Chapter 6

Katara,

How is the wedding planning going? Have you decided on a location yet? Most of my advisers think I should push for the wedding to be held here. It would do wonders for tourism, but I don't think we're close enough to the nearest port. All the guests from the waterbending tribes would have to be escorted inland from the coast, and organizing the logistics of that would be a hassle. Still, my minions think it can be done. The Minister of Trade and the Mayor of Omashu even collaborated on a proposal. I'll attach it to this letter.

Let me know what I can do to help!

Toph

::o:x:o::

Toph,

ARRRGGGHHHHHHHH!

Why are men so useless?

Katara

The queen's secretary cleared her throat and began tidying a stack of paperwork. At this signal, servants swept inwards from the corners of the room and began clearing away the breakfast dishes. Toph's bowl of fruit was whisked away and a hot towel put in its place. She heard the quiet splash of jasmine tea hitting porcelain and reached unerringly for the cup. A deep breath of fragrant steam, and she smiled.

Toph sipped her tea, savoring what were no doubt the last moments of peace she would have for the rest of the day. In just a few minutes, she would dive head first into a whirlwind of meetings and audiences and appearances. Being queen was . . .restrictive - every hour of every day meticulously planned - but it wasn't boring. There were politicians to frustrate and complex letters to compose, schemes within schemes and layers of meaning hidden by exquisite formalities. There were important decisions to make. Surprise fluttered in Toph's stomach, as it always did when she contemplated just how much her idea of fun had changed in the past four years.

The main clock struck the hour. Even if Toph couldn't hear the bells echoing down the hallways, she would have felt the ponderous vibrations spreading through the palace floors, rising and falling like water. She started to stand, only to feel Lien's hand on her arm, keeping her in the chair. "This came for you from the Avatar," she said, passing over a small tablet.

Toph grasped it with both hands, her fingers fanning over raised characters etched into the stone. It took her a moment to translate the shapes she felt beneath her callused fingertips into words, but eventually she deciphered the message: You are cordially invited . . .

"Cute." Aang had gotten rather good at crafting delicate, pretty things over the last few years, and the evidence was there in her hands: wind and waves and lotus blossoms, all perfectly rendered and set with colored crystals. He probably spent too much time making gifts to give Katara, but she had agreed to marry him, so all that work had paid off. Toph smirked. "This will make a nice desk ornament."

The invitation was smooth, porous stone, only slightly larger than her cupped palms. It might have appeared sturdy and official, but its thinness made it unexpectedly fragile, easy to chip or crack. Paper would have been more practical, if not as pretty. But if what Toph had heard about brides was true, during the wedding planning phase they lost all commonsense and became obsessed with aesthetics, so doing something ridiculous like hiring earthbenders to carve stone plaques instead of making do with the traditional calligraphy and scroll arrangement was totally acceptable. "They forgot to include the address," Toph noticed, brow wrinkling in confusion. "Think it's too late to stop Katara from mailing these out?"

"It appears that they have left some empty space at the bottom for that information to be added. Perhaps this is just a draft? Lady Katara has said that she wants your input regarding the wedding details."

Toph grunted, clearly not pleased with that reminder. "Kind of stupid to be discussing colors and flowers with someone who can't see," she said matter-of-factly. "But I guess I could help make them if I had something to copy. How many of these do you think she'll need?" To achieve that level of detail, she would have to concentrate extremely hard, forming each invitation one at a time. The migraine it would cause . . .

"Probably a few hundred."

"You know what?" Toph asked after a few moments of painful contemplation, "I'm the queen of a city of earthbenders. I don't actually have to make these all myself! I'll order some of my minions to take care of it!"

Toph,

[Help!]

Katara is driving everyone crazy. It's all color schemes and floral arrangements and what dish served when, where, and why. That blissful expression Aang used to wander around wearing has morphed into a glassy-eyed look of terror. Even my uncle tenses up whenever he sees Katara rounding the corner. The only good thing to come out of this is that all my ministers are completely cowed by her. When she's in the room during a meeting things tend to run a lot more smoothly, if you can ignore the sounds of everyone's knees knocking.

Now she's hounding me about drafting the best man's speech? I never signed on for a public speaking engagement!

Zuko

::o:x:o::

Zuko,

Here's some advice, from a professional, experienced woman to a pathetic, confused young man.

Whatever she asks for, give in. But in order to avoid the appearance of being a spineless weasel, you should avoid her whenever you can. You have flunkeys, lackeys, hangers-on, and/or minions, don't you? Throw them in her path like sacrificial lambs and order them to cater to her every whim. Better them than you.

You would do well to follow this wisdom when it comes to dealing with any woman in your life.

Toph

::o:x:o::

Toph,

That's the worse advice I've ever heard.

Zuko

P.S. But it made me laugh. So thanks for that.

P.P.S. You did not just refer to yourself as a "professional, experienced woman." What does that even mean?