Enjoy this chapter, lovelies, we have a few more chapters after this one before they get any more time together. Let Me Down Easy is on the block next, and Sculpted Shadows: The Tear is posted, on the same day that Sculpted Shadows was born. As always, thank you to my awesome beta (avacynguardianangel on tumblr).
(Jace Beleren)
It seems like only seconds ago that I was taking Liliana, only mere moments ago that we were in the throes of passion. A hand is shaking me from my sex induced slumber, I assume it is her, so I roll over and try to pull her in.
"Jace, wake up!" says a distinctly Brazilian voice, but much deeper than the girl's that fell asleep beside me. I crack my eyes open and Josu is sitting on the edge of my bed. Still sleepy, the only words I manage to croak out are some of the dumbest I have uttered in my life.
"You're not Liliana."
"No shit, Jace. Wake the fuck up! We're gonna have a talk real quick like."
"That's fine, and I'll talk to you, but dude, I'm naked. Get out so I can get dressed."
He exits into the bathroom and shuts the door. Liliana must have told, there's no other reason that he'd be up here trying to talk to me. I mean, we've spoke a few words in passing, but that's about it. I take a breath, hoping that he's not here to be hostile with me. I don't want anything started with him, but I'm not backing off. Liliana asked me for this- and no one but her is going to stop us. I hate it for Josu, I know he loves her, but he's not going to stand in my way. My dad told me that the only thing you should want to change about a girl is her last name, and I'm out to prove to her that she can trust me, and that I won't break her heart.
"You can come back in now," I say, deciding to stand up with my arms crossed.
"Look, Josu," I start, but he cuts me off.
"Save it, Jace. I'm only up here to tell you few things, and it's not 'get away from my sister.' It's something else."
"Okay, then what is it?"
"I know how Liliana is. She's flirty, she's pretty, I get it. If I was in your shoes, I wouldn't say no either. But she's had some really bad things happen to her at the hands of some of these guys and girls she's been with. I'm tired of seeing her put herself out there and get hurt. And I don't know what she's asked of you, but all I know is that she seems to really be sticking her neck out and personally, I don't understand why. She hasn't done it in years. I don't know what you've told her, but Jace, I swear, if you make her promises and don't keep them, it will not be pretty. If you hurt her- I'm going to hurt you. And that's the only way I know how to say it. I think you're a pretty cool guy, I think you're pretty funny and that you care about your family. But try to see it from my point of view- because Liliana and Kaalia are the only things that matter to me. And I'm not going to let anyone hurt her."
"Believe it or not, I understand, because I feel the same way. Do you think I want Avy dating a guy that's older than me? Hell no! But I have to trust Avacyn's judgment and Sorin's word. And Josu, I am giving you my word, I will not intentionally hurt Liliana. She seems like she doesn't want anything more than a fuck and I'm not going to force her into anything she doesn't want."
"Maybe it's because I know her- but if she wasn't interested in you- yourself- not just your dick, she wouldn't have held your hand in the backseat. She can scream that all she wants is sex, but watch her eyes. They give her away. Maybe she doesn't even know it yet, but I do. Because I know her. But that brings me to another question," Josu huffs.
"What?" I say, my interest piqued.
"What I'm more interested in is what do you want, Jace?"
I heave a deep sigh. I've been avoiding this question myself, actually. After Tamiyo and I broke up, I kinda just fell out of dating and wanting to date, I buried myself in work and school. I haven't entertained the idea of dating anyone until Liliana just popped up out of the blue. I'm scared of her- not physically, obviously, but I'm scared of screwing up- even more so now. I would love to get to know her.
"If she'd let me, I'd like to be the one that showed her we're not all the same. But she honestly doesn't seem like she wants more than sex."
