IMPORTANT A/N:

You will find out what Amber did and her families story in the NEXT chapter.

But for the meantime, please keep in mind Amber had little to no contact with anyone on the Ark, her brother was practically the only one who really cared for her and spoke to her for the majority of her life (other than somebody else who you'll learn about in the next chapter), she was never really taught how to act in social situations as she expected to live and die underneath the floor for her whole life, as you see with Murphy in the actual show, he is extremely rough around the edges. Amber is that but in more of an elevated way since she was knew no better, whereas Murphy actually socialized and knew right from wrong even if he chose to do the wrong in most circumstances. She never understood what guilt, jealousy, attraction, or any extreme different emotion felt like, as she never really had a reason to feel such things.

Additionally, in her years of solitude Amber became numb, in a way. Happiness was so foreign to her when she was locked up, it was only a distant memory from the few times she felt happy with her brother. She became comfortable with this detachment, she realized if she didn't feel anything anymore, she wouldn't be upset about losing anybody or anything else, even if she only had Murphy left, and he was already gone. You'll find out more of why and how Amber was forced to hide beneath the floor her whole life, because obviously Amber was the first-born child, unlike Octavia who was the second-born, I'm sure you have many questions as to why this is Amber's (and in a way Murphy's) case.

I digress, Amber was so comfortable with the silence that when she got to the ground and she realized that maybe she did have a chance at life, she doesn't exactly know how to handle it. She enjoyed being numb; she enjoyed intimidating the guards on the Ark and being an anomaly. But, now on the ground she's with her brother again, and they're both alive somehow. And there's other kids of all sorts who Amber does not know how to properly interact with because she was only ever taught how to speak to her brother (or her parents, but more on that later), and that was that.

So, she puts on this intimidating façade, she knows people are afraid of her and that's how she wants it to be. If people don't speak to her and don't care about her then she doesn't have to leave her quiet comfort zone. She doesn't want to lose anybody else except herself, if she doesn't let anybody else in then Murphy is all she has to worry about.

But, as you can and will see she can't help now but to feel things. Sorry about this ramble I just thought I'd make sure you all really understand how Amber works.

Also, T/W: The beginning of this chapter includes brief descriptions of injuries that can be interpreted in another context as self-harm, but it is not. It's nothing graphic, but if you wish to skip it it's in the last third of the first paragraph.

Chapter 6

Amber didn't know what she was doing. Her conscious mind lost control of her body, and that definitely wouldn't be the first time it has happened. She cried for a minute, then stopped, then cried again. Her emotions completely out nonsensical. Her heart was beating fast, and her wrist burned as it was scraped and thrashed about in attempt to remove the metal wristband that was clasped upon it. She was a fair distance away from camp, far enough so no one, or so she thought, could hear her exhales and her whimpers of weakness. She could have asked her brother to help her, but she stopped asking for help years ago and swore to herself she never would again. She wedged a pointed rock once more into a small crack in the metal; using all the strength she could gather with her other bandaged wrist to pry it open. It was no use. She stared at her still metal clad wrist now, the band itself was covered in scratches from the rock, it looked like an old toy. Her skin too had thin raw scratches, from when the sharp edged rock slipped and nicked her, none of them were deep enough to cause any harm, though. She wiped the tears and sweat from her forehead, bundling her hair in her hands, her head fell foreword in exhaustion and frustration.

He watched her for half an hour at most, talking to herself and sobbing into the wristband on her arm. She was trying to take it off, and he couldn't help but assume it was because of him. It was strange, the way he felt guilt now. Only hours ago he questioned her own brother about her reliability, assuming the worst about her, he thought she was this emotionless and careless murderer, who only spoke when she had something argumentative or sarcastic to say, or if she was defending her brother. But he watched her face as it changed when he said those things to her in front of everybody, he knew now that she wasn't who she masks herself to be. She's just a girl, or a woman. She was no less a criminal than he was.

