**Please note the rating change**
Kahlil watched Minako sleep with a frown. Interestingly enough, he'd scolded her for doing the very same thing multiple times, but honestly, he could see the draw. There was something so peaceful about her when sleep was upon her. His Mina without the weight of the world behind her eyes, because she would never let them see it in her shoulders.
So he watched on.
Each night started like the last; him avoiding sleep and it eventually pulling him down into its endless depths. Nothing but darkness awaited him here.
Each night he prayed for peace.
It never came.
It was better to watch her when she dreamt. He would confess the corners of her mouth would quirk up if it was a good dream. If it was a dream about him, he would swear there was a bit of a glow to her skin. But when she was remembering, whether it be him, or her fellow Senshi, friend or foe the symbol of Venus was visible on her forehead.
Tonight she was remembering.
Some nights he wanted nothing more than to forget, but then he remembered….He remembered the loneliness, the endless searching, the complete and utter lack of purpose.
This was his burden to bear, his punishment for a past he should have controlled.
So be it.
Beneath the symbol of Venus, the skin on her face had a slight sheen of sweat and that pretty mouth of hers was pulled into a frown.
Sometimes the memories were good, far too often, they were not.
Tonight was the latter.
His scream echoed back to him, bouncing off of his pitifully blank walls. Every muscle in his body was clenched tight and his throat ached, indicating that this probably wasn't his first cry, nor would it be the last. His sheets were soaked and now that he'd stopped sweating the cool air made the temperature feel degrees lower than what he knew it was.
It was all par for the course.
Sleep was the enemy and no matter how much he tried to avoid it, eventually it would lull him under only to send him shooting into consciousness with the grace of glass against the pavement. Day after day, sleep was a prison with bars made of ghosts of his mistakes.
This was his own personal hell. Knowing what he'd done, hearing her scream, watching her blood cover his hands just as his covered hers. Guilt ate at the marrow of his bones until it was a vice around his chest restricting his already shallow breaths.
If only he could stay awake, but the dark circles under his eyes that stared back at him every morning mocked that fancy. He was his own worst enemy and from that there was no escape.
The tears that fell from his eyes were gentle.
The nightmares that followed were not.
Minako awoke with a heart wrenching yell and caught his wrist as he reached out for her. She gave a sharp twist and he winced but held his other hand up in surrender. There was something feral in the gold eyes that stared at him. It took a few seconds, but she came back and quickly released his arm throwing herself at him in something so needy, so desperate, that it broke his heart.
Minako's lips found his and her kiss was as wild as her eyes had been. He met her pace for pace, knowing what she needed before she'd even asked.
His hands found her waist and pulled her over him as she shed her sweat soaked tank top. Kahlil bit down on her lip until she let out a harsh cry and ground her hips down against his. Gathering her mane of hair, he twisted it around his fist and pulled her head back until he could devour her neck. The feeling of her nails piercing his back confirmed that this would not be gentle. She didn't want to be coaxed free from the memories of this dream; she wanted them scraped from her, replacing the emotional pain with something bigger, something deeper, something better.
He could do this for her.
Pushing his hands into her panties, he found her wet and waiting for him. A part of him felt bad, as though maybe they should talk about this more, use their words, but under her skin and bones, she was Venusian to the core. She spoke with her body, and she needed with all of her heart. This ache would never be soothed by sweet words and soft reassurances. As though catching his thoughts, Mina paused at pulling his cotton pants down and pulled back enough to meet his eyes with a look that was more gold than blue.
Her kiss was scalding as she lowered herself onto him. Kahlil hissed and threw his head back, catching her hips as she started a rhythm that was as punishing as it was ecstasy. Tonight she needed the control and he was more than willing to oblige.
"Please Kahlil, please baby, please." At her request he caught her hand and slipped it between them, encouraging her to take what she needed.
Knowing she would find her pleasure with ease, he fisted his hand in her hair and swallowed her cry of release. It didn't take more than her pleasure to push him over the edge into waiting oblivion and as he bit down on her shoulder, and knew she'd be sporting the evidence of this night in the morning.
He also knew she would love him all the more for it.
She called it grounding.
He called it an arrest waiting to happen, but she just laughed.
When he pushed her mussed hair from her eyes, tonight he found no laughter, only a past that wouldn't be forgotten again.
"It gets better, Mina. I promise, it will—" Minako's swollen lips brushed over his in the first appearance of tenderness.
"It already has."