"Just give her a chance to open up, Jace. I don't think she's ever been treated like a human in any of her "relationships," and that drove a rift between Sorin and myself for the longest time, and the one before him was even worse," I must have a worried look on my face, because Josu changes his train of speech, " Don't worry about your sister, though. Sorin has never once cared what the father of a girl he was "dating" cared about, well, he did once. But she broke his heart. And then he just stopped caring. Until a few weeks ago. I don't know what sort of spell she's put on him, but he really, really cares for her. He hasn't even mentioned sex and it's been nearly a month since they started talking. I'd be more worried for Sorin than Avy, because trust me, she's got all the power right now. But Liliana- she needs TLC, honestly. Because she's got a fence around her heart ten miles high. She needs somebody willing to work through the demons that she's had forced on her. And if you're not willing to do that, then I'm asking you, Jace, man to man, let her wait for somebody that will. And you understand that, you don't want your sister getting taken advantage of, just like me."
Josu is asking me to make a decision, but I think it's already been made. When I told her that I wouldn't abuse her trust. When she asked me what she did, she obviously saw something in me, something that maybe no one else can see. I swallow, looking in Josu's eyes. He just wants the best for her and that's what I'm going to give her. I promise myself that right now. I want to know her for who she is underneath the desperation, the vixen, who she is beneath the persona she puts off.
"I'm going to try to crack her shell, Josu. I'm going to try, I promise. But can I ask you something?"
"Of course," Josu says, a questioning look on his face.
"Can you give me some help? Like talk to her for me, her intentions, etcetera, etcetera."
"I like you, Jace. I think you're a good guy and that you'd be good for her. I'll do my best."
I breathe a sigh of relief. Liliana trusts Josu with all of her heart, and having him on my side will do nothing but help this cause. We both want her to be happy. And I will show her that I can make her happy.
"But Jace, I want to let you know, if you decide to go down this road my father will not take kindly to this- because in his eyes, you are related. I know he's not your father or your authority but I know him and that's how he is. He was barely a father to Liliana and I, so don't expect much out of him, I don't know how your relationship with your father is, in all honesty."
"I have a father. A great father. Don't worry about that."
"But just be careful, I don't want either of you to get hurt."
"I'll protect both of us to the best of my ability."
"That's all I can ask of you."
He looks at me with gratitude in his eyes, I find it hard to believe that this beautiful girl has been treated so badly that he has to do this. I want to be the reason for her smile. I know it's going to take time, but I will show her I deserve a chance to do this. Josu speaks.
"And Jace?"
"Yeah?"
"Cut the come to papa shit, ain't NOBODY wanna hear that."
"Josu?"
"Call me Su. And yeah?"
"Somebody really messed her up, didn't they?"
He closes his eyes and nods, then opens them and makes eye contact.
Josu extends a hand and I take it. He lets go and we both nod and he exits my room, leaving me guessing as to how exactly I'm going to do what I just promised.
A week later, I'm coming in from work. I do four days a week with the local aquarium and train the dolphins there. It's part of my internship for school. When class starts back up, I'm going to school two days for a degree in marine biology. Liliana has taken to coming into my room when I get off. Sometimes she's holding her calculus book, sometimes she holding a movie. We said that we were going to start Game of Thrones soon and I have to say that I'm looking forward to it. We've messed around, of course, but we haven't done much else because there have been so many people in the house. I think Sorin and Kaalia are coming over and Josu is helping her move into Tulane on Saturday. We've got about a month and a half before Rafael is officially my stepfather- making us related by law but not by blood. I don't have any plans to stop once this happens and I don't think she does, either. I thought about her nonstop today, in pure ways as well as very, very impure ways. We've kept a pretty steady text conversation going all day, she should be getting home from ballet soon, if she's not already here. I'm going to my dad's tomorrow for a couple days and I'm really going to miss our routine, however, I miss my dad, too.
I hear a bag hit the floor from across the hall, and I walk through the bathroom and into her room before she can walk over to mine. She turns and sees me in the doorway and walks over to me. She wraps her arms around my neck and smiles.
"Hello, doll. How was ballet?"
"Boring and lame as usual, the people in my class need to get on my level."
"Damn, that's not self-important at all," I laugh.
"Either be good or be good at it," Liliana says, planting a soft kiss on my neck. "How was work?"
"It was fine, they just brought in a new dolphin with a prosthetic fin. He's huge compared to the other ones."
"I'd like to see him one day."
"Do you want to help me name him?"
"Yes!" Her smile is lighting up her whole face.