Amber sat there on the log with her head in her hands for a countless amount of time, her mind questioning her behavior. Why did she let those words get to her? She didn't care earlier, and now she was crying. Showing weakness. Punching her forehead hard enough to bruise in frustration, she went silent. As if on cue, a branch snapped to the side of her, her heart jumped and her eyes immediately scanned the area to see who or what was out there.

Unafraid, she stood. Amber swapped the rock in her hand for the knife in her waistband and calmly walked towards where she heard the noise. Closing in on the area, she spotted the fabric of a jacket behind a tree. Her feet light as a feather, the stalker didn't see her coming.

Suddenly, a cold knife was pressed against Bellamy's neck and he froze. Amber's face met his when she confirmed who he was, but she didn't move the knife from its place. Her brows furrowed, her eyes darting from his eyes to his jugular.

"You scared, Blake?" She stepped closer, hissing into his ear. She tried to sound intimidating. They were inches apart, she could almost feel his pulse against her blade, it was an eerily familiar feeling. "One move and you're dead."

"You don't scare me." He grumbled through his teeth, straining his neck so the knife wouldn't harm him. "I know you won't kill me."

"That's funny because right about now I kinda really want to." Her body was pressed against his, remove the knife and the situation would be a lot different, but Amber shook that thought from her mind before it ever even came.

The blue hue on the moonlight brought out her golden eyes, Bellamy realized, he couldn't take his off them, her name was so fitting, he wondered if it was just a nickname. He hadn't seen her this close before, he hadn't cared enough to even look at her in a different light. She was beautiful, actually. She was completely and utterly striking, yet at the same time so mysterious and equally indecipherable. He was riddled, she was a swift move away from killing him and his mind was somewhere else.

"So why don't you?" He finally said after the pause. Her thick eyelashes fluttered and she removed her eyes from his to the knife at his neck then back again. She was hesitating.

She finally released her grip on him. "You're not worth it." Amber muttered. Pushing herself off the tree, she stepped back, still holding her knife tightly in warning but her face was bare of any ill intent. Blake still stood pressed against the tree, staring at her. "You were watching me."

"You were trying to take your wristband off." He stated simply, gesturing to her scratched and beaten up hand.

"Was not." She spat immediately, sounding almost like a child. Her cuffed hand fell behind her back, away from Bellamy's view. Never looking him back in the eyes. Blake was taken aback at how juvenile she looked now, like he caught a kid with her hand in the cookie jar.

"I'm—" Bellamy began, he wasn't really sure of what he was about to say, but before he got a chance to continue she cut him off, saving the apology he confusingly felt the urge to give.

"I don't want to hear it, Blake." She paused, wiping hair away from her face with her hand that held the knife, almost in unease, "I—I'm going to bed." She took off, still managing to avoid eye contact. He was almost in shock, this girl was so bewildering. He hated it. He hated how she was such a challenge to figure out; because it only made him want to know more, find out who she really is. It frustrated him and he couldn't understand why. He stared off in the distance, cursing at himself. She was just another criminal, so why was she so alluring?

It had been three days since they got back from finding Jasper. Three days since Bellamy had put her on blast in front of the entire camp. Meaning, three days of nobody looking Amber in the eye, and her brother treading softly around her as if she was about to explode or something. Jasper kept Amber up most of the night. She slept deep in higher level of the drop ship, a whole dark corner just to herself. She managed to find scraps of material to use as a pillow, but nothing to use as a blanket. Amber still cursed the guards on the Ark for never supplying her a jacket like they did to the other kids. All she had was her dirty white tank top; her torn and thin grey t-shirt, and her baggy high-rise jeans on the verge of tearing at the knees. She lifted her grey top out of boredom, taking her mind off Jasper's bloodcurdling screams, unbuttoning her jeans for a closer look, she eyed the patch of fabric at her waist, it was clean of any substance other than blood, which was a good sign she assumed. She somehow managed to keep it from being infected; maybe she was lucky after all. Tucking her shirt back into her pants and re-buttoning them up, she heard the worst of Jasper's screams. Something was wrong.

Amber paced the room for no less than four minutes, deciding whether to descend into the lower drop ship floor where she'd meet Clarke and the others. With a smack to her own face, she climbed down the ladder.

