've started to write this diary. My parents have changed our surname. I don't know why but I know it happened before Oliver was born but after their weddings. We have never been allowed to take a look on the wedding pictures and I've always found it weird. So today I sneaked into my father's study and picked the lock of one of his drawers. I knew that was the one where he kept the photo album. I had seen him once looking at the photos with an angry face before locking them in. Today my parents are out and Oliver is at his friend's place. Audrey is sleeping. It's about three more weeks until she'll move to Masons. But now back to what I did. I sneaked into the study and picked the lock. I found the photo album and started to go through the photos. I looked all the happy faces of my parents' family members and friends and started to ask why we had never met them after that. I know I will never get an answer to that question and I'll never ask them. My eyes caught one picture particularly. It was about father and another man who resembled him a lot. Under the picture was a text: 'Husband and his brother William.' I managed to find another picture about that man. This time he had a woman with him. The text under it was: 'William with his fiancée Diana.' After that I couldn't continue anymore. I had family. Even from my father's side and most likely they didn't know anything about us just like we weren't supposed to know anything about them. I made me feel sick and also made me want to know more. So I went through the drawer and found an official paper about a name change. I was angry now. I put everything to their respective places and locked the drawer. I went back to my own room and started to write down what I had found. I have made a decision. No matter what, I'm going to find out more.

"So… we are cousins?" Reid looked at Audrey and Oliver. The detective had a stony face and he didn't say or do anything. Audrey in the other hand got up from her seat and sat next to the Doctor, taking firmly his hand.

"Please continue." The girl said quietly to Rossi.

The year one-nine-nine-four. January. It took a lot of work but I managed to find out more about father's brother's family. Apparently they have a son, Spencer, who is two years younger than Oliver, which means he's five years older than I. They live in Las Vegas but that's all I know.

The year one-nine-nine-four. July. We are in Vegas now. I can't believe how lucky I am. Father and mother have some businesses to attend so Oliver and I have been told to stay at the hotel. I'm not going to do it. I'm going to find Spencer. I want to see him at least once.
It didn't go as I had planned. I was only going to take one photo and leave but I managed to fall down and make him notice me. I panicked and lied about my name. I became Matthew Thompson to him. He's really nice though and now, when I'm writing this I'm almost crying. That's because I'm so happy. I'm happy that there is even one person I can trust. That I have also other family than the one I've known for too long time. But I can't tell him. I absolutely not can tell him. What if he'd try to help me and end up hurt just like I do in everyday basis?
There was a murder at the hotel today. The cops couldn't solve it. I did though. I couldn't go to meet Spencer today but tomorrow I will.
It was quite rainy day today. I met... Aunt Diana for the first time now. She is very nice woman. And even though the roles of who is taking care of whom have been turned upside down, Spencer is really lucky to have a mother who loves him.
Today we are leaving. I have already packed my stuff and I'm going to go to say goodbye to Spencer. We are not going to meet again but I'm happy I was able to meet him at all.

Reid clenched his fists when he heard the melancholic attitude in the diary. How any nine-year-old could write like that? And he only had known… Audrey next to him had troubles to keep her tears away. JJ placed her own hand on the young doctor free hand. Garcia left her computer and sat next to Audrey before nodding to Rossi.

The year one-nine-nine-five. June. It has been almost a year since I met Spencer. He really miss him. But while I'm missing him I have also gathered my courage to ask father why he had kept us from his family. I'm not going to mention meeting Spencer though. And today I'm going to go and ask him. Wish me luck.
It didn't go well at all. Although I didn't expect it to… Anyways father seemed to be angrier about what I found than the fact I had broken into his study. At the moment I'm in the hospital. It has been a day since I made my question and ended up falling down the stairs. It wasn't my purpose originally but I made him let go but stabbing the hand that was clutching the collar of my shirt. I've forbid all of them from meeting me. Audrey and the Masons are the only ones I allow to come. My right arm is broken but luckily I can write also with my left hand.

The year one-nine-nine-seven. May. Oliver has graduated. He is going to become a cop. We a bit closer now and he makes sure I don't need to be alone with father. I haven't said a thing about anything to him but I can see he feels guilty. We spend more time together. I've also started to help neighbors to earn money.
Spencer got the Doctor's degree on Mathematics and he's only seventeen now. I wish I could call and congratulate him.

The year one-nine-nine-eight. November. I got taken to see a doctor. Something is wrong with me. I've noticed it myself. I suppose it started a bit after the fall three years ago. Anyways I have to eat medicines now. They help me when I get too… upset. Father is not abusing me anymore. Not so much at least but sometimes I feel like I'd get hurt again.
There is a lock in the door of my room. It wasn't before there. Actually it appeared today while I was at school and when I went to do my homework someone locked it. At first I panicked but calmed down then. Father is scared. He thinks I'm going crazy and going to kill him so he keeps me behind the locked doors. But I can get out of here if I want to. And I'm let out for school and for dinner.

The year one-nine-nine-nine. January. I've ran out of my medicines and the door is locked. I can't think clearly. I can barely even write. Oliver is not home yet. I need help. There is that one photo in front of me and Spencer's number written behind it. I want to call but I don't have a phone for that. I'm almost fourteen and I'm crying like a baby.
I must have lost my control at some point. I remember anymore only Oliver opening my door and the room in a mess but I don't remember making the mess. Oliver made me promise to inform him in time if I'm about to run out of the medicines.

The year one-nine-nine-nine. March. I have now the key to the door and Oliver is watching after me while mother ignores me. Father in the other hand… he spends his time at work. I'm speeding up in my studies and working much faster than anyone else could be able to. My parents don't know about it. So everything should be fine.