" We can go one day this weekend when you don't have ballet. I'm staying with my Dad on Monday and Tuesday, we can go then, too. I actually have a day off." Is this a date? Is it a predate? Is it a non-date date? Oh my god. WOMEN.
"Sure, but you know I have ballet everyday pretty much. We could go after. How about Tuesday afternoon?"
"Of course. I'm leaving my dad's around lunchtime on Tuesday and I'll swing by here and pick you up. Are Sorin and Kaalia coming over?"
"Today? Yes. They are. They should be here soonish. Are Sorin and your sister finally a thing?"
"I think- I know they've been out on a couple of dates."
"Good on her for making him wait, it'd do him some good."
"Sometimes it's worth it."
"What?"
"Sometimes, Liliana, the person is worth the wait."
She snorts under her breath and I don't know what else to say, so I just kiss her. I pull her hips to mine and she returns it, a half smile still on her lips. She goes for my belt- I stop her hand before she does anything.
"I need a shower- I've been in a fish tank all day. And we need to talk about what we're doing and lay down some ground rules. I know they're going to expect us to be down there in a few minutes, so tell me right now. Are we doing this or not?"
"I told you I wanted to, Jace." She says, exasperated.
"How much research have you done?"
"Um, not much. I looked up online things about limits but that's about all."
"We need to lay those down now, Liliana. We can work out all the finer details later, but before we do anything else, I want to know your limits."
"I'll think about it, because I honestly don't know. I can't think of anything off the top of my head, but you need to be thinking too," she says, meeting my eyes.
"I will- and I have been. I'll give you some time to think about it," I say, happy with how this is going to so far.
"I think this is going to be fun," she croons against my neck, placing her warm lips there. "And what were you saying about a shower?"
"Goddammit."
"What, doll?"
"He's here again."
"Who, the pale guy?" I say, curious as to why she dislikes him. The guy seems quite unpleasant as it is, but I don't know if something has happened or not.
"Yes, I can't fucking stand him. Neither can Josu." She says, under her breath.
"Why is he here then?"
"His dad is a friend of my dad's and he wants us to date." She looks at me, wanting to see what my reaction is. The envy creeps into my throat- white hot and bitter like bile. I know that I'll never have Rafael's approval just because of the circumstances under which Liliana and I met. I told Josu that I would get to know her, and it seems like a roadblock is popping up in every direction that I turn.
"You're cute when you're jealous, Jace," she whispers so no one around can hear this. We're a good fifty yards away from everyone- we're having a bonfire in the back yard tonight. She reaches up, brushes my lips with her finger and then takes a couple steps back, so as not to raise suspicion.
"I, just, he looks like a dickbag and you deserve better. I'll show you better."
Oh. My. God. Beleren! What did you just say to her? She's made it clear what she wants to do, and Josu said that you needed to take it slow, make her realize, give her TLC, and you basically just… Goddammit. I feel my face growing red and my ears growing warm. But all Liliana did was smile and walk over to an empty chair and gesture for me to follow.
"Where's Josu?" Matias asks Liliana. They had been arguing earlier. Apparently Matias had been messing around in her room, on her ballet bar and with some of her supplies for school. She cursed at him in Portuguese and he ran to tell Rafael. No wonder they don't have the greatest relationship. He's a snitch.
"I don't know, I think he's waiting on Kaalia, Ty," Liliana says, "Why?"
"I don't know, I feel like getting on his nerves."
"Matias- do you not remember what happened last time you purposely tried to annoy Josu? Did you or did you not wake up with half your hair shaved off? Don't bite off more than you can chew, bambino."
"Don't call me bambino, I'm not a baby anymore," he almost shouts at her. She rolls her eyes and points for him to get out of her line of warmth from the crackling, popping fire.
"Why are you two always together, anyways?"
"It's because I've replaced you as a brother, Matias. No, you little shit, he's my friend."
"You don't make friends, Liliana." He points out. I have a look on my face that obviously spells annoyance too. I can tell.
"Go away, Ty."
"You and Josu are always so nice to each other but mean to me."
"Take a look at how you treat Josu and I. Go away, Matias."