"—Power hungry self-serving jackass." Amber listened as she ascended, finally hopping onto the ground with a light thud, not drawing any attention to herself. "He doesn't care about anyone but himself." She watched the group from behind, Monty looked up at Octavia, adding, "No offence."

Octavia shrugged, and Finn begun, "Yeah. Bellamy is all that. But he also happens to be right."

Then, they all went silent. Amber noticed how close they all seemed. Something struck inside her, and it felt odd. Like she almost wanted to be with them, sitting there, worried for their friend. It confused her, she was always strong, independent and entirely by herself. John couldn't always steal rations for her; she had to do it herself. She learnt how to trust herself and her instincts; she told herself she never really needed anyone else because John couldn't stay around forever. He had the chance to live his life like anyone else would, Amber would just always be in the shadows, surviving, and she accepted that. But now, her mind was telling her she wanted somebody else there for her, she wanted to care and she wanted to be cared for. Amber watched these friends and she wanted to be apart of it, a part of something. She never, ever, felt sorry for herself. And she never would. However, a part of her felt like she was missing out on something she couldn't quiet understand nor grasp—and that was friendship.

John Murphy sat on a log watching teenagers attempt to built tents with rocks, sticks and parachute material. His hand absentmindedly fumbling with his knife, he hardly noticed when his sister softly sat next to him, twisting her hands together firmly and exhaling loudly to get his attention.

"Didn't get much sleep either?" John questioned, noticing the purple tint to her under eye circles, and the more-so-than-usual ill-tempered expression on her face.

"No, not really. Jasper keep you up too, huh?" Amber brushed her knotted hair behind her ears, exposing her face fully to John. He was truly taken aback by how much older she looked now. Before they reunited she looked younger than him, thin and frail, she could hardly stand taller than most kids he knew on the Ark even though she was years older than he was. Now she had a fit, slightly muscular body, her face was—womanly and pointed, she looked healthier, even if she, like everyone on the ground, hadn't eaten much at all. And her eyes were as bright as ever.

John nodded, "Hey Amb—about what Blake said the other day—"

"John—" Amber stopped her brother, "I really couldn't care less about what that headass said about me." Amber shrugged, "Besides, I'm still surprised you let him boss you around like you're some little lap dog."

"I'm not his lap dog." John snapped, taking Amber aback, "Can you for just this once just keep to yourself Amber?"

Amber stood abruptly, eyeing her brother who avoided eye contact. "John I have spent my whole life keeping to myself—" Her voice was thick with something she couldn't identify, she was almost choked up, "what has gotten into you?"

"Ever since we got to the ground you've been drawing attention to yourself, going against Bellamy, punching Wells, almost getting yourself killed—twice. Everyone's talking about you. You of all people should—"

"Don't you dare say what I think you're about to say." Amber was the one to snap this time, she shifted on her feet, her cheeks flushed. "Why does everyone, and apparently including my own fucking brother, think I'm some homicidal maniac?" She pulled her hair behind her ears in frustration. "I've done nothing wrong and—" She pointed directly at her sibling's face, finally getting him to make eye contact "— you know it."

"Amber, they all think you're gonna snap." His voice was soft, but his intent was far from that.

"I've had enough, John. I really have had enough." She turned to storm away, only to be met with Bellamy Blake's firm chest. Underneath her breath she murmured, "Speaking of the devil."

Blake did not make eye contact with Amber, a common theme in their correspondence or lack thereof. Instead, he looked at her brother.

"We're going hunting." Bellamy's face was stern with authority. Amber had to hand it to him, he was definitely persuasive enough to have the whole camp at his feet. John stood, assuming he would join them, but instead Blake's eyes told him otherwise. They were suddenly met with Amber's. "Amber, you're with me." Despite her shock filled expression, he handed her a knife which she took apprehensively, their fingers grazing each other for a second as they stared each other down. "Let's go." And that was that. John stayed put, guilt in his stomach and surprise on his face.