The year one-nine-nine-nine. October. Scissors, razor, a carpet knife, a pocket knife, a surgery knife. What's in common with all of them? They all are sharp. Yes, I've started to cut myself. I'm proud about it but I can't help it anymore. At least I'm not using drugs, like some other kids in my school. They got expelled immediately and all the students were checked out. Believe or not, I got through it. After all I have no needle marks on my elbows of behind knees or between toes. I have only unhealed scars on my forearms. When I got questioned about my bandages I told I broke a jug and they believed it. How naïve can they be?

The year two-o-o-one. August. I'm sixteen years, five months and thirteen days old now. Father was arrested four months ago, for child abuse. The judge was biased: the bastard got only two years in prison. I'm living at Oliver's place now which is right opposite the Masons. Mother has disappeared so we sold the house. I don't want to go anywhere near that place anymore.
I have started to help at the police station. Oliver is going to work there in a year after all. At the moment it's just cleaning archive cabinets and clearing tables from coffee cups. Sometimes I give ideas for them about how they should go forward in their cases. Sometimes I'm actually helpful. I suppose it's because I've read so much.
I have taken up a habit of drinking coffee. It has a lot of sugar so it wouldn't be so bitter. It keeps me awake through the nights and the nightmares away when I truly have to sleep.
I found out that Spencer is an FBI agent now and he has many Ph.D.'s and Bachelor degrees. And I absorb any information I can get about him. Now I'm trying to do all I can to reach his level. When I was younger I was always compared to Oliver but now I'm comparing myself to Spencer. I even went to take a new IQ test. The previous one is from when I was six after all. The new result is 178.
I know. I'm obsessed. And obsessions are bad.

The year two-o-o-three. April. The last two months I have been anxious about this day. Actually the last two years I have been anxious about this day. Because today father was supposed to be released. My fear was for absolutely nothing. Because of that fear I started to have the nightmares. Father hung himself last night. We are not going to keep him funerals. I'm not going to go anywhere near him, Oliver is furious to him and Audrey hasn't thought him as her father for ten years. And mother… she is who knows where. Remarried, that's all we know.

The year two-o-o-three. May. I'm drowning myself in work. In school work (I've started to study at AIA) and police work. On purpose. I've decreased my medication and it allows me to think much clearer. The police trust me more after two years of helping them and when they get really tricky case I'm actually asked to come and help. It's interesting and nice. I don't need to try to blend in anymore. But the reason why I'm doing this is that ever since father killed himself, I've been near to tell Oliver what I found almost ten years ago. But I don't know how to tell it. I'm scared how he'd react. He'd ask for sure why I haven't told earlier. So I'm a coward and shut my mouth. I forget everything. Or at least try to.

The year two-o-o-three. September. Classic case at work. A boy was living with his mother and abusive father. Father killed the mother. Abusing continued. When the boy grew up he started to kill men like his father and finally the father himself. We got on the trail but too late. The boy killed himself right after the last murder. He was eight years older than I. You won't believe how many times I have thought that I'm much like that classic case. Sometimes I've been scared that I turn out to be a classic case. I remember joking about it once. That was nine years, two months and eleven days ago. When I spent time with Spencer. I'm kind of happy I didn't turn out to be one of those classic cases. It would be horrible.

The year two-o-o-four. March. A dream I never voiced to anyone came true on my nineteenth birthday. I have a motorbike now. It's a joint gift from Oliver, Audrey, Masons and the people from station. I'm happy. The words are not enough to express myself. I have even managed to cut down the cutting along the years. What a pun…

The year two-o-o-four. July. I gathered my courage and travelled to Las Vegas. I wasn't going to meet Spencer. He is most likely busy with all the cases he has. No, I was going to meet Aunt Diana. I arrived to the house they used to live and started to poke around. I could see on a one glance that they weren't living there anymore. From neighbors I found out where Diana is at the moment. They even remembered me after the years. I never thought they had paid any attention on me.
It went better than I expected. Diana was very wary around me bet seemed to recognize me. I fully understand her behavior. I wonder is she going to tell Spencer about my visit. I didn't tell her the truth either but I was relieved I was able to talk with someone at all.
I'm back to Atlanta now. Oliver is asking why I went to Vegas. I don't tell.

The year two-o-o-five. May. Something is going on. The winners of AIA's designing competition are getting kidnapped one by one. There is a pattern and I have a fair guess about the mastermind. I have to wait and gather more information first though. Oliver wants to call the BAU here. I asked him to wait a bit.
The BAU is here now. Spencer was with them. Something was bothering him. The robbers are going to strike at Caffeine Forest today and I know I'll be the target. Well, I'll let them get what they want.
I left the hospital a while ago. I have a surgery knife with me. No one even notice me to borrow it. I'm ready now. I'm going to leave everyone. One of the reasons is that I can't keep on going anymore. The other one is that Spencer knows I'm Matthew Thompson. It's only a matter of time when he'd start look for information about me and find everything. It's easier to give the answer straight away but I can't do it face to face. I'm not strong enough.

So this is the good bye. I hope you'll forgive me. I hope you don't feel guilty. This was my own choice. The all of you, I asked Audrey to gather into this very room, are people I can trust with this information. You decide what to do with it.

Terence Matthew Reid.

Rossi closed the diary and placed it on the table. No one said anything. Audrey was crying silently. Oliver was hugged by Martha and silent tears were running down his cheeks too. Reid was gripping JJ's hand painfully hard but the woman didn't say anything. Hotch was shocked but held his blank face, only just though. Prentiss sniffed and shifted on her chair uncomfortably. Hearing the deepest thoughts of that smart young man – heck, he was more like a boy – wasn't pleasant to anyone. Morgan opened his mouth finally.

"No one should go through that. Absolutely no one."

A/N: Here, you are welcome. See you again at some point!