The kid just rolls his eyes and walks away as Sorin, Kaalia, and the pale guy walk back into the yard, flanked by Josu in the back. The pale kid looks really flushed and Josu looks angry, so I'm going to assume that they had some sort of argument before this. Avacyn jumps out of her chair, runs across the yard and jumps on Sorin- they're definitely a couple- and mom doesn't look very happy about it. I make it a point to talk to Avacyn tonight or tomorrow. I just don't know if I should tell her what's going on with Liliana or not.
"Do you want something to drink, leesi?" It was barely a whisper, I'm sure no one else heard, not even Kaalia, who's sitting on Josu's lap next to Lili.
She blushes and looks around, but nods her head. I get up and head inside to grab a couple of the fish tacos that Liliana made while I was in the shower- this meal is distinctly Brazilian. I grab a couple of sodas and head back out to the back yard, but the pale guy is sitting in my seat. Liliana looks pissed off. I don't know what happened between them but he's going to be moving real quickly.
"Hey, buddy. That's my seat- she sent me inside and I'm going to need you to get up." I say, calmness running throughout my voice.
"Move your feet, lose your seat, bud."
"Ashiok- get up. She doesn't want you there." Josu snarls at him.
"I'm not scared of you, Vess."
"Get up, motherfucker, or I'll beat you into next week."
"I'll hold his hands, Josu." The Brazilian smiles at me.
"Liliana, be nice, you grew up with him." Rafael starts.
"Dad- shut up. I don't like him and neither does Josu, give it up!"
"Young lady.." he starts, but he's cut off by Mom, which is probably a good thing.
"Jace, why don't you go sit next to Emmy? Or Avacyn?" Mom's highpitched voice rings out.
"Because she obviously doesn't want him right there- and it seems like the only people who care about what she wants are Josu and I."
"He's always been this way- he doesn't like people that go against a woman's wishes. Especially when they're small like Liliana or not very vocal like Emmara or Avy." Mom says. As if I have to explain myself to him. He's not my father.
Ashiok reluctantly moves over and I sit down beside her, and she looks visibly relieved. I take my place next to her as everyone goes back to what they were doing. I give her hand a quick squeeze and place her Dr. Pepper in front of her, smiling.
I think I'm doing well, and Josu catches my eye. He gives me a quick nod and a smile, unbeknownst to anyone, even Liliana. I give him a grin back, and turn my attention back to the beautiful woman beside me.
That night, after an evening with Matias and watching Sorin and Avy nearly fuck with their clothes on after the parents went in, Liliana heads up to her room and I to mine, wishing that she was here with me. I can't stop thinking about the yoga pants she had on, and I already feel my jeans getting tighter. I don't know if my ears are playing tricks on me, but I hear the click-clack of heels coming across the bathroom floor- what on earth could she be doing? I sit up as she comes into the room holding a green polka dot blanket and wearing nothing but a pair of red stiletto heels with a peep toe.
"Can I sleep with you?"
I smile, wondering what on earth could have brought this on, but thankful that something did. She almost looks scared, but I can't tell if it's just nerves, because this is the first time she has truly instigated a sexual encounter between us. I have found myself stroking a stubborn hard on when I think about being in her, her tightness, the fact that she was soaked for me.
"Of course, but those don't exactly look like bedroom slippers, doll."
"Oh, these aren't for me, I just thought you might like to see."
"Oh, I like what I see very, very much, leesi."
"I was just practicing ballet because I couldn't sleep, and I thought you might want to see what I've been working on."
"Mhmm," I say, allowing my hand to slip under my sleep pants and wrap around my steadily hardening manhood.
She stands on her tiptoes, which I'm not sure how she could because of the shoes and spins while steadily lifting her leg into the air, bending it backwards until her foot touched the back of her head. I shouldn't be turned on by this, but since my self-control is lacking, my hand begins to stroke slowly, deliberately.
"Impressive, leesi. You can tell she's passionate about dancing and that it makes her happy, and I make a mental note to be at a couple of her rehearsals and her next recital, definitely. I think that will help the cause, and it needs a lot of help if she's going to trust me.
"Jace?"
"Yes, doll?"