Amber had her knife out and her instincts ready, the small hunting group eyed what she could identify as a pig and they, meaning the selfish and narcissistic Bellamy, were going to kill it. He told them to quiet down, saying that the pigs his, and Amber rolled her eyes at the way he held his axe like he thought himself as a seasoned professional, which he was most definitely the opposite of. Amber crept closely behind him, ready to take the kill if Blake failed. But, a sudden crack of a stick behind them had Blake's axe flying the opposite direction. The pig squealed as it realized it was being hunted, and started off deeper into the forest. Half of the hunting party followed the animal, but Amber, Atom and Blake stayed once they found who was responsible for the intrusion. Inches away from the tree Blake's axe impaled was a small girl, no older than 12.

"Who the hell are you?" Bellamy said breathlessly.

The girl looked stunned, Amber couldn't blame her though, if Blake didn't have a lousy shot she would be dead. "Charlotte." She replied promptly.

"I almost killed you." No shit, Sherlock, Amber thought, watching Bellamy retrieve his axe from the tree. "Why aren't you back at camp?"

"W—Well the guy who was dying—I just couldn't listen anymore." She answered truthfully, Amber felt her brows furrow. She stepped forward putting herself closer to the girl than Bellamy and Atom, almost instinctively. She saw Blake look at her questionably for a moment, but it was short-lived.

"There's grounders out here." Atom spoke, Amber had neutral feelings about the guy, his energy didn't piss her off nearly as much as Blake's presence did. "It's dangerous for a little girl." Spoke too soon, now Amber was turned off. Too dangerous for a little girl but not for the 13 year old boys chasing after that pig right that moment? Amber rolled her eyes.

"I'm not little." Charlotte responded. Amber smiled unconsciously, which Bellamy caught, while also realizing he was smiling, too.

"Okay then, but you can't hunt—" Blake begun pulling out a knife from his belt, "without a weapon." She took it without question. Amber couldn't help but see herself in this girl who so clearly has had to grow up so fast. "Ever killed anything before?" Bellamy asked, Amber's brows twitched, there was no carefulness in his voice, he sounded like he wouldn't care if her answer was yes. "Who knows, maybe you're good at it." Her mind wanted to question this, Amber didn't know how to react. He was encouraging her, this 'little' girl, to kill, could Bellamy Blake become any more hypocritical?

After catching up with the kids who ran after the pig, the hunting expedition proved to be the opposite of a success. The pig got away and no other creature, not even a bug, was in sight.

Amber was crouching down at a small stream, cupping her hands and sipping on the probably sickeningly dirty water. Everyone else stood on watch, waiting for something to stir among the trees. After her final sip, Amber stood, and just as she was fully standing, a bellowing and low noise came from the distance.

"Grounders." She whispered, making eye contact with Bellamy. He was the first to run, and everyone followed suddenly.

Amber was sprinting beside Blake, but she quickly realized Charlotte was falling behind, unable to catch up, stopping in her tracks and earning a look from Bellamy who had no choice but to keep running, Amber turned abruptly and ran up the short hill Charlotte was making her way down and grabbed the girls hand, pulling her roughly.

"Come on! There are caves this way!" Bellamy called out, Amber quickened her pace. And much to her surprise, Blake slowed down so Amber and Charlotte could catch up. Amber watched as the boy grabbed hold of Charlotte's other hand and helped as the three of them climbed up a steep hill. The older girl heard coughing and sounds of struggle behind them, and she knew someone had fallen behind. But, they were already at the cave and he was deep in the toxic fog. The golden-eyed girl stood beside Blake as he panted, hearing his friend call his name, but Bellamy unable to help. Bellamy shielded his face, and Amber began to cough somewhat violently, suddenly, he started towards her, placing his hands firmly on her lower back, pushing her inside with him behind her.

End of Chapter

A/N:

So, Bellamy and Amber have started to speak, even if they are butting heads. Their ship names Bellamber, just saying.

Get ready for the next chapter, you'll find out all about Amber's past. Please, leave a review, it'll prompt me to post the next chapter earlier, since it's already written :-)

Lots of love.