A/N: Sandstorm has noticed that I haven't updated in a few weeks…. Silly me!

Kitpaw returns to camp with Dadpaw, Tigerclone, and Airpaw. "Evilpaw was just playing Fortnite!" she announced.

Yolostar, on top of the Rock smiles warmly at his son and daughter. He also smiles at Dadpaw. "Good job!" he greets. "Warrior name time!"

Kitpaw folds in her wings and narrows her eyes at her father. She could just make out Yolostar's purple eyes derping.

Angrypaw yowls in spite. "Really!?" He pouts while pouring himself a Sprite. "If Dadpaw gets to be a warrior, I should too!"

Yolostar smiles evilly. "Nope!" Then, StarClan floats a pair of sunglasses down onto Yolostar's face.

"Dang," Whyanything mews. "How does that even work?"

Moonkitti shakes her head. "It isn't supposed too," she replied. "We live in a world worse than Starkit's!"

Both Mymom and Dataunt scowl at Yolostar. "What about our sons!?"

Yolostar shakes his head and his sunglasses fall off. "Evilpaw's just evil and Angrypaw is a sad nobody."

"Hey!" Nobodyface squeaks. "That's supposed to be me and Fillergal!"

"Yeah!" Wimpykit agrees from behind Fillergal and Greasekit just shrugs. "I'm not!"

Fillergal sighs. "Greasekit," she mews. "Our whole family is a nobody."

Yolostar crosses his front legs and hums to himself. "Kitpaw is now Kitkat, Airpaw is now Airhorn, and Dadpaw is now Dadbeard!"

Airhorn honks in delight. "Hunk!"

Kitkat sighed. "Of all warrior names, I'm named after a candy!?"

Moonkitti nods. "Yep! That's what happens in Trollfics!"

Dadbeard slaps a pirate hat on his head. "I'm Dadbeard!"

Angrypaw just snarls and walks away. "I'll just hang with Evilpaw," he mutters quietly.

Meanwhile in The Dark Ritual Chamber, otherwise the TDRC, Evilpaw had just crowned himself, Evilstar. He is now the leader of DeathClan!

"Redwillow is my new deputy!" Evilstar yowls. It was kind of sad that Breezepelt was the only other member.

"Redwillow! Redwillow! Redwillow!" Breezepelt cheers.

Then Angrypaw arrives, accompanied by Greasekit, who followed him. "We want to join your Clan and be appreciated," they mew.

Evilstar nodds. "Anrgypaw is now Angryboi and Greasekit is now Greasepelt!"

Breezepelt and Redwillow cheer for the new warriors! "Angryboi! Greasepelt! Angryboi! Greasepelt!"

Meanwhile, in StarClan, Firestar sends Foxleap away. "Get Hollyleaf, Lionblaze, and Spottedleaf!"

Foxleap shrugged and runs away to get them.

Sandstorm looks at Firestar. "Why her?" she asks.

Firestar smiles evilly. "Spottedleaf is overpowered!" His tail whips gracefully. "She'll kill Evilstar!"

Sandstorm frowns. "Evilstar killed Ivypool and Hawkfrost near the same time!"

Firestar stubbornly puffs his chest out. "Then we can kill my former dream girlfriend!"

Sandstorm smiles with glee. "And we can be rid of her! The haters will love you!"

Firestar shrugs. "I'm still half Gary Stu."

Spottedleaf, Lionblaze, and Hollyleaf run up to Firestar. "Yes Firestar?" Lionblaze and Hollyleaf ask their grandfather. Spottedleaf asks at the same time, "Yes babe?"

Firestar glares at Spottedleaf. "Lionblaze and Hollyleaf," Firestar ordered. "Spy on Evilstar." Firestar smiles evenly at Spottedleaf. "My dear Spottedleaf," he mews. "Kill Evilstar."

Hollyleaf and Lionblaze nod. "Eye-Eye, Captain!"

Firestar pretends he can't hear them and sees Spottedleaf blush. "Yes, sweetheart!"

Firestar thinks Spottedleaf has become a hooker in the previous years. She's kind of creepy!

Meanwhile (again), in the Dark Forest (Kitty Hell), Tigerstar decides to kill Brokenstar. He easily wins. "Worthless scum!" he growls.

Brokenstar gasps. "Wolfjem," he gags. "Stop calling this place Kitty Hell!" Then Brokenstar dies.

"No," I say, giggling.

Tigerstar facepalms. "Do I look like I care?"

"Nah," I reply. "But, I have to leave! I'm not supposed to be here!" Then, I disappear.

Mapleshade sighs. "We lost too much today." She closes her eyes. "We all lost Hawkfrost!"

Tigerstar rolls his eyes as Mapleshade hugs him and cries into his chest fur. Does she think we're mates!?

Tigerstar frowns. "Mourn your son somewhere else."

Mapleshade nods, her eyes shining. "Yes sir!" Then she runs 30 feet away and starts bawling again.

Tigerstar wants to die.