"I need you to take me, I know everyone is in the house, but please moja droga, take me. Just, please. I need you "
"Did you look up Polinski just for me?"
She smiles a small smile and removes the heels, bringing her blanket with her. She wraps it around both of us and brings her naked form into me. I'm entranced with her beautiful body, her skin is the color of café au lait, her breasts are so beautiful- but as I'm taking her in, I notice something. She seems self-conscious, like she already knows what I'm going to say.
"I know- I know, you don't have to say anything. They're slightly uneven,"
"Hush. Your imperfections are what make you perfect, they make you human. You're beautiful, and I want to know every inch of this beautiful body, and your soul if you'll let me."
She blushes and drops her head, and I plant a kiss on top there. She moans when she feels that I'm already rock solid for her. Her face is still red, so just to prove that they are beautiful- every single inch, I take one in my mouth and the other in my hand as Lili tries to stifle the moans that she's making. I take the sensitive bud between my fingers, putting pressure on them as she squeaks. I clamp my hand over her mouth quickly- we have to be quiet. As much as I want to hear those sweet, sensual moans, she can't moan right now.
I bring the back of her neck close to me and whisper in her ear.
"If you don't keep quiet, doll, I'm going to gag you."
She moans-albeit loudly- at this. My god, this girl. She is so, so sensual, and filling this position seems like something we've both been waiting for. I grab a tie from the nightstand and look into her eyes. She nods and gives me a look that says I trust you. And then she opens her mouth. Careful not to be too tight, she lets me gag her. She slowly begins to stroke me as I revel in the beauty of her bare skin, gripping her hips, sliding up her torso, cupping her breasts in my hands. I knead the soft flesh in between my fingers, sometimes teasing her nipples just a bit. Her body is arching and she is pouring wetness- her inner thighs are soaked. Tasting the mess I've made, she struggles to keep her moans at bay, even with the tie in her mouth. Every inch of her velvet center will be touched by my mouth tonight. I want to make sure she knows that this dripping, soaked cunt is mine. I'm not even going to get her close, so I pull back, but something we forgot earlier hits me like a ton of bricks.
"If you want me to stop make 'Live long and prosper,' okay? You know what that is, right?"
She just rolls her eyes at me and tries to push my head back down between her thighs. However, she's not going to get it that easily.
"No Ma'mm, sit up. And spread."
She gives me a small whimper but otherwise does what she is told. I begin to slowly stroke myself, and she tries to bat my hand away but I stop her. I gesture for her to do the same. I make circle motions with my thumb, indicating that I want to watch her please herself-well, almost. She gives me a sad look before I give her a stern one in return. However, she does it, nowhere near as enthusiastic as she was earlier. As she does so, I put my mouth back to work. It's not long before her toes start to curl, and as they do, I pull away from her, and she doesn't even contest it. She starts to try and spit the gag out, she knows what I desire from her. I reach behind her, untie it, and cup her face. She closes her eyes, smiles, and then puts in work with her mouth.
She starts by stroking it and teasing me with her mouth, sucking softly on the spot where the head and shaft meet, tracing the tip with her tongue, and steadily massaging me in her hand. When her mouth and the back of her throat come in contact with my manhood, I buck my hips into her mouth, because it was cool- I don't know where she learned that, but goddammit, I'm glad she did. She moans around my cock, and she is trying her very damndest to get it all in her mouth, but she can't, so I decide to take matters into my own hands by pushing her a bit. I thrust into her mouth, hitting the back of her throat. She takes a breath through her nose and looks up at me with an expression that clearly says "please," so I grab the back of her head and thrust. I'm going to end up being a hypocrite because it's taking every bit of my self-control not to moan out loud. I can't take the coolness of her mouth and the fact that she's almost choking on my cock. Her eyes are begging me for more, but I can't bring myself to gag her any more than I already have. I pull out of her mouth, much to her dismay.
"I still can't get over the fact that you actually like sucking me off."
"Well, in all honesty, it's just you. I rarely ever did it for Sorin or any of my exes. Something about the way you look at me makes me want it. I love the way you feel inside any of the holes in my body, really.
"Did you just give me an invitation to, quite literally, stick it in the butt?"
"Eloquent, Jace. Your way with words is like no other."
"Can you give me a straight answer?"
"I'm not saying no, but I'm not saying yes, either. It's something we have to work towards, because right now I'm not comfortable with that, at all."
"Okay, doll. I'm glad you're being straight up with me, because we need to keep the channels of communication clear. Any other limits I should know about, right now?"
She nods her head and begins to place little kisses on the tip of my manhood. Her mouth was amazing, but I need to have her, right now. I motion for her to come to me, and she starts to curl up against my side, but I hoist her hips up, her dripping, hot core resting on my pelvic bones. She looks slightly unnerved. "Just call me puddin' if you want me to stop." I know it's geeky, but it's the first thing that I thought of.
"Is Harley's phrase our safe word, Jace?"
I smile at her as I lift her hips onto my hardness. She bites the hell out of her bottom lip trying not to moan- and I get the idea for my next drawing. She's so raw, and so beautiful in this moment. She slowly begins to rock her hips as her soaked center drips onto me. The fluid motions of her tummy and pelvis is the definition of intoxicating. I can almost feel the stubborn hard on I'm going to get when this spills on paper. I feel the tip of my cock rubbing against the ribbed pleasure center and she gasps, and makes a tiny squeaking noise as she does. She bounces, and she clamps her hand over my mouth, which was smart, because it stifled the loud moan that I wasn't able to contain. I run my thumb over her quivering center, but she bats my hand away, I give her a look of excuse me, missy.
"I want to cum from riding you fat cock-without help."
I nod and Liliana extracts herself from me, and I'm automatically missing her warmth. I grab her hips and push her back down on my cock, to which she literally gushes all over me. She leans down into my ear.
"Just trust me, tatus."
Holy shit. Did she just say what I thought she did? Polinski is one of those language that it's easy to make mistakes in, but she's obviously been looking up a few choice words.
"Liliana,"
She doesn't let me get another word out, but she turns to face the wall and takes me to the hilt, causing both of us to gasp in pleasure. I place my thumbs on her dimples of Venus and take in the beautiful sight above me. I've never seen an ass like hers. Her back is every bit as hypnotizing as her front is, moving gracefully in waves over me. She grinds her perfect hips, her warmth encasing my hardness, wetness from her dripping on to me She's quivering with desire. She rides contentedly for a few minutes before I feel her tightening around me, so I take matters into my own hands. I thrust upwards. Hard. She stifles yet another moan, she rocks and I match her tit for tat. I feel my own orgasm building as she grows ever tighter around me.
"Cum for me, doll.."
Her head is thrown back in complete ecstasy; she is biting her lip to keep the moans at bay. My breath is coming in quick pants; I grip and guide her hips as quickly as I can.
"I'm going to.."
She nods at me, knowing what I'm saying. Her body clenches around my cock as I fill her, both of our eyes alight with the passion that we have created. The place where we are joined is soaked, from both of us.
She rolls off of me and into my chest, her brow just a touch sweaty. I walk over to the bay window and crack it open as I pull my plaid pajama pants back on. I'm going to take her right here next time we have sex.
"Awh," she says, cuddling into the blankets. "Are you still okay with me sleeping in here?"
"Of course, why would I? I want you to trust me whole heartedly. I also don't want you to sub-drop on me."
"Sub-drop?"
"Sub-drop is something that happens when the sub has had a play session and not given proper aftercare- cuddles, snacks, whatever, what have you. It's characterized by extreme fatigue, dehydration, severe pain, uncontrollable tears. Sometimes it happens even with good aftercare. It leaves them thinking that they are just a tool to the dominant- which you're not. I want to get to know you-maybe I can change your mind."
"Why would you want to get to know me?"
"One day, you'll look in the mirror and see what I see, what Kaalia sees, what Su sees. You're selling yourself short. Here, drink this." I say as she takes the soda from me. Caffeine isn't the best idea, but that's what she said she liked, so that's what I got.
She just blows a huff of air out of her nose, and wraps her green blanket tightly around her.
I stay awake until I hear deep, even breathing from her. As she sleeps, safe in her dreams and in my arms, I can't help but think I'm on the